Kais: "Ghosts?"
Sona: "Who are those ghosts?"
Dragon: "The representatives of the Ghost Nation. The two most powerful weapons they have are here on the island now."
Sona: "Why?"
Dragon: "Because they don't want all of you to join their opposing side."
No response comes back. The two look at each other in silence.
Dragon: "Now all the players are finally here."
Sona: "For what?"
She asks with a suspicious gaze.
Dragon: "For what Ozyllus wanted to happen."
Sona: "And … what did he want to happen?"
Dragon: "Well,"
He looks at us with a resolved glare as he says,
Dragon: "It won't matter."
The resolve in his eyes is sickening me,
Dragon: "Because it won't happen."
I can't look at that firm determination in his eyes.
Dragon: "I am no longer afraid of him."
Stop … it!
Dragon: "I will no longer do as he wants me to."
Please, stop talking! Stop looking like you are ready to die. Stop looking like you are ready to never give up.
Dragon: "That 'god' would now know what pain of losing something is."
Fish: "So, you are planning to betray him after all."
Dragon: "Yeah, as should you."
Fish: "Never, I don't care if he was really evil or if my whole purpose was something other than what I knew; all I know is that he is the one who made it possible for me to converse like this. I will repay his favor."
Dragon's resolve doesn't waver as he hears this. He is ready to do whatever it takes to ruin Ozyllus' plans.
Dragon: "I see. Be that as it may, I know what I have to do. Since I am to die anyway, I will at least make it so that bastard doesn't succeed."
Sona: "Could you try to be less vague about all this?"
Dragon: "Don't worry,"
He says as his gaze shifts back and forth from the two of us for a moment and then he closes his eyes,
Dragon: "By the time I die, I'd make sure you all know the truth that the whole world has been kept in dark about."
As he gives his proclamation, something inside my head hurts. There's nothing but pain in my head as of now. The doors that I had closed long ago are being torn apart and all I can feel is the pain of the memories beyond those doors flowing in.
Sona: "Are you … okay?"
I look at her and see a worried expression on her face. I can sense the fish's eyes are fixed on me too, but the same is not true for the dragon. He looks like something like this is an expected occurrence for him.
Dragon: "Those barriers that were stopping you from remembering were put in place probably for your own good. But, time is up."
It feels like a sharp needle is poking into my brain. The only difference is that the magnitude of pain is far superior to what that would be like. And the more the dragon says, the sharper the pain gets.
Dragon: "I know it must be painful. But, at the end of the day, you will never be able to get out of this mess if you don't endure that pain."
I don't know my posture right now. Am I standing? Am I on my knees? Am I holding my head in my hands? Am I shouting in pain? I don't know. I don't even care. Because right now, the only thing I can think about is –
Kais: "He saved my life, didn't he?"
Sona: "Huh?"
Dragon: "Huh?"
Fish: "Huh?"
I can't think of anything else but how wrong this sounds, and the fact that it's not wrong.
Kais: "The demon Abyss – saved my life."
And I didn't even realize his existence for so long.
*******************************
Abyss: "The dragon seems like he isn't even afraid of you anymore."
Ozyllus: "That so?"
What Ozyllus said a while ago is bugging Abyss. He doesn't know what this man meant by those words but they can't be anything good.
When you stare into the Abyss, the Abyss stares back into you. It looks like someone is going to find the meaning of those words.
Abyss has been paying attention to every person he can sense there but nothing alarming seems to be happening.
Kais: "Ghosts?"
Sona: "Who are those ghosts?"
Abyss hears Kais and Sona questioning the dragon. The dragon proceeds to explain that they belong to the Ghost Nation.
Ozyllus: "That bringing back any memories?"
Ozyllus asks in a mocking tone. Abyss doesn't respond but it does remind him of the past – the time when he was the ruler of the Ghost Nation.
Ozyllus: "What's wrong? Don't tell me you forgot what the Ghost Nation is?"
Abyss: "Of course not. The Ghost Nation was my domain. What idiot would forget about their domain?"
Ozyllus: "Oh, isn't that true?"
Unable to understand what Ozyllus want to say,
Abyss: "Are you implying something?"
He asks him. However,
Ozyllus: "If it was just a domain you ruled, you could have forgotten about it after 1000 years. After all, it's not like that was the only place you ever ruled. But; it was the domain that you ruled and destroyed, now that truly is something you would never be able to forget."
Abyss: "I destroyed the Ghost Nation? How?"
Ozyllus: "Well, if you had never become their ruler, they would never have had the guts to deny my request to join my army. It's only because of you that they denied that offer, and hence ended up losing the war."
A look of disdain comes on Abyss' face but he keeps his calm. The dark, mellow face of the demon slowly turns back to being composed as he says,
Abyss: "You haven't changed one bit in the past 1000 years."
Ozyllus: "Oh, did you want me to change?"
Abyss: "No, of course not. If you had changed, became a better person somehow, I would not feel right hating you."
