Bab 149: Girl Talk in the Capital

Earth Land, Ishgar, Kingdom of Fiore, Magnolia.

While Elicia was wishing she was anywhere other than the Feeding Bowl restaurant, Alfonzo had just finished having dinner at the guild hall with Cana, who just returned from a quest, Ultear, Erza, Mirajane, and Sun, whose trip back to Akane Beach also ended.

While the girls all looked satisfied with their meals, Alfonzo was laying on the table with the whites of his eyes showing after trying, and failing, to eat Mirajane's latest... objects on a plate. Because if anyone were to ask Alfonzo, he would claim that there was no way whatever he just ate could be called food of any kind.

"Seriously, Mira, are you trying to kill him?" Cana asked while looking at Alfonzo with pity.

"I don't understand why this keeps happening..." Mirajane replied with a confused expression. "I mean, it looked really good. It smelled great, too."

"I understand what you mean." Erza replied with a nod. "The culinary arts are much more profound than those of the sword."

"It can't be that bad, can it?" Sun asked curiously as she reached toward Alfonzo's plate with her fork.

Until now, the only one who had ever eaten Mirajane's cooking was Alfonzo. So, the other girls were curious to see how anyone else would react.

Today, Mirajane had cooked spaghetti and meatballs. Something simple. However, the intricacies of meat sauce could also be quite deep as well.

"Here we go." Sun said as she finished wrapping a few spaghetti noodles around her fork.

Immediately afterward, Sun put the fork in her mouth and started to chew. However, not even two chews later, Sun's eyes rolled back and she fell face first onto the table.

"Holy shit..." Cana muttered in disbelief. "Fonzie lasted at least until he swallowed..."

"I Really don't understand what could be so wrong." Mirajane said, sounding even more confused than before.

"Mira, can I ask you something?" Ultear said with slight fear in her tone as she inched away from the murder weapon known as Mirajane's cooking.

"Yes." Mirajane replied while tilting her head cutely.

"Have you ever taste-tested your own food?" Ultear asked with curiosity.

That prompted everyone at the table, who was still conscious, to look in the white-haired girl's direction.

"Oh, of course not." Mirajane said as if the idea was ludicrous. "If I were to do that, I would end up getting fat."

With Mirajane's response, understanding dawned on everyone who heard it. The mystery as to why Mirajane did not know the destructive ability of her cooking had been found. The next mystery, however, was how they would convince her to test her food as she cooked it to avoid situations like these in the future.

Earth Land, Ishgar, Kingdom of Fiore, Crocus.

Later that evening, Elicia, Marin, and Lucy were finally able to extricate themselves from the company of the wizards of Blue Pegasus and Quatro Cerberus. Getting Darkness to leave, however, took much more effort. Especially after she saw the harsh methods Elicia was willing to use on both Bacchus and Ichiya when they got a bit too handsy.

Then, after finally getting away from Darkness, the trio found a hotel near the center of the city and booked a room for three.

"OMG! I wanna go back home." Elicia muttered as she flopped face first on one of the three beds in the hotel room.

"Yeah, that Darkness is really… intense." Marin said with a wry smile. Then, she looked at Lucy as she sat on another one of the beds. "And to think, your Celestial Spirit, Virgo, is her best friend."

"Well, considering the way she is, it's not really a surprise." Lucy said as she, too, took a seat on the last bed in the room. "But it does make things really tiring whenever the two of them meet."

To that, Marin couldn't help but giggle.

"And you've got it easy, Lucy." Marin said while glancing at Elicia. "In most cases, you'll only have to deal with two of them. But Lici… She's gotta deal with the whole Unholy Trinity whenever they gather around her."

"Kya~~~~~~~~~!" Elicia screamed into the mattress with just the thought.

"And then there's Bacchus and Ichiya." Lucy added with a smile. "Talk about pushy."

"Seriously, I'm surprised they're even still alive with the way Alfonzo is so protective of you." Marin said, once again glancing at Elicia.

"Oh, Ichiya will be fine." Elicia said, rolling over onto her back. "He's met Alfonzo before. But Bacchus has just gotten lucky that Fonzi e has better things to do than hunt down a drunk. Otherwise, there would be trouble… and a lot of destruction.

