3レビュー
- テキストの品質
- アップデートの安定性
- ストーリー展開
- キャラクターデザイン
- 世界の背景
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Obligatory Shameless author self-review. Don't mind me. I'm just a sexy author who wants to review himself. Tee hee ---------------------------------------------
Espero que el MC se vuelva su caballero, estaría bien que obtuviera el poder de un fruta del diablo sin su debilidad obviamente, yo creo que le potenciaría sus capacidades seria la fruta del rayo, luz, fuego la habilidad de una zona mítica como la del fénix pero o eso claro, más adelante en la historia. Espero no molestar y que el Autor San sea considerado conmigo. Excelente Historia :))
Not gonna lie, I was excited to see you making a rewrite of this story and was hoping to read how you’ve improved it but I’m sad to say that I’m pretty disappointed. It was fairly well done at first and I was getting into it, but then it just felt like you didn’t change anything. The romance is rushed with no foundation, the MC at first seemed like he was thinking out his actions (back when he was joining the Mercenary guild) but then he just got OP too fast that there’s no story or character development. The system gives out points like there’s no tomorrow, and the stuff he gets is ridiculous (he already has Excalibur, SSS tier stuff, and hundreds of thousands of points, gives other characters access to systems, and a lot more within the first 16 chapters). There’s just no real weight behind the story and feels as hollow as every other generic overpowered fanfic. I’m not going at the author or anything, I was just hoping for something better from a rewrite. Writing quality - 4 Update stability - 4 Story development - 1 Character design - 1 World background - 2
Obligatory Shameless author self-review. Don't mind me. I'm just a sexy author who wants to review himself. Tee hee ---------------------------------------------
Espero que el MC se vuelva su caballero, estaría bien que obtuviera el poder de un fruta del diablo sin su debilidad obviamente, yo creo que le potenciaría sus capacidades seria la fruta del rayo, luz, fuego la habilidad de una zona mítica como la del fénix pero o eso claro, más adelante en la historia. Espero no molestar y que el Autor San sea considerado conmigo. Excelente Historia :))
Not gonna lie, I was excited to see you making a rewrite of this story and was hoping to read how you’ve improved it but I’m sad to say that I’m pretty disappointed. It was fairly well done at first and I was getting into it, but then it just felt like you didn’t change anything. The romance is rushed with no foundation, the MC at first seemed like he was thinking out his actions (back when he was joining the Mercenary guild) but then he just got OP too fast that there’s no story or character development. The system gives out points like there’s no tomorrow, and the stuff he gets is ridiculous (he already has Excalibur, SSS tier stuff, and hundreds of thousands of points, gives other characters access to systems, and a lot more within the first 16 chapters). There’s just no real weight behind the story and feels as hollow as every other generic overpowered fanfic. I’m not going at the author or anything, I was just hoping for something better from a rewrite. Writing quality - 4 Update stability - 4 Story development - 1 Character design - 1 World background - 2