Ozyllus: "You are troubled by my existence but you don't want me to change. You want me to remain someone you can hate rather than someone you may be able to forgive, just because of your selfishness."
He laughs as he continues,
Ozyllus: "That's a demon for you."
Dragon: "Now all the players are finally here."
Sona: "For what?"
The voices from the outside again grab their attention.
Dragon: "For what Ozyllus wanted to happen."
Ozyllus: "That bastard is trying to be clever, huh?"
Abyss understands what Ozyllus means by that. The dragon is sealed by a contract in which he has to obey Ozyllus. And one of the orders Ozyllus gave him that he has to obey is that he can't tell anyone about his real intentions. That said, because of the contract not covering every little aspect of his conversation, he does have room to give hints or vague answers, which is exactly what he is doing right now.
Ozyllus: "That's amusing."
They hear Sona asking about Ozyllus' intentions and the dragon denying her the answer. It is as expected because this is something his contract forbids him to answer.
Ozyllus: "How far can he get like that though?"
Abyss: "…"
Ozyllus: "I'll tell you – nowhere. All his attempts will only end in failure. He will never be able to accomplish what he is trying to accomplish and will die with only regrets."
As Abyss listened to him, he realized that his words may not be false. But, he also could sense the resolve coming from the dragon that Kais was reading through his Aura Reading.
By using Aura Reading during that time, Kais has unknowingly allowed Abyss to sense other's auras too. This is why he could pay attention to them. While Ozyllus couldn't do so as he was not used to doing something like that, Abyss had been living in that body for years now. He was completely capable of gaining and returning help to Kais.
And so, he could also feel the one thing that made Ozyllus so sure he would win.
Ozyllus: "Tell me, how much is Kais suffering right now seeing that resolve of the dragon?"
Abyss: "… very"
He is suffering a lot.
Ozyllus: "Isn't that right?"
Ozyllus laughs. He knows why Kais would suffer after seeing something like that.
Ozyllus: "Somewhere deep in his mind, he also knows how the dragon has no chances of succeeding. It is sickening him to see that dragon strengthen his resolve even though he would gain nothing in the end. Isn't that how it is?"
He asks knowing that the answer can only be 'yes'. Abyss also knows this. Abyss knows that this is something Kais would really not want to see right now. As much as the demon appreciates the resolve shown by the dragon, it just might be the worst time or place to show it.
Abyss: "Still, that's how it is now, isn't it?"
Ozyllus: "Huh?"
Abyss: "You are laughing because of how things are right now. But, what if things change?"
Ozyllus looks at Abyss with narrowed eyes as he says,
Ozyllus: "And how exactly, would it change?"
Abyss: "Do you think I had not been preparing for this kind of situation during the last 12 years I have been in this body?"
Ozyllus grows cautious as he sees Abyss spread his arms and smile.
Abyss: "Breakout!"
As the demon shouts, rays of light penetrate the darkness of The Cage. Ozyllus stares at this change with a mouth gaping wide and horrified eyes.
Dragon: "That 'god' would now know what pain of losing something is."
It's almost as if his lines were meant for this situation as they ring in Ozyllus' ears.
Ozyllus: "No … way!"
For the first time in the entire conversation, Abyss laughs like the devil would and,
Abyss: "You can't even begin to imagine how happy I am to see that expression on your face."
The rays of light piercing the dark are the fragments of memories that are coming back to Kais. At that moment, he is remembering things that are bound to cause him even more pain. But this pain will not bring Ozyllus success.
Ozyllus: "You …"
Abyss: "What name did you say back then?"
Ozyllus grows silent upon hearing the confident and oppressive tone of the demon known as Abyss.
Abyss: "Oh yeah, Ethan Kales."
A smile creeps up on his face.
Abyss: "Let's see what he does about this."
*******************************
Feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments below.
Stay healthy!
Barry: "Why are you crying, Kais?"
I was in a sea of blood with corpses all around. Only one living human stood there; the one who had become a monster.
Kais: "I … don't know."
And in this gruesome event that would haunt the whole world for many coming years, I was sitting on the ground, unable to move, and crying … without even knowing the reason for it.
Barry: "You don't know?"
Kais: "I don't know."
As tears continued to flow down my cheeks, I continue to wonder who they were for.
Barry: "Tell me, do you actually feel sadness that someone has died. Do you actually want to cry over someone present here?"
I didn't. As much as I hate to admit it, I felt no remorse over the death of those people whose corpses had covered my vision. I knew none of them. I didn't want to cry over any of them.
Barry: "Do you feel sadness that I killed them. Are you feeling sad because I did this?"
No, that's not it either. I didn't feel any remorse over Barry having done this. But, I should have. And yet, I didn't.
Barry: "You don't, do you?"
As inhumane as that makes me, it's true. I didn't feel sadness over these things. All I could feel was …
Barry: "You are shocked right now, aren't you?"
I was.