"Huh?" Lucy exclaimed in surprise. "Alfonzo didn't do anything to Ichiya because of the way he flirts with you?"

"Well… Alfonzo and I know that he's not really flirting." Elicia replied with a wry smile. "It's just his twisted view of how a gentleman should act. Besides, he already found out what happens if he flirts with one of Fonzie's girls. Hehe."

Hearing Elicia's giggle, Marin and Lucy were both interested in hearing that story. So, they leaned a bit closer to the bed Elicia was laying on subconsciously.

"It was shortly after Erza made S-Class." Elicia said in a nostalgic tone. "Back when Alfonzo was adapting to his Automail arm."

"Wait!" Lucy exclaimed in confusion. "Alfonzo's Automail arm? But he has two flesh and blood arms… Why would he need an Automail arm?"

"Oh~, that's right." Marin said with a smile. "I forgot you weren't hear back then. Alfonzo lost his left arm at one point."

From there, Marin went on to tell Lucy about Erza's first S-Class quest. During the retelling, Elicia would chime in with additional details from time to time, leaving Lucy thoroughly flabbergasted. Before she could ask how Alfonzo got his arm back, however, Elicia continued with the story of the Techno Organic Metal and it's properties as a double-edged sword.

"By now, I'm pretty sure that all four of Alfonzo's limbs have been strengthened by the Techno Organic Metal." Elicia said. "Actually, not just his limbs. Most of his body has probably been strengthened. As of now, he's probably the physically strongest member of the guild."

"Oh, wow…" Lucy replied in amazement. A moment later, she snapped back to her senses. "That's crazy, but we got off topic. What happened to Ichiya when he flirted with one of Alfonzo's girlfriends?"

"Right." Elicia said with a nod. "Master Bob asked Alfonzo to come to Onibus to do some maintenance on his magic vehicle's engine. And Erza, after hearing that Alfonzo would be traveling alone, decided to come with him."

After getting to that point, Elicia smiled regretfully, which made Marin and Lucy even more interested. Seeing that, she giggled before continuing.

"At that point, Cana, Erza, Sun, and I were Fonzie's only girlfriends." Elicia said. "Unfortunately, Cana was too drunk to ride in a car, and Sun was on a quest with me. Meaning, there was no one to go with Fonzie and make sure he didn't push himself too hard. Other than Erza, that is. So, she went with him. Not that she could really do much if things got out of hand."

"What do you mean?" Lucy asked in confusion. "Erza seems really protective of those she's close to… You know what, never mind. When we were chasing after Eisenwald, she knocked out Natsu, explained something, forgot him on the train, and beat him up because he didn't know what she explained while Natsu was unconscious."

"Yeah, that sounds like Erza." Marin replied with a wry smile. "Then, there's all the forceful hugs into her chest plate."

"Hehe. That's what makes Erza, Erza, though." Elicia said with a smile. "Anyway, where was I? Oh, yeah. As soon as they arrived in Blue Pegasus' HQ, they were greeted by Ichiya and the three boys with him earlier, the Trimens. But when Ichiya saw Erza, he lost it."

"What happened?" Marin asked, curiosity almost tangibly radiating from her eyes.

"Well… How did Fonzie put it?" Elicia replied contemplatively. "His nostrils flared to triple their normal size as he approached Erza. Then, he put his nose less than an inch (2.54 cm) away from her and began to take deep breaths. After that he said: 'Your Perfume is exquisite. Young lady, please join me for a cup of tea so we can discuss life. And possibly our lives together.' Those words and actions left Erza petrified to the point that she could not even react to Ichiya's attempt to hold her hand."

Hearing that, both Marin and Lucy opened their eyes wide. Then, they leaned even closer, as if there was a chance that they would miss something if they didn't.

"Luckily, Fonzie was there." Elicia continued. "Before Ichiya could touch her, Alfonzo's right hand clamped around Ichiya's wrist. He then told Ichiya that Erza was his girlfriend. In response, Ichiya challenged Fonzie to a duel for Erza's hand."

"Seriously, they fought over Erza?" Lucy asked excitedly. "It's just like a fairy tale."

"Nope. That didn't happen." Elicia replied with a smile.

