Bab 26: Motivating a woman with words
"I like what I like!" Antonio wouldn't budge when Beluga suggested he order a cappuccino next time as the three walked in the noisy, crowded streets of Union Square.
Ben found it admirable. 'I can respect that Antonio won't change who he is to fit in. That's how a man should b—' He cut his thought short as he slapped the straw out of Antonio's hand. "Can you not lick it?!? I don't want to vomit!"
"How am I supposed to get to the whipped cream at the top of the cap, Ben?!? That's what the straw is for!" Antonio yelled.
"That's not what it's for!" All Ben's respect vanished, buried under the pile of loathing for Antonio's mannerisms.
Beluga defused the situation. "I think Ben got the point of how to get an insta-date. In that regard, you did a good job, Antonio."
Antonio smiled with pride. He also held another straw in his mouth from god knows where, slurping the last drops of liquid at the bottom of the cup.
Ben frowned in disgust. "Tch. Forget it. I'm going to try for an insta-date." Ben looked for women in the vicinity. There was one sitting on the concrete steps listening to music, so he approached her.
Beluga and Antonio watched from a distance. The woman responded well to Ben's opener. A few minutes later, he pointed her to Starbucks and she followed him there. Beluga and Antonio were both speechless. They didn't expect Ben to succeed on his first try. This was the difference between 0 and 7 charisma. They followed Ben into the Starbucks and watched for developments.
Ben waited on line with the woman and ordered two drinks for them. When Beluga and Antonio saw this, they shook their heads. Ben sat down with the woman and tried making conversation. However, her demeanor changed; She became cold and distant. 5 minutes later, she excused herself and left. Filled with confusion, Ben went over to his friends and asked if they knew the problem.
"It's simple," Beluga answered. "You bought her a drink."
Ben squinted. "What's the big deal? It's just a coffee."
Beluga snorted. "That's what it looks like to you, in your logical brain. Do you know what it looked like to her?"
Ben was silent.
"It appeared like you were buying her a drink so she would spend time with you. It lowered your value, making you look weak. It seems ridiculous, but this is how many females in Western countries view men who buy them drinks. It's the same whether alcohol or coffee. As a general rule, buying a female a drink is a great way to turn yourself into her drink sponsor. That's a guy she doesn't respect who goes home alone at the end of the night. Don't be that guy."
Ben stared into his drink, thoughtful.
Beluga added, "This varies with cultures. In countries with higher feminism, most females view men who buy them anything as weak. She's not your wife. Why should you purchase anything for her? What's more is feminist females take pride in paying for their own things. So rather than having them complain about you being patronizing, let them pay…"
He remembered something else. "Actually, in more patriarchal countries such as the Slavic and some Latin American nations, it can be the opposite. Many females there expect men to take charge, including of the finances. So if you can't pay for a drink, you come off as a broke loser. There are other exceptions, but I'm getting off topic…"
Beluga continued. "You'll find out about all that when you travel to those countries someday. The key is, here in America, don't pay for females' drinks. In fact, some females will sh*t test you by asking you to buy them a drink. You need to defuse that by saying something like 'I don't give candy to strangers' or 'I don't buy girls drinks, but you can buy me one.' Another option is to get a drink but tell her to share it with you because you'd like to not drink too much."
Ben got the gist of it. He never heard that before. In movies and TV, it was common to see men offering to buy women drinks. A lot of on-screen romances started like that. Now, Ben understood TV wasn't the best place to get advice from. Many of the things he learned in the recent past were counter-intuitive, but verified to be correct through his experience. At least, Beluga hadn't steered him wrong so far.
Ben scanned around for a new target and approached. The next few didn't go well. Either the women were uninterested or they were too busy to grab a coffee with him, but Ben kept at it. He spotted a girl standing outside a clothing store, looking through the glass display. Ben opened her.
A few minutes later, the two of them were inside Starbucks getting coffees. This time, Ben only ordered for himself and allowed the girl to pay for her own drink. She didn't mind at all and acted like it was normal. That's when Ben understood Beluga was right. The two of them sat down and Ben received a pleasant surprise.
[Congratulations! You've unlocked the Achievement: Fool's Gold(common) - Get a woman to go on a date with you]
[Distributing reward: PUA Points + 100]
'Why couldn't I be real gold?' Ben wanted to curse but cheered up when he saw the points.
[Congratulations! You've unlocked the Achievement: Insta-Date, Insta-Regret(uncommon) - Get a woman to go on a date within 5 minutes of meeting you]
[Distributing reward: PUA Points + 200]
'There's no regret! Not yet! Tch.' The system could talk all the sh*t it wanted as long as it kept feeding him points. That put him at 750! Ben's mood improved, but when he refocused on the girl, he realized he still had a problem.
Ben was getting decent at opening and building attraction now, but what should he say on a date? The vibe felt different. When the previous girl left after only a few minutes, it wasn't only because Ben bought the coffee. Another reason was that his attempts at conversation weren't working. He kept making jokes and teasing her to build attraction, but something was off.
As the girl sipped her coffee, waiting for Ben to say something, Ben clenched his jaw. 'Forget it. Don't over-complicate things. Your charisma is 7. Use your charm and motivational speaking to win her over.' Ben put his hands on his knees in a serious posture.
The girl looked on in anticipation. Ben's body language and eye contact captivated her. It looked like he had something interesting to say and she was eager to know what it was. 'Will he ask about my hobbies? My goals for the future? My hopes and dreams?'
Ben gazed deep into her eyes. Channeling all his charisma and speaking ability, he motivated her with his words. "Have sex with me! Do it!"
…
As the girl walked out, at a nearby table, Beluga and Antonio were frozen in facepalm.
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