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14.68% The Rebirth Of A White Robe Man: I'll Follow You This Time (BL) / Chapter 52: Shao Cheng Deep Inner Thought. In Doubt And Suspicion. "Is It Worth It?"

章 52: Shao Cheng Deep Inner Thought. In Doubt And Suspicion. "Is It Worth It?"

When Shao Cheng deemed that Ren Yuan has truly left during the time that he was sleeping deeply, strangely enough, Shao Cheng felt utter relief at the thought that the older man will not witness his currently pathetic state.

After all, how could he explain the sudden emergence of pain and the unexplainable change of his body as a sudden split abruptly appeared once in a while on his pale skin causing some blood to be spilled on his once washed out clothes that Ren Yuan has also cleaned up?

Although, Shao Cheng really needed a new set of clothes soon.

As for being angry and raging for the older man leaving him all alone in their hidden place and not listening to his request, well what can Shao Cheng do but feel a bit disheartened by it?

Suddenly a pathetically ironic smile appear on his pale face as his entire body wracked up with unimaginable torturous pain, it isn't that surprising that the older man didn't listen to his words at all and has left him all alone.

Because in the end, he isn't important to Ren Yuan in the first place.

Shao Cheng is just one of the many people that the older man is an acquaintance of, he isn't even a tiny bit special to Ren Yuan.

After all, this young Ren Yuan isn't that previous life Ren Yuan where he has been the most important person to that man entire life, ah, Shao Cheng felt a bit uncomfortable thinking about it.

Although the man's past actions have shown a resemblance of trust and belief during the time that they have been running and hiding from the past few days, in the end, Shao Cheng doesn't completely believe the older man actions.

There is always that lingering doubt and suspicion inside him that whisper that Ren Yuan is just pretending it all out because, from his memories and what he knew all about him, Ren Yuan is a pretty guarded man and truly hard to become intimate with him in a true sense.

Especially when all Shao Cheng has done was a few slight deceitful acts and suffering a bit of hardship for him, couldn't really win him so easily.

In the previous life, others have done far more severe actions and serious sacrifices to get close to him, Shao Cheng even tried to plant some spy to the man side but all of it failed horribly, so what makes him different from the tiny sacrifice that he has done?

Shao Cheng is unable to truly believe Ren Yuan's rather close and gentle approach, many have fallen from that man's hands and skillful mask, there is a reason why the man has been the most dangerous and difficult among his enemies in the previous life. 

Really, it was quite unbelievable how easy it is to get the man's compassion and sympathy.

If this was the previous life after his death, then Shao Cheng can truly believe in him, but this Ren Yuan in the new life isn't the same from his memories, it will take quite a while for Shao Cheng to completely and truly believe everything that Ren Yuan will be displaying no matter how distressing it is.

In a true sense, this is a new chance, new life and a new beginning in Shao Cheng life, everything has to start all over again which is utterly unpleasant since Shao Cheng still has a set of memories of a different life that will constantly remind him that no one else remember it.

This is his burden to carry for his entire life, a fitting punishment for what he has done and a great exchange for another chance in life.

"Urgh…"

But there is no time to think more deeply regarding about Ren Yuan's actions has been true or fake all along as his small body convulses from overwhelming pain while biting his lip tightly that it started bleeding as he tastes the blood on his mouth.

Having special power and ability might sound formidable and impressive but the weight and obligation of using it isn't something that a person can easily carry, Shao Cheng is just fortunate enough to be a person that can forbear and it showed as he survived again and again from all the hardship and suffering he has experience in two lifetimes.

Or maybe he is really a very unfortunate person to experience such a life?

Shao Cheng doesn't know, but since he isn't completely broken yet then its good right?

Well, this shouldn't be the time to be thinking such philosophy about his own life as his vision became haze from the torturous pain while focusing his entire attention at the crimson robes that is reminding him about not to pass out at this time.

With a twisted smile on his sweaty pale face, Shao Cheng continues to desperately grab the crimson robe tightly on his hand since it was what is currently keeping him afloat during this painful moment, as it belongs to his anchor in this new life of his.

Really quite pathetic and wretched of him to be this obsessed with such a man as a strangle laugh escape his bleeding lip.

