章 35: Chapter 33
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When I was invited by Percy to help him, I expected things to go smoothly, I mean I had derailed the plot like a supreme chad. But I failed to account for one little, almost non important and easily forgettable detail. Percy has even worse luck than me.
The quest was simple, go to the underworld and retrieve Percy's mom, alas simple was not a word or state of life we demigods could enjoy.
But Adam, what do you mean? Well, here I was running from a cyclops who was basically immune to damage, why was the cyclops attacking us? Well, Percy smells like the best fucking thing that's why.
"Don't you have anything to kill him?" Percy asked.
"Of course Percy, I enjoy running for my life, what do you think?!" There were idiots and then there was Percy, I mean come on, if I could kill the bastard, I would.
"You don't have to be an ass," Percy replied.
"An ass?! I am running with you guys!" This little shit thought I was being an ass?! Well let me show him what an ass is, "Etativel!" I levitated myself over the monster, "Now I'm being an ass! See the difference!?"
"Levitate us!" Annabeth demanded, "I know he's an idiot, but I refuse to die because of it!" Not like I was going to let them die… I wasn't I swear it!
"Etativel ycreP dna Htebanna!" I rolled my eyes at her, as I levitated them out of the cyclops reach, "And here I thought I had bad luck, so far we have fought three minotaurs, one cyclops, and a big ass snake,"
"Is not that bad," Percy muttered.
"We left the camp thirty minutes ago! Thirty!" Both me and Annabeth shouted.
"Sorry?" Percy chuckled.
"Alright… so, I doubt we will make it to the underworld alive, so any ideas?" I asked Annabeth, only Annabeth, Percy was a nice guy, but… yeah.
"Well, first we have to find an entrance to the underworld," Annabeth sighed.
"Come down!" The cyclops whined, jumping over and over again trying to reach us.
"I know one," I answered, turning my eyes to the cyclops, "You are on a diet now, look at how fat you are… too many demigods I tell you, you need more veggies, less godly children,"
"Is it wise to tease him?" Percy asked with a frown.
"I enjoy it," I shrugged, "Besides your fish smells attract them regardless of my teasing… so, good luck in the future,"
"Shut up Percy," Annabeth ordered, "Now about that entrance to the underworld… where is it?" She asked me.
"In the train station, close to the Starbucks that is nearby the station," I answered getting a few odd looks from Percy and Annabeth, "What? Hades likes his Starbucks, and so does Persephone, so he created a door close to his favorite store," that was literally the expiation Hades gave me.
"You know lord Hades?" Annabeth muttered in disbelief.
Bitch I am going places, "Yes, we know each other, nothing bad I assure you,"
"Did you know he took my mom?" Percy asked angry.
"Yes, and so did you," I nodded, unsure why he was angry, "If you are asking if I knew and didn't do anything to rescue her, then yes… I mean, I have no power over that, what did you expect,"
"I…" Percy muttered.
"No time for that…" Annabeth sighed, "can you teleport us to the specific Starbucks?"
"Yes, and no," I sighed, "I have wasted a lot of mana avoiding the hurricane Percy," I pointed to Percy who frowned at that, "Don't get mad man, it's the truth," I chuckled.
"So you don't have enough mana?" Annabeth sighed and I shook my head.
"I do, but if I learned something during my first quest was to never waste any mana, and if I teleport us I will be dry for a bit… besides for some reason Percy is what I like to call a magical leech, levitating him is costing me twice as much mana as is taking me to levitate the both of us,"
"Of course Percy had to had another stupid thing," Annabeth muttered.
"Sorry," Percy muttered.
"It's alright," I shrugged, "I think is because of your dad, as the son of one of the big three you probably have a bigger pool of mana which in turn would make you heavier mana wise or it would give you a considerably better Magic resistance than most, or if my theory is correct… your body is simply rejecting my hold, and as a result it consumes a lot more… that's just a theory though,"
"Can you fly us there?" Annabeth asked and I chuckled.
"And what? Say hi to New York from the skies?" I chuckled, "You do realize I don't have any invisibility spells,"
"Then… I have an idea," Annabeth grinned, and I didn't like it.
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Annabeth's plan was… well, it made me question if she was as smart as she thought she was, I mean… her idea was… so basic… stealing a car and driving that shit like GTA.
The plan had other details like me changing our looks to not get profiled as criminals and stuffz
In this Plan Annabeth would drive, I would keep the cyclops at bay with my magic and Percy… well he would exist in the car? Man I don't know, so far his utility to the team has been attracting monsters like crazy and stuff.
"I am having an inner struggle to decide if you are smart or simply an idiot with knowledge," I sighed, shooting fire balls at the monster.
"Another monster in front of us!" Percy shouted.
"I will kill you before we rescue your mom… you have no idea how close to that point I am," I sighed, "Oh well, the more the merrier! Come at me fuckers, I am a demigod low in fat, dairy free, gluten free, keto friendly, low in sodium and paleo friendly!" I chuckled, as I took a deep breath to shout a mighty battle cry! "I. AM. ORGANICCCCC!"
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