The skies were clear. The sun shone radiantly over the dense forest creating an ephemeral and cozy atmosphere. All sorts of animals prance around. The warm breeze gently caressed the leaves. It was peaceful. Except there's one problem.
I'm currently running for my life right now. What? Why? You're probably asking. Where do I start? I hope you have time... Cause its going to be a long one.
Do you know what happens when you poke a bear with a stick? Does it chase you and eat you? Does it maul you towards a tree and decorate the forest with your innards?
Who knows, one things for sure though... you're kinda fucked. So imagine if you will. That stick is replaced by a sword, and the imaginary bear is replaced with a very real and gigantic undead skeleton. What's gonna happen to me? Do I even have to spell it out for you? I'm a goner, I'm Kaput, goodbye, sayonara my friend... I don't even have the time to explain how fucked I am.
So now you're probably wondering... Why you should care. Who the fuck am I anyways? Why am I acting like a condescending asshole right now? I'm about to die my guy. Consider it my last rites.
Anyways The name's Kaz. What? You need more than that? Fine.
The greatest fucking mercenary in the galaxy, Kazama Haruki! Some call me Wolf. But I like to keep it simple. You can call me Kaz or Handsome for short.
Well anyways now that the introductions are over I'd like to face my death now.
What do you mean wait? You want to know how I got here? Alright I guess.
Like all cool things it all started with a heist. Why is a mercenary doing a heist? Don't mind the small details! Being nitpicky won't land you any guys/girls anytime soon. Besides anything that smells like money I'm in it. Oh! Get your mind outta the gutter.
And like all heists it went down into shit real fast. We probably pulled off a universal record with how fast things went to shit. Some time skip and Bingo bango now I'm here. Fin!
What the fuck do you mean elaborate!? Jerbils on a pancake! Alright! Geez let's start in earnest!
"Hey Kaz! Stop zoning out and focus!"
A female voice entered his ears anchoring him back to reality. He looked towards his left and saw a captivating blonde woman leaning on a tree near him. Her knife-like ears twitched as she tried to detect the monster chasing them.
He stared at her wooden bow with golden engravings as the silver arrows shone in a golden and holy glimmer. The elven woman pulled back the string as the forest trees swayed and the leaves rustled.
The loud thuds slowly came closer and closer. Most of the animals that were prancing around has already ran far away. The thick stench of death permeated the forest. A misty violet fog shrouded the once bright place. The sun's rays were suddenly shrouded leaving only but a dim flicker.
"Newbie! Stop daydreaming! Draw your damn sword!"
The elven woman said as she fired her arrows towards the giant undead. With a metallic clink the arrows bounced off leaving nothing but a small scratch on its skull.
The undead skeleton tilted its head as it raised the gigantic axe it was holding. With a strong swing and a forceful tempest that followed blew away the surrounding flora. The two were also tussled around as they rolled on the ground a few times as the weapon breezed past them by a hair's breadth.
They regained their footing only to find themselves caught dead in their tracks in an open space. The two dusted themselves off and Haruki with a small smile said. "You know what I like to do in moments like these? I imagine we're on a show. It's the first episode and the main character is in a tight situation. Then the character blabbers on showing his origin story and what not. Spanning several episodes until they reach the current predicament. Giving the Writers ample enough time to figure out how the main character will solve it." he said in one breath blabbering on as the gigantic skeleton towered above the two of them.
The elven woman chuckled as she stared at the gigantic arm approaching. "I don't wanna die singleeeee!!!!!! Fuck you newbie! It's all your fault!" The elven woman protested. Haruki shrugged his shoulders and stepped forwards.
"Well, That's a cheap studio trick anyways. This is most certainly the first episode of a horror thriller. Besides, if you want to... You won't die single."
He said with absolute confidence and a cocky smirk. The elven woman rolled her eyes and continued to fire holy arrows doing nothing but scratch the enormous monstrosity.
