Bab 7: I missed you
Jackson
She said I had no right to come back into her life. Too bad, I have a habit of doing exactly what people tell me not to do. Huh! Who is she to tell me whether I have the right or not? I should've reminded her of last night. Then she wouldn't have the face to talk like that with me. I smiled to myself thinking about last night.
'Who are you? Are you an angel?' She'd asked still in my car.
'Where is your home?' I might've asked for the tenth time then.
Her smile was goofy and there was no answer. I asked the driver to park in a parking lot of a nearby shopping mall and then take a cab back home. He gave me a disapproving look before leaving probably doubting my intentions for Cordelia but left anyway because his job was to follow my orders. There was no way he was going to put his well-paying job in jeopardy for someone he barely knew.
I put Cordelia in the front seat and sat in the driver's seat myself. Shaking her a bit by holding her shoulder I tried to ask where she lived but she was adamant about not telling me. 'We will have to spend the night here if you don't tell me your address.' I said sighing.
'Then let's stay here.' She said softly. Her eyes were closed and a smile lingered on her face. I caressed her cheek carefully. She always looked innocent while asleep. I was a fan of her sleeping smile back then and was even now. I'm supposed to hate her but my heart once in a while did rebel against me. Today was one such day.
Withdrawing my hand I took out my cell phone and texted Claire to find out where Cordelia lived. My secretary made sure to remind me how I was a stalker and that she was not going to be part of this. Then I sent her a picture of Cordelia. 'Did you kidnap her?' I rolled my eyes. Why did this woman think only wrong of me?
I texted back, 'No, I didn't. She was drunk and I'm dropping her home.'
'You don't even know where her home is.'
'Save the sarcasm. Just do your job, Claire.' I think she considered Cordelia's state and set her ethics aside for I had Cordelia's address in the next five minutes.
'You already had it. Then why didn't you give me before?'
'Because I don't compromise sensitive information.'
I dropped the phone in the holder and then was about to start the car when Cordelia's hand stopped me. I shivered at the mere touch. When I turned to look at her she asked, 'Can we not stay here for a while?' Her eyes were devoid of light.
'Are you sad about something?'
'I don't tell strangers about my personal life.' Now she wasn't slurring or stammering. Maybe the alcohol was rubbing off.
Her facial expressions weren't visible clearly but her voice was saying there was something. 'Don't worry I'll drop you home.'
'There is no home.'
'Huh?'
'I said I don't have a home.'
'Why do you say that?' I knew for sure it was because of the reason that she had to leave home. But what was that reason?
She closed her eyes again and sighed. 'My dad, he...' She shifted her head and then opened her eyes to look straight into mine. 'What if one day you get to know your parents have been keeping a secret from you? Something, that will make you question your existence!'
'My existence is in itself a big question.' I told her. In answer to the lines on her forehead, I said, 'I don't know who my parents are.'
She chuckled. 'How is that possible? You don't know who your parents are? What a joke!' I gritted my teeth. Even in a semi-consciousness state, she made fun of my vulnerability. Grabbing her hair I pulled her towards me. Her eyes spanned out. 'What are you doing?'
'Cordelia Rosette, remember this carefully when you wake up in the morning.' I said and took her lower lip as if I intended to hold it hostage. She fidgeted and then pushed me away.
'How dare you?!'
'These big eyes, raised brows and those gritted teeth make you look so fucking attractive.' I breathed those words and her breathing became heavy.
'Jackson!' She said my name and I wanted to grab her again. But today was not the day for this. No matter how much she irked me, I had to consider that she was drunk.
I asked, 'Now you know who I am?'
But then she said, 'Or is it, you Andrew?' My mind stopped working. Who the fuck is Andrew?
'Who is that?'
She scoffed. 'I bet it is you, Andrew. What do you want now? Aren't we over? You said it yourself!' So this chicken that she is naming is her ex.
'I'm not Andrew. I'm….'
'I don't care who you are.' She cut me and then went on to turn her head to look out the window.
'Why did you break up with Andrew?' Why were you even dating him in the first place?
'Because when you're looking at sunflowers but seeing dandelions you know your mind is fucked up.'
Since when did she do poetry? Her words made me scrunch up my face. 'What are you talking about?'
'I was missing someone, you stupid.' My heart suddenly was feeling bubbles.
