Reviews of Queen Lyn: Clash Of Kingdoms by XOMatsumaeohana - Webnovel

48レビュー

4.75

  • テキストの品質
  • アップデートの安定性
  • ストーリー展開
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  • 世界の背景

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Mutoumiwa_T

A hidden gem 😭😭😭 I didn't know you had a story like this author. It's written well, and has a different vibe from your other stories. 😲😍😍 I love it so much

2yr
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kikuranatsume

One of the better written fantasy romance novels in this platform. I like how this author doesn't use the usual cliche troupes, and writes such unique stories.

2yr
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Happy_girl

Not a huge fantasy fan but this series is great. I'll be sure to check out the first book too author. Lyn and Rhys are my favourite characters.

2yr
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XOMatsumaeohana

Updated review Although this book will be placed on hold until further notice. I do believe it is one of my better written, better structured/planned books. Please join the Lyn series journey. - XOMatsumaeohana

2yr
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Ms_Anonymous

I never read novels from this genre but after I read this novel I thought I can give it try. The plot is a little difficult and different from others which I had read. Normally I won't give reviews to the books I don't like but this book is awesome. If anyone wanna try this book to read I can simply say it is a perfect choice. But I suggest the author proofread the chaps before releasing a chap as there are minor mistakes( which are actually unnoticeable). I wish all the best to the author for her work.

4yr
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RandomchaoS

This story is well written with only a few grammar issues, and some spelling errors. The plot seems to be well planned and carried out, and the use of descriptors is wonderful. If you are worried about updates, the author just recently came back from hiatus, but if you take the number of days between the first and last chapter when they were updating regularly (February 17, 2019 and October 4 2019)(229), divide that by 7 (to find weeks) which roughly equals 33, and then divide the number of chapters (124) by 33 you get that the author was updating approximately 4 chapters per week. (I rounded up on numbers, so it's not the exact amount.)

4yr
0 の返信を表示する
KyphrAce18

Woah seems like a good story gonna add this to my library weehhhh New romance and war like it very much😊😊 Is this a love triangle story and betrayal woah another one😊

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
phoenix_8888

The story is young yet, but I like what I am reading so far. This is the second of a series of the FL from girlhood to womanhood and those events and people around her. This can be read independent of the first, however personally I wish that one had a general idea as to where one ends to the other starting. Although I did not mind reading the first one, I prefer this one a bit more and am looking forward to reading more chapters. Hopefully author the chapters for the stories are not endless. I understand there is a third one which to me would be the final of this story and is not yet publish. Looking forward to that as well. This novel will remain in my library for now. Good luck.

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
zetsubouaichan

I have read the author's other work, Dream Star, and I honestly like this story more. The story and plot were interesting. The writing flew nicely, and it keeps me wanting to read more to see where the story is going. I love that the author focused this story on the Queen, while not forgetting the side characters as well. I want to know more about Queen Lyn and the people around her. And what is it about the king? There were a few spelling errors, but that does not affect my reading experience. My only complaint is that sometimes the long paragraph hurt my eyes as I was reading through my small screen phone. It's okay if I'm reading through my computer though.

5yr
1 の返信を表示する
Rxel
LV 15 Badge

Lovely to read through. As far as I can tell, there were little to no errors that were particularly glaring that disrupted the flow of reading. The Author writes with care and imagery that leaves me wanting to read more. The descriptive imagery made it easy for me to immerse myself in the story. Keep up the good work, Author! Eagerly waiting for more. 😆🎉

5yr
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dusty_angel

Sorry for the late review! I’ve been a bit busy these past few days. Please forgive this lowly one. I have so many review swaps in queue now. orz Anyways, back to business! Writing Quality: 4/5 Overall, the writing and grammar is pretty good. There are only a few things I want to point out. The author needs to keep the verb tenses consistent. Most of the time, she uses past tense, but then she switches to present tense sometimes. The author also needs to capitalize plural nouns such as Snow Kingdom and Queen of Snow. Sometimes they are capitalized, sometimes they aren’t. Update Stability: 5/5 Nothing to complain here. As a writer myself, I admire how often the author is able to update! Keep up the good work! Story Development: 5/5 The pacing of the story isn’t too fast or too slow. There is a sense of mystery behind the story. Me likey. Character Design: 4/5 The character dialogues are very natural, and the interactions are very authentic. I would like some more imagery though. It was kind d hard to create an image of each character with just dialogue. World Background: 4/5 I’m still kind of vague about the history from the world, but it is slowly unfolding as the plot plays out. I’m interested in learning more about the world.

