31レビュー
4.17
- テキストの品質
- アップデートの安定性
- ストーリー展開
- キャラクターデザイン
- 世界の背景
あなたの考えを他の人と共有してください
レビューを書く
this story is very good so far and I'm looking forward for more chapters and how the story will continue onwards. so please keep up the good work
Update please update please update please update please update please update please update please update please update please update please update please update please update
Ugh... This is stupid. +1 The hero is weak and stupid, but the author says that he is smart and cool....................................................
more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters
[img=exp][img=exp][img=recommend][img=exp][img=recommend][img=exp][img=recommend][img=exp][img=recommend][img=exp][img=recommend][img=exp][img=recommend][img=exp]
Good. ........................................................................................................................................
This a great story but if those that do not like fast paced story you might not like this story but i say you should at least give it a chance.
First, I thank you for making a fanfic. It's not a new idea but I can still see your passion and individuality, how you use it differently from other. The things you got to improve is your grammar. Then the character itself(You give him bad @ss background with epic death yet he turn dumb in earthland. It's like, 'WTF mate? Aren't you an elite SEAL? Why did you do such foolish stuff??!! And you turn into manwhore?? '.. ) You should read more, I don't mean you didn't read. What I mean is for you to see how each author put their imagination into words. How they translate it from idea into readable material. Then compare note with other author, maybe in discord? And the story flow, that's important so when reader read it, the plot is smooth flowing from A to B.. Good job. Keep going..
more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more ,
[img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update]
Not going to flame you are anything just the mc should be a high schooler with average on everything the only reason I'm saying this is because the mc is suppose to be smart and mature yet he is not dumb per say but he is inexperienced and not very CIA material lol anyway your writing is good just make sure he has CONSTANT VIGILANCE lol
I read this novel expecting a genius trained agent transported to Fairy Tail world but all I see from the Mc in the 9 chapters I read so far is that the MC is acting like an idiot without any common sense. If the MC is an average naive highschool student or something similar sure the 9 chapters I read before making this review probably make sense.
The author is new writer and we can see his lack of experience in early chapters. However the quality of the story has increased in the later chapters. The novel might have its own flaw but reader can atleast give it a try and not drop it early based on its early chapters.
MC is supposed to be a CIA agent but acts like a teenager he said "Holy "Shit" ,"Shit" more times than normal conversation in 2nd chapter he is supposed to be a good guy but blew up a whole inn which killed who knows how many people and thinks nothing of it dude your character background and personality doesn't match it's total crap
Very noice i enjoy it alot good very good and nice power yes 10/10 100%.....................................................................
would that it would be better if you look for those of Tartaros and you can copy their magic (also those of "oracion 6", "grymor heart"), among other dark grains that have good powers but do not know how to get the potential (that of "arc of the incarnation "it is a shame to have that power and not create better things, he was defeated because he did not know how to have a variety of magic and because of the power of friendship).
more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs).
A very good fairy tail fanfic with lots of potential.👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍
interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing ,
[img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp]
Ugh... This is stupid. Has a photographic mind but does not use it. (Knows he has super strength but always forgets about it) Is one of the best CIA agent but tells the first person he meet all his secrets. I mean, this would've been more interesting if there were no background story at all because it's basically useless and unnecessary. He acts like your average otaku with martial arts training. Who in the right mind would think that a person with photgraphic mind, experience as a SEAL, and experience as an undercover agent would do half the stupid sh*t he's done since he got there. Going to a town wearing clothes like Neo even though it's weird as f*ck to wear something like that to a town in a tropic place. Killing tens to hundreds of people by throwing a stone to an inn while having super strength (He keeps forgetting he has it even though he has a photographic mind) Traumatized a would be r*pe victim by killing someone into splatter in front of her thereby coating her with the blood and guts. Forgetting that he has super strength even though he has a photgraphic mind. Panics after killing someone. F*cking someone who is basically drugged by your natural aphrodisiac (that is basically r*pe) Telling someone you barely know everything about you without thinking of consequence. Erasing her memory and acting like nothing has happened. Seriously! This guy is a psychopath. A stupid psychopath but psychopath nonetheless.
This is one of those supposed genius badass MC, but in reality is actually a moronic loser. Dude keeps talking out loud to his system (in front of everybody) and recklessly test his powers (mofo demolished an entire inn, just to test his timestop magic, and he was like "meh") without a care for any consequences. He also decided to tell the first girl he met, EVERYTHING about him, after he was done raping her. Now before anyone starts frothing at the mouth, at my accusation, let's give some context. MC received some hidden skills from god, one of which is a pheromone based aphrodisiac. MC didn't realize this until it already affected the receptionist of the inn he was staying. MC ask the system to elaborate upon the skill, system stated that only way to alleviate the lust it to either, have *** with the MC, or let the lust fade away after a while (24hrs). Now this is where the rapey part comes in; Rather than be respectable human being and just keep his distance and let the effect fade away, MC made like a creep and had his way with the poor girl. Anyways, the only good thing about this story is the author. He at least admits his inexperience, and is receptive to criticism, so there's a high chance of improvement. But until then, this work is trash.
ネタバレを明かす
Mc is dumb, you know ..if you want to make him like that better make his background story that he is an average student or something like that not that he is MIT and SEALl...the mc like he has no experience
lol author lets be real here....giving the mc that much IQ ain't a good idea. cuz if he fucks up and does some dumb shit...then u will get flamed...always give the mc same IQ as u...LOL
Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu
interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing .
