Bab 2: 1. THE UGLY BRIDE & THE HANDSOME PRINCE
JELA
I feel nothing even after he cups my face and takes me into a fierce kiss. It's the kind of kiss that takes a heroine's breath away in all the novels I read, one that involves tongues, a lot of biting and moaning(not mine). But I feel nothing but numbness. The last time when I checked, I was here kissing Ridge, just to feel that numbness so that I could put aside all other emotions and continue being numb.
"Umm.." He moaned; his hands traveled south towards my private part.
I immediately pushed him away. "What are you doing?" I ask.
His hair became messy. It was like he was in a daze till now. I don't understand how he could feel so many things with just one kiss that he momentarily lost himself, and I feel nothing at all.
His eyes fell on where he tried to touch before. "I thought that's what you need." He said in confusion.
I can't help but roll my eyes as I fold my hands across my chest. "No," I said sternly. "And you can't even touch it in this dress, Ridge," I told him. "And we will regret it later."
"I know." He sighed and started to fix his hair while looking into the giant mirror my parents brought for me.
I scoffed, looking at him, fixing himself as if what's going to happen is his marriage.
"It's not your marriage." I reminded him.
"I know. But I am the bride's best friend. I should make myself presentable. Who knows? I might find a bride soon."
Once he was done, he turned towards me, extending his hands as if he was showing himself. Truth to be admitted, he looks dashingly handsome. Ridge has always been the college's lover boy. The blonde hair with asymmetrical bangs, hazel eyes, dimpled smile, and fair complexion only made the black suit he wears look more sophisticated and glorious.
He laughed, flashing his dimples while I struggled to fix my veil. "That's not how you do it." He said and walked to my back.
"I did it for Shyla." He says while he replaced all the displaced pins in my hair. For a brief moment, none of us talked anything. His marriage with Shyla ended up breaking his heart. And I have no idea what my marriage could do to me. Although, this is not the typical marriage where a girl and boy say vows and mean it at least for that one day.
"Relax." He whispers in my ears, his hand rubbing my arm.
"I don't want to be relaxed," I stated. "I want to feel numb. I need it now more than anything. Kiss me again." I ask him.
He took a step back, clearly surprised. "Who does that, Jela? Kiss a man because they want to feel numb?" He asked me.
Exactly. Who does that? Me. Jela, the shameless daughter of Leo, does all this weird stuff. Ridge checked his watch. "It's high time." He said.
I pushed back whatever emotion that was trying to seep into me and concentrated on the kiss he gave me. I close my eyes to take a deep breath and remember how it felt when his tongue is in my mouth. Numbness. Peace.
My door opened, and my dad, Leo entered without a knock. His steps stopped in the mid-way when he noticed that I wasn't alone.
"What the hell is he doing here?" He barked at me. "Can't you be alone without a man for at least one second?"
He turned towards Ridge furiously. "Who are you?" He asks.
What kind of father doesn't know his daughter's best friend? Leo, the father of Jela does.
"I called him," I replied before Ridge could say anything. "I want him to walk me down the aisle."
"Get out." He snapped at Ridge.
Two words are what it takes to scare him. "I'll wait outside." He mouthed to me and left the room.
Leo took two long strides, and I was against a wardrobe; his large hand was gripping my neck. He chokes me hard, making me suffocate. That's what you get when you show a man where he failed like how I showed my father that he has failed at his job to be a dad.
"You don't play with me, understand?" He grits his teeth. He looked ugly this close. Because he has my eyes. In other words, I have his eyes- chocolate brown. I hate how I resemble him. I hate how I got his hair- pure black and long. If he didn't cut his hair, he can grow it like me- till the waist.
"Your cute little boyfriend will not stop this marriage. And the man at the end of the aisle will take you even if you are a wh.." His voice trailed off as he released me from his grip.
Look who is following the father code. He didn't use the word whore. But the fact that he thinks that I am a whore doesn't change. It doesn't matter anymore for I have habituated to his accusations since my childhood. The more he calls me something I am not, the more I want to become that and rile him up.
