Bab 80: Chapter 80: A death wish inadvertently revealed

Lucy had thought yesterday that everything would be all right. 'But you decided against it?'

'Yes.'

'Why?' She wanted to pull her daughter into her and hold her until they both felt safe.

'Because I realised there was something I cared about.'

Not the family. That thought was killing Lucy. 'Who? Him?' What could a stranger offer? She had it all, already, from her family. Wasn't it enough? The pain curled around her heart. This was a monumental rejection.

Noel grasped Lucy's hand to her chest. 'Me.'

Lucy's tears spilled over. Finding a space on the bed she sat down and gathered Noel to her, rocking and hugging tight. She asked the question she had put so disastrously the first time. 'Why did you try and do it all yourself? What on earth made you think you could?'

Cheek smarting against her mother's shoulder Noel said, 'I thought helping him might help me. I didn't think of the consequences.'

Lucy held her tight. 'It was a silly thing to do.'