Bab 16: It's a Wonderful Time for Theft
Outskirts of Boston
Massachusetts, United States of America
The city of Boston was bustling with cheerful grace and happiness as time counted down to one of the most prolific and celebrated holiday in most countries. It was Christmas time and there was no one more excited than Naruto as he jumped from building to building with several flips and showboating to show his cheerful support for the holiday.
His cheery mood was interrupted when he heard the familiar music that is the pursuing squad car of the Boston PD. "Why don't criminals take the day off too?" Naruto complained before he changed direction towards the siren. It wasn't long until he caught up with the pursuing vehicle and saw the fleeing counterpart about three cars length away.
His eyes caught the sight of people crossing the intersection ahead and his speed increased with a Shunshine as Patronus reappeared in front of the speeding car and threw shuriken at the four wheels. The tires blew out, causing the vehicle to stagger a bit as the driver tried to regain control.
"Doton: Spikero."
The criminals in the car grunted in pain when the car's engine was pierced by a spear emerging from the ground. They looked up and their eyes bulged in fear when they saw a waving Patronus as the two quickly got out of their car and set themselves on the ground. "We surrender!" They cried out since the hero's reputation was frightening because no one in the criminal world knows anything about him. He was a ghost to them…the Ghost of Boston they called him.
"Aw, at least make it a little amusing." Patronus sighed as he put a pair of zip ties on the criminals.
Once the police took them into custody and a pair of farewells, Naruto disappeared into an alleyway and climbed up the building until he heard a 'beep' from his right arm. He pulled back his sleeve, revealing a device that clung to the Hidden Blade bracer on the side facing him where he saw a message for him.
"Looks like I got a message."
The device was similar like the S.H.I.E.L.D. device he wore on Yamatai Island except Sky built it herself along with some help by Horizon Labs' latest software that she 'procured' during Thanksgiving week. It held the latest technologies in the world including satellite images, the police frequency and GPS to aid him in his hero patrols.
"Looks like I'm going to the museum."
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Boston Museum of Arts & Antiquities
"So why am I here, curator?" Patronus asked the elderly man in a gray suit with a red Santa's hat.
The curator turned around as he said to the hero. "Your reputation in this city precedes you, Patronus. Criminals are hiding in their dens ever since you arrived long ago. Honestly, I feel that you are the best security measure."
"Security measure?" Patronus pouted a little since he didn't like being called a thing. "No offense, but it is Christmas holiday, curator."
"I would not ask for your help if it wasn't the utmost importance." The curator said gravely as he led the local hero to the main center where there was a painting guarded by two buff security guards in suits and guns. "This is a painting that was once forever lost to history."
Naruto looked at the painting and was amazed by the detailed image of powerful emotions and colors. The central part of the painting had four men mounted on their horses as they fought for a battle flag. "I'm not into painting or art, but I gotta admit that this…this is powerful."
"The Lost Leonardo as it is informally known but its real name is The Battle of Anghiari." The curator explained before he went into the details about the lost painting and the more Naruto listened, his interest in the painting grew as he gazed at the centuries-old painting.
Patronus nodded as he understood the apparent value of the painting which is priceless. "And because of that, you want me to make sure that the painting stays out of the hands of those who want to acquire it via illegal means."
"And you'll be thoroughly compensated for it." The curator emphasized the 'compensated' word to get his point across. "Please until the exhibit is over on Christmas Eve."
Patronus pondered about this for a good ten minutes before he decided to help the curator who was very pleased about his answer. Naruto asked to be excused to make preparations for the security and found himself on the roof where he made sure that no one was watching or listening to him. He pulled a crystal skull and pressed the soft pentagon-shaped bulge on the forehead before speaking to it. "Girls? Are you there?" He asked before after deactivating the wrist computer and his earbud.
-"Hubby!"- Naruto chuckled at Kuroka's voice as it was clear she missed him. –"When are you coming back?! I need my Hubby pillow to cuddle with!"- He heard stuff cluttered around the skull followed by a painful cry and lastly a different voice belonging to the mother of the group.
-"Patronus, continue your patrol but do make it back in time for the holidays. We all miss you."- Rhea said elegantly to her husband as Naruto chuckled at her words until a nervous sigh reached her ears. –"Something's happened, huh?"-
"What makes you say that?" Naruto gulped at being nearly figured out.
-"Naruto."-
Naruto gulped when Rhea used her commanding voice on him. He was basically powerless against her when she becomes concerned for him possibly due to her motherly personality. Thus, he had no choice but to tell her the truth about being hired by the museum's curator to protect the Lost Leonardo. When he did so, Naruto had to mute the phone because Rhea shouted with glee and ranted about her desire to see Leonardo's lost work.
"I take it you are a fan of his work." Naruto stated after Rhea calmed down and reassumed her motherly tone.
-"Of course! Such a wonderful man although it was bit of a shame when I heard of his preference."-
"Preference?"
