章 6: The Downfall
It was dusk of the july . I finished my evening tea and snacks on the familiar. I turned my attention towards the wall. That wall often give me feels of a bird kept in a cage. from the day I enter this school, my heart always wants to defy this boundary.
This first time I defies this wall was a breathtaking experience, it can't be expressed through the words. It is one of things that can be known only through living that moment. One thing I can surely tell that it gives you goosebumps more than riding a rollercoster and surely your ears will witness the heartbeats at its peak of pace.
But, Now its a cup of tea not for only me for the lions share of seniour hostel boys.
And I am bit of anxious , as my mind seeking for the doze of adhesive I am addicted to. So in a impulsive manner of urge to consume the substance, I infiltrate my house. Then I puts up a pair canvas shoes on my feet. Then I ran towards the wall in a moderate pace and quickly vanished from the boundary of school by crawling over the wireless part of the wall. Thanks to the unknown seniours to clear the wires on that part.
Apart from the need of the adeshive. The natural beauty of the village often calling me to embrace its fragrance that possibly only a fond of the nature can smell. its narrow bouloverd of only soil on top alongwith the trees stand by the both side of road, often shed shadow to the living beings walked upon on the lane. In brief a picture perfect typical Assamese village. Though I do not have a camera or Multimedia phone with me. But I captured the beauty of the village in my heart.
So most of the time I choose late afternoon or dusk to walked upon the village's soil.
My feet stopped at the tiny retail shop which is my obvious destination .
one hour later
I found myself in the terrace again, with the plastic filled with adhesive. I am fully into the
drugges state of my mind. But I begin to sense someone is staring at me for a while. I gathered the courage and look back into that person. " Holy shit its bull dog"
As my sense working partially at that I barely heard the words thrown at me. But I am aware of being dragged and possibly few slappes on my left cheek I can feel.
I didn't remeber how come I arrived at the principal's chamber. Only thing I remember from that place, is the last words from came out from the principal " Ask him to pack his backpack and ask his parents to take him home tommorow morning ten o clock sharp. "
As I come back to hostel around ten o clock night. I gradually came back to my senses. Well then my mind begins to give a taste of what is called traumatizing. My heads running through termondous pressure of uncerteinity. Uncerteinity of possible reactions of my parents and uncerteinity of my school life. Am i going to be a dropout or have to go through a suspension period.
When happiness come to one's life, time feels like very brief. But when we have a downfall every seconds feel like an hour.
Even though I have been sceptic through my life, At this moment I begun to pray to almighty that " Do not let the tommorow come to my life. I don't think I have strength to stand against the things tommorow's dawn might through at me. "
Although I know its utterly foolish to think like that...
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