It has a good start I hope to see how the fic continues to develop and see if it blooms or withers Mm I hope I keep reading this and see which way it goes
actually this is a promising story, if mc is not beta with his high iq and level of genius that makes him look more idiot than any mc beta, then God beta is also annoying, and annoying simp system, story ideas can actually work well, but this is really just pure trash.
this story is very good so far and I'm looking forward for more chapters and how the story will continue onwards. so please keep up the good work
Update please update please update please update please update please update please update please update please update please update please update please update please update
Ugh... This is stupid. +1 The hero is weak and stupid, but the author says that he is smart and cool....................................................
more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters , more chapters
[img=exp][img=exp][img=recommend][img=exp][img=recommend][img=exp][img=recommend][img=exp][img=recommend][img=exp][img=recommend][img=exp][img=recommend][img=exp]
Good. ........................................................................................................................................
This a great story but if those that do not like fast paced story you might not like this story but i say you should at least give it a chance.
First, I thank you for making a fanfic. It's not a new idea but I can still see your passion and individuality, how you use it differently from other. The things you got to improve is your grammar. Then the character itself(You give him bad @ss background with epic death yet he turn dumb in earthland. It's like, 'WTF mate? Aren't you an elite SEAL? Why did you do such foolish stuff??!! And you turn into manwhore?? '.. ) You should read more, I don't mean you didn't read. What I mean is for you to see how each author put their imagination into words. How they translate it from idea into readable material. Then compare note with other author, maybe in discord? And the story flow, that's important so when reader read it, the plot is smooth flowing from A to B.. Good job. Keep going..
more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more , more ,
[img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update]
Not going to flame you are anything just the mc should be a high schooler with average on everything the only reason I'm saying this is because the mc is suppose to be smart and mature yet he is not dumb per say but he is inexperienced and not very CIA material lol anyway your writing is good just make sure he has CONSTANT VIGILANCE lol
I read this novel expecting a genius trained agent transported to Fairy Tail world but all I see from the Mc in the 9 chapters I read so far is that the MC is acting like an idiot without any common sense. If the MC is an average naive highschool student or something similar sure the 9 chapters I read before making this review probably make sense.
The author is new writer and we can see his lack of experience in early chapters. However the quality of the story has increased in the later chapters. The novel might have its own flaw but reader can atleast give it a try and not drop it early based on its early chapters.
MC is supposed to be a CIA agent but acts like a teenager he said "Holy "Shit" ,"Shit" more times than normal conversation in 2nd chapter he is supposed to be a good guy but blew up a whole inn which killed who knows how many people and thinks nothing of it dude your character background and personality doesn't match it's total crap
Very noice i enjoy it alot good very good and nice power yes 10/10 100%.....................................................................
would that it would be better if you look for those of Tartaros and you can copy their magic (also those of "oracion 6", "grymor heart"), among other dark grains that have good powers but do not know how to get the potential (that of "arc of the incarnation "it is a shame to have that power and not create better things, he was defeated because he did not know how to have a variety of magic and because of the power of friendship).
more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs). more : irene belserion(hot milfs).
A very good fairy tail fanfic with lots of potential.👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍
interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing , interesing ,
[img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp]
Ugh... This is stupid. Has a photographic mind but does not use it. (Knows he has super strength but always forgets about it) Is one of the best CIA agent but tells the first person he meet all his secrets. I mean, this would've been more interesting if there were no background story at all because it's basically useless and unnecessary. He acts like your average otaku with martial arts training. Who in the right mind would think that a person with photgraphic mind, experience as a SEAL, and experience as an undercover agent would do half the stupid sh*t he's done since he got there. Going to a town wearing clothes like Neo even though it's weird as f*ck to wear something like that to a town in a tropic place. Killing tens to hundreds of people by throwing a stone to an inn while having super strength (He keeps forgetting he has it even though he has a photographic mind) Traumatized a would be r*pe victim by killing someone into splatter in front of her thereby coating her with the blood and guts. Forgetting that he has super strength even though he has a photgraphic mind. Panics after killing someone. F*cking someone who is basically drugged by your natural aphrodisiac (that is basically r*pe) Telling someone you barely know everything about you without thinking of consequence. Erasing her memory and acting like nothing has happened. Seriously! This guy is a psychopath. A stupid psychopath but psychopath nonetheless.
This is one of those supposed genius badass MC, but in reality is actually a moronic loser. Dude keeps talking out loud to his system (in front of everybody) and recklessly test his powers (mofo demolished an entire inn, just to test his timestop magic, and he was like "meh") without a care for any consequences. He also decided to tell the first girl he met, EVERYTHING about him, after he was done raping her. Now before anyone starts frothing at the mouth, at my accusation, let's give some context. MC received some hidden skills from god, one of which is a pheromone based aphrodisiac. MC didn't realize this until it already affected the receptionist of the inn he was staying. MC ask the system to elaborate upon the skill, system stated that only way to alleviate the lust it to either, have *** with the MC, or let the lust fade away after a while (24hrs). Now this is where the rapey part comes in; Rather than be respectable human being and just keep his distance and let the effect fade away, MC made like a creep and had his way with the poor girl. Anyways, the only good thing about this story is the author. He at least admits his inexperience, and is receptive to criticism, so there's a high chance of improvement. But until then, this work is trash.
ネタバレを明かす Mc is dumb, you know ..if you want to make him like that better make his background story that he is an average student or something like that not that he is MIT and SEALl...the mc like he has no experience
lol author lets be real here....giving the mc that much IQ ain't a good idea. cuz if he fucks up and does some dumb shit...then u will get flamed...always give the mc same IQ as u...LOL
Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu Erza Best waifu
interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing . interesing .
It has a good start I hope to see how the fic continues to develop and see if it blooms or withers Mm I hope I keep reading this and see which way it goes
actually this is a promising story, if mc is not beta with his high iq and level of genius that makes him look more idiot than any mc beta, then God beta is also annoying, and annoying simp system, story ideas can actually work well, but this is really just pure trash.