-"Nothing you need to worry since I met you and fell in love."-
"…What's the penalty for destroying a priceless artwork?" Naruto asked seriously as his jealousy rose a bit while Rhea chuckled through the skull. He sighed after her pleadings not to destroy the painting convinced him otherwise. "I won't, I won't. Besides I'll keep a clone here for the three days and then watch the exhibition on the last day. There's no way I'm missing Christmas with you girls and the kids."
-"You're a wonderful husband. We're blessed to have you and I know the kids are happy to have you as their father."-
"I'll see you later tonight, okay? Love you." Naruto put away the crystal skull into his cloak's many seals and created a clone to take his place as he left the museum for one last round of patrol before his return home.
As the invisible Naruto jumped from building to building expertly, a cry reached his ears and he changed directions on a pivoted foot. The ninja reached the area and saw a group of shady-clothed men surrounding a woman in her mid-twenties. "Not today." He casually dropped off the roof and landed on one of the thugs.
And his friends were shocked and afraid at the same time.
"Oh crap, it's Patronus!"
"Hello, boys."
The men's would-be victim cringed every time Patronus punched, kicked or noogied their attackers as she stared at him. "He reminds me of my husband." Naruto turned to face the woman.
"Are you all…right…miss?" He was stunned by the woman's appearance once his eyes got a full look. She was shorter than him but her body had the graceful development of a peak woman with luscious red hair and green eyes that reminded him of Rhea as her clothes were covered by a soft green jacket.
"I'm fine, thanks." She gave a once-over at Patronus' attire and weaponry. "Who are you supposed to be, a ninja or something?"
"Something." Naruto answered before he activated the wrist computer and alerted Boston PD about the attempted crime. Once he got the okay about the patrol car, he cut off the connection. "Police will be here soon, miss. Hope you have yourself a nice Christmas."
"Why do you do it?"
Patronus stopped in his tracks as he looked at the conflicted woman. "Do what?"
"Being a hero. Why do you do it?" She asked again.
"Honestly?"
"I'd prefer it."
"I've always wanted to be a hero and I have skills to help people. Simple as that."
"But doesn't it conflict with your personal life? Your family? Your friends?"
Patronus thought about it for a moment. "Not really. Sure, there are moments of tension and frustration, but we always work it out." He looked at the woman. "I take it you know someone in the business. A family member or colleague?" Her silence was his answer in the reluctant positive manner. "I see."
"He just…" The red head leaned against the wall opposite from Patronus. "There were times that got to us but the last event about his heroism…I just couldn't take it anymore. I left him and moved to the West Coast for a while."
"So, you're married to him." The woman flinched and cursed herself about spilling the beans about her marriage. "Relax, I won't say anything to anyone, promise." Patronus swore with his hand over his heart. "You divorced him?"
"Seperated is more like it."
"I see."
"At first it was fine but lately I…I've begun feeling lonely and out of place." She sighed deeply. "I want to go back to him but I don't know if he'll take me back. I basically abandoned him but I don't want to go through it again. What should I do?"
Patronus crossed his arms as he pondered about this rather serious subject. He and his wives never had any problems with his hero persona since he made clones to take his place and time to spend with them but this was the first time he confronted anything marriage-related. It could mean make or break for the woman's marriage to her unknown hero husband.
"I guess it all comes to one question, miss." Naruto paused before he said, "Do you love him?"
"…Yes, I do."
"Then you have your answer." Patronus' head perked up when he heard the sirens close by. "The police are here. Take care of yourself and Merry Christmas."
As the woman watched the hero expertly climbed to the roof and disappear afterwards, she looked at the glaring siren lights as a Boston police officer approached her while his partners rounded up the downed criminals. "Are you all right, ma'am?" She nodded. "May I ask for your name for the report?"
"Parker…Mary Jane Watson-Parker."
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(Two Days Later-Christmas Eve)
Among the numerous tourists and citizens who were in awe of the Lost Leonardo, a young blonde woman stared at the legendary painting with a subtle intense gaze before they flickered around the room. They switched from the guards, the cameras, and the exits connected to several hallways. She was casing the room and the entire museum for the matter of fact as the gift on her Christmas list was hanging in front of her.
Besides the Lost Michelangelo counterpart, she and her father had always wanted to find the Lost Leonardo and now it was right in front of her. But it would be poorly amateur of her if she were to take it without the utmost care and strict planning, not to mention about the possible competition for the painting.
"It's a thing of wonder." Felicia remained composed at the person who walked and stood next to her. She found a young man with blonde hair like hers, blue eyes that resembled the deep blue ocean, and happy aura around him that she felt. "Though I don't really understand why."
"Are you an art enthusiast? Or student?"
The man shook his head casually. "I never really got into art but this painting here-" His finger pointed at the lost painting. "I don't know but something about it intrigues me."
