Bab 23: Chapter Twenty-Two
I didn't know where to go, all I knew was that I needed to get away. Now. It didn't take me long to find a stairway and I just kept climbing the stairs, taking two at a time, until I reached the top floor and opened the door that led to the roof. The wind began to whip my hair around immediately, sending a chill through me, but I didn't care, I couldn't.
Derek and Meredith's conversation just kept running over and over again in my head. Hearing him help her figure out my secret when he knew damn well that I wanted to keep it quiet. To think, I'd been so close to telling him, so close to actually being honest with him again.
"GOD!" I yelled out, just out of pure frustration. My voice was only lost in the sounds of traffic below that floated upwards. Not knowing what else to do I just began to pace around the roof, continually running my hands through my hair. I knew that my hands were shaking, but I ignored it, just as I was ignoring the growing pain in my head. I could deal with the pain, I could just push it down and ignore it, pretending as though it weren't even there. That was what I as good at, it was my talent.
The noise from the traffic below floated upwards, seeming to transport me into a world that was entirely different from the mess that I was already in. Slowly I made my way over to the edge of the roof and found myself looking down below at the world playing out below me. I found myself looking down at the loading area outside the emergency room. An ambulance had just pulled up and I watched as doctors hurried to pull the patient out.
It was a young boy with blood seeming to be all over him, even soaking through the gauze that had been used to wrap his abdomen and head. I couldn't hear what the paramedics and doctors were saying as he was rushed in, but I didn't have to. Instead I felt my pager go off on my hip and I looked down to see that it was a nine-one-one to the OR.
I hurriedly wiped my fingers underneath my eyes, wanting to get rid of any stray tears before I hurried back inside. I practically ran down the stairs and changed into a spare set of scrubs in a supply closet. When I reached the scrub room outside OR one where some doctors were already scrubbing in while the patient was prepped.
"What do we got?" I asked as I pulled my hair up into a bun and covered it with a disposable scrub cap.
"Chris Yostiles, was in a car accident with his parents and went through the windshield." I glanced over at Hunt as he continued to scrub in while I began myself, Karev on my other side. "Severe abdominal trauma and a bad head laceration. Won't know how bad it is until we get in there."
"What about his parents?" I asked.
"I heard that his mother walked away fine, but Bailey's next door with his father." Karev informed me.
"We don't have time to get a CT?" I asked as I glanced into the operating room, my stomach knotting slightly.
"Not unless we want him to bleed out." Hunt shook his head before heading into the OR, Karev and I following behind him.
〰〰〰
"I need more suction, this is a mess." Karev muttered the last part, nearly two hours into the surgery. He and Hunt were still hard at work on the kid's abdominal injuries while I dealt with a brain hemorrhage.
"How are you doing there, Howard?" Hunt asked me.
"I am baffled by the stupidity of people nowadays." I told them. "What kind of parents wouldn't make their kid, a teenager, wear their seatbelt? If he'd just been wearing a seatbelt he'd likely be out in the waiting room with his mother, but no. Now he's here with a bleeding sushi brain and has a chance of losing his memory or ability to speak, that is if he doesn't die here, on the table, or become brain dead. You would just think that people would think more before they did something so stupid."
"That's a lot of fire you got there," I saw Hunt glance up at me for a moment before returning his eyes to the surgical field before him. "Is something bothering you? I thought you'd be happy, what, with Sloan waking up."
"Yeah," Karev chimed in. "About that, does Sloan's waking up mean that you aren't quitting anymore? Because, if you're not-"
"Hold on, you're quitting?" Hunt cut in, now looking up at me with surprise filling his eyes. "You just started, when were you going to tell me this?"
"I was on my way to your office when I heard about Mark." I informed him. "Between that and being called in for an emergency surgery there wasn't much time to talk."
