章 31: Samantha's anger
He went up slowly, almost fearing that the room would collapse if he was to walk in a hurry.
" He reached for Acer, took him in his arms and kissed him on his little forehead...a slow careful kiss..."
" He hasn't bathed yet, honey and I don't know where my clothes are."
" Oh, am sorry..."
" I understand, I come second to Acer."
" Acer...Acer..." He let the name sink in for a bit, "it's a really great name." He placed Acer back in the crib and went to Samantha.
" Am sorry, am late honey, I always am...and I keep missing important days."
He wasn't upset when he came back, almost as if he didn't deserve to be here with Samantha and every time he had here with her was a precious gift.
" You are not upset with me, that i was nakad with Thanos?"
" No honey, I know you did it to trigger some reaction from him to bring me back but that was dangerous. You never know who decides to pop up. Don't do that again."
" Hmmmm..." Samantha nodded. He kissed her on the cheeks.
" I'll bring you pajamas and bath Acer and then I can cook us dinner."
" Acer has to eat too." Samantha told him, She said with regret. " I can't breast feed him because of the chemo..."
" I know honey."
" I can do all that."
" Maybe me and Acer should have stayed with Lisa. He is so tiny, and he needs all the attention. Maybe..."
" Maybe nothing... Don't underestimate me." he said handing her a grey long sleeved pajama top and pajama pants set.
" They are V necked... making them easy for you to wear."
Samantha stood still not doing anything.
" what?"
" Aren't you leaving so that I can change?"
" Am the only person here with you and am your husband, am entitled to your nakeness. It's ok for Thanos to see you naked but it's not for me?"
" Because he doesn't find me repulsive like you do."
" What??? how did you come to such conclusion?
He looked at her, her eyes where very alert but focused at nothing."
He could see the hurt in her eyes, so he kept quiet.
" We always argue about the same thing over and over."
" Whose fault is it? You make me feel like am the horniest bitch on earth."
" I'll take Acer to the kitchen with me., you need to calm the hell down"
There is a long corridor from this room to the stairs on your way downstairs. I'll be able to see you from there because this house is an open plan house, if you need me let me know."
" Whatever."
In the Living room, he put the baby in the rocking crib while he made his bottle.
He had fed the baby and bathed him in his room. When he went back to their room Samantha had on her pajamas and slept.
He could see she had cried again...
" Here, you can stay with him while I make dinner."
" She turned to the side and waited for him to place Acer in her arms."
" You are not going to talk to me?"
" ... "
It was passed 8 in the evening when they both sat at the dinning table to eat. All the while, he looked at her with flashes of regret, she was his wife, Even if one day she decided, he was a monster, he wouldn't blame her but her needs where his to satisfy... It wasn't just her, he also wanted to make love to her so badly.
Was regret really a reason to not be the husband he has always wanted to be? And to a wife who treasured him and wanted to do things with him unlike Heather.
He watched as she ate small slow bite, he saw her look filled with anger.
With the solem mood, dinner was over in no time.
Samantha walked upstairs, bumping onto furniture here and there.
She heard the sound of light switches as she brushed her teeth in the couple's bathroom.
The mood in their room was sickening. Back in Blue sky, when they fought about this topic, Nigel just ended up changing the topic and Samantha would go with the flow.
She kissed the sleeping Acer and got into bed. She felt the presence of Nigel on the bed and didn't care about him.
" Samantha...."
" Not now...just let me be and your annoying voice will wake Acer up."
The distance between them was so wide he had to forcefully yank Samantha to his side.
" What the f*ck..."
" You don't need this?" He said as he removed the helmet knitted headsock from her head.
Samantha's first reaction was of irritation...
" what are you doing? give it back." She sat erectly.
He ran his fingers in her hair and some of it was left tangled on his fingers.
" It's ok to shaved these off, I have never cared about your looks. It's always been about how you made me feel here. "
He held her hand to his chest.
His heart beating faster than normal.
A tear rolled down from the corner of her eye.
"Am always sorry to you, because, I don't think I deserve you. I always think I love you unconditionally but it's the other way around. I have more baggage than I would like but you still are here with me, waiting on my indecisiveness."
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