Bab 7: Chapter 11: 1-1: Hogwarts
Disclaimer: Being neither British nor Japanese, it should therefore come as no surprise that I own neither Harry Potter nor Naruto, nor anything from their respective franchises.
Poll on my profile, details in end A/N
Book 1: Umino Iruka and the School of Magic
Just because the students wouldn't arrive until September, it didn't mean that Iruka had to wait to begin learning. Soon after confirming his agreement to the little-used position of Adjunct Professor, he began regularly visiting Hogwarts. The remainder of June and much of July were spent largely getting to know the grounds, castle, and staff of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
Headmaster Dumbledore was... eccentric. He had a definite presence and charisma, and was said to be both learned and powerful. His personality, on the other hand, tended to swing somewhat between a kindly grandfather and a crazy childish uncle, with a keen intellect hidden behind both of them. Iruka also got the sense that the man was trying to figure him out, which left the two effectively dancing around each other as both viewed the other as something of a mystery to be solved.
Minerva McGonagall was a stern, professional, efficient, no-nonsense kind of person. While her manner could get a bit brusque at times, a genuine warmth shone through when she discussed her students. Iruka found himself liking and respecting the older woman immensely.
The head of Ravenclaw House was a lot of fun. Though diminutive in stature, Filius Flitwick clearly had a mind to rival a Nara, and his past as a champion competitive duelist indicated that one underestimated Hogwarts' Charms Professor at their peril. The two had a number of fascinating discussions on a variety of academic topics, though unsurprisingly fuuinjutsu and Charms came up most often.
If there was one word to describe Pomona Sprout, it was "earthy" - and not just because of the seemingly everpresent soil marking whatever she wore. The Hufflepuff head was very grounded and practical, leaving academic concerns (other than teaching) for others while she concentrated on that which lives and grows. Based on the descriptions of the four Houses, Iruka suspected that as he was now, he would likely be wearing the black and yellow of Hufflepuff; he greatly admired their House traits of diligence and loyalty. Others might dismiss them as weaklings, but people used to say the same things about Konoha's focus on bonds and teamwork, often just before getting taken down by a well-coordinated squad of Leaf-nin. He carefully avoided thinking too much about the 'hard work' aspect to avoid mental images of bowl cuts and green spandex.
In contrast, the word that summed up Severus Snape was "unpleasant". The man's dour, sneering, solitary nature reminded the chuunin uncomfortably of a young Uchiha Sasuke, a comparison only strengthened by his black hair and eyes. Why Mr. Snape was teaching when his few terse comments indicated a profound dislike of children was a mystery, though one Iruka wasn't quite comfortable asking his soon-to-be-colleagues about just yet. He just hoped that the Potions professor's caustic attitude was toned down for his classes.
The school's resident Healer, Poppy Pomfrey, sought Iruka out during one of his visits to discuss the non-magical first aid he'd used to help Pandora Lovegood. This led to a two-hour discussion of nonmagical medical techniques and their potential to help magical Healers, during which Iruka ended up learning several simple healing and diagnostic charms that would make him more effective if he ever again needed to render first aid. He could already see "Episkey" being said a LOT after Academy spars.
While several of the castle's ghosts were quite personable and engaging, Cuthbert Binns had such a soporific effect even in ordinary conversation that Iruka reflexively attempted to release any genjutsu on him. Apparently Pandora, charitable as ever, had actually understated just how utterly boring the ghostly History professor was.
Iruka had sought out Septima Vector to establish a good working relationship so that he could consult with her as needed in his research. He found the Arithmancy Mistress to be highly similar to Professor McGonagall in both demeanor and competence, leaving him to wonder if that personality type was common among British witches of a certain age. Regardless, she seemed intrigued by his and Pandora's work, and agreed to look over Iruka's calculations on occasion and offer her own insights.
Due to the common threads between fuuinjutsu and Runic magic, the staff member with whom Iruka spent the most time not related to his job at Hogwarts was Bathsheda Babbling. The second-youngest of Hogwarts' faculty (only slightly older than Severus Snape), she was a very friendly and energetic person with a tremendous enthusiasm for her subject and the teaching thereof. Babs, as she insisted he call her, was fascinated by fuuinjutsu and committed to attending Iruka's classes as often as possible. She was also very supportive of his and Pandora's research, offering to answer his questions and suggesting that he audit some of her class sessions to improve his own knowledge of Runes. He often walked away from their conversations satisfied and informed but slightly exhausted.
An overpowering smell of alcohol presaged Iruka's first (and thus far only) meeting with Sybil Trelawney, the reclusive professor of Divination who seemed to converse almost entirely in dark portents for anyone that caught her attention. He was left to wonder how competent she could really be after she predicted his death for the third time in ten minutes, with each prediction clearly excluding both others.
