/ Fantasy / The Great Demon System
The Great Demon System
4.55 (680 peringkat)
Ringkasan
In a world filled with abilities and superpowers, Moby Kane, a 16-year-old boy, is an orphan who is living his life with a little too much optimism, trying his best to get by.
Due to him having no ability, he had been bullied and tortured every day. However, for some odd reason, he never complained and always stayed happy no matter what. It was almost unnatural.
On one cruel day of immense pain, he realized that the world is a brutal, unforgiving place, making him regain his lost senses.
In his moment of desperation, a miracle happened.
[ You have unlocked the Demon System ]
Now that Moby has the power to change his cruel destiny, how will he use it to get back at the world that wronged him on the road to becoming the demon lord...
(Free high quality art in certain sections of the novel, {paragarph comments}) ;)
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IMPORTANT MESSAGE TO NEW READERS! PLEASE READ!
My first few chapters' writing quality is very bad and lackluster but gets much better as the novel progresses!
Also, the first 5 chaps are kinda similar to vamp system but the story and settings differentiate after that into their own thing past that point! Hope you stick around! :)
Quick note! many people in the world are cruel and almost psychotic but there is a good narrative reason for that, it will be explained later on in the novel I promise! :D
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Would this book be better if the first 7 to 10 chapters had a rewrite? Yes. Would this book be doing as well as it is if the book did not get significantly better afterwards? No. To you, the reader who is asking themselves "should I keep reading this mess of tenses and blatantly copied ideas from 'MVS'?" The answer is yes. Keep going. I almost dropped the book but am now quite a ways in and WOW it has been a pleasure to watch the author develop. As the story goes on, the grammar improves significantly, and copied ideas are few and far between, only appearing to appease plot holes that would otherwise appear. I believe that the only reason the beginning has not been torn out and replaced is because somehow, the author has managed to use such an unstable foundation for a book and return with a solid final product. Endure the beginning. It gets so much better.
Felt Vampire System is too bland for your tastes? The protagonist just too righteous and naive for your tastes? Then welcome to the Great Demon System! The MC truly lives up to his name as a demon! Expect cruel domination, ruthless schemes, and abundance of brutality! Still need more details? The MC climbs up the hierarchy of demonhood, step by step on his path to becoming a Demon Lord...perhaps even Demon God. Each and every step is a struggle filled with blood, but you can rest assured this MC will survive his tribulations not through plot armour but through sheer willpower!
so far good mc not afraid to kill and torture some dudes for exp. Mc doesn't seem like a pussy or a wimp, but good level headed has moments where he ain't that but it brings depth to the character and so his emotions and how he is feeling cause not everyone is always level headed. His powers seem to be progressing well and him as a character seem to be evolving from his previous self and becoming more demonic wich is good.
A story that is closely like Vampire system but instead of being childish its now aimed towards edgy teens. Well it was an ok read, but I think the story just wasn't compelling enough for me. The world building was almost like VS, an alien or a superiur race threatens humanity, then mysterious object appeaared on earth, but instead of books we have orb that gave them powers. Also where the countries willingly splitted themselves apart was unrealistic. You see people are very nationalistic, read a chinese novel and you will see what I mean Lol. The characters are underdeveloped and they changed drastically with convenient plot devices. My first problem with the main character was his sudden development, I read the first chapters and at first he was pretty hollow and naive which I got turned off for a bit, but then the necklace plot device came and he became a complete psychopath, okay I think it was good. But then I found few problems, first the character did a complete 180, as though his emotions were suppressed, no reflection, no guilt in fact he was happy about it. There was even no foreshadowing of his psychopathic tendencies. He evolves into a new person. As someone being poor and bullied he came across as naive and easily fooled, he was easily convinced that a drink can costing 1000 usd, because he had the necklace on. The author might say negative emotion or was it energy, well Im tired of scrolling it up. But.. The negative emotions is kinda crap, because is being suspicious considered a negative emotion? Does thinking in general considered a negative emotion? Does having common sense considered a negative emotion? If the author admitted the necklace drained most of his IQ level to the trash can. I would have accepted it. The character wasnt fleshed out very well, it would have been better if he was a goody naive guy, then slowly turning into a calculating psychopath. The way it was written was lazy writing at best. Where he did a complete 180 in personality and became psychopath who tortured Flynn severely who was already defeated. I understand that the author needs to hasten the development but it would have been better if in the early chapter there were signs he was a psychopath or at least calculating. It was as though some new person just possessed him. He makes some stupid decisions but nothing major. The FL on this which is assumed is another card board cut out, shes a psychopath, narcissitic, and conceitied character, I dont really like any of them. The pet stuff was kind of ridiculous though, no matter how arrogant a person is people dont act that way, there was no subtlety on her character its was too upfront. And she was also turned into a servant. As someone who were that arrogant she just brushed it off because the MC is so attractive that she wanted to rape him, smh. I think the dormmates are okay though, they have realistic personalities displayed so far. The bullies were your cliche troupes seen several times on novels and anime, they just beat up the MC because they wanted to. All that goes into their head was to bully, they were very flat as characters and only exists for conflict. But that just my opinions and thoughts, peace.
