章 37: Freedom

Belen numbly arrives as if her body unconsciously brought her home. She stops to take a deep breath before entering the house as the lights automatically turn on. Her anger has subsided for now, but something is weighing down deep in her heart. What could it be?

She takes a deep sigh while standing in the middle of the living room, solemnly staring at everything, her surroundings, stairs, walls, sofa, and television. It's as if she's forgotten the fact that she has everything. A successful business, lives in an expensive mansion with an unlimited amount of wealth and is involved in successful investments.

Ever since she was young, her mind was not the brightest, but she worked hard for her grades and talents to gain her father's attention and love. Sure, it was more than difficult for her to deal with emotionally, but she felt lonely even so. Her little brother was like a shining star that she could grasp, but as her star died, she was left with the dust and refused to let go.

She starts making herself a sandwich, though as silence falls within the house, only the sound of her making the sandwich is heard. She recalls the pictures of pretty much her family weighing down on her shoulders, like some invisible force that she wishes would go away.

Does she care about them? Is that what's bothering her? Or is it something deeper? She continuously sighs, "why is it always them…and Mabel too" she shakes her head, hoping to deny her feelings, "I hate them. I-I want to look away, but if I do. Should I expose them? Even if I were to, it'd only make me look bad."

When she's in a problematic situation, Belen tends to think things thoroughly, and when she does, the outcome is always a success. Though this time around, she does not know what to do and has the urge to call Noah.

But her stubborn personality does not let her cave in, or instead, she makes excuses like, "he's most likely enjoying his vacation, I shouldn't bother him."

What happened to the old Belen who didn't care about bothering anyone? This is different because it involves Noah, her best friend, whom she does not want to lose. It's going to take a lot more to break their friendship unless Noah says otherwise.

She finished making her sandwich and sits down at the table with a glass of water, "I thought this was the kind of life I wanted." She begins eating her simple sandwich recalling the past when her family all lived under one roof, a rare memory she has engraved within her mind.

She closed her eyes, pixel images form Ernestina rushing to get changed, "hurry! Go put on your shoes!" Ernestina turns, yelling at the other direction, "Mabel! Iris! Your dad will be here any minute now!"

Mabel scowls, "where are we going, anyway?"

Iris asks, "is it another one of his gatherings? They're boring! I don't want to go!"

"Ay! Ya, stop it! Your dad is getting off work early, and he's going to take us out to eat. Now come on, make sure to dress presentable."

Mabel rolls her eyes, "why, for the cameras?"

Iris scoffs, "aw man! Ma, I don't like it when the cameras are right in our faces! How can I eat?"

Ernestina scolds them, "I'm not asking you two if you want to go, I am telling you to get ready because we're going!"

The two sisters leave to their rooms annoyed at the fact that they're going to eat out. They're in their puberty stage and rarely want to go outside because of the constant cameras stalking their every move. As young teens, they felt creeped out and irritated, but they couldn't do anything.

Though for Belen since the moment she was born, she was already used to cameras, especially in the spotlight. While growing up, she always posed and would often imitate the way models walk. She even danced, played with her mother's make-up, and was often a curious cheery girl.

Her parents can say that, like every child, she was different, vibrant full of energy that was a little too much for her parents to handle, especially sassy like her mother. She'd often bump heads with her mother because she'd talk back and not listen. But when it came to her father, she was his obedient angel.

"Mabel! Iris! Your dad is already parked outside! Hurry!" she shouts loud enough for them to hear. Meanwhile, Belen is waiting by her side as she's changing Emiliano's clothes. She sighs, "Belen, baby, follow your sisters. Tell your dad I'll be right out, okay."

Belen walks away, following her sisters outside. Her face brightens upon seeing her dad waiting inside the van, "Papi!!!" she runs, passing her sisters. Her dad smiles upon seeing her too, "och!" he gets out of the car and carries her when Mabel and Iris both try to warmly greet him, "hi dad, where are we going?"

He puts Belen in the back seat, as Mabel and Iris take their designated seats in the middle. "Y tu mama? Where is she?"

Belen shouts, "she's coming!"

At that moment, Ernestina walks out, carrying Emiliano and placing him in the back next to Belen. "Ya?" Edy asks, "you guys aren't forgetting anything?"

Ernestina jokingly asks, "do you have your wallet?"

Though as they arrived at a restaurant and ate, it somehow did not satisfy their stomach. It left them feeling a bit empty, the food was delicious, but it was not what they wanted or had in mind.

This left Edy feeling awkward when in the car, he asks, "what did you guys think of the place?"

Mabel and Iris's exchange looks at whether or not they should say something. Ernestina speaks up, "truthfully, it wasn't what we wanted. I thought you were going to take us out to eat food!"