Madam Irma Pince, the school's librarian, was the kind of person who controls only a small domain but compensates by wielding harsh discipline within said domain. She seemed reluctant to admit that anyone, student or staff member, might actually have a reason and a right to make use of the library's books, and threatened dire consequences should any of her precious volumes be damaged or defaced in even the slightest way.
The castle itself was beautiful and wondrous, but also confusing and more than a little frustrating at times. While he would begrudgingly admit that its constantly-variable layout could contribute greatly to a competent defense by confusing and misdirecting attackers, Hogwarts had only rarely been seriously threatened by attacking forces, most of which had been composed primarily of former students who wouldn't be thus hindered. It was also clear that Hogwarts was able to hold far more students than currently attended, as there were numerous unused classrooms and other facilities. In fact, it seemed as if almost half the rooms in the castle were either vacant or outright abandoned. Apparently low birth rates had combined with two bloody conflicts in the past fifty years to leave Britain's magical population at a low from which it was only barely beginning to recover.
For all of its illogical and at times impractical aspects, Hogwarts Castle was still, for lack of a better term, a truly magical place. The first time he'd stepped into the Great Hall, it had taken his breath away, though a smiling Professor McGonagall had told him that it was even more impressive on feast nights. It seemed to Iruka that he discovered some new wonder or curiosity with every visit, and were he of a more academically curious mindset, he thought he could happily spend the rest of his life exploring the wealth of history contained within its walls. As it was, there were a couple of occasions where he had lost track of time just chatting with an interesting ghost or portrait, learning about yet another facet of the world he had arrived in over a year before.
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Because it was an entirely new subject, with no official exams available at O.W.L. or N.E.W.T. level, and because it was as yet undetermined how long Iruka would be staying (though he had committed to teach out the end of the year if he found a way home), Iruka's fuuinjutsu class would function more like a club, taking place outside of normal class times and open to students of every House and year (as well as to faculty, of which several had already expressed interest). This meant that he could well be dealing with a very large group, but both initial and long-term interest were impossible to predict, so his office and nearby quarters were located near several unused classrooms and other chambers of varying sizes so that he could easily switch class locations based on attendance. He would also be making frequent trips back to the Rook, to share his results with Pandora more completely and interactively than a letter would allow, and to continue supervising Luna's training and just spend time with the precocious ten-year-old that had practically adopted him as an older uncle.
While he had heard of house-elves before, meeting Flippy was still a somewhat startling experience. The tiny magical servant had been assigned to his direct command at need, (though she would still be cooking and cleaning when he didn't require her services) and would handle relocating his teaching supplies between classrooms and keeping them properly stocked. She would also be handling his other needs, such as his laundry and delivering meals, snacks, and tea when he wanted them in his office or quarters. He was also informed that, should he become lost as those new to Hogwarts often did, he could call upon her for guidance as between them the elves knew every inch of the castle they cared for. This had already borne fruit, as she had shown him a room on the seventh floor that was perfect for training in private, meaning he could finally shake some of the rust off his ninjutsu and shurikenjutsu skills. Her description of the room's capabilities did warrant further study, but given the number of things Iruka was already trying to learn, it would likely have to wait.
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In the waning days of August, Iruka was called one morning for the first full staff meeting of the 1991-92 Hogwarts school year, and found himself seated at a large circular table in the Great Hall, between Hagrid and Babs, and looking at the rest of the school's staff. Most he had met at least once, but there were still a few new faces to learn. As his various new colleagues arrived, he was introduced to the school's flying instructor / Quidditch referee and the professors of Care of Magical Creatures, Muggle Studies, and Defense Against the Dark Arts.
Finally, once everyone had arrived and taken their seats, Headmaster Dumbledore stood and raised his hand for silence, which was quickly given. "Now that we are all here, we had best begin, as the term will soon be upon us and Hogwarts shall be ready. First of note is our staffing changes. Professor Quirrell has returned from his sabbatical and will be taking up the Defense Against the Dark Arts post." Dumbledore paused to allow the brief round of applause for the pale, nervous-looking man in the purple turban who gave a timid bow. "Also, for the first time in many years Hogwarts is hosting a visiting scholar; our new Adjunct Professor Iruka Umino will be offering an extracurricular class in a form of magic unique to his homeland called the Sealing Arts, which will be open to all students and staff who wish to attend." Iruka offered a bow to the table. "Professor Umino is a visitor to Britain, having been transported here by a magical accident which he is still researching in hopes of finding a way back to his elusive home country of Hi no Kuni. I would hope that, time permitting, those of us with relevant knowledge and expertise might provide what assistance we can in his quest to return home."