"Art does that to people even when they're not interested originally." Felicia blinked softly. "What's going on here?" She had never entered a conversation with anyone of the male gender unless she was planning a theft and needed to seduce the owner as part of her plan. The very few men she talked without ulterior motives was Spider-Man and that hooded hero from Boston, Patronus. "If you had a chance to obtain this painting, would you do it?"
Naruto assumed a thinking expression and thought about it for a good two minutes. "Yeah, yeah, I would. I'd be lying if I said it wouldn't look great on my bedroom wall." He made a mental image of the painting in his master bedroom above the bed. "Pleasure to meet you, though, the name's Naruto." He offered a hand to Felicia.
The cat-themed thief hesitated before her hand met with his and that was when she felt it: a warm jolt spread from his hand to her shoulder. As the disguised ninja, he was baffled by the pure beauty his fellow blonde since he did not expect to meet someone like her during his discreet scouting inside the museum.
Felicia shook his hand with hers a couple times before she released it. "Felicia…Well it was nice talking with you, but I must be moving along."
"No prob. See you later." Naruto turned away and left behind a bewildered Felicia. It was not long until he felt a hand on his shoulder that caused him to turn around and saw Felicia. "Is something wrong?"
"Is that it?"
"What 'it?'"
"You're not going to ask for my number or a date?"
"No."
"Why not?" Felicia asked a little hasty.
"Because you're uncomfortable about it."
"No, I wasn't."
"Yes, you were."
"No."
"Yes."
"No."
"Yes."
Their little verbal debate caught an audience but it was broken when a loud thunder noise rang through the halls and the room shook in place. Naruto helped Felicia to her feet and ran with her in the panicking crowd for the nearest exit until he conveniently tripped on the floor. Felicia looked back to search for him but found no sign and had little choice to delay her heist until the heat dies down…or she could use this to her advantage.
"Ah~ Look at this painting." The masked man stared at the Lost Leonardo with great respect while his twenty men guarded the entrances around the display room and took other prominent paintings and statues from their pedestals, shoving them into the vans that protruded in the main room. "Years…years I have searched for this painting and now I have it close in my grasp."
"That's the last of them, boss, and we're ready to go."
"Ah yes, very good, Dominus." The boss blinked as he did not recognize the voice behind him. It sounded guttural at best. "Dominus, are you okay?"
"Sure Caesar."
"Ah okay." Caesar lifted his arms to grab the painting, but he had reached for his gun instead and pointed it after turning around. However, his gun-wielding arm stopped midway by a different hand before Caesar felt an impossibly jolt of pain in his torso and darkness covered his eyes.
"Man, I'm too strong." Patronus complained as he looked at The Battle of Anghiari before he dragged the unconscious Caesar to the tied-up men near the vans. It was not long for him to pick up the sound of sirens, then the squad cars of the Boston PD. "Over here, gentlemen." He directed some officers to the citizens while a different squad stayed with the criminals and the last few officers followed Patronus back to the display room.
"The room is secured I take it." Sergeant Wilson stated rather than ask as Patronus nodded and turned around to face him. "Honestly, you're making us look bad out there." He joked while Naruto chuckled with the fifteen-year veteran until his eyes noticed something wrong and it was behind the hero. "Um, Patronus?"
"Yeah?"
"Where's the painting?"
"What are you talking about, serge? It's there." Naruto pointed over the shoulder with his thumb. Wilson gestured him to turn around and so the ninja did, but his cheery mood changed to an indignant one. "Oh crap."
The painting was gone followed by a fainting curator who had arrived moments earlier to check on it.
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(Five Minutes Later)
"That was so easy!"
A cheery Black Cat jumped from rooftop to rooftop with the Lost Leonardo on her back. Her father taught her all she knew about thievery, but compromise was the main aspect and that included her brazen approach just now. And to think that she had accomplished this right under Patronus's nose.
"Now to make it to the safe house and I'll be in the clear."
"Really now? And what are you going to do after?"
"Take a bath then stare at the painting with a glass of wine and…" Black Cat turned her head to the right where she saw an airborne Patronus in the Burt Reynolds position to tease her. "How?!" She had a good five minutes head start against the hero and yet he was right there with her!
"Shouldn't you be wondering about your back?"
"My back? No…" She reached out for the painting but could not reach its frame on her back. Her eyes looked at Patronus who landed on the roof with her and saw the Lost Leonardo in his hand. "You annoy me, you know that?"
"I'm hurt!" Patronus answered in mock-hurt before he jumped back to dodge a thrust strike from Black Cat. "Haha~ You can't touch me~" He taunted as he landed on a pile of boxes until it broke suddenly under his weight. "Wha!"
Black Cat chuckled as she casually caught the painting in her hands. "I didn't have to~" She ran towards the edge of the roof until her feet tripped over something, causing Felicia to let go of the painting. The cat-themed thief looked up and saw a thin wire around her right foot before following the end of it wrapped around Naruto's left hand as he caught the painting with his free hand.