"but you all ate it!" Edy remarks.

She continues, "Pues si! What more were we supposed to do when that little piece of carne asada cost more than a box of pampers! Is it made out of gold of what?"

Edy feels the need to correct her, "its steak, that's what everyone is eating nowadays. Just ask the girls, I'm sure they'd agree with me."

Mabel sighs, "dad, can we get tacos or burritos next time? I don't know why you had to take us to such a boring place. It was too quiet they barely had any music on."

Iris bravely says, "Yeah, daddy. I thought we were going to eat at a Mexican restaurant they just opened, everyone in school has been talking about it."

His tone shifts, "that's only where poor people eat. We're not like them. Those restaurants aren't very hygiene. It can give you food poisoning. I heard from one of the directors that he once went to one and sued the place."

The three women roll their eyes at Edy when Ernestina looks out the window she notices a taco truck from afar, "Mira!" she points catching their attention, "Mira! Edy! Stop! we'll eat there."

He grunts, "no! it's already late, didn't you guys get full already?"

Suddenly Belen comments, "Mami, I'm still hungry."

"See! Belen and Emiliano were barely able to eat anything. Come on, just park right there. The girls and I will get down and order."

"Okay, but I don't have cash on me right now."

Ernestina rolls her eyes, getting out of the car, "fine, I have money, so don't worry, come on girls, what do you want Edy?"

He shakes his head, "I'm not hungry, I stopped for you guys. I don't want anything."

As she left, silence befalls when Edy sighs, Belen, asks, "Papi! Where did they go?" out of the blue scaring Edy because he forgot about them, "they left to get some food, they'll be right back, do you want me to put on music?"

She shouts, "yes, please!!" He puts cumbias when Belen's body twitches unknowingly to the sound of the music. Edy notices, "do you like this song?"

Belen happily nods, "yes!"

They come back, Ernestina is carrying the bag of food and tries to separate the aluminum foils to check, "Let's see, here you go, Mabel, with the carne asada, Iris you wanted chorizo, and pelon!"

Belen glares at him, "mama is calling you."

Mabel peeks over, "are you hungry, keebo?"

He shyly nods, "he is, mom!" Mabel shouts.

Ernestina softly shifts her tone, calling him gently, "come over here, sweetheart~ come over to mama~."

He gets out of his seat, walking to the front where his mom is seated, leaving Belen alone. Upon seeing this, Belen gets jealous when Ernestina nonchalantly passes the churros to Mabel to give to her. In reality, Belen was hungry for food, not just churros. She felt hurt.

The music was loud in the car, but it was as if they were all in their world enjoying themselves without her presence or bothering to check if whether she was eating or wanted something else.

This moment seemed to bother her a lot making her sulk and angry. It was as if no one paid attention to the back. Mabel and Iris were happily eating while bobbing their heads to the car music. Ernestina is feeding Emiliano as if he were a newborn baby when he could walk and eat independently. Edilberto, just sitting there on his phone. It doesn't matter, because he didn't bother to check on her either.

At one point, she couldn't listen to their conversation because of the loud music. But when she peeked over to glance at them laughing, she felt taken aback, wishing she knew what they were laughing at to join them. It sent her a shock wave of mixed emotions children aren't used to putting into words when she thinks aloud, "I don't belong here."

Belen opens her eyes to see herself sitting at the kitchen table with a half-eaten sandwich. She shakes her head, getting rid of that memory.

"What was I thinking?" her head hang while going up to her bedroom. She looks up to see her full, beautifully made bed unable to resist the urge to jump into its embrace.

"mmm," she smiles nuzzling into the pillow and blankets, "so soft and fluffy." She breathes a sigh of relief. Her immense delight is her bed. It feels like a giant hug, embracing her deeper and deeper into the warmth she lacks but wants the most.

Her worries disappeared all at once when she turns over, staring at the ceiling, "that's right. I don't belong there. I always felt that even though they call themselves family. They are nothing but parasites that want to take away everything I've worked so hard to get and take credit for…why God. Why was I born into such a family?"

She gets up to change into her nightgown, its unusual for Belen to be home during the nearing days of the board meetings. She's gotten used to barely sleeping or not coming home at all and staying at her office.

Having her face always plastered on the computer screen exhausts her the most, causing her significant headaches at the end of the day. The only place she can go to get some fresh air is the rooftop of A Star. But even that is not enough because what Belen wishes is to be free to roam around without the idea of cameras following her everywhere.

Luckily in her case, Belen is a 'rare being' as Noah describes because she does not attend parties, or spends money leisurely, involved in scandals, smokes, or does drugs. She doesn't even like drinking but a bit of wine. Her persona is different from what people take her to be, but at the same time, she has a hidden side to herself, which no one knows.