The next ninety minutes were filled with budgeting discussions and last-minute requests by various staff for whatever supplies they were still lacking for the coming term. From there well into the afternoon, with a break for lunch, was scheduling. Seven years, four Houses, and twelve different classes meant a complicated dance to ensure that no professors and as few students as could be arranged would be left needing to be in two places at once. Some overlap was unavoidable in the latter case, but this was confined to elective classes, and even then the staff aimed to avoid conflicts between pairs of classes that were commonly required together by professions, such as Runes and Arithmancy. Third through fifth years were the worst to schedule, as the first two years didn't have elective classes and many students tended to drop unneeded "core" classes from their schedules after their O.W.L. exams. Complicating matters further (and leading to occasional complaints by and heated words between Professors McGonagall and Snape) was the bitter rivalry between Slytherin and Gryffindor Houses; placing the two together in a class often resulted in misbehavior by members of both Houses, which was at best disruptive and could be downright dangerous in classes like Potions and Care of Magical Creatures. After settling all of the class schedules, the staff then moved on to the somewhat more tenuous but thankfully less demanding scheduling of extracurricular activities, including Iruka's fuuinjutsu classes (an hour each Tuesdays and Thursdays after dinner, and two hours on Sunday afternoons). He hoped to drum up some interest by showing off a bit of fuuinjutsu after dinner on September second, so that the students would know what the class was actually about. At the suggestion of Professor Flitwick, Iruka also ended up agreeing to teach an introductory Japanese class if there were enough students interested in learning the language.
It was approaching dinner and the last of the administrative details for the coming school year had just been hammered out when Headmaster Dumbledore rose once again. "Finally, before we adjourn, I know many of you are already aware of this, but for those that have not yet been informed: The third-floor corridor on the right-hand side is off limits to anyone wishing to remain among the living. I shall be warning the children of this at the Sorting Feast, but it will likely fall to us as the responsible adults in the castle to watch for any wayward students accidentally tempting fate and steer them back into safer areas."
That this was pronounced in the same calm, matter-of-fact tone the Headmaster had used when budgeting for floor polish was more than a little shocking to Iruka, a shock compounded by the decidedly unsurprised faces of his fellow staff. True, some looked exasperated or resigned, but all treated this as a relatively normal occurrence. "What about students deliberately tempting fate?" He asked, "Isn't there any way to just block entry outright, or at least place warning signs and some kind of alert ward?"
Dumbledore seemed taken aback for a moment by Iruka's questions, before favoring the chuunin with a twinkle-eyed smile. "Sadly, the corridor must remain accessible to certain authorised staff members, so we cannot simply seal it off, and no ward would be able to take hold without first disabling the wards of Hogwarts, at least in that area, which would pose an obviously unacceptable risk. Your point about warning signs is well-made," he said in a tone that almost managed to avoid being slightly patronizing, "but I'm sure that will be all that is truly necessary. Some of our more rebellious students may test their bravery somewhat by approaching or even slightly passing the warning signs, but they will turn back far clear of actual danger. Prior to young David Gudgeon's misadventure, one could often see groups playing a similar game with the Whomping Willow, and Madam Pomfrey was more than able to heal his injuries."
Did the man never actually interact with his students? "While I don't have much experience with homicidal foliage," being far away from the front lines of the Fourth Great War meant that he'd never encountered a single Zetsu, "I have ample experience with teenagers. The 'game' you describe doesn't surprise me at all, but there is a key difference with this corridor. Unless you tell the children why the corridor is dangerous, they won't know where the actual boundary is between safety and danger and they could easily cross that boundary. Teens generally tend to push boundaries whenever the opportunity arises, so I would expect several students to seek out the forbidden corridor before their second night here, especially if it's also mysterious. If the hazardous area can't be made inaccessible to the students, my best advice would be to make it unappealing. I don't know what's there that's so dangerous, but if you could describe it as something that is dangerous but uninteresting then very few students would be likely to actively investigate it. Perhaps say there's some sort of infestation of pests, toxic mould, or other relatively mundane hazard that can't be resolved during term?"
Now the Headmaster's expression was far less approving, as he spoke with a tone of determined finality. "I pride myself on having not lied to my students in the past, and shall not be starting now. Warning signs shall be posted around the forbidden corridor, and the students warned not to enter. I am sure that this will be more than sufficient to keep all but the most determined rule-breakers out, and they would likely find a way in despite almost any efforts we might make. Now, I believe we all have tasks and duties requiring our attention, so this meeting is adjourned."