"Yeah, what was that? It was like something messed with the area." Naruto felt a very subtle 'pull' in the area and it was so subtle that he almost did not sense it at all. It was really weird, but then again, he currently lives in a dimension filled with people possessing strange powers that could be considered Kekkai Genkai in his native lands.
"It sounds like you have a bit of bad luck, Patronus." Black Cat teased before she swiped the wire with her claws, freeing herself as she pounced at the hooded hero who had sealed away the painting for safe-keeping inside his robe as he flipped away for safety.
Patronus merely hummed in thought as he landed safely this time before dodging Black Cat's strikes and kicks. He caught her knee and opposite left fist as Black Cat was about to follow up with a head-butt until a 'boom' sound drew their attention away from their fight. "Looks like we're to continue some other time, Black Cat." He slipped away from Black Cat's limbs and threw a smoke-bomb between them.
Black Cat coughed behind her left hand while her opposite limb waved the smoke away from her. When it finally cleared, she looked around for the hooded hero but he was gone from her sight. Luckily for her, heroes are very predictable and she knows Patronus's next location.
"I'm not losing this to anyone."
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Crash Site
Boston, Massachusetts
Sneaking into the building through the hole from the roof was easy enough, but this time Naruto did not expect anything like this at all. A person laid facedown and appeared to be wearing a brown jacket as crushed steel beams and boxes was beneath.
"*Whistle* How high did you fall?" He asked the unconscious person while staring at the snowy night through the hole.
No answer came from the person as Naruto expected for someone who crash landed through a building.
"The box." The person said weakly with a cough. "Take it."
Patronus looked around and found a red/black bow with a ribbon like a Christmas present. "This box? What's so special about this box?"
"Let me see it." Black Cat insisted as she pounced on Patronus and landed on him this time.
Both hero and anti-hero rolled around on the floor as the box exchanged hands several times until Felicia emerged as victor. She stood up as Naruto was on his knees, looking at the box. "What's in here?"
"Don't open it!" The person cried out but it was too late as Black Cat opened it.
Patronus watched the inside of the box glow a bright green light that shined against Black Cat's face. It was that moment he noticed her eyes dilated and an uncharacteristic gleeful smile etched her lips. "Um, Kuroneko, are you okay?" He asked while approaching the female and reaching for the box.
"Rawr!"
Patronus twirled his body out of Black Cat's sudden claw strike as he quickly back-stepped away from her ferocious barrage. "Cat, knock it off!" He looked at the box and quickly kicked it out of her hands, which worked since her barrage ceased moments afterwards.
"Wh-Wha?" Felicia shook her head as she rubbed her temple. "What happened?"
"You went feral." Naruto answered as he held the closed box away from her. "By this box." He turned around to face the person who was knowledgeable about the object. "You got some explaining to do."
The person finally turned over and both costumed being gasped when they saw him. He had white skin with a full white beard and moustache while his hair was tied in a ponytail as he wore a brown jacket over red shirts and light green pants. "Oh no, not you two." He complained after seeing them.
"Who are you?" Patronus asked.
"I'm Santa."
"What? Santa Claus?" Black Cat asked incredulously.
Santa threw his arms up. "No, Santa McMurphy! Yes, Santa Claus!" He argued before wincing in pain.
"No way. You can't be Santa Claus."
"He's got rosy cheeks." Black Cat remarked before she realized what she just said.
"Yeah, your cheeks are bruise-colored," Patronus said disappointedly.
Black Cat had an uncomfortable look after a whiff of the air. "And you smell like you stepped in something."
"Well, sorry to disappoint you." Santa countered gruffly. "But I was just shot at, fell 3500 feet and crashed through a building." He grunted in pain as his hand clutched his stomach where bullet holes were present. "Besides all those other stuff was made up by advertising companies. Trust me, I'm the real Santa Claus!"
Both Patronus and Black Cat shared incredulous looks before the latter asked, "Prove it."
"*Groan* All right." Santa used his elbows to lift himself up slightly. "You're both Patronus and Black Cat and I won't say anything about your identities." The surprised people looked at him as he continued. "For you, Cat, when you were a little girl, all you wanted was your father to be home for Christmas and read your favorite bedtime story 'The Cat in the Hat'." Felicia was shocked by the detailed knowledge while Santa shifted his gaze to Naruto. "For you…why is ramen the only thing that matters to you? Very unhealthy food you know."
It took all of the Jinchuriki's self-control not to pummel the downed apparently-real Christmas figure. "So, you really are Santa." He said with awe. "What happened to you and what's inside the box?" Naruto lifted the box for the three of them to look upon it.
"Actually, it's not what's in inside the box but the box itself that matters." Santa took out a gem from his pocket before an ethereal mirror of sorts formed in front of them as it revealed a grand village bustling with life. "You see it all started a few months ago."
The mirror's image shifted like water until it focused on small people adorned in green outfits and hats with long ears: elves. Naruto and Felicia watched the mirror focus on a cleaner Santa in a red shirt and brown pants being approached by a tall elf. "I was approached by my lead toy designer, Quillgin, who was excited about a breakthrough he made on his life's work." The past Santa looked at the formula given to him by Quillgin. "The idea was simple: an empty box that, when open, would give the child they desire most. But little did I know the key component was dark magic."
