章 8: Chapter Six
She blinks, speechless to everything I've just told her. Of course, I left out the bit with Ben, as well as the part of her death; I just couldn't bring myself to tell her. I think she can tell I'm leaving things out of my story by the skeptical look she gives me.
"Are you sure that's all?" She questions, clearly not convinced. I nod vigorously, not meeting her gaze in fear I'd spill my guts and tell her everything. "Alright," she folds her arms across her chest and nods, "alright." She puts on a calm, reassuring smile, her hands resting on my shoulder. "You've done a very brave thing." I can't help the tears that fills my eyes, her death flashing through my mind.
"Mother...I'm scared." She wipes my tears, her own beginning to overflow and leak out her eyes. Pulling me into a hug she kisses the top of my head.
"I know baby," she rocks me, swaying as I bury my head into her shoulder, holding onto her like she would slip out and never come back. "I know. Everything is going to be okay. I will go to Dimitri and we will stop it before it happens. The future isn't set in stone, Zmiena." I nod and she pulls away, a soft smile on my face as she wipes away my tears. "I'm going to go now, you go train, alright?" I nod and she brushes my hair back, kissing my forehead. "Good girl."
"Wait!" I grab her hand before she leaves and memorize every little detail about her face before she pulls away and walks over to Dimitri's home.
"Zmiena!" Ben's voice echoes across the field and my heart drops to my toes. He's the last person I want to talk to, especially right now. I don't look back and walk away, where to, I'm not sure. Anywhere but here will be perfect. I ignore his cries for me to stop, hating how much I long for him. "Zmiena, please." Ben grabs my wrist and pulls me away from people.
"Ben! Let me go! What are you doing?" He pulls me under a tree and pins me against the trunk. My hands tightly secured above my head.
"Not until you listen to me." I look away from him, furrowing my brow in anger, my lips sealed shut tightly, refusing to give into his wishes. "Look at me.." I shake my head and he rests his head onto my shoulder. "Look at me..listen to me dammit…" He lets go of my wrists and I shove him off me.
"Why should I? You used me Ben." I shake my head, tears filling my eyes. This time it's Ben that shakes his head. He grabs my shoulder, eyes locking onto mine, emotions swimming in them like a giant ocean lives in them.
"I just wanted you to confide in me. So I can help you, so I can protect you." I scoff and try to dig out that anger I earlier felt.
"You don't need to protect me," I look away from him once more and he gently cups my chin, turning my head so he can look at me with his captivating, enchanting gaze that cuts through my walls as if they were butter.
"I know, but I want to." Just like that I'm putty in his hands, anger forgotten. As long as he keeps looking at me, as if I'm the crown jewel, I don't care what he does. "Zmiena," his eyes fall down to my lips. He leans in closer, achingly slow. I gently cup his cheek and close the distance between us, pressing my lips against his. Ben groans in approval and runs his fingers through my hair. The kiss deepens and his hands roam down to my hips, teeth pulling at my bottom lip. His hands go to the back of my thighs and he picks me up, my legs wrapping around his waist as I'm pressed against the tree.
Ben's lips move from mine to my neck and from my neck to my shoulder. He pushes down the strap and kisses back up to my neck, gently sucking on the flesh. I moan in pleasure, my fingers roaming through his hair as I close my eyes. "Ben," a voice cracks, it's pitch raising. That's not my voice. My eyes slowly open to see Samantha standing just ahead of us, full view of the entire scene that just happened.
"Shit," Ben whispers quietly, letting me to the ground as he turns to face her. "Samantha," she walks straight up to him and slaps him across the face, a loud smack resounding the air.
"Hey!" My eyes widen and I grab her hand before she can strike again. "What do you think you are doing? You are out of line!" She rips her hand out of my grip and scoffs.
"Do you want to tell her? Or should I?" She takes a step back, tears streaming down her face as she wraps her arms around herself in a comforting manner.
"Tell me what?" I question hesitantly, turning to Ben. My heart begins beating erratically, the look crossing his face doing nothing to soothe my nerves.
"Zmiena. I love you, you know that, right?" He takes my hand and I give a nervous smile. I can feel Samantha's rage filling the air with every word he speaks. Even more I can see it. She grabs Ben by the collar and shoves him against the tree I was just having one of the greatest moments of my life on just a few seconds ago.
"Stop lying, Ben!" I watch Samantha with widened eyes. She's our village's best fighter. Despite her muscular frame she's petite. Ben easily takes control and grabs her wrist, swinging her legs out from under her and forcing her to the ground. I can only watch on in shock at the scene happening before me. I don't know if I should stop it or let it happen.
"I'm not lying, now calm down!" He pins her arms above her head as she cries, squirming under him like a fish out of water.
"Tell her! Tell her how you've taken me to bed not once, but multiple times, for years. Tell her how you got me pregnant!" She cries out and I can feel my everything stop. My heart stops beating, the world stops spinning. Ben and I have the same reaction.
"What?" I stumble back, Ben just blinks. Samantha shoves him off her and laughs.
"That's right, I'm pregnant, the baby is yours." No, this can't be happening. It's not possible. I shake my head, my heart shattering into pieces and each piece getting stabbed with a knife made especially for it.
"No…" my voice snaps Ben out of whatever trance he was in and he looks up at me. He scrambles to his feet.
"Zmiena," I cover my mouth with my hand, tears streaming down my face. I just shake my head, stumbling back as he tries to approach me. I can't say anything. There's nothing to say. So I do the first thing I can think, run. I run fast and I run hard, angry tears cascading down my face like waterfalls.
I arrive at my house and stumble in, when the door shuts my legs give out and I collapse. Time passes, hours, minutes, who knows, time doesn't matter to me anymore as I sit here, Samantha's words repeating continuously through my head like a broken record. Pregnant. Ben got her pregnant.
After so much time passes, I force myself on wobbly feet and stumble to my room. When I see my bed the urge to breakdown consumes me.
There's no point in fighting it. The one person I've ever loved got someone pregnant. I collapse into bed and repeat the entire process. Wondering what I did wrong, second guessing every choice I've made over the years until eventually I just fall asleep.
I groan softly, heat kissing my body as if a thousand suns fill my room. The smell of smoke filling my lungs. Blinking my eyes open rapidly the scene before me must have been taken right out of hell; my home is on fire.
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