Bab 17: 17 Insecurity & Insensitivity
"Prove it," I took his hand, preventing him from going.
*tch*
He clicked his tongue the moment our hands had contact. However, as soon as I thought my hand was about to be disconnected, the strength went nowhere.
"I will talk so could you let go of me? On second thought, I wanted to confirm this side of you as well," Hajime smiled with dark circles under his eyes.
"Sure. I can't get my wife to misunderstand me for gay anyway," I released the hand.
"So this you have a wife, what's she named? Umino Aqua? Sakamata Chloe? Sakura Miku? Kusona? Or... is it that gi-" Hajime began to talk more keeping his dead fish eyes expression.
"Hold up, I'm not getting you... is what I'd like to say, but are those my possibilities?" at first I thought this man was doing drugs and having hallucinations from his looks, but out of 5 girls, he managed to call 3 women I've met in the past.
After taking him seriously, it's not that hard to catch on to what he was trying to say, "and my wife is Chloe."
"Ah, the dame-ningen one. It's as you guessed. I'm a reincarnator. More precisely, 'Return By Death.' We are the same, an existence summoned through the glitch of Fantasy, or what I'd like to call, Bug."
Numerous pieces of information came flying at me. Because I had a conception that the reason I had transferred to this world was the cause of the bug, Hajime's words were strangely convincing.
"Then what is Return By Death?" I deemed knowing the reason why I am here which I pondered for over 10 years to be worthless and decided to ask more questions about him.
"You don't know Natsuki Subaru, do you?"
"The main character of Re:Zero that has been causing many strange phenomenon in the Fantasy Projector?" I pondered what relationship return to death has with Natsuki Subaru and the dot has connected to form a line.
Countless strange situations. A main character without plot armor. Strange action from the main characters of different servers that is as if they know what is going to happen next.
"It's obvious for you to not know him when it was first released as light novel it was 2014, around the time you said to me you got transferred to this world,"
"Return by death, so his and your ability is to return to the past after you died. Moreover, the increasing server as time progresses indicates at some point in the story which is what we call 'Arc,' your progress will be automatically saved and the day you'll revive will change to the saved progress."
(Author Notes: For references, take a look at Earth's Information's [Game] section's Fantasy Projector 2)
"That's a convenient power," I nodded while keeping some thoughts inside my head.
The cost of returning to the past... was death. Although there are plenty of ways to die painlessly, you can't erase the fact that 'you died once.'
Hajime's white hair must be the cost of the stress of dying over and over.
As for why I knew so much about Re:Zero? It was one of my favorite stories. I observed every single server that was made by it, and perhaps of my insensitivity in feeling that I fell in love with that fantasy seeing as the character grows up both physically and mentally.
"*sigh* this is why you're so troublesome dealing with. Moreover, the current you are under the debuff of 'insensitivity.' If you got Tadano's skill... haiya~ who knows how much your individuality blossoms," Hajime sighed with a tired expression.
"It's as you guessed. I am someone who befriended Natsuki Subaru a year later from now on, and it's my 17th time reincarnating. It is a flawed ability without a save point."
I nodded as Hajime continued depressedly.
"A single death is all it cost, to wipe out all the time you've spent, the efforts you've burned out, all the memory you've treasured. A single death and you are brought to the familiar yet unknown world where you are erased,"
I thought at the moment that reincarnator must have had it rough, but I didn't know what to say. Should I console him? But he's also mentally much older than me and shouldn't be that weak.
"Just don't die, then," I spoke the words that came to my mind.
"...hahaha," Hajime suddenly laughed as tears came out from his tired face.
"That's true, then protect me will you?" Hajime unreasonably said.
Somehow, I felt he became brighter than before, but considering my insensitivities, that must be my imagination.
"What, no," I drew back my face and shook it.
"Why not. I can live in the future for 9 years. You just have to protect me 10 years later... How about this, you don't like being bound by the country, right? I'll help you out in that terms from the dark," Hajime suggested.
Honestly said, I am starting to get persuaded. If I want to get strong enough to protect my wife, I am bound to become a professional player. And professional players are bound to receive the attention of the country.
If you won't get involved with the country, you would be labeled as a useless player in society. If you team up with foreigners with less shackle compared to Japan, you would be labeled as a traitor.
Hajime was carrying a hard expression on his face.
"Hmm... Alright, how about I will be your wife's bodyguard 3 years later?" Hajime then looked at me straight with a serious expression.
"Out of my 17 lifetimes, 6 versions of you have always regretted it. You see, we 'bugs' are similar but minimally different from the people of this world. Therefore, the person who can understand us isn't impossible to find but hard to come by."
"Not to mention, a person like you who's able to adapt to anything is a being in the realm of a monster. You've rarely made acquaintance on Earth and even Companions weren't enough for it."
'So that's why back in the day when I was homeless, people except those with malicious intent have been ignoring my presence,' I pondered deeply before considering Hajime's proposal.
"Then, let me ask you a final question," I opened my mouth without waiting for his response.
"What was I in your past lives?"
Hajime rested his face with dark bags under his eyes between his index finger and thumb before pondering.
"Let's see, a Universe Boss and or the Greatest Teammate," Hajime answered seriously.
"Pfft, what's with that," I unconsciously blurted at the unexpected question.
"You are strong as a hero (someone with everything to protect). However, you are stronger as a villain (someone who has nothing to protect)," Hajime quoted.
In contrast, I returned my expression and nodded to him.
"Alright, I'll end everything whatever comes in 10 years. Looking forward to working with you," I said and shook hands. Thus, I gained my first ally.
*ki~ng* *ko~ng*
The chime bell rang.
PERTIMBANGAN PENCIPTA 
R4IN
R4IN To be honest, the [Kill Sakamata Chloe] Scenario hasn't been planned out yet.
Whatever though, because I have 3 years of novel time.