"I have a feeling you discovered it the hard way." Patronus and Black Cat continued to watch after the mirror changed images to past Santa and Quillgin observing a family behind a mirror.
Santa nodded. "We used a focus group to test out how it would work in a Christmas morning scenario." Both hero and thief winced when they saw what happened: the family of four began fighting each other over the glowing box. "Things got ugly: the box had a power over people. It brought out the worse in them. I ordered the box to be locked away and any work pertaining to it be destroyed."
The mirror changed once again to show the bow being locked in the vault followed by past Quillgin's laboratory being destroyed in flames with past Santa presiding from outside. The past Quillgin tried to stop the destruction but past Santa had pushed him away, forcing the angry elf to leave in humiliation.
"But I should've known that he'd come back for it then." Santa put away the gem and pointed at the two youngsters. "The box is your hands now. You must destroy it. If Quillgin gets his hands on it, he'll use its power to get what he wants most: the destruction of Christmas forever!"
"Christmas gone forever?!" Patronus asked before he looked at Black Cat then at Santa. "Don't worry, Santa. Black Cat and I will do this."
Black Cat leaned away from the ninja as if he offended her. "Excuse me? Who do you think you are? I'm not doing this for free."
"But it's Christmas, Kuroneko." Patronus whined a bit. "Feel the spirit especially with Santa here!" He pointed at the groaning Santa.
"Forgot it then."
"Come on, Cat!"
Santa groaned despondently. "Why'd I have to land in this city? Okay, Black Cat, I'll give you one gift from my private collection."
"Private collection?" Black Cat repeated with glee.
Patronus shook his head. "For shame, woman, for shame." After putting the box down, he and Black Cat walked to Santa and tried to help him up but he cried in pain, forcing them to stop their attempt.
"Forget about me. Just go and destroy the box. It's the most important thing to do right now." Santa felt their hands leave his person. "Quillgin won't stop until…he…gets it…" He closed his eyes and fell asleep.
"Santa?" Patronus asked concernedly.
Black Cat sighed, "He passed out." She looked at the box and found an axe nearby before grabbing it. "Let's destroy it here and now!"
"Wait!" Patronus warned too late.
Black Cat swung the axe directly on the box, only to be forced back by the powerful defense. Patronus Shunshined in the trajectory and caught her before she could crash against the wall. "You okay?"
"Yeah…better than that axe though." Felicia answered with her finger pointed at the broken halves.
Patronus nodded as he placed Black Cat back on her feet. "Yeah, better you than that." He then picked up the box when his senses detected the malevolent dark energy around the gift. "Any idea how to destroy this thing?"
"You're asking me?" Black Cat asked sarcastically.
"Yeah, since we're working together on this." Patronus answered simply before he walked to the unconscious Santa and grabbed his jacket, shaking him like a doll to wake him up. "Santa, tell us how to destroy this thing!"
A snort was his only response as sweat-drops slid down the two associates' heads.
"Well, he's got the jolly part down." Black Cat spoke off-handedly. An idea then popped into her head. "I have something that destroy the box."
"Shoot."
"We destroy it in a vault of hot molten lava."
"Really?"
"Sure. I heard it was one of the ways to destroy evil artifacts."
Patronus tilted his head as he was unsure about this. "Are you sure about this?" He soon assumed a thinking pose. "Come to think of it, why does this sound familiar to me? Have I read it somewhere?" He tapped his head as if to jumpstart his thinking process but Felicia stopped him later.
"Do you want to destroy this thing or not?" Black Cat hurriedly insisted, hoping that her hooded associate did not notice her slight blushed cheeks. "So, where are we going to find a volcano around here?"
"I know where but it's kind of far from here."
"How far?"
"Have you ever been to a Shinto temple?"
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Fushimi Inari Taishi
Inariyama, Fushimi, Kyoto
Honshu, Japan
The fox god Inari hummed contently as his numerous adoptive messengers played with each other like the children they are. The Christmas spirit was highly celebrated by his Parthenon and the Yokai all around especially since the indigenous population offered thanks and gifts to the spirits for the year and hopefully the new year as well.
The peaceful atmosphere he and his kitsune messengers enjoyed was interrupted by a flaming blue circle in the middle of the temple. Inari hummed as he recognized the flames. "So, he figured out the sword's teleportation capabilities. At least he's coming by to greet us for the holiday. And he's brought a guest this time."
"What was that?!"
"Hey, keep your voice down! We're in a temple so show respect." Patronus chastised as he sheathed Kogitsune before bowing to Inari. "Merry Christmas, Lord Inari Okami."
"Merry Christmas to you too, Patronus." Inari looked at the woman next to him. "And may I ask for your stunning colleague's name?"