She turns side to side, trying to get comfortable on the bed when she takes out a tablet from underneath her pillow swiping up when classical music in low volume plays throughout the house. This is a way of relaxing her mind and helps her sleep faster.

Immediately her eyelids shut. She's consumed in a dream where she's wearing a beautiful white gown, walking outside underneath the full moon. A starry night, aloof, wearing a lost expression, walking barefooted near the rough old closed off well.

A tender smile forms on her face as her eyes soften, staring at the well, hopefully singing, "…some…day, my prince will come~." She gently grazes the well's rough exterior, "someday we'll meet~" she recalls her younger self asking her father, "Dad, I want a boyfriend, when will I get a boyfriend?"

Edy gently tilts his head, smiling, "you'll meet him when God wants you to."

He continues, "for now, why don't you ask God how you want your boyfriend to be? Pray to him, and wait patiently."

She continues to sing swiftly, enveloping the wind with her tender melancholy voice, "and away to his castle, I'll go…to be happy forever, I know…someday when spring is here, I'll find my love until…"

She sighs as her voice gives up, dithering, staring at the darkness within the well, "…never" she looks at her hands, noticing the rusty silver chains suppressing her movement, tying her down from her neck to her feet.

A tear reflecting the light of the moon rolls down her cheek, "I'm never…free," her eyes desperately look as if she's accepted her reality. The more she stares at the rough silver chains around her wrist, it's as if they're transparently digging its way down into her skin and bones. "It hurts," she quietly moans.

Suddenly a beautiful angelic male voice resonates within the wind carrying it to her ears. She desperately glances at the direction of the sound, wondering, "whose…?"

A gush of wind playfully swipes her hair, covering her eyes as the man continuously sings closely approaching, "now that I've found you~ Hear what I have to say~ Only for you…"

Belen frantically tries to move her hair from blocking her sight, when all she can see is the man's tender pink lips respectfully approach her with a handsome smile, "Belen…" he gracefully whispers, "I love you."

In that instant, she wakes up from the dream with her mouth open, eyes widened, unable to believe what she felt. She sits up facing her vanity mirror, staring at her reflection, at a loss for words. Stuttering, "w-why is m-my face r-r-red!!" she gasps, clapping her cheeks in the palm of her hands like a sandwich embarrassingly flushed, shrieking like a shy girl.

***

Meanwhile, Leena is on her way to work, Reuben hopped along, "did you call Everest?"

"No, why should I?" he casually replies, texting on his phone.

"Then who are you texting?" she raises an eyebrow.

"Your mother, of course! I want to know what she's doing."

She annoyingly rolls her eyes, "we just left the house 30 minutes ago, when will you stop looking after her?"

He sighs, "I have to keep her from running away. She's your mother, after all."

"But we don't need her, Everest and I are adults now. Papa, perhaps, do you still love her?"

"I do," he answers almost immediately.

"Everest's birthday passed, why don't you at least give him a call."

Reuben groans, "He's the one who decided to leave, he wants to disown himself, as far as I know, he's not my son."

She sighs, knowing she shouldn't continue but asks anyway, "mother is not necessary in our lives, Papa. You are the only one who wants her here."

Reuben calmly responds, "don't say that, you're starting to sound like Everest. Do you guys hate your mother that much? She gave birth to you two."

"But she's not the one who raised us, that's something we can never forget. What about you, dad? Can you truly love her knowing that fact?"

He looks away in denial, "you guys just don't understand yet. Just wait until you two get married then-"

"then I'll understand?" Leena scoffs, "as if! I know well enough that I won't treat my husband that way and vice versa."

Reuben laughs, "oh, I've got to warn him before marrying you, ahh Leena, how did you come out to be such an obedient daughter. I guess it's true what they say about your second child."

Leena asks, "what?"

He frowns, "ugh, they're the most problematic ones!"

Leena hesitates, "dad, between mother and um…Everest, who do you" she gets interrupted when Reuben answers a phone call.

After a few minutes, he hangs up, "what were you saying, Leena?"

"huh? Uh ah! Nothing, just wondering if"

"ah! That reminds me! How are your wedding plans coming along?" he asks excitedly.

She blinks, startled by his sudden question, "Ooh! Uh pretty well, actually everything is going smoothly. I'm going to fly overseas to meet him so we can choose a place to have the reception."

"and the invitations?"

She answers, "we just have to finalize the reception, and the invitations will be sent out."

He claps eagerly, "when will we meet his family? The wedding is next year. We should hurry up and meet them!"

"B-But, what if they want to meet us all? Including Everest."

He groans like a child, "damn, the only thing I can think of is finding a way to convince him."

"come on, dad! Why do you keep doing this to me?!"

"He listens to you! You're her favorite sister."