Membuka SPOILER
So far this novel is great I love the torturing part more hehehe ๐not that am a psychopath....or maybe I am ๐ค....well whatever the mc is so evil, he is not a bad person but he is to his enemies he shows them no mercy and his development is so smooth he is very cautious not to get caught by the academy and he has a little partner in crime hehehe๐ The mc is very smart and he isn't afraid of anyone......๐ this novel is a bit better than "my vampire system" they might look similar at first but as the story goes it gets more different and more better....the MC's are totally different in character this novels mc is ruthless and that's what makes it fun ๐ But another difference is "my vampire system" updates more chapters๐ฃ ahhhh so frustrating it will be nice if the author try to update more chapters pretty please ๐๐ฃ and I will keep supporting this novel.....great novel by the way I will recommend this to people ๐๐คฉ
This is really bad story. Your Mc is trash. I mean who laughs after torturing someone. I could understand satisfaction but laughing is so cringy. And when I read that he let the girl die just to hide his ability, I gave up. I mean she was the first girl who showed some sympathy without even knowing his real powers. She is way above the first 2 girls of his group and he let her die. Again thi is is shit.
Its revenge **** built on the vampire system thats so close that the only time it sidetracks is to have an anti hero that tortures people. I recommend the writer seek therapy because THIS IS VAMPIRE SYSTEM REVENGE PORN, SAME CONCEPT JUST WITH A ANTIHERO
This light novel my opinion is very bad. The beginning starts off horribly. How did it get to the top 10, I have no idea? The main character is unlikeable, Side characters are unlikeable the world itself is thought up to be a horrible mess. The novel needs a serious rewrite. The premise itself isn't even that original this light novel is slightly above-average. The times I can think of a story that starts off with will people beat me up and now I am starting to become a demon king. A LOT. What even makes it worse, is that it's not that different. Sure the best thing that you can say about this is that the reading quality isn't that bad, That's it!
Shameless author here! I'm glad so many of you are enjoying my work! All of you are ones that motivate me to keep writing! Thank you all for your support!
Not worth the time. Super annoying main character. Writing style was better in other system books aka Vampire System. I dont want to read a bunch of โHAHAHAHA.โ
ive read this novle to the most recent chapters,ive enjoyed all the chaps ive read and the comunity, this book has a good mixture of sci-fi and fantasy havijg a balance still leaning towards fantasy for now, also a note about the author, the author keeps up with his fans and has a discord that you can join to talk with othere fans and the author himself. There are some chaps that arent for the immature or people who are soft skinned and for anyone who thinks that it dives down the novle any no those chaps dont anything in the novle has always been to develop the story and it dosent hold back if you stop after a chap "goes to far" its your own fualt for not heeding the warnings this novle is for people with a darker side and are mature about it if you dont like a chap skip it and move on but dont complain about drip is there to listen to any critisizims and is doing his best to meet the demand of both us and webnovel, back to the reveiw there are some chaps with sexual and there was one minor enstance of rape but not a chap full of it, I skiped these ones becuase im disintressted in them but they do have some value to the storys develpment and i suggest you scroll down to the bottom of the chaps to find any thing important to the story, also if you do start reading the novle and are new to it, then i suggest that you read up to at least chapter 80 before decideing if you like the novle or not, well this reveiw is a bit long so sorry about the 1483 word reveiw
Positives: The writing quality although pretty bad at the start gets significantly better as it goes along, the updates are also relatively stable. Negatives: This fanfic is just weird, the author tries to portray the main character as this ruthless demon, but it doesn't really work, one moment he is torturing someone; doing inhumane things to them, the next moment he is chilling and laughing with his dorm buddies. You could say that the author is trying to make him seem like a psychopath, but I truly think it's just down to bad writing since the main character doesn't show all the traits of a psycho. In addition, most things seem forced, take Jayden for example, she happens to be rich so he obatins a source of income to purchase items, she also just happens to like the powers given to her when she becomes a demon so shes somewhat loyal, then she just so happens to fall in love if the mc, the same thing happens when Abby joins, she just so happens to think that the mc is some kind of martial arts guru, I mean I don't think that I need to keep going, you see my point, everything just seems so forced. Okay, now let's talk about the torture sessions, I understand that the author thinks that he needs to constantly escalate the brutality of these sessions, and although that is somewhat true, as it validates the story (he's a demon, etc), but, there are lines that you shouldn't cross, this was blasted through in chapter 112, I understand that the author has apologized for what was written, but, at the end of the day it was written, the mc has to be somewhat likable, that's just a fact, writing things like that will make the mc seem like a demon no doubt, but it also makes him extremely unlikeable, and for me personally I just couldn't continue to read onwards. Conclusion: Although I don't like this fanfic, I do think that the author is actually kinda good as a writer, it's just that everything outside of the upload times and the writing quality is not so good.