"Then, how did they resolve it?" Marin asked, sounding a bit disappointed.

"The way Erza explained it…" Elicia said, her smile turning gentle. "… Fonzie let go of Ichiya's wrist with a deadpan expression on his face. However, before Ichiya could start posturing even more, Fonzie's right hand was coated in electricity before he backhanded Ichiya halfway across the guild hall. Then, with righteous anger, he walked over to the barely conscious Ichiya, picked him up from the floor by his collar, and said: 'Listen here you little gremlin. I won't fault you for being attracted to my girlfriend, she's freakin' sexy…"

"Alfonzo definitely didn't say 'freakin'' back then." Marin said with a giggle.

"… But if you ever again treat her like a prize to be won, I'll personally break every bone in your body." Elicia continued.

Hearing that, Marin and Lucy's eyes began to sparkle. Then, Marin lowered her head with a blush on her cheeks.

"If I had heard this story earlier, then that night would have probably turned out different." Marin muttered.

"That night?" Lucy asked. "You two mentioned 'that night' before we left Magnolia. What are you talking about?"

Immediately, Marin froze. She was so enamored by Elicia's story that she accidentally said what she was thinking out loud.

"Oh, come on, Marin." Lucy said, standing up from the bed she was sitting on. Then, she walked over to Marin and sat down next to her. "It's just us girls here. I promise I won't tell anyone."

For the next few minutes, Lucy pestered Marin to hear the story, slowly breaking through Marin's defenses. Eventually, under Elicia's gaze, Marin told the story of Ultear and Sun's first time with Alfonzo and how she watched from up close while playing with herself.

By the end of Marin's story, Lucy's eyes and mouth were wide open while she had a blush on her cheeks and she would occasionally rub her thighs together.

"Seriously?" Lucy asked absent mindedly. "Was it really that big?"

"Oh, it definitely is." Elicia replied before licking her lips. "In fact, I know exactly what I'm gonna do when we get back."

"But how can something that big even fit inside?" Lucy muttered in a dumbfounded tone.

"Well, you're more than welcome to come by and find out." Elicia said with a grin and a wink. "I mean, it's obvious that Fonzie likes you, so I'm sure he won't mind. Naturally, you're free to come and find out, too, Marin. Fonzie even offered last time, remember."

With that, Lucy's blush deepened while Marin covered her face in embarrassment. However, it did not take long until the girls continued their girl talk, most of the conversation being of the more… spicy… variety. Then, about three hours later, the girls decided to take showers and go to sleep.

"Before you two fall asleep." Elicia said after coming out of the hotel room's bathroom. "Here's the plan for tomorrow."

That statement drew the sleepy gazes of the other two girls.

"Marin and I will go and see the client, Mark Hamilton, after breakfast." Elicia said while drying her hair with a towel. "Lucy, you'll stay in the room until we get back. After that, we'll discuss a strategy for catching the assumed kidnapper or kidnappers."

"Wait!" Lucy said, sitting up in her bed. "Why do I have to wait here?"

In response, Elicia tilted her head in confusion.

"Because you're on punishment and aren't allowed to take any quests for a while?" Elicia replied in the form of a question.

Immediately, Lucy froze. While on duty as a waitress at the guild hall, she happened to glance at the quest board after Mirajane finished updating it. However, when she saw the quest sheet for the "Missing Girls" quest, she was immediately drawn to it. Then, Elicia dragged her along to Crocus. In the process, she had totally forgotten about her punishment.

"If you knew that, then, why did you bring me with you?" Lucy asked in an agitated tone.

"Because I knew that if you didn't see this quest completed with your own eyes, it would keep bothering you." Elicia replied while taking a seat on her bed. Then, she shrugged as she continued. "So, I brought you along."

To that, Lucy had no idea how to respond. So, instead of saying anything, she huffed in annoyance, laid back down, and turned away from Elicia with a pout on her face. In response, Elicia could only smile as she too laid down to go to sleep.

Meanwhile, Marin lay in bed quietly, waiting for the other two to fall asleep so that she could vent some of her more primal urges with the assistance of her right hand. After Elicia told her and Lucy, in such great detail, what Alfonzo was capable of in bed, her sexual frustration had reached all new heights.