She side eyes him, "that's because I'm his ONLY sister!" Reuben laughs, but this is one of Leena's worries. Will Everest willingly attend her wedding?

***

Ding dong, "Hello?" Iris knocks when the door to a one-bedroom complex opens, "Mom? Why did you call me here? Is this where you live now?" she enters carefully but freezes, "M-Mabel? Oh my god!! Mabel?! Is that you?!" they hug. Watching this scene only makes Ernestina tear up when little footsteps approach her, Iris turns to the direction of the sound when Mabel gestures, "Iris, this is Emma, my daughter."

Iris can't contain her shock as her mouth widens, "this is your…" she gestures, turning back and forth to Mabel and Emma. And goes on her knees, pitching her voice highly, "Hi Emma!"

Mabel nods, "Emma, it's your tia. I told you about, remember on the plane? She's your tia Iris."

Emma turns to stare at Iris, holding out her arms for a hug, she wraps her fragile little arms around her shoulders. Iris silently fangirls, "she's soooo cute! Oh my gosh, Mabel! I swear she looks just like you!"

Emma runs to her mother's embrace. Iris curiously asks, "why is she carrying a white erase board?"

Mabel lets Emma down, "go play with your cousin Azaan. I'll call you two when the food is ready."

Iris panics, "Azaan is here? Man! Is this why you called me here, mom?"

Mabel feels awkward, "Emma can't talk. So, she writes what she wants to say."

Iris exaggeratedly gasps, "a-are you serious? Aww, poor Emma," she realizes, "where is he? You did get married, right? To the guy who you eloped with."

Mabel sighs, "its" she hesitates, "a little complicated, let's talk about that some other time. I'm just glad to see you finally, and to see Azaan too! He looks just like"

Iris interrupts her, "Mom, are you making posole?"

"Yes I am, Mabel said she wanted some, so I'm making it, you are going to stay and eat with us, right?"

"Well, duh!" she laughs, brightening up the ambient within the apartment. When Iris sighs, staring at Mabel, "what is it?"

Iris replies, "I can't believe you're here. Like finally! Are you going to see dad any time soon?"

"No! I don't want him to know I'm even here. Please don't say anything alright, Iris! Please!" Mabel begs.

Ernestina's complexion darkens, "oh, she won't." They both stare at her, "how do you know I won't?" Iris curiously asks.

Ernestina threatens her with a smile, "because if you do, I'll reveal to your dad that you've been smoking drugs."

Iris's eyes widen upon hearing Ernestina's claim, "t-that's so not true, where did you hear that mom?!" her eyebrows furrow in.

Mabel worriedly asks, "Is that true?"

Ernestina grins, "mhm! I saw you, Iris, don't try to hide it from me."

Iris annoyingly rolls her eyes, "shit, fine! Yes, I do! So what? Its legalized, so why do you guys act as if it were so wrong?"

Ernestina comments, "it's addictive! Look at you! Your face is so dry and ugly. It's pretty much sucking the life out of you! Right, Mabel!"

Mabel warily glances at them, "umm, I don't know. It's been years since I saw Iris."

"Ugh, see mom this is exactly why I didn't want to come, you always bother me about Azaan!"

"He's your son!"

Mabel calms them down, "okay mom, Iris lets just stop this already, it doesn't matter, I don't like threatening Iris to keep me being here a secret."

Iris calms her boiling blood, "All I know is that I won't tell my dad anything, it's not as if it matters anyway."

"What do you mean?"

"He hasn't been meeting with anyone since Belen stole A Star from under his nose."

Their eyes turn dangerous, "How could Belen have possibly stolen A Star from your dad?" Ernestina asks, unable to believe Iris's claims.

"I swear that little girl for reals gets on my nerves, she claims that my dad gave it to her as if it were no big deal saying that it's hers in the first place, but you're here now, you're going to take back A Star right Mabel?"

Mabel is speechless, "he gave everything? Like EVERYTHING? I can't believe he gave it up so easily. I remember he cared about the mall more than us."

Ernestina nods, "but Mabel does not want the mall. That's one of the reasons why she left."

Iris shockingly turns to Mabel, "really? But why? You'll get to have all that money!"

She laughs, "Iris, I don't care about that. I just want to help Emma talk right now, that's my main focus."

Ernestina shouts, "ya esta el posole, llaman a Emma y Azaan." She sets up the table with five bowls of posole with lemons and side dishes. Just as Ernestina sat down, she notices Mabel showing Emma how to blow on it and sees Azaan happily smiling to Iris while eating. What a lovely scene, Ernestina thinks to herself while eating when across from her, she notices an empty spot, her eyes turn somber, "If only you were here…Belen," a bitter smile forms on her face internally sighing but at the same time grateful for what she has.