5yr
1 の返信を表示する
Good_Light_Sleep

First off the pacing is a bit too slow for my liking but that is maybe because I mostly read and write action novels, for others this won't be an issue. The characters is the one that saved the novel for me, their relationships and interaction with each other is flesh out. Nice novel, good job. :D

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
Bikash2410

The character is well described with her actions and i like your grammar..... I can't wait to read further....do update chapter fast..Good luck and wish you best of luck

5yr
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K_A_U
LV 3 Badge

Really nice book, I'm really enjoying the story so far. I like Miley, she's tough and fierce.. The Queen is also a great character, I like the way she rules her people with wisdom. I like this book and I want to see how it ends. I'm going to follow it to the END.

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
MisterE05

The intro definetly sounds professional and even gave me ideas on improvement of my own. at this rate you should tutour people lol. The Character introduction for sure proves useful. It's nice to get a short view of characters before the official story. "Before the storm(1) I noticed that you wrote "A Kingdom that its neither known for its riches or customs." I see a issue here. For example the word "Neither" reffers to something that isn't. Basically you are saying that the Kingdom isn't known for it's riches and customs. But further in, it says that the kingdom is known for both. Correct me if i'm wrong but you should use "either" instead of "Neither". Clever world built, not overdone and not under done either. Surprised how workers below her status speak freely. Or isn't the queen the type that rules with an iron fist?😂 The Kingdom names however feel like they could use a bit of work. I don't feel the name "Kingdom of snow" to much. If the Kingdom is based on snow or anything snow related in that manner, try names like "Frozen Gate Kingdom, or White ice Kingdom, or Frostbite Kingdom. Etc etc. Adds more excitement. You could try using google translate and use the Latin Language. It gives great medieveal translations. Before the storm(2) I don't see any issues at this part. It's perfection. The world build proceeds being one of a kind, the characters show much of their personality which gives a better view on how they are like. It's simply perfection. Before the storm(3) So far i did notice that each scene is a bit to short to the part where you have to start a new scene two or three times in one part by using ------------------------------------------- Try being a bit more creative. Think of more content to add on each scene and be more and more descriptive about them. Overall what i've read so far is great content and i do recomment it to any people looking for Kingdom Build stories. As this one is a 5/5

5yr
4 の返信を表示する
Missbrie

I totally see what you mean about setting a scene by your writing! Its very clear where the characters are but also allows the reader to use a bit of imagination. So far I am liking the way you are introducing the relationships so the reader can understand the links between the characters. The writing flows nicely and is easy to read. Adding this to an interesting story line pushes the reader to want to read more. I also like how the readers engage with you and even the characters in the comments. I think, from what I have read so far you are a great author and I would gladly continue to read your books. :)

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
ILLYAchan

I like the story! It's good to read since it has a good plot and very few grammatical errors. I read up to 3 chapters already and will continue reading it. (Curious who is her king)

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
withlovetale

Queen snow. John snow... Im sorry i cant stop saying that...lol..You are really good and i like the story line. Reading it is like snow sliding down a hill smoothly. Keep it up

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
stella2138

this story is brilliant and i hope author keeps writing more. here are the stars my system gave me ********************************************************************************. i hope you'll accept them.

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
JoannaAngel05

So many interesting stories popping out on WEBNOVEL this days that I can't get enough of it. An interesting story that I will be suggesting to everyone here on WEBNOVEL... Giving it a 5⭐️ because it deserves more than that... Keep up the good work author.