Black Cat was taken aback by the elderly man's question but had to admit him to be daring. "Black Cat."
"Ah, the thief. I recall someone of that name tried to steal the regalia from Amaterasu's temple in Tokyo a couple years back." A gaping Patronus looked at a sheepish Black Cat who found the ground to be very interesting as Inari chuckled knowingly. "You have guts, my dear, but sadly for you, they were not there."
"Say what?" Both visitors asked in unison.
Inari pretended he did not hear their words and asked, "So, what can I do for you two?"
"Can we borrow your volcano?"
"Say what now?" Inari asked as it was his turn. Naruto explained what happened with Santa Claus and the rogue elf Quillgin and the evil box in their possession until their arrival to his temple. "I see, but as much as I want to destroy the box myself, I cannot."
"Why not?"
"Because it's Christmas." Patronus face-faulted while Black Cat had a disbelief expression. "Even us deities take the holidays off from our duties."
Naruto recovered himself. "Seriously?"
"I'm afraid so, but that doesn't mean I won't allow you to use my mountain." Inari created a door that led to the cliffs on his namesake mountain. "Good luck and I hope you enjoy your holiday weekend as well."
Patronus bowed in gratitude. "Thank you, Inari Okami." Black Cat gave a silent 'thanks' before following her associate through the portal.
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Above Japan's Skies
Quillgin smirked as his tracking device beeped, telling him the exact location of his life's work. He pulled the reins to direct the reindeer to a new course towards his gift. Soon, Christmas will be destroyed and Santa Claus along with it. As for the people who were foolish enough to help Santa, he has a couple of surprises waiting for them in the bag behind him.
"Hey! Get me out of here, elf dork! I wanna eat chimichangas!"
Although he might regret his choice of the mercenary but the latter is the best at what he does and that is chaos.
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Inariyama's Summit
Naruto hoisted himself over the cliff edge before he turned around and pulled Black Cat up as she visibly shivered under her borrowed coat that he had on him. "You okay?"
"I'm f-f-fine." Felicia shivered as she followed him to the peak.
"Your body language says otherwise."
"Shut up."
"Meow." Patronus mocked her theme until he stopped in place. "We got company."
Black Cat tensed up in preparation. "Where?"
"Up."
The fast flying object flew over them as a bag was thrown off and landed in front of the two associates. The red bag moved around within as Patronus stepped in front of Black Cat to protect her from whatever threat in front of them. "All right, where is that freaking elf lord?! He interrupted my chimichanga time!"
"Oh no…" Black Cat muttered in horror. "Not him."
Patronus looked at her. "You know whose voice that is?"
"Yup. He's notorious in all communities throughout the world and a mouth that never stops talking."
"That sounds annoying."
"You have no idea." She recalled being teamed up with him and Spider-Man some time ago and by the end of it, she wanted to blow off her ears.
The bag opened and revealed a man who stood at equal height with Naruto as he wore a red and black bodysuit with white eyes along with two swords on his back that formed an 'X'. "You, are you affiliated with that long eared bastard?!"
"Uh…"
"Too late!"
"Crap!" Naruto dropped the box before he crossed his arms to block the costumed man's flying kick. "Cat, get the box and destroy it! I'll keep him busy."
A crazy face etched the masked man's head as he drew his swords against Patronus. "Keep me busy?! What are you, gay?!"
"Huh?!" Patronus countered with Kogitsune. Imagine his surprise when the red man's blades did not break against his own. "Are they made of a special metal?"
"Hell yeah, they are!"
"That was easy." A surprised Naruto blinked before noticing Black Cat leaving for the peak with the box in her possession. "Mind telling what they are?"
"I could tell you but I'll have to kill you~"
"This guy sounds like he belongs in a psych ward."
The opposing swordsman backed off and looked to be offended. "You were just thinking that I belong in the psych ward."
"How did you know?!" Patronus asked all shocked.
"Because I am the Merc with a Mouth: Deadpool!"
"…Who?"
Now it was Deadpool's turn to face-fault on the ground...then collected himself a second later. "Looks like I'll have to teach you who I am~"
"Ah shit."
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(Five Minutes Later)
"Shit!" Black Cat jumped over a massive snowball that threatened to roll over her. "This is so not worth it!"
Why? It may have something to do with the massive snow-like beasts that stood in her way, throwing massive snowballs down at her. She dodged, rolled, pounced, and twisted all over the place to avoid the white projectiles until she found temporary solace behind a boulder that served as a shield.
"This is really not worth it!" Felicia noticed the trees nearby and jumped expertly on the branches just as the snow beasts closed into her previous location. "Okay, just have to be quiet and wait for them to pass by."
"WHEEE~"
Her plan was shattered when something or someone landed into a heap of snow nearby, drawing both Black Cat and the snow creatures' attention. It was good timing too as Patronus sent the creatures with two elbow strikes and a backhand away. "Abominable snowmen?" He asked with awe as blue flames flickered around Kogitsune's blade.