"Now, make haste." He ordered.
I removed the veil and untie the hair to cover his marks on my neck. I couldn't be at ease until they fade. But for now, I will settle with covering them. Leo glared at me before going away from the room.
"Violet," He called my sister, "Can you help her with her hair and make her look presentable?"
"Yes, papa." Came her sweet voice from the outside.
Violet is in a purple-colored bridesmaid dress. She looks extra cute today. Maybe it's because of her make-up and blonde hair. She looks more like a bride than I am.
As soon as she saw me, she closed her mouth with her hands, gasping loudly. I look around my room to find if there are any extinct species crawling on the floor. I didn't find any. So, I can't say why she has reacted like that.
"Oh, Jela. What have you done to your hair?" She asks me.
She rushed towards my side and started fixing my hair with her fingers. "We don't have time for this. You don't look like a bride. How many times have I asked you to cut this hair?"
"No." I snap keeping distance between us. Then I combed my hair. It doesn't look that bad. Maybe it does, but it doesn't deserve her horrific gasp.
The hair on my scalp was messed up since I removed the veil with so much force. Now I comb it so that every strand is in its place. I don't look any special. I look like a girl with silky long hair wearing a few kgs of a white gown.
Violet sighed again. She was so excited about my marriage than I am. I wish she is older and I, the younger. Because she was so ready for marriage, especially to the man who was standing at the end of the aisle in the name of my fiance. He will soon be my husband. But what's his name again?
"Bash looks stunning in his black suit. He is charming and mesmerizing. I don't know how a man like that was born. He probably had eight packs. Even in the suit, I could say that he is all rugged. So hard and.." And I hear her using all the synonyms for beautiful, handsome, and chisel to describe this Bash.
It isn't new to me. I often heard her talking about boys.
"Violet," I called her. She didn't hear my voice as she continued praising this manly Bash. So I have to hold he arms to catch her attention.
She looked at me angrily, or maybe there was a disappointment on her face. I don't know why it came. She was so excited about my marriage. I wonder if she would be once I was gone. We never had a great bond. I have been in the hostel for as long as I could remember. She is my parents' favorite child. So we are kind of two opposite poles. But I always wished she was different. I always wished she became my friend.
"What?" She asked sharply.
"What would you say if I don't want this marriage?" I ask her.
"Are you mad?" She snapped. "What kind of an idiot says no to this marriage. Do you have any idea what dad had gone through to secure this wedding? I know you are a rebel. But stop being ungrateful."
That's it. It is always about the family, business, and being grateful for they gave us birth. But lending a sperm to a woman necessarily doesn't make him a dad. For one last time, I thought I could say to my sister something heartful or I expected to say that she will miss me.
"And, even though it's not the marriage you dreamed of, try to be loyal to him."
I didn't say anything. It doesn't hurt either. She has the same opinion my father had of me, and here I was trying to say final goodbyes. In just an hour, I'll be done with this family. In another few months, I'll be done with whoever is waiting on the other side of the aisle.
"Who is bash, anyway?" I asked her before she got the chance to lecture me about how to be a good wife.
Once again, she looked like she had seen a ghost. "Are you kidding me?" She asks.
Three days back, she talked about Ian and I ask who he was. I don't know why she expects me to know every man under age thirty in our circle as if I have no better things to do.
*
I didn't remember when was the last time I needed his support. But today, it looked like I was clinging to my father. I am probably the ugliest bride in history. With long hair which hasn't dyed or curled, a long dress in which I looked like I was drowning, and shoes, oh no. I forget to take off the running shoes I had on before. And this white gown covered my feet so well that it would be hard to find out what I was wearing unless people or on some hunting mission.
I could say that everyone around me is looking for flaws, and I got many. My father is trying his best to convince me that it was because of some last-minute adjustments to my hair.
"Smile." He ordered as he hold my arm in his. "Raise your head and look at your man."
No. He is just a man. Not my man. I will never have a man.