As Dumbledore swept from the room and the rest of the staff began to rise, chattering in twos and threes, Iruka caught looks of approval and commiseration from Professors Sprout, Flitwick, and McGonagall; the last of the three approached him. "I've known Albus Dumbledore for many years now, and I'm afraid that he is not easily shifted once he sets his course. We have all, at times, tried and failed to convince him that he was making a mistake on something, but only rarely do such efforts bear fruit. In the end, we are generally left hoping that he is correct, or at least that if he is wrong that it does not cause any real harm. To be fair," she reassured him, "Albus is right far more often than not, having likely forgotten more about magic than most of us will ever learn. He was, unfortunately, correct regarding sealing or warding the corridor, as neither are practical options, and we have no staff to spare to act as guards. The portraits and house-elves have already been asked to alert us if they notice anyone entering the prohibited area - they are hardly foolproof, but it is the best we have available."
Iruka nodded sourly. "That will have to do, I guess. I just hope the Headmaster doesn't phrase his announcement in a way that's more bait to the curious than warning to the cautious."
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It is a near-universal rule that no matter how experienced and organized a person is, no matter how much opportunity they have to prepare, there will always be at least one thing they've either forgotten or left to the last minute. Thus, even with the staff numbering less than twenty people, Hogwarts was still somehow buzzing with activity on the first of September. Mr. Filch's sunny disposition was clearly not improved by the imminent arrival of several hundred walking mess-makers, and he was apparently working out his frustrations in advance by vigorously polishing various suits of armor. These armors and the weapons they carried had fascinated Iruka, being so different in design from anything he had seen in the Elemental Nations. With the help of a number of paintings and tapestries, not to mention his own training and experience, he thought he had at least a reasonable idea of how they would have been used, but it was still intriguing to see how similar goals (keeping your soldiers alive while rendering the enemy less so) could be approached from such different angles.
The house-elves had freshly dusted every classroom, the dormitory beds were made and ready to receive their residents, hearths had been lit throughout the school to ward off some of the chill inherent in a drafty stone castle in cooler weather. Everything was essentially ready, and by afternoon the bustle had become the activity born of anticipation, everyone in the castle doing whatever they could find to keep busy in a way that felt at least somewhat productive, knowing that they would later wish they'd gotten more done in advance when the hectic schedule of term began. And begin it would, tonight, as the Hogwarts Express was already busily steaming its way north.
It was time for school to begin.
A/N: Regarding the last line in the penultimate section - yeah, we all know how that goes.
Yes, Iruka is training in the Room of Requirement. He asked Flippy if there was a good place in or near the castle for him to train in private, and she gave the same answer Dobby did in OotP. No, the Room does not provide animated shinobi opponents, time-compression fields, libraries of lost ninjutsu, etc. - again, I'm trying to avoid a lot of the high-speed power gains common in fanfiction. For a look at Iruka's training room, you'll have to wait for Chapter 17 (or 1-7).
Overall, as far as Dumbledore goes, no I am not bashing him. I am trying to write a character that is intelligent, capable, and well-meaning, but also stubborn, secretive, controlling, and hubristic. It's not exactly how I usually picture his character (my mental picture of APWBD is more of a callous chessmaster), but the more benevolent (and closer-to-canon, in theory) version was the only way I could realistically get Iruka into Hogwarts long-term.
The stylistic bit last chapter was that I attempted to write the sections told from Dumbledore's perspective in a different 'voice' so to speak. I try to keep Iruka's sections relatively colloquial, while Dumbledore leans more towards being formal and erudite, bordering on florid at times. It's a policy I intend to stick with whenever I dip out of Iruka's perspective, though it'll be most noticeable in a scene coming up a few chapters from now.
I'm putting a poll up on my profile to help me plan events far ahead of what I'm writing (as I write this A/N, I've just gotten Iruka and co. out of the Chamber of Secrets.): If Umbridge heard that a Dark Lord was plotting to take over the Ministry and push a vicious blood-purist/anti-Muggle/anti-creature agenda, what would she do? For those of you whose answer ends up being "Multiple/Other", please put your answers either in reviews here or in PMs.
Fic Recommendation: 'Cheaters Prosper' by drakensis - What if Naruto had grasped the point of the First Exam, then run with it as only Naruto can? This fic is the hilarious answer.
Posted 10 September 2017
Edited 11 September 2017: Minor tweak to improve the flow of McG's dialog, per a sound recommendation from a reviewer
Edited 5 November 2017: A tweak to Dumbledore's reference to the Whomping Willow; in Prisoner of Azkaban, Remus tells Harry that the game of approaching the WW was forbidden after a boy named Davey Gudgeon nearly lost an eye. That's said shortly before winter hols in PoA (about 40% of the way through the book), and caused me to edit this chapter. I do my best to keep things canon-compliant outside of intended divergences and their effects.
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