5yr
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Alaheeza

I loved the book! So far so good! The background of the story is pretty amazing and I can't wait for more chapters to release! The characters are well explained and the story writing quality is also pretty good!

5yr
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Nzoputa

I'm just in chapter 7 but so far the book seems really good. I like the Miley character she reminds me of someone I know. The Queen also seems to be really wise but unsure about something. I like this book and I want to see how it ends.

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
noctifer

I'm only halfway right now but I have GOT TO GIVE THIS AMAZING STORY A REVIEW!! The writing quality is superb, albiet for a couple of grammatical mistakes. How do you update so much even with another story?? Like, daily updates thank u very much. I'm definitely going to keep up with this novel ^^ I'm very curious about Lyn and J's friendship. As well as why Lyn didn't marry Allen, who she was raised to marry?? If i'm correct oof. Overall, a very descriptive novel. MC is strong and can obviously fight for what she wants instead of being constantly rescued. A very unique premise, especially the focus on Lyn and J's relationship in a romance fiction genre. It makes this story stand out, which is a good thing. Keep on writing, dear author!

5yr
2 の返信を表示する
cloudgugu

I love the concept of this novel. A female ruler. I'm a sucker for strong woman like Queen Lyn. I found her character really relatable. The language of this novel to me is really good. I understood what the author wanted to convey. The update is stable. The characters are really good and well designed. Good job author! 😍

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
PsyberRose

This is a unique fantasy story. Personally, I find the story is entertaining and captivating. If you like the sort of adventure / magic / strong FL and a little bit of romance, then this is the novel for you. Writing Quality: 5* as it is easy and pleasant to read. English isn't my first language, so any mistakes are negligible and I can't see any either. Stability of Updates: 5* in good faith. This is Author's 2nd novel that is being written concurrently with another, so the number is quite good in itself. Story Development: It's good. It started off slow and initially, the writing style took some getting used to. That is more of a personal issue rather than anything wrong with Author's style. Instead of one continuous time flow, it jumps from one person to another, or the past then to the present. It's interesting to see how the little mysteries and backstories get revealed bit by bit. Character Design: Good, in-depth and all are human. You can connect to them. Personally, I like Lan. World Background: A fantasy setting, which can be difficult to carry out and portray. Author has done a wonderful job in that.

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
DriftingCloud123

In my opinion, the strongest point of this story is the writing quality. There are some grammar issues, but to me, the quality of the writing is more about how the author expresses him/herself. And that is done very well and gives the novel a good flow. This makes it feel like the story is constantly developing and manages to keep you entertained even with the slow pace it has from the beginning. There's only one piece of advice I would give the author for this fiction. This is something that others may not care, it's like a personal reason. And my advice is to name the characters properly or do not name them at all. I totally understand why you would not give a minor side character a name ( like captain R for example), but if you are gonna put just a single letter then don't name them at all. When Allen is leaving the kingdom instead of saying captain R he could have just said, 'thank you, Captain.' And with the Queen J is even worse because she is an important character. Even if the name is later revealed, at the moment I read it like that, it takes me out of that fantastic story you had made and reminds me, I am just reading (the immersion is ruined). You could just have called her the Snow Queen or whatever, but Queen J is like you gave up halfway through naming her. Again, this is something that's possible it bothers me alone, and other people may find it just fine. It is just my opinion and it is not that of a big deal but it hinders my lecture. The world building could be more detailed, but I'm still at chapter 15 so, there may be more in the following chapters. Except for those two remarks the story is great and I will keep reading.

5yr
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yunisao
LV 13 Badge

[This review is part of a review swap] Wow! This novel is amazing. The grammar is almost perfect which is really refreshing. I’m sure that this story will climb the rankings quickly! The pacing isn’t too quick and the way the author wrote the world background, characters, and events makes it seem like your watching a movie.