But I obeyed his command. I looked up to the man who was standing at the other end. The first thing I noticed in him is his bluish-grey eyes. I am sure he used contact lenses. No one will have that kind of eyes. They are beautiful. He is looking into my eyes, his hands clasped together. His expression was stoic. I concentrate on his eyes. I look nowhere but them.
He is constantly fidgeting with his expensive watch. His eyes always travels down to his hands to check the time. I am glad there is another person who was as impatient as I am. My fiance.
Everything feels numb for me. I kept staring into his eyes as I thought about the kiss. Numbness.
At some point, the officiant asked if we have written our vows. My father would have made the world believe that we were so in love. No wonder the officiant thought we have our vows written for ourselves when the truth is we are two strangers who are getting into this marriage for their benefits. I might have no such benefit since I was blackmailed into this marriage. But this bluish-grey eyes guy is definitely getting a great deal of profit.
"I thought we were supposed to repeat what you have to say." It was the first time I heard him talk. His voice suits him well. It's deep and demanding. He is displaying some authority here.
"Oh, yes." The officiant smiled.
"I, Sebastian..."
So his name is Sebastian. Everything happened quickly. We exchanged the rings, we said vows, we kissed, and everything. All I know about my husband is that his name is Sebastian.
*
This ceremony is boring the hell out of me. My mom is full of tears. Oh no. She can't let me go now! It's a wonder. My brothers gave me a toast and tell my husband how rebellious I was. Ridge and Nora, my best friends are sitting far away, giving me an assurance nod that they were here whenever I look at them.
I was constantly kicking my feet on the grass. I don't know what else to do. At some point, my running shoes were revealed and the man called Sebastian looked at them. I instantly hid my shoes beneath the several layers of my gown. I don't want to give my father a chance to point out another flaw again and I don't care what this Sebastian thinks of his new bride.
Since I could no more kick my feet, I started to pluck the petals of the flowers in the bridal bouquet- Lily of the Valley, Stephanotis, Sweet William, and Astilbe. I studied the Lilly of the valley flowers- they belong to the Asparagaceae family, C. majalis species. I remember the names well even though I studied them a long time ago.
Violet slapped my hand to stop me from plucking flowers. "What kind of girl pluck beautiful flowers?" She hissed.
Why does every girl have to like flowers? I don't understand.
I looked at her date. He might be Bash. But she overdid in describing him. I see no shape of a sculpted body in that suit. He looked rather lean.
I move my eyes from her to the stage where my brothers continued telling the crowd about how I once locked myself in a storeroom and how I almost jumped from the terrace of our house. Cheers are raised in the crowd. People started to laugh. Just like that, they made the two dreadful incidents in my life a joke.
"Bash," My sister called. But she didn't address the person beside her. She addressed the person beside me.
I looked to my side and there, he sat- Bash, Sebastian. So she talked about this guy before and I asked who he was. She didn't overdo anything. Because this Sebastian is everything she described. Why am I noticing this now? Because I was trying to be numb before.
When he raised his hand to check the time, I realized that his hands are indeed calloused as Violet explained. One could easily say how rugged he was since his suit is a tight fit. Everything about him seems perfect, his subtle beard, his pulled-back hair, even though it looks messy, his hooded eyes, especially the color of lenses he used, and even his height. He is so perfect. No wonder my father worried about my looks.
Well, the handsome prince and the ugly bride!
People call him Bash. If only I knew that before, I would have convinced my sister to marry him. She is clearly attracted to him and even envious of me.
PERTIMBANGAN PENCIPTA 
CHINNYNNIHAN
CHINNYNNIHAN Dear readers,
This is my first time writing on web novel. I am writing what I feel I could read during my sad and boring times- With some enemy to lovers trope, and a little of forbidden romance. I hope you like it. One thing I have learned in my writing experience is that readers are the best teachers. I hope you like this novel. And let me know my flaws.
This novel is for all the people who got used to the life where they hide pain beneath their smiles. There is nothing like a huge or small pain. Pain is always a pain. And I want you to know that you are all fighters and wonderful human beings regardless of what the world says.
Status Power Mingguan
-- Peringkat
Power 
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