章 31: Cuddling

By the time light began streaming in through the slats in the blinds, Hazel had turned around to face Will in her sleep. She was pressed tightly against his chest with one of his arms slung over her torso and their legs were tangled together.

Startled fully awake from the close contact, she took this as an opportunity to examine her husband's face more closely. He looked perfectly at peace in his sleep. He even had a slight smile on his face that was far softer than his usual impish grin.

His dark blonde hair was sticking up in a few places as well and that helped make him look younger. Apparently, the factoid she had read about people looking younger when they were asleep was true.

How old was he, anyway? She had gotten a brief glimpse at his driver's license when they went to get their marriage license but his finger was covering the last digit of his birth date. She knew he had been born in the same decade as her but wasn't sure whether he was older or younger.

If she had to guess, Hazel would think Will was older simply because he was successful enough to buy his own house and car already. He had clearly spent more time working than she had.

Then again, she had never worked a full-time job. Back when her art wasn't enough to support her, she only worked part time at various campus jobs or restaurant chains. They had paid her bills but barely. She used her free time to continue her art in an effort to make a career out of it.

She examined his sleeping face closely by tilting her head up a little. Will was an attractive man but most of it came from his natural charisma rather than the handsomeness of his facial features. That being said, he was still cute.

As an artist she knew how to appreciate facial features though she usually wasn't romantically attracted to any. For Hazel it was all about the emotional connection. Billy Lawson had been fairly average as well but she had been drawn to him because of the bond she thought they had.

Would it be possible to forge an emotional connection with Will? He was very kind to her. Somehow that seemed to be the only thing he expected from her. He wanted her to feel like she could rely on him; she could tell.

But after so many years relying on herself, she wasn't sure she could open her heart up again. Every time she relied on someone, they inevitably let her down. Setting herself up for failure again would be stupid.

It was a pity because he seemed like he could be a really good friend if she gave him the chance. Hazel was too guarded for any meaningful friendship to happen. The friendly-but-not-close relationship they had now might be as good as it ever got.

Honestly, it was for the best. She wouldn't be able to leave if she became attached and it would be too ridiculous to spend the rest of her life with a stranger she had married out of desperation.

As guarded as Hazel was, she had nothing on Will. She had noticed how he always deflected questions about himself in favor of talking about her or something completely random. It was entirely possible he had a past he didn't want to talk about too.

She really couldn't blame him. Despite her curiosity about the kind of man she had married, she wasn't terribly interested in his past. Everyone was entitled to their privacy. It would be hypocritical to expect him to tell her things she wasn't willing to share personally.

Will slowly opened his eyes and smiled at her. "Good morning. No more nightmares?"

"No. Thanks for helping me go back to sleep. Think you can let go of me now though? I've been trapped for a while," Hazel said a bit sheepishly.

"…do I have to?"

She raised an eyebrow at him. Was he messing with her or what? Sometimes she honestly couldn't tell.

"Yes or we won't get anything done today."

"Eh, it's a Saturday. What is there to do?" he asked lazily.

A lot of things, okay?! She had heard there was a pond around here and wanted to see if it would be a good candidate for the scenery of her next landscape to put up inside the cabin. Plus she needed to make it into town to pick up a few things.

"Will," Hazel whined. "Let me go."

"You never cuddle with me when you're awake though. Five more minutes and I'll treat you to breakfast when we go into town this morning."

His offer was tempting. It had been a long time since she had enjoyed a fluffy pancake stack. Whatever. She had been trapped so long already; five more minutes wouldn't make a difference.

"Fine but I want pancakes. And bacon," she said firmly.

"Done," Will said with a grin as he pulled her closer.

Her heart beat uncomfortably in her chest. Though he had teased her before, it had never been like this. What did he want to cuddle her for? Wasn't he still hung up on somebody else?

He might be touch starved. Hazel had been like that when she first went to the mental hospital because she had been so used to her parents' little acts of affection like hugs and handholding.

Unlike in the middle of the night when she had thrived on the comfort, right now it felt awkward because Hazel had the strange feeling Will was very much enjoying holding her. She really didn't understand him. Sometimes she wondered if she ever would.

When he finally did release her, she practically sprinted to the bathroom before he could change his mind. She brushed her teeth furiously before heading back into the bedroom to grab an outfit and locking herself in the bathroom again.

Today she wore a white tee shirt with a pair of overall shorts and put her hair in a French braid, making sure to do her makeup so she didn't look even more like an oversized five-year-old. When she came out she saw that Will was dressed as casually as she was in a red tee shirt and cargo shorts.

"Ready to go?" he asked.

Hazel nodded as she rummaged through her dresser. "Yeah, I just need socks."

"Make sure you bring your purse too. You're driving today. You need to get used to the steep, winding roads around here."

Her heart filled with dread. Hazel hadn't driven on regular roads in over a year. How was she supposed to transition back into driving by tackling something more difficult?

"Do I have to?" she replied in a small voice.

Will patted the top of her head. "It'll be good practice. I'll be there with you the whole time."

He didn't really leave any room for argument. She put on her socks and sneakers without further complaint and followed him out to his four-wheel drive SUV apprehensively. This would be the biggest thing Hazel had ever driven.

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