Bab 170: Wet
A mansion on the outskirts of Miami.
A spatial wormhole silently appeared on the road beside the mansion.
Blake, Tony, and Thor stepped out of the wormhole.
As soon as they arrived, Tony instructed Jarvis to scan the mansion.
The scanning results showed that there wasn't a single heat source exceeding the standard within the mansion.
This indicated that there was no sign of an Extremis-enhanced warrior present.
"If the tracking results weren't wrong, it seems like we're a step too late again!"
"We'll know for sure once we go in and take a look!"
Blake took the lead, kicking the door open and stepping inside.
The mansion was heavily guarded, with numerous black-clad men patrolling armed with handguns.
However, against three Avengers capable of flying, teleporting, and being impervious to bullets, their resistance was no more effective than wielding foam shields against firearms.
The trio headed straight for the inner house, taking down any resisters with ease, walking as if they owned the place until they reached a room on the top floor.
Pushing the door open, they found the so-called Mandarin lying on a bed, sound asleep, with two women in his arms.
Blake casually picked up the two women—models that Killian had somehow recruited—and tossed them to the floor. Ignoring their screams, he frowned as he looked at the Mandarin, still sleeping soundly on the bed.
"Thor, give him a wake-up call he won't forget. Not too much power—just enough to wake him up!"
Hearing Blake's words, Thor nodded, stepped onto the bed, placed Mjölnir above the Mandarin's groin, and lightly tapped the hammer with his hand.
A small bolt of electricity, no thicker than a cotton swab, zapped directly onto the Mandarin's groin.
"OOOWWW!"
The Mandarin jerked awake with a howl, sitting up in a panic.
"Oh! Who was that? Damn, that felt amazing! Which little sweetheart woke me up this way? What did you use, some new kind of toy?"
Still groggy, the so-called Mandarin hadn't fully opened his eyes and was wearing an expression of enjoyment.
This left Thor utterly speechless. If he could, he would've smashed the man's face with Mjölnir right then and there.
But since they couldn't kill him, Thor could only helplessly look at Blake.
Blake shrugged. "He says he enjoys it, so give him another round!"
This time, the lightning was at least twice as strong as before. As the current surged into the Mandarin's groin, Blake could even hear the crackling sparks as the electricity hit flesh.
"AAARRRGH!"
The Mandarin's eyes flew wide open this time, his expression shifting from fear to emptiness, then to bewilderment, and finally to bliss.
To put it simply, it was the kind of expression you'd make after holding in your pee for forty minutes and finally finding a restroom, releasing it in a moment of utter relief.
Sure enough…
"Damn! That was a bit too much this time… I think I wet myself!"
As he spoke, the Mandarin reached into his pants, touched around, then brought his hand to his nose for a sniff.
"Damn! I really did wet myself. Haha! I should've taken a photo to commemorate this!"
*BANG!*
This so-called Mandarin was such a character…
His comment startled Thor so much that he jumped off the bed, but he didn't control his footing, and the entire bed collapsed with a crash!
Thor landed on the floor, tangled in the mattress.
It was only then that the Mandarin perked up and looked around.
"Huh? I don't think I've seen you guys before. Where are my girls? Are you actors too?"
*THUD!*
Tony fired a repulsor blast at a spot less than ten centimeters below the Mandarin's groin.
The mattress was instantly blasted, leaving a small pit that exposed the scorched springs underneath.
"If you don't want me to aim directly at your little friend down there…"
"I surrender! I surrender! I'm just an actor! Whatever you want to know, I'll tell you! I was hired to act—I haven't done anything wrong. They forced me into this!"
Before Tony could even finish his sentence, the Mandarin raised both his hands in surrender.
At that moment, footsteps echoed from the doorway. The three turned around to see it was Rhodey.
"They stole my suit—right now the President might be in danger, and I need to—wait, is that *the Mandarin*?"
Rhodey stopped mid-sentence when he noticed the Mandarin lying on the bed. He didn't know yet that this was just a puppet.
Worried about the President's safety, Colonel Rhodes immediately demonstrated his military instincts. He rushed forward and delivered a powerful kick, sending the Mandarin sprawling face-first onto the floor.
Rhodey pinned him down with a knee to his back, yanked his arms behind him, and tore off a strip of the bedsheet using his teeth.
With swift efficiency, he tied the Mandarin's hands behind his back and pressed the barrel of his handgun to the back of the Mandarin's head, coldly saying, "Tell me your plan!"
The whole process took less than two seconds. As Rhodey finished speaking, Blake, Tony, and Thor all took two synchronized steps back, leaving at least a two-meter distance between themselves and Rhodey.
"What are you guys doing?"
Instead of answering Rhodey's question, the Mandarin kept wailing in pain. Rhodey noticed the trio's odd behavior and asked in confusion.
"Well… I gave him a couple of light electric shocks earlier, and, uh, I think he wet himself!"
"Yep, right on that bed!"
"He even touched it himself. Oh, by the way, did you grab his hand earlier? You might also want to check that bedsheet you tore—does it feel a bit damp?"
The three spoke one after another, and after hearing their words, Rhodey's expression froze.
His eyes widened in disbelief as he looked down at his hands, then cautiously pinched the strip of fabric used to tie the Mandarin's hands.
"AAAAHHHHH! I'LL KILL YOU, YOU BASTARD!"
"Calm down, Rhodey, calm down! He can't die just yet. Take it easy. Also, if you're going to talk, please keep your hands away from me. I don't care if we're friends—I'll draw the line there!"
After this little interlude—and thanks to the Mandarin's disorganized ramblings, likely due to the large amount of drugs he'd consumed before sleeping—it took the group over 20 minutes to piece everything together.
They learned that the stolen War Machine suit had been taken aboard Air Force One, where the President was held hostage.
Rhodey had already confirmed through his contacts that Air Force One had indeed been compromised a few hours earlier, and the President's whereabouts were now unknown.
The group also discovered that the villains planned to execute the President publicly, under the Mandarin's name, during a live broadcast that night. The execution was set to take place on a ship called the *Nork*, an old oil tanker belonging to the now-defunct Roxxon Oil Company.
Two years ago, the ship had spilled a massive amount of crude oil into the ocean. It had since been abandoned at a derelict dock in South Florida, making it an excellent secret base.
Natasha and Pepper were also being held on the ship, so everyone was now united in their goal.
"The only problem is, they've got a large number of Extremis-enhanced soldiers. They're practically unkillable and can breathe fire! And I've lost my suit—we're outnumbered!"
As Rhodey spoke, he furiously sprayed disinfectant on his hands, as if trying to cleanse his soul.
"That's true. Even someone like Cap would struggle against them. But we have two literal gods on our side!"
Tony gestured toward Blake and Thor.
"Plus, who said we're outnumbered? Jarvis, prep everything—we're throwing a family reunion!"
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