Membuka SPOILER
I am the exp of my Holy Scripture Review. Webnovel is my body, exp is my blood. I have created over a thousand useless reviews. Unknown to sleep, nor known to reality. I have withstood Cliff-Kun to create many reviews. Yet, these hands will never hold anything. So, as I pray ... Unlimited Exp Works!
I really liked idea of world like "My vampire system" but let's be serious mvs is really bad, but this novel is in world with similar rules but it's made by much better writer.
I dropped this due to the horrendous writing quality. First, the beginning chapters have been the worst quality of the English language I have ever seen, even from novels that have been translated from another language. The author is constantly using lower level vocabulary, so there are many occasions where he could use a better synonym, or just word the sentence better. The author has also shown very poor use of the English language, starting sentences with "But" and poor use of conjunction words. Secondly, this is a blatant "inspired" novel from My Vampire System, but the author has inserted what I think are his own power fantasies into it. Thirdly, this is another complaint about the unbearable use of the English language in this novel. The Author is constantly overexplaining things that would be better to have readers infer into, such as living condition. I hope the Author does not delete bad reviews, because if so I've lost all my respect for him, because it's just a sign that shows bad character.
Basically a surface read. Author copies the structure of vampire system and tries to make it his own. I admit this isn't much of a problem as mvs is also frustrating but this is so over the top and there really isn't a reason for that. The MC is a psychopath basically because the story demands it and because he is supposed to be a demon. Not as creative as the book think it is.
Bad writing quality, the sentences are upside down. Very childish narrative quality. I was distracted by it. World background alsmot a copy paste with VS Big WTF for character, mc is very unlikable. Like I donโt understand, he is very inconsistent personality wise. No negative emotion doesnt mean pure stupidity. Very childish way to caracterise mc psychopatic nature, there is two mode intense but like very intense murderer mode or seem to be super chill making friend with good poeple mode. Mc has the balls to judge somebody and befriending good guys. His way of thinking and his rationality is very limited. Story wise, well lets just say thats not my way of imagining a demon. I respect that but its written is a way that is personally very disturbing and unlikable Author ? Is everything good with you buddy ? Do you need someone to talk to ? Have you some past terrible trauma ? There i a lot of poeple who can help you know.
There are few grammatical errors, however the writing style just feels so childish... I got to chapter 44... you might be fine with it, who knows.i recommend giving it a try atleast.
This is genuinely one of the worst written things I've ever read. Character personalities change on a dime or are never really fully established so they just warp to fit whatever narrative role the author needs, dialogue reads as if the author has never had a full conversation with another human being and has just pieced together dialogue from D-level movie scripts. The tone of the story is all over the place. I have a friend who's a high school English teacher and I've seen better writing from his students papers. I'm assuming the author is 14-16 years old so I guess it's not shocking that this is so bad but a lot of the problems could have been lessened if he just read more actual books and stole ideas and style from them.
IMPORTANT MESSAGE TO NEW READERS! PLEASE READ! My first few chapters' writing quality is very bad and lacklustre, as I was still a newbie at the time, but gets much better as the novel progresses! Also, the first 5 chaps can be frustrating (For a reason that is greatly hinted at) and are kinda similar to vamp system but the story and settings differentiate after that into their own thing past that point! I know my story isn't 100% perfect but there are at least some things to like about it! Hope you stick around! โค๏ธ No Harem too! I am part of anti-harem gang :D Harems add too much filler, something I absolutely don't want! I want substance in every chapter! Expect a little bit of romance but that will by no means be the main focus of the story. IF YOU ARE A VERY SENSITIVE PERSON THIS NOVEL IS NOT FOR YOU! The novel is also really gorry, the MC is a ruthless person who is not your generic protagonist and more of a gray anti-hero. He is really dumb at first but evolves into someone much smarter and more cunning! He is not world-breakingly OP and uses his brain to try to come out on top of any predicament he finds himself in. Sometimes the gore is harsh and other times it's funny so do expect that! I try to add comedy whenever I can in ways you may not expect or see coming! Thank you for reading this review! I hope you enjoy my novel! ๐