'Missing someone? Who?'
She turned back again and I licked my lips in anticipation. 'Jackson Carter.' A smile was threatening to appear on my lips but then a tear rolled down her left cheek. 'I miss that bastard.'
I didn't realize I was holding my breath until I heard my phone buzz. It was a text from Claire. I put my hands on the steering wheel. 'Time to go home, Cordelia.'
Thankfully she had a key in her bag and I could fetch it easily or I would have to drop her there right outside her door. It was when I opened the door to her home that I realized how grave her situation was. Everything there was the bare minimum. The furniture was all second-hand and the wallpaper on the wall was soiled from the top corners probably due to water leakage. The bed was the only thing that seemed new. I laid her down gently on the comfy mattress. How did I know it was comfortable? Well, I needed a little something as a memory of this night so I…..
After she was sound asleep I removed my jacket and went to sleep on the couch outside. A smirk lingered on my lips and I closed my eyes. The look on her face would be worth seeing first thing in the morning.
To pull me out of last night's memory, Claire slammed a bunch of files on my table. I shook my head and stared at her. 'Where's your mind at?' She asked her arms crossed in front and her face stoic.
'Just thinking about some project.'
'I bet it is named Cordelia Rosette'
'I'm not thinking about her.'
'Sure.'
'Claire…..'
She sighed loudly. 'Sir, let me be clear about this. Yesterday was the last time I helped you with something illegal. It won't be happening again.'
'Your point is….'
She pressed her lips together. 'Talk to her like a human being instead of being an asshole.'
I scoffed. 'You just called your boss an asshole!'
'I can't help it if he is one.' She picked up the files and left me stunned that I was bullied by my secretary. I scoffed again. What the heck!
During lunch, I went outside my cabin where Claire was sitting at her work desk and….wait! She was playing a video game!
'Last time I checked this was not allowed in my office.' She jumped and I narrowed my eyes at her.
'You scared me. Anyways, it's lunchtime so I'm not wasting any of my office hours. You can't object to this.'
'I'm the BOSS here, Claire!'
'That I know. But I'm an employee of this corporation and not your slave. This is my free time I will do whatever I want to.'
Sighing, I asked her if she had lunch and she shook her head to say no. 'Then let's grab something to eat. I'm hungry.'
At the restaurant I let her pick something of her choice for the both of us. I didn't want to be criticized by her again considering she was particular about her diet. While we were waiting for the food to arrive I asked her, 'So Claire….'
'Hmm?' She was still scanning the menu, probably thinking about what feedback she should leave after we finish eating.
'If a girl….' This caught her attention and she finally looked at me. So I continued, 'If a girl tells a guy that she misses him. What does that mean?'
She blinked several times before making a face and I knew she was going to call me…. 'You're an idiot or what.' Yup, I was right. 'If a girl says she misses the guy then she misses him. What else could it mean?'
'No, but what if this girl, hates the guy or has hated him all her life? Then?'
'Why would she miss a guy who she hates?'
'Exactly! This is what I have been thinking. Why would Cor…..' I stopped mid-sentence.
Claire said, 'So it is about Cordelia.'
'No.'
She rolled her eyes. 'If you want love advice I might not be the best person because I work under a boss who is a workaholic and doesn't let me have a normal life. But since you've already asked and I'm under an obligation to help you always I will be kind enough to answer your query.' Great, as usual, she didn't leave a chance to emphasize how much I make her work. 'She's pretending to hate you.'
I straightened up on the chair. 'What did you say?'
'If she said she misses you I think she must be pretending to hate you. Maybe you did something to piss her off and her heart broke and…..'
'No need to make me an asshole here, she was equally responsible for whatever happened.'
Claire leaned in and clasped her hands together. 'What exactly happened between the two of you?'
I gulped. 'Sorry but it's personal.'
'You like her too.'
I scoffed. 'No, I don't. I have always hated her.'
'Someone who claims to hate her would not protect the personal details. They would go on broadcasting them for the world to know how bad the other person is.' She was right but I didn't want to share my past with her because I'd promised myself I would stop after the last day of Cordelia and my confrontation years back. Everything was said and done, now we were only connected by one person and it was Mr. Takahashi, who wanted her and me to get married and that we will.
PERTIMBANGAN PENCIPTA 
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