"You're in awe over those things?! They just tried to run me over with massive snowballs!" Black Cat head-slapped Patronus on the head, which elicited a yelp of pain.
Naruto looked at her in disbelief. "That's how you say thanks to someone who saved your life?!"
"Yes!"
"Hoodman and Cat sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G~" Deadpool sang as he sat on a nearby tree after digging himself out of the snow, receiving glares from the two. "First comes love then marriage then divorce after Cat's cheating~"
"We're not married!" The two shouted in defiance.
"Then I can kill you two with no problem~" Deadpool hooked his legs around the branch and used his momentum to shoot himself towards to the two.
Patronus stood in front of Deadpool and waited for the moment to use one of the techniques he learned from the Sage of Six Paths. As for Deadpool, he had his swords out and spun around like a missile. Naruto focused on the ground and channeled his chakra to aid them. "Doton: Doeiken!"
The Deadpool missile groaned against the earth-composed monument. "Hey no fair!"
"All's fair in battle." Patronus countered before he blocked Deadpool's sword after the latter jumped over the earth wall.
The red mercenary lashed out with his secondary blade but that was countered with the ninja's Pivot Blade. The swordsmen entered a barrage of clashing blades and this gave Black Cat time to move around them as she raced to the peak where the heat of the molten lava could be felt during her approach.
*Bang*
Black Cat rolled out of the way as she barely sensed the attack and saw the elf from the mirror earlier, Quillgin. "I thought you'd be a small elf."
"Hand me the box and I'll spare your lives."
"Tempting but I happen to like Christmas." Black Cat responded as she played with the box between her hands. "Plus, it won't do me any good if I fail and don't get anything from Santa's private collection."
"Very well then. I'll just have 'Santa' give you your gift now." Quillgin snapped his fingers and a snowy portal appeared behind him. "In fact, here he is!"
Black Cat took a couple steps back as she was taken aback by the new arrival. It looked like Santa but it was not really him since she saw the real thing. He was taller than herself, Patronus, Deadpool and Quillgin combined with pale blue face, long arms, and yellow white hair. Red strabismic eyes stared at her even though they did not look it at all and the spiky moustache and beard also negated the jolly image as she was disturbed by the giant battle axe in its hands.
"Nicolas The Renegade…my personal slave version of jolly Santa," Quillgin said with disgust before he pointed his finger at his enemy. "Dissect her."
Felicia ducked under the axe swing but immediately pounced at Krampus' leg and swung around to deliver a roundhouse kick. It had no effect whatsoever, forcing her to backflip several times to avoid consecutive swings. She gasped when something grabbed her and soon came face-to-face with one of the snow bunny-like creatures whose maw opened, revealing its rows of sharp teeth.
"Now that's not nice."
Felicia saw the arm that held her being cut in half by Patronus's flaming sword before he sent the creature flying with a weird glowing blue sphere away. She was caught on his shoulder, much to her embarrassment. "T-Thanks…"
"You're welco-" Patronus was cut off when Renegade swung his axe and forced him to block the strike. "Hey, I was giving thanks to my friend here."
Quillgin smirked smugly as Renegade lifted his axe for another strike once more. "Renegade is made of the same dark magic I used for the box so your efforts are useless!"
He was proven wrong when his creation was bisected in half by Kogitsune as Renegade dissipated into nothingness by the flames. Patronus was about to go for the leader when he saw something at the corner of his eye. It was the box. He looked back and saw a cleaved Deadpool wrestling with Black Cat while his legs stood against a tree like it was enjoying the sight.
"All I ever wanted was to make Santa proud and relieve him of his burden with my life's work." Patronus looked at Quillgin who had opened the box, basking in its glow. "But now I will wish the destruction of Christmas forever!" He imagined explosives being put all over Christmas-related objects, trees and presents as the elf smirked at the detonator within the box.
Naruto imagined the sadness his children will have when their presents are gone and the tree and cookies. This was to be their first Christmas and he would be damn if this elf destroyed it!
"NOO!" Sheathing the sword, Patronus Shunshined in front of Quillgin and tackled over the top, falling to the lava.
"Patronus!" Black Cat shouted in concern before she kicked Deadpool away from her and jumped over the edge as well.
Patronus and Quillgin wrestled over the box in the freefall as the former landed a punch but the latter countered with a kick to the face, which made the ninja dizzy a little. Quillgin dived deeper and reached for the instrument of his revenge but Felicia also grabbed it as well. The detonator inside the box switched to diamonds, then the detonator and diamonds as a cycle. Black Cat managed to snatch it out of the elf's hands but he managed to grabbed her feet.
"Get off!"
"Cat, let go!" Patronus told her and she complied, dropping the box by pushing it further to the ground. Black Cat looked up and saw Patronus before she grabbed onto him. "Take a deep breath!" Once she did, the duo vanished in a golden flash but not before seeing Quillgin and his creation meet their end in the molten lava.