"Howard, look, you just had one bad surgery, everyone does." He tried to tell me as I continued to work, suctioning out some more blood before continuing. "That's not something to just quit over. We need your help around here, with Shepherd and Robbins out-"
"Just stop it, okay?" I looked up at him, stopping my work again to talk to him. "I'm not in the mood for some crappy pep talk, okay? So just save your breath because whatever heartwarming crap you have in your head isn't going to change my mind. After this surgery I'm done, I'm heading back home. No questions asked."
"What about Derek and Mark?" Karev asked, despite my telling them not to.
"I can stay updated on Mark's condition from home and if Derek wants anything then he can kiss my ass." I shrugged as I did the last bit that I needed. Now it was just time for me to close up the kid's head and wait to see if he'd wake up with full or partial function later.
"What happened there?" Karev raised a brow at me. "Don't tell me that McDreamy lost his touch with the women."
"McDreamy is a McAss." I scoffed.
"What am I missing here?" Hunt asked.
"Why don't you ask Derek? I'm sure he'll share everything. Or, maybe you could ask Meredith?" I suggested, working in stitching the boy's head.
"I'm asking you." He shook his head.
"You're missing the fact that Derek and I haven't spoken to one another since he moved here, yet, you hired me at his recommendation." I began to list off. "You're missing the fact that you don't know anything about me, but you hired me anyways. You're missing that you hired me while I was sitting vigil at my best friend's bedside, waiting to see if he'd die or wake back up. You're missing the fact that up until this week I hadn't operated in more than five and a half years."
"What?" Hunt and Karev's heads snapped up at my words, their eyes seeming to triple in size from shock.
"Right, Derek doesn't know that so neither did you." I stepped away from the operating table and headed towards the door, putting off my gloves and operating gown and putting them in the desired bin. "Just like how none of you knew that I was just fired from a job as a surgical consultant, not an operating surgeon."
I didn't give either of them a chance to say a word in response before I stormed out of the OR. My job in there was done and I didn't want to be in there for another second, open to being asked more questions, ones that I didn't want to have to answer. Instead I just made my through the hospital and towards the waiting room to find the boy's mother to update her. As I walked out into the waiting room I pulled off my surgical mask and looked around.
"Chris Yostiles?" I called out the boy's name and saw an older woman's head snap up, her eyes wide.
"I'm his mother. How is he? Is he okay?" She asked when I reached her side.
"Miss Yostiles I'm Dr. Howard, I'm with the hospital Neuro department. I just finished operating on your son, but the other doctors are still with him." I introduced myself as I sat in the empty chair next to her. "Chris was brought in with serious abdominal injuries, as well as a brain hemorrhage, meaning that his brain was bleeding. This was caused by his impact when he was slung out of the car during the accident. I was able to stop the bleeding and repair the damage to the best of my capabilities, but you should be prepared. The brain is tricky to work with so there are various possibilities for Chris, if he wakes up. He could suffer from temporary or permeant memory loss, problems with his speech and/or hearing, as well as sight."
"You said if he wakes up?" Her voice broke.
"Yes," I rested my hand over hers. "There is a chance that the other doctors are able to fix any damage from his other injuries, but he still doesn't wake up. Chris, he could be brain dead."
"No," she shook her head, a fresh wave of tears shining in her eyes. "This can't be happening, it can't be. We were just going out for lunch. Chris got straight A's so Andrew and I agreed to take him out to lunch as a reward. None of this was supposed to happen....What about Andrew? How is he? Is he going to be okay?"
"I'm not sure," I admitted. "Other doctors are still in surgery with him, I'm sure someone will be out soon to give you an update on him. Everyone's working extremely hard."
There was nothing else I could say as the woman just sat there next to me, crying from her fear for her family. Her fear that they may not survive. Slowly I got to my feet and began out of the room, just needing to get away from the tears and the sense of desperation that radiated within the four walls. As I turned down the hall though, I found myself coming face to face with the last person that I wanted to see.
Status Power Mingguan
-- Peringkat
Power 
-- Power
stone