5yr
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PeachyPearl

I started reading this one as a part of review swap, but as I read more chapters, I'm like "What were you busy with all this time that you haven't read this fascinating and amazing novel until now?" It's one of the awesome novels I have read on WN. I'm completely hooked. Keep it coming author. And this one stays in my library to not miss any updates. 😍

5yr
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Veronica8

This story has a high fantasy feel of sovereign politics and test of loyalties. I like how the story went straight to the challenges and back stories were revealed as it went on through the eyes of each character. I think I enjoyed Allen's character the most. He left the most impression in my mind. This is my perspective, so please take it with a grain of salt. I did struggle with the story's pace, finding it a bit too fast; like a transfer student who has to hit the ground running and know everything in a snap. There was so much going on in the first few chapters with characters thrown in without much lead-in and then taken out of the picture. It was too much to digest. I had problems grounding myself to the main character. At times, I thought I finally saw Lyn (like when she thought of Allen) only to be taken back to a surface level of her again (stance on war). If that was the intention then it played off well. Regarding the other characters, there wasn't a lot of detail quirks that made them really sink-in distinctly in my mind. I felt because of the fast pace, the characters' first impressions were fleeting. Sure characters should develop as you go, but they also need to have key quirks given up front, so a ****** reader like myself can instantly identify with. I reread chapters to be sure I wasn't missing anything. An example is the first impression of Uncle Albert, if more of his mannerism's and description of his physical attributes to match his views were shown, I would have an image of him locked into my mind. At the most, I thought of him as some grumbling NPC. Out of all the characters, Miley and Allen were the two that stuck around my mind for their personalities. I really enjoyed Allen's character. He can be my man any day XD. The world design wouldn't hurt with a bit more lore about the kingdoms through some mannerisms of people from the different regions maybe. All in all, this is an intriguing story with a lot of potential and definitely one for fantasy readers to enjoy. Thanks for sharing. Keep writing.

5yr
2 の返信を表示する
OANNO
LV 13 Badge

For a random idea (looked at other reviews) this story is very well written. I like how we just get to the point of the story rather than a slow build up. The authors writing style is good too, it's not excellent but it's one of the better ones grammar wise on WN. Only a few typos here and there. Authors characters are well developed too, for the main cast and even side characters it appears like we are getting mini arcs on them.

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
Mutoumiwa_T

A hidden gem 😭😭😭 I didn't know you had a story like this author. It's written well, and has a different vibe from your other stories. 😲😍😍 I love it so much

2yr
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kikuranatsume

One of the better written fantasy romance novels in this platform. I like how this author doesn't use the usual cliche troupes, and writes such unique stories.

2yr
0 の返信を表示する
Happy_girl

Not a huge fantasy fan but this series is great. I'll be sure to check out the first book too author. Lyn and Rhys are my favourite characters.

2yr
0 の返信を表示する
XOMatsumaeohana

Updated review Although this book will be placed on hold until further notice. I do believe it is one of my better written, better structured/planned books. Please join the Lyn series journey. - XOMatsumaeohana

2yr
0 の返信を表示する
Ms_Anonymous

I never read novels from this genre but after I read this novel I thought I can give it try. The plot is a little difficult and different from others which I had read. Normally I won't give reviews to the books I don't like but this book is awesome. If anyone wanna try this book to read I can simply say it is a perfect choice. But I suggest the author proofread the chaps before releasing a chap as there are minor mistakes( which are actually unnoticeable). I wish all the best to the author for her work.

4yr
0 の返信を表示する
RandomchaoS

This story is well written with only a few grammar issues, and some spelling errors. The plot seems to be well planned and carried out, and the use of descriptors is wonderful. If you are worried about updates, the author just recently came back from hiatus, but if you take the number of days between the first and last chapter when they were updating regularly (February 17, 2019 and October 4 2019)(229), divide that by 7 (to find weeks) which roughly equals 33, and then divide the number of chapters (124) by 33 you get that the author was updating approximately 4 chapters per week. (I rounded up on numbers, so it's not the exact amount.)

