Bab 164: I Just Wish It Was Enough To Make A Difference

That wasn't true. Daisy had no idea how tempting it had been to forget his plans and stay on the farm with her forever. But Rukelion knew that the thought of what he left behind would torture him even more if he had. He had known some peace with her—more than he ever expected to have again—but then something would remind him of his loss all over again and the fury would consume him. 

"I do!" he insisted. "You have no idea how hard that is. I wouldn't even know where to start."

"But can you try? For me? I don't want to see you spiral, Rukelion. I love you too much for that. Seeing you go down the road Juliet saw for you would kill me."

Try? What was he supposed to try? He had already been trying to forget the horrors of his past as much as possible but it didn't always work. The more he thought about home, the more unstable he felt and he had been doing that a lot lately.