Bab 34: Enter Guy!

"Let's just get out of here," Sakura sighed, as she grabbed Naruto and Sasuke by the hand and dragged them away from the weirdos. "We're running out of time, anyway…"

Sakura stuck out her tongue at Izumo and Kotetsu as they passed by classroom 201, ignoring the Genjutsu that they had cast to make it look like they were one floor higher than they really were. The inseparable Chūnin duo who had arrested her earlier in the day had disguised themselves as random Genin, but Sakura could still tell who they really were.

"Hey, you there! Frowny face!" Rock Lee called out from behind them. "Wait up!"

"Why don't you leave Sakura-chan alone, you bushy-browed freak!" Naruto shouted back at him. "Get lost!"

"The name's Rock Lee," he continued.

'We know,' Inner Sakura retorted, 'you already told us.'

Rock Lee's form flickered, and in a flash, he was right in front of Sasuke, who blinked in surprise. His eyes had lost track of the green-suited boy, and Lee hadn't even used the Body Flicker!

"It's common courtesy to introduce yourself before asking for a duel," Rock Lee continued, making a rude, palm upwards beckoning gesture at Sasuke. "Now, shall we exchange pointers?"

"… The name's Uchiha Sasuke," Sasuke responded. "But I'm guessing you already knew that…"

"Hold up, this isn't going to be a fair fight," Sakura interjected. "We're just rookies, while you've already been on active duty for more than a year now, Lee..."

"Don't butt in," said Sasuke stiffly. "If he wants a beating that badly, then I'll gladly give him one."

There was no way that Sasuke would ever be able to beat Rock Lee at this point, but it would be a good learning experience for him… and also for Naruto.

"Don't worry about wasting chakra for the Sharingan, I heard that the first part of the Chūnin exams is a written exam," Sakura lied to him. "Go all out from the start, use the Sharingan. Now, I'm just going to sit over here and fill in this exam application form, I haven't had the time to do it yet…"

To be perfectly honest, Sakura was only too glad to let Sasuke go up against the monster of hard work first. Besides, copying Lee's Taijutsu would be a good thing for him!

Nope, she wasn't scared of Lee at all!

"Oh…" said Lee dejectedly.

Now that he knew that Sakura wouldn't be watching, Lee had half a mind to just give up on his challenge. Still, that was one thing, and this was another! To prove to himself that he could become a splendid shinobi and surpass geniuses through hard work and through only practising Taijutsu, that was his ninja way!

And just like that, Lee's and Sasuke's duel then began… and then ended a few moments later, with predictable results. Lee's true combo was just something you had to be able to tank in order to have a chance to fight back afterwards, there was no escaping it once it had started…

Leaf Hurricane into Dancing Leaf Shadow! And finally, Primary Lot—

"Stop right there!" a man's voice suddenly rang out of seemingly nowhere. "That's enough, Lee!"

Rock Lee had kicked Sasuke up into the air and flickered right behind him, but just as he'd been about to wrap Sasuke into a living mummy with his forearm bandages (to stop Sasuke from wriggling out of his fate of being piledrivered into the unforgiving ground, of course), a windmill had flown out of nowhere and pinned Lee's bandages to the wall behind him, effectively stopping him from finishing his deadly Taijutsu and killing Sasuke right there and then by shattering his neck and skull bones into a million pieces.

Seeing that Sasuke was still falling headfirst towards the ground, Sakura quickly finished filling in her application form, before catching Sasuke in a princess carry, burying him headfirst into her cleavage. Sasuke was trembling uncontrollably, poor lil' guy…

Although, perhaps that was just because Sakura was restricting his airways with her frontage.

"You got your butt kicked, Sasuke!" Naruto chortled

Despite his laughter, Naruto was shocked on the inside. As much as he liked to bluster, he didn't think he could beat this Lee bloke either! However, Naruto was more envious than shocked, really. Why hadn't he tried to fight the bushy-browed freak first, he berated himself inwardly; then it would have been him in Sakura's arms, damn it!

"Lee! That technique is forbidden!"