4yr
0 の返信を表示する
KyphrAce18

Woah seems like a good story gonna add this to my library weehhhh New romance and war like it very much😊😊 Is this a love triangle story and betrayal woah another one😊

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
phoenix_8888

The story is young yet, but I like what I am reading so far. This is the second of a series of the FL from girlhood to womanhood and those events and people around her. This can be read independent of the first, however personally I wish that one had a general idea as to where one ends to the other starting. Although I did not mind reading the first one, I prefer this one a bit more and am looking forward to reading more chapters. Hopefully author the chapters for the stories are not endless. I understand there is a third one which to me would be the final of this story and is not yet publish. Looking forward to that as well. This novel will remain in my library for now. Good luck.

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
zetsubouaichan

I have read the author's other work, Dream Star, and I honestly like this story more. The story and plot were interesting. The writing flew nicely, and it keeps me wanting to read more to see where the story is going. I love that the author focused this story on the Queen, while not forgetting the side characters as well. I want to know more about Queen Lyn and the people around her. And what is it about the king? There were a few spelling errors, but that does not affect my reading experience. My only complaint is that sometimes the long paragraph hurt my eyes as I was reading through my small screen phone. It's okay if I'm reading through my computer though.

5yr
1 の返信を表示する
Rxel
LV 15 Badge

Lovely to read through. As far as I can tell, there were little to no errors that were particularly glaring that disrupted the flow of reading. The Author writes with care and imagery that leaves me wanting to read more. The descriptive imagery made it easy for me to immerse myself in the story. Keep up the good work, Author! Eagerly waiting for more. 😆🎉

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
dusty_angel

Sorry for the late review! I’ve been a bit busy these past few days. Please forgive this lowly one. I have so many review swaps in queue now. orz Anyways, back to business! Writing Quality: 4/5 Overall, the writing and grammar is pretty good. There are only a few things I want to point out. The author needs to keep the verb tenses consistent. Most of the time, she uses past tense, but then she switches to present tense sometimes. The author also needs to capitalize plural nouns such as Snow Kingdom and Queen of Snow. Sometimes they are capitalized, sometimes they aren’t. Update Stability: 5/5 Nothing to complain here. As a writer myself, I admire how often the author is able to update! Keep up the good work! Story Development: 5/5 The pacing of the story isn’t too fast or too slow. There is a sense of mystery behind the story. Me likey. Character Design: 4/5 The character dialogues are very natural, and the interactions are very authentic. I would like some more imagery though. It was kind d hard to create an image of each character with just dialogue. World Background: 4/5 I’m still kind of vague about the history from the world, but it is slowly unfolding as the plot plays out. I’m interested in learning more about the world.

5yr
1 の返信を表示する
Good_Light_Sleep

First off the pacing is a bit too slow for my liking but that is maybe because I mostly read and write action novels, for others this won't be an issue. The characters is the one that saved the novel for me, their relationships and interaction with each other is flesh out. Nice novel, good job. :D

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
Bikash2410

The character is well described with her actions and i like your grammar..... I can't wait to read further....do update chapter fast..Good luck and wish you best of luck

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
K_A_U
LV 3 Badge

Really nice book, I'm really enjoying the story so far. I like Miley, she's tough and fierce.. The Queen is also a great character, I like the way she rules her people with wisdom. I like this book and I want to see how it ends. I'm going to follow it to the END.

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
MisterE05

The intro definetly sounds professional and even gave me ideas on improvement of my own. at this rate you should tutour people lol. The Character introduction for sure proves useful. It's nice to get a short view of characters before the official story. "Before the storm(1) I noticed that you wrote "A Kingdom that its neither known for its riches or customs." I see a issue here. For example the word "Neither" reffers to something that isn't. Basically you are saying that the Kingdom isn't known for it's riches and customs. But further in, it says that the kingdom is known for both. Correct me if i'm wrong but you should use "either" instead of "Neither". Clever world built, not overdone and not under done either. Surprised how workers below her status speak freely. Or isn't the queen the type that rules with an iron fist?😂 The Kingdom names however feel like they could use a bit of work. I don't feel the name "Kingdom of snow" to much. If the Kingdom is based on snow or anything snow related in that manner, try names like "Frozen Gate Kingdom, or White ice Kingdom, or Frostbite Kingdom. Etc etc. Adds more excitement. You could try using google translate and use the Latin Language. It gives great medieveal translations. Before the storm(2) I don't see any issues at this part. It's perfection. The world build proceeds being one of a kind, the characters show much of their personality which gives a better view on how they are like. It's simply perfection. Before the storm(3) So far i did notice that each scene is a bit to short to the part where you have to start a new scene two or three times in one part by using ------------------------------------------- Try being a bit more creative. Think of more content to add on each scene and be more and more descriptive about them. Overall what i've read so far is great content and i do recomment it to any people looking for Kingdom Build stories. As this one is a 5/5

