Bab 15: Reasonings
With the knife clutched hard in his hand, sitting above her, Leander looked at those eyes that bloomed like a waterlily on a dark night. The slight beeping sound around him reduced and he could once again hear the sound of his heartbeat ramming against his chest alone.
He froze, not knowing what to do. The adrenaline which always helped him cope with extraordinary situations went on vacation right that moment when her eyes opened. His mind… if he was connected to a machine that could measure his brainwaves, it would have flatlined.
And just like that, he was abandoned in the company of his heart.
Maybe he was listening to his heart all along. Because one swift slit to her throat and a brief struggle for around ten seconds, she would have been dead five minutes ago. And yet, here he is…
'Everyone has a plan 'till they get punched in the mouth. Then, like a rat, they stop in fear and freeze.'
Leander fully understood Mike Tyson's famous quote only now. Till now, he never had an experience where he faced fear.
He was the lion. When he roared, everyone in front of him trembled and kneeled in front of him. He was never scared of anyone or anything.
And for the first time, he froze in fear. What made him afraid, he didn't know. But her eyes instilled fear in his heart.
Or…
It may not be fear. It was something unfamiliar to him—the way her eyes made him feel. Like how he was unaccustomed to fear, he was unaccustomed to the way he feels when he looks into her eyes.
Maybe, that's what scares him—that uncertainty.
She started coughing. He kept on staring at her. The liveliness of her eyes. Although she was in pain and confused, it is much better than when she was lying motionless with her eyes closed.
Does she not remember who I am?
And when she repeated it, he wanted to laugh.
She does not remember me!
He didn't know why that made him happy. That weird feeling in his heart that scared him was replaced with unfounded joy. He threw away the knife in his hand and it slid and ended up at the door.
SHE DOES NOT REMEMBER ME!
He cupped her cheeks so that her restless eyes would end up on him. He didn't even realize that he was grinning ear to ear.
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Viviana was drifting off into the deep sea for a long time. It was dark around her and she was hovering on the surface of the deep sea. Hovering… that can't be it. One cannot hover on water. But that's where she was. In that vast place of nothing but still water, there was no partition between the water and sky; in there, she drifted peacefully.
But she felt like she was tethered somewhere to the bottom of that stillness. At times, there would be a tug in her chest followed by a pain that would go away on its own. But most times, she was just happy staying there.
At times, the tether pulled her deeper into the water. But she didn't want to sink. She wanted to stay in this place forever.
After being there for what seemed to be an eternity, she felt a change. On the horizon, there was light. She found the brightness threatening. She had learned to love the nothingness and darkness around her. The stillness had an allure. She couldn't see anything and that means she didn't have to worry about anything.
But…
The familiar giggles were heard as the horizon lit up with blue streaks of light rays. It was beautiful, like the Northern lights, and she wanted to get closer to the lights.
Her heart started to pound hearing the giggles that she longed to hear for a long time. She had missed the smiles and fun times they shared. And most of all, she missed looking into those eyes very much. Those were the eyes that always assured her, and those beautiful slender arms protected her when she needed protection.
But her personal guardian angel; Archangel Michael, who always covered her with those protective wings is no more.
She was waiting to meet her Leo again…Always… But her Leo didn't want to meet her and saved her each time.
'No, not this time! Take me, Leo… Let's be together forever like you promised…'
The tether to the bottom tugged her hard trying to sink her into the water. But she dragged herself toward the horizon where her Leo is. She swam and swam, with the hope to get closer to her Leo, and with each stroke, her arms went tired. Her legs felt like someone was straddling on top of her and within some time, her arms stopped moving too.
She floated on the surface of the deep sea like a log.
'Leo!!!'
She screamed as loud as she could. The bright blue light rays she saw on the horizon started to dim and the happy noises of two kids faded away into the abyss.
'No! Leo! Don't leave me!'
She screamed. She started to sink inside the water and struggled to stay afloat. On the horizon amidst the happy noises that were fading to whispers much to her dismay, she heard the pouty voice of a boy that echoed in the twilight.
[Why can't I be Michael? He is the coolest Archangel! I want to be Michael!]
Viviana very well remembered that pouty and snooty boy she once met when she was very young.
Leander Kastello.
She was not going to let him do as he pleases—that snooty, elitist prick! His snooty tantrum was followed by her unrelenting proclamation. She was not going to let anyone else take her Leo's place.
With her chest puffed and face filled with disgust for the boy who was wearing more jewelry than the archbishop, she proclaimed—No, Leo is Michael! You are not welcome in our group. Get lost, Kastello!
She remembered hating the Kastello name even at the tender age of seven. And that never changed as she grew up. They gave her every reason to.
Darkness surrounded her as she was pulled to the bottom of the deep sea. Her chest hurt and that pain spread throughout her body. Her back stung as if someone had lashed her.
The strong force pulled her to the deepest part of the ocean against her struggles. And then she woke up.
And there he was… Leander Kastello.
Well, it can't be him…
She knows Leander Kastello. That man wouldn't have left her alive after what she did. And so, the man on top of her looking the same as Leander Kastello, must not be Leander Kastello.
There could be a lot of explanations. She might have transmigrated to another universe where there is a person who looks exactly like Leander Kastello. Universe? It could be a romance novel… Then this handsome man must be the male lead…Or the villain.
It truly cannot be Leander Kastello. She died and she is somewhere else.
And so, she asked the question. "Who are you?" It took her some tries to get it out. Her throat hurt. Her chest hurt because of the severe cold.
'I jumped into the river and must have woken up in another world!'
She concluded in a spectacularly brilliant way. She probably was pushed into the river by her nasty stepsister, or a love rival, she thought.
Because certainly, the Leander Kastello she knew wouldn't grin like an idiot looking at her!
Not after what she did.
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