Shao Cheng couldn't help but wonder why is it that he couldn't live for himself but only for others? To suffer this kind of pain, hardship, and struggle for just a promise of a previous life that has long been forgotten from the man he has spoken such a word from?

Isn't it utterly insane and crazy to be doing such a thing?

However, that was just the kind of person Shao Cheng is, as he fights the waning consciousness of his as the pain tried to make him succumb to a wonderful ignorant bliss, but he knew that he couldn't allow that to happen.

He will never do it, turning his back and forgetting a promise to a wonderfully amazing man that has given his all to a dead man. 

And now it was just his turn to fulfill his, so he wouldn't allow himself to close his eyes.

Right now, that wonderfully amazing man is out there all alone with dangerous people that are trying to take his life away, Shao Cheng doesn't care if Ren Yuan is in a healthy condition if he is powerful or not because Shao Cheng will never stop being anxious and concern about the man's well being and safety.

Just like Shao Cheng once said, Ren Yuan has become his solace in this new life of his, although he would love to help and deliver about what he owed to the original Shao Cheng biological family because of the previous life mistakes, however, his first and foremost priority will always be about Ren Yuan sake.

Shao Cheng doesn't really know how deep his present obsession was to Ren Yuan truly is, but If the man ever dies… Shao Cheng won't find any meaning in his new life if that person left this world.

Because just like what he promised, Shao Cheng will resolutely follow him, even in death, though he might not be able to follow him to the afterlife and reincarnate with him together since Shao Cheng would have failed the deal with Purple and the Empire spirit form so he has to stay and face the consequences.

So… please let this pain end soon, it was not because he is frightened of the torture, but he is extremely worried of Ren Yuan fighting all by himself right now.

"...nhn…"

With sweats continue to flow down his pale face, Shao Cheng can feel the way his bones inside his body have started to break apart nonstop before it miraculously heals fast and turning into a rather abnormally strong and hard.

He was turning into some kind of monster, a rather abnormal human, as his entire body change from inside to outside to a befitting definition of an anomaly.

Although he will appear to be a normal human, Shao Cheng perfectly knew that he is an abnormal and unusual existence in this world, a total freak.

Is it worth it? Becoming into a monster, a mutated human being, and suffering all kinds of difficulty later on in the future?

Why not? Shao Cheng isn't normal to begin with, memories of a lifetime, transmigrating after dying, and living in a completely different world, so what is wrong with becoming strange this time?

Because of becoming scared about suffering and facing difficulty? In the end, isn't that what life is all about?

So it is worth it, Shao Cheng doesn't have any regret about his decision at all.

And if there is a day that he will regret his decision of exchanging an agreement to the land of Chang Empire in order to just find a certain person location, then just let him regret it, after all, when he accepted the deal with Purple in that fateful day, Shao Cheng doesn't have a single hesitation of what he has just done.

Shao Cheng is just walking another path on his new life once again and if it will turn out to be a wrong one with a miserable ending then at least, Shao Cheng can recognize with great confidence that he has chosen to walk this route on his life.

The promise that the man has fulfilled in the previous life, Shao Cheng is resolute to fulfill the promise that he exchange from him.

So with half-lidded eyes filled with great pain while hearing the constant craking sound of bones echoing on his ears as he places his forehead upon the crimson robe of the person that he has decided to follow in this life, only one thought running on his mind as he keeps himself wide awake.

Ren Yuan… be safe...

In another place, a man wearing just an inner crimson robe stops what he was currently doing before tilting his head to the side as he gazes deeply in a certain direction with a confused and complicated expression on his exquisite face while his heart skips a beat in an uncomfortable manner.

"...Whitey?"


クリエイターの想い
LoveableChubby LoveableChubby

Alright, I was planning some actions then it dwells at Shao Cheng inner thought of what he really thinks... O.O

Depressing but this is how I think Shao Cheng really feels about... especially his inner doubt to Ren Yuan actions... understandable to me though since only a few days of them being together... especially of what he knows about Ren Yuan personality that causes Shao Cheng to be skeptical about it hahaha

DISCORD: LoveableChubby#1263

https://discord.gg/2XXK28V

Anyway~ Mass Release This Week ^^

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