Haruki finally drew the blade strapped to his waist. It was a blood red blade and had black guard and handle. The blade slightly vibrated as the dim sunlight bounced off its edges.
"I guess the writer is an amateur. Still hasn't thought of a solution..."
He said as he dashed towards the gigantic skeleton. However, it's massive frame made others think that it's speed as subpar. That isn't the case for this one. It easily swatted Haruki away with its palm slamming him towards a nearby tree.
A large palm print was left bending the tree slightly. Haruki slowly slid down from the tree, his blood pouring all over. He coughed a mouthful of blood as he knelt on the ground.
"Fuck! You're supposed to freeze there and show my back story..."
He groaned as he slowly stood up. He brandished his blade and dashed towards the skeletons legs. "You're supposed to be slow! Follow the fucking script!" He bellowed as he slashed at its feet. His blade cut deep but not enough for the skeleton to be truly injured.
The elven woman stared at the idiot tirelessly hacking away at the skeletons feet. "If I manage to live another day. I'll demote you... Didn't you read the manual?!? Undead are weak to holy magic! Bless your weapon and aim at its spine or head!"
Haruki then stared at her in a daze. "Why didn't you tell me this earlier?" The elven woman's shoulders drooped. "Three times..." She said in a whisper. "I told you three fucking times! But you're too busy flirting with the barmaids! That's it you're demoted two ranks!"
"Boo! You're a terrible superior I'll report you to HR!" He said in protest. He leapt backwards and landed beside the elven woman. She looked at him with a burning glare. "Coat your blade with holy magic now!"
He looked at her straight in the eye and raised his left eyebrow. "How can you demote me when I just joined? I literally have the lowest rank."
The elven woman looked at him then and then stated at the giant skeleton with hollowed eyes. "Oh wow. I'm turning 137 this year and I still haven't snagged a man. This is how it ends?" She let out a dry chuckle as the skeleton once more brandished its blade.
Haruki stepped forwards and steadied his stance. As if he was anticipating the monsters blade. His eyes turned ferocious as his posture lowered. His blade glistened from the sun's rays peeking through the tall forest trees.
As the blade neared at an absurd speed Haruki's eyes lit up and said. "Oh wait, shit. I Don't know any magi-...-iiiiiiiiiiiiiiicc!!!!! " His voice echoed as he was flung across the dense forest.
The elven woman gawked at her moronic companion. After a few seconds the regained a bit of clarity and gave the giant skeleton a beautiful smile as she turned tail and ran towards the opposite direction. The Giant skeleton growled as it turned his head. However he ignored the elf and focused on the annoying human. Its steps moved further and further away from her. She heaved a sigh of relief and stared at the direction where Haruki was thrown.
She sighed and with a glare flung a middle finger in his general direction and stomped her way back home.
Haruki on the other hand was lodged quite deep in a tree. He groaned and pushed himself out of the haruki sized hole he was in. He streched his body and wiped off the blood. He grinned at the towering monster above him. "Alright enough games. I've played around long enough. I just wanted to see how strong you really are big guy." He said with stark confidence that nothing will ever go wrong.
The giant skeleton's eyesockets shone a nasty red light at his blatant provocation. Haruki waved his blade in the air as he approached the monster. The two stared at each other in silence waiting for the other to move.
"I'm going to beat the shit out of you bone head." It was probably not the best of lines but it'll do in this situation. Nobody was watching him after all. Besides, even if someone was, he still wouldn't make the cut.
However before the fight reaches its climax we must first know who the man really is.
"Hold on... Are you ramping up to something?" He said trying to delay the inevitable. We must first know how he came onto this peculiar situation.
"Are you seriously going to have a flashback just as I'm going to fight an actual boss!? You couldn't have done this earlier!? When I needed it!? Waiiiiittt!!!"
They called Him The Wolf of Ragnarok. One of the greatest mercenaries to ever tread the galaxy. Kazama Haruki. Thus his tale begins in the next chapter.