5yr
4 の返信を表示する
Missbrie

I totally see what you mean about setting a scene by your writing! Its very clear where the characters are but also allows the reader to use a bit of imagination. So far I am liking the way you are introducing the relationships so the reader can understand the links between the characters. The writing flows nicely and is easy to read. Adding this to an interesting story line pushes the reader to want to read more. I also like how the readers engage with you and even the characters in the comments. I think, from what I have read so far you are a great author and I would gladly continue to read your books. :)

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
ILLYAchan

I like the story! It's good to read since it has a good plot and very few grammatical errors. I read up to 3 chapters already and will continue reading it. (Curious who is her king)

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
withlovetale

Queen snow. John snow... Im sorry i cant stop saying that...lol..You are really good and i like the story line. Reading it is like snow sliding down a hill smoothly. Keep it up

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
stella2138

this story is brilliant and i hope author keeps writing more. here are the stars my system gave me ********************************************************************************. i hope you'll accept them.

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
JoannaAngel05

So many interesting stories popping out on WEBNOVEL this days that I can't get enough of it. An interesting story that I will be suggesting to everyone here on WEBNOVEL... Giving it a 5⭐️ because it deserves more than that... Keep up the good work author.

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
Alaheeza

I loved the book! So far so good! The background of the story is pretty amazing and I can't wait for more chapters to release! The characters are well explained and the story writing quality is also pretty good!

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
Nzoputa

I'm just in chapter 7 but so far the book seems really good. I like the Miley character she reminds me of someone I know. The Queen also seems to be really wise but unsure about something. I like this book and I want to see how it ends.

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
noctifer

I'm only halfway right now but I have GOT TO GIVE THIS AMAZING STORY A REVIEW!! The writing quality is superb, albiet for a couple of grammatical mistakes. How do you update so much even with another story?? Like, daily updates thank u very much. I'm definitely going to keep up with this novel ^^ I'm very curious about Lyn and J's friendship. As well as why Lyn didn't marry Allen, who she was raised to marry?? If i'm correct oof. Overall, a very descriptive novel. MC is strong and can obviously fight for what she wants instead of being constantly rescued. A very unique premise, especially the focus on Lyn and J's relationship in a romance fiction genre. It makes this story stand out, which is a good thing. Keep on writing, dear author!

5yr
2 の返信を表示する
cloudgugu

I love the concept of this novel. A female ruler. I'm a sucker for strong woman like Queen Lyn. I found her character really relatable. The language of this novel to me is really good. I understood what the author wanted to convey. The update is stable. The characters are really good and well designed. Good job author! 😍

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
PsyberRose

This is a unique fantasy story. Personally, I find the story is entertaining and captivating. If you like the sort of adventure / magic / strong FL and a little bit of romance, then this is the novel for you. Writing Quality: 5* as it is easy and pleasant to read. English isn't my first language, so any mistakes are negligible and I can't see any either. Stability of Updates: 5* in good faith. This is Author's 2nd novel that is being written concurrently with another, so the number is quite good in itself. Story Development: It's good. It started off slow and initially, the writing style took some getting used to. That is more of a personal issue rather than anything wrong with Author's style. Instead of one continuous time flow, it jumps from one person to another, or the past then to the present. It's interesting to see how the little mysteries and backstories get revealed bit by bit. Character Design: Good, in-depth and all are human. You can connect to them. Personally, I like Lan. World Background: A fantasy setting, which can be difficult to carry out and portray. Author has done a wonderful job in that.