Meanwhile at the top, a regenerated Deadpool looked over and shouted, "Where's my chimichangas?!"
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Boston
Massachusetts, United States of America
A golden flash glowed the area briefly followed by the sounds of vomiting, courtesy of the Hirashin no Jutsu. "Sorry about that, but you'll get used to it."
"I don't want to get used to it." Black Cat foully corrected the hooded hero as he had his arms up defensively. "But nifty trick you have there…I'm kind of jealous."
Patronus waved his finger as if to admonish her. "You shouldn't steal, Black Cat, but that's your nature I suppose."
"Thank you!" Black Cat shouted as she was happy that someone agreed with her.
"That is what I should be saying to the two of you." Both associates looked to their sides and saw a conscious Santa Claus waving at them with his reindeer-pulled sleigh behind him. "You saved Christmas and I thank you for your efforts."
Patronus and Black Cat approached the legendary Christmas figure. "It was no problem, Santa, and we did this in record time too!" He pointed at the clock on his wrist device. "Good thing it only took three hours and not the whole day otherwise the girls would have killed me in my sleep if they tried!"
"Anyway…" Felicia drawled out as she stretched out her open palm. "My reward please."
Much to a flabbergasted Naruto's surprise, Santa nodded at this. "I made a promise and I shall keep it." He reached for something in the bag and pulled out a painting that elicited a gasp from the cat-themed thief. "I see you are familiar with it."
"But it has said to been lost right after Michelangelo finished it." Black Cat said finally as she gently held the painting in front of her. "It's amazing."
Patronus raised his hand like a child in preschool. "I'm a little lost here, but is that a lost painting?"
"Yes." Felicia answered gently as she began to caress the frame. "The Battle of Cascina was to be the sister painting to Da Vinci's Battle of Anghiari during the Renaissance but both paintings were lost to time." She visibly pouted at Naruto. "If only you had let me keep the painting, I would be set for life with these paintings."
"You're lucky to get one at all." Naruto countered in monotone.
Santa perked up at the ninja's words. "And speaking of paintings, shouldn't you return that painting back to the museum?" Both youngsters looked at him confusingly, which signaled that it was time to go. "Well, I must be going to deliver gifts and all that." He perked up after realizing that he was forgetting something. "What was it again…Ah, here it is."
"What?" Patronus caught the signature red bag that belonged to Santa. "Is this for…" Santa nodded as he boarded his sleigh and pulled the reins before taking off to the skies. "Thanks Santa!"
"HOHOHOHOH~ MERRY CHRISTMAS~"
Naruto and Felicia watched the legendary figure disappeared in a snowflake flash. "He actually said it!" The ninja shouted like a child, much to the thief's amusement.
Black Cat then noticed something hanging above them and although she wondered where it came from-a certain red-colored Christmas figure comes to mind—Felicia might as well take the opportunity since no one was around.
Patronus felt something soft touch his cheek although it was minimized by his hood's cloth. He looked to his left and saw a somewhat blushing Black Cat. "Merry Christmas." She said before running from him and disappearing over the ledge
"…Merry Christmas." A stunned Patronus answered before he ran back to the museum to return the painting then home with his family.
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Uzumaki Manor, Homestead Grounds
Forested Massachusetts, United States of America
"I'm home!" Naruto shouted with jolly as he carried the bag over his shoulders in his Santa costume he purchased for the twins a week earlier.
"Hubby!" Kuroka pounced and grabbed onto him as she smothered him with kisses. "Merry Christmas!"
"Merry Christmas, my neko."
It was not long until Rhea, Medusa, Saeko, and the twins arrived to give him hugs and kisses for the holiday. Naruto looked around and felt festive by the decorations of snowmen, candy canes, laurel wreaths and strips, and lastly the Christmas tree adorned with multicolored lights and the angel at the tip. Underneath the tree was an empty space for 'Santa' to drop off the presents for the children but that might come later than expected.
"Naruto, where did you get that bag…and painting?" Rhea asked after seeing the painting within the bag.
"It's a long story, Rhea…one I plan to tell you during the night." Naruto gave her a once-over. "Mrs. Claus." Rhea sneaked a kiss from him before Medusa, Kuroka and Saeko did the same as well since they were all dressed as Mrs. Clauses.
Ashla and Misakia cooed for their father to hold them, which he complied, and gave them kisses. "D-D-"
Time seemed to slow down for the Uzumaki Clan as they stared at the twins. "Honey, did you hear something?" Saeko asked for clarification as she and her fellow housewives stared at the twins.
"Misaki, did you say something?" Naruto asked.
It was Ashla this time who struggled with words. "D-D-D-D"
"Yeah?" Naruto asked excitedly.
"DADA~" The twins said at the same time. "MAMA~"
The parents including the stepmoms cheered happily as they huddled over the smiling twins and felt grateful to be together for the Christmas holiday with Naruto wishing for more days like this to come in future days.
Status Power Mingguan
-- Peringkat
Power 
-- Power
stone