The voice berating Lee was coming from a large tortoise that had appeared out of nowhere. It was even wearing a Konoha forehead protector around its neck…

"I wouldn't have used the Reverse Lotus," Rock Lee sputtered at the tortoise. "Never…"

"Hey, hey, Sakura," Naruto leaned in, whispering, "that's a turtle, right…?"

Could turtles become Jōnin-sensei in charge of human Genin!? Probably not, right!?

"It's probably Lee's sensei's summoned beast," Sakura said wisely.

"Sooo… can turtles train to be shinobi?"

"If an ostrich can become shinobi, then I guess anything can."

Suddenly, while Naruto and Sakura were in the middle of exchanging turtle facts, a burst of smoke exploded from the top of the tortoise's carapace, and a man dressed in a green jumpsuit identical to Lee's stepped out of the smoke, assuming a Jojo's Bizarre Adventure pose.

It was Might Guy, Team 3's Jōnin-sensei!

"The power of youth!" Guy exclaimed, "is overflowing!"

Sakura glared at Guy resentfully; it was his fault that Tenten had so little screen time! Just like his rival Kakashi, Guy only ever trained his favourite student; Guy and Kakashi might have been great shinobi, but their ability to teach really left to be desired…

'I, Sakura,' Inner Sakura declared, 'would like to call you the second-worst Jōnin in charge instructor!'

(The first prize for worst sensei goes to Kakashi, so let's chalk that one up as another victory for Kakashi, in the pair's interminable series of duels.)

"What amazing eyebrows!" Naruto blurted out. "They're out of this world, ya know…"

"All right, I've seen enough," Sakura sighed, as she bemusedly watched Guy smack the living daylights out of Lee for using a forbidden technique on a comrade, before finally wrapping the boy in a bear hug to make up. "Come on, you two…"

Alas, the strongest Jōnin in the village was not quite done with them just yet. Guy knew his eternal rival Kakashi very well, and if Kakashi of all people had finally given in and taken some disciples, then there had to be something special about them!

"So, how is your Kakashi-sensei, by the way?" Guy said, turning his gaze towards Team 7.

Sakura shuddered slightly upon noticing Might Guy staring at the three of them. She knew that he didn't mean them any harm, but he was just too freaky in real life; the way his caterpillar-like eyebrows wriggled when he talked made it look like they were about to crawl off his face and jump at them!

"You know that guy?" Sasuke asked warily.

Might Guy smirked, and he rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

"Know him? I'd say it's a bit more than that…"

And in the blink of an eye, he disappeared from their field of view. Feeling a chill down her back, Sakura immediately turned on her heel and backed away.

"Oho?" Guy exclaimed. "You've got some good reflexes… as expected from a disciple of my eternal rival, Kakashi!"

Guy then leaned in, and that's when Naruto and Sasuke finally reacted.

"Good bone structure, perfect for Taijutsu…" Guy said thoughtfully, as he examined Sakura's body in the most platonic way anyone had ever stared at her. "…almost as good as mine, in fact. That's it, I've decided! I'm making you my honorary disciple!"

Might Guy then whipped out a green jumpsuit and dangled it in front of her

"Here you go!" he declared, giving her one of his iconic, trademarked smile-and-thumbs-up. "All of my disciples get one."

What was it with Sakura being a weirdo magnet today? And why was she being offered the same unstylish green onesie twice in a row!?

"No, thank you!" Sakura declined, making an X in front of her with her hands, and accidentally jostling her large bosom with her arms in the process. Man, those things were really starting to get in her way…

Still, Guy's offer was tempting. Sakura was already pretty good at Kenjutsu thanks to the System, and training in Taijutsu with Guy would surely help her along that road…

However!

Kenjutsu was only a tool to help her grow stronger. For now, it was her main way of defending herself, since her chakra was still relatively weak and she knew precious few Jutsu.

However, she didn't intend on keeping things like this forever. She had reincarnated into a fantastical world of magical ninjas, so there was no way she was going to stick to the samurai playstyle forever! Sakura was planning on becoming a Genjutsu specialist, and mastering all five chakra natures was also part of her plans to grow stronger.

So, with that in mind, when exactly was she supposed to get the time to train her body to the extent of mastering the Eight Gates!? Not to mention that chakra control was Sakura's greatest strength, and unleashing the unbridled might of the Eight Gates was the complete opposite of control…