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
DriftingCloud123

In my opinion, the strongest point of this story is the writing quality. There are some grammar issues, but to me, the quality of the writing is more about how the author expresses him/herself. And that is done very well and gives the novel a good flow. This makes it feel like the story is constantly developing and manages to keep you entertained even with the slow pace it has from the beginning. There's only one piece of advice I would give the author for this fiction. This is something that others may not care, it's like a personal reason. And my advice is to name the characters properly or do not name them at all. I totally understand why you would not give a minor side character a name ( like captain R for example), but if you are gonna put just a single letter then don't name them at all. When Allen is leaving the kingdom instead of saying captain R he could have just said, 'thank you, Captain.' And with the Queen J is even worse because she is an important character. Even if the name is later revealed, at the moment I read it like that, it takes me out of that fantastic story you had made and reminds me, I am just reading (the immersion is ruined). You could just have called her the Snow Queen or whatever, but Queen J is like you gave up halfway through naming her. Again, this is something that's possible it bothers me alone, and other people may find it just fine. It is just my opinion and it is not that of a big deal but it hinders my lecture. The world building could be more detailed, but I'm still at chapter 15 so, there may be more in the following chapters. Except for those two remarks the story is great and I will keep reading.

5yr
0 の返信を表示する
yunisao
LV 13 Badge

[This review is part of a review swap] Wow! This novel is amazing. The grammar is almost perfect which is really refreshing. I’m sure that this story will climb the rankings quickly! The pacing isn’t too quick and the way the author wrote the world background, characters, and events makes it seem like your watching a movie.

5yr
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PeachyPearl

I started reading this one as a part of review swap, but as I read more chapters, I'm like "What were you busy with all this time that you haven't read this fascinating and amazing novel until now?" It's one of the awesome novels I have read on WN. I'm completely hooked. Keep it coming author. And this one stays in my library to not miss any updates. 😍

5yr
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Veronica8

This story has a high fantasy feel of sovereign politics and test of loyalties. I like how the story went straight to the challenges and back stories were revealed as it went on through the eyes of each character. I think I enjoyed Allen's character the most. He left the most impression in my mind. This is my perspective, so please take it with a grain of salt. I did struggle with the story's pace, finding it a bit too fast; like a transfer student who has to hit the ground running and know everything in a snap. There was so much going on in the first few chapters with characters thrown in without much lead-in and then taken out of the picture. It was too much to digest. I had problems grounding myself to the main character. At times, I thought I finally saw Lyn (like when she thought of Allen) only to be taken back to a surface level of her again (stance on war). If that was the intention then it played off well. Regarding the other characters, there wasn't a lot of detail quirks that made them really sink-in distinctly in my mind. I felt because of the fast pace, the characters' first impressions were fleeting. Sure characters should develop as you go, but they also need to have key quirks given up front, so a ****** reader like myself can instantly identify with. I reread chapters to be sure I wasn't missing anything. An example is the first impression of Uncle Albert, if more of his mannerism's and description of his physical attributes to match his views were shown, I would have an image of him locked into my mind. At the most, I thought of him as some grumbling NPC. Out of all the characters, Miley and Allen were the two that stuck around my mind for their personalities. I really enjoyed Allen's character. He can be my man any day XD. The world design wouldn't hurt with a bit more lore about the kingdoms through some mannerisms of people from the different regions maybe. All in all, this is an intriguing story with a lot of potential and definitely one for fantasy readers to enjoy. Thanks for sharing. Keep writing.

5yr
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OANNO
LV 13 Badge

For a random idea (looked at other reviews) this story is very well written. I like how we just get to the point of the story rather than a slow build up. The authors writing style is good too, it's not excellent but it's one of the better ones grammar wise on WN. Only a few typos here and there. Authors characters are well developed too, for the main cast and even side characters it appears like we are getting mini arcs on them.

5yr
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