Barry: "Shock is all you feel. You can't even feel fear."
No, I couldn't. I couldn't even fear you back then.
Barry: "Isn't that ironic?"
Kais: "W-what are you saying?"
I just couldn't process anything anymore.
Barry: "You don't know why you are crying, huh?"
I didn't. I just … didn't. Why was I crying? Why was I not crying over things that Barry mentioned? And, if not them, what was I crying for?
Barry: "Let me tell you why you crying then."
Without even thinking for a second, I looked up at him. I wanted to know the answer. I wanted to know why tears would come out of my eyes. I felt like my existence will disappear if I don't find out.
Barry: "You are crying because you can see yourself in me."
He said.
I can see myself in him – is what he said.
What does he mean? I wondered.
He is joking, right? I thought.
He was standing there smiling after having murdered hundreds, thousands of people and I could see myself in him?
What a joke!
I had to be a joke.
It just couldn't be true.
There's no way I can see myself in that monster.
And, somewhere along the lines, I realized how true his words were.
Barry: "That entire time playing house you could only admire that kind, good-natured façade of the man you called your big brother."
Façade, he called it. The image of Barry that was etched in my mind for the first 8-years of my life was being called a façade. I admired that façade.
Barry: "But now that you have seen this horrible side of him, you can relate to him, isn't that true?"
I could admire that façade. But, when that was gone, all that was left now was – the real Barry. But, was that really true? Could someone really be a monster like this?
Barry: "Ah!"
He said as if he was in pain. But how could he feel pain? He was a monster. He was a demon. So, he shouldn't feel any pain, right?
That's right. Monsters like him – they don't feel pain, they just give others pain.
Kais: "You are a monster, aren't you?"
He had turned around and was walking. So,
Kais: "Hey, you are a monster, aren't you?"
I repeated. I shouted out. But, he didn't stop. He was not even flinching. He didn't give a damn about what I was saying.
Kais: "Tell me, this is your true face, isn't it? The façade that you had kept for so long is finally gone now, isn't it?"
My voice – the voice of an eight-year-old rang out. There's no way he couldn't have heard it. But, he ignored it.
He kept walking. He ignored me. He ignored the mass of bodies that he had produced all around us.
Kais: "I … I … am NOT like you."
I shouted at the top of my lungs.
Kais: "I would have never done something like this. You are WRONG."
I knew he wasn't listening. I was well aware he wouldn't listen. But, I had to deny it. I had to deny it for myself. If I didn't, I just couldn't look at myself without remembering him. So, I had to deny it – I had to deny the truth.
Kais: "Ha … ha …"
I held onto my thighs as I panted.
Kais: "Listen to me, damn it!"
More than shouting at Barry to make him listen to me, I was shouting at myself. I was shouting at myself, telling to look away from the truth.
Kais: "I am NOTHING like YOU."
I wasn't trying to convince him, I was trying to convince myself.
And, the more I said it, the more I denied it; the more apparent the reality became. I didn't have what I needed to accept reality and I was not even capable of running away. I was weak beyond any comparison. And then,
Abyss: "Don't run away."
I heard a voice. It was a voice that sounded pained, much more pained than mine.
Kais: "W-who …"
I wanted to ask who he is, but
Abyss: "I am … no one you should concern yourself with."
I was hearing a voice in my head out of nowhere. I couldn't comprehend the absurdity of it and kept talking.
Abyss: "Listen, don't run away."
He told me not to run away.
Kais: "W-why?"
But what else could I do but run away.
Abyss: "You feel pain, don't you?"
He asked me a question – a question that was so easy for me to answer I didn't need to think about it.
Kais: "I do. Of course I do."
Pain had taken over my mind. I couldn't think straight because of it. So of course, the answer was yes.
Abyss: "And you want this pain to go away, don't you?"
Kais: "Y-yeah."
Why won't I? What idiot would not want to say yes to a question like that?
Abyss: "Then do it."
He said in a voice so shaky it seemed as if he was barely holding himself back from shouting.
Kais: "Huh!"
But all I did think of was what he said.
Abyss: "If you don't want to feel pain, then you should make the pain go away."
Kais: "If … it were that simple, then don't you think …"
I would have already done it – is what I wanted to say. But before I could,
Abyss: "It is simple."
He said.
Abyss: "You can do it."
He said.
Abyss: "You are strong enough."
He told me.
Abyss: "You just haven't reached your full potential yet."
He said to me, giving me hope and despair at the same time. I needed that power and I had that power but only inside me, not in my hands. How can I be happy by hearing something like that?
Abyss: "If you want that power,"
And then he said,
Abyss: "I can help you reach it."
I finally understood what he was saying.
Abyss: "So, what do you want?"
He asked in a pained voice that I just couldn't understand the reason for, but I had stopped caring a while back. At that moment, all I cared about was –
Kais: "If I let him go, he'll kill more people."
Abyss: "He definitely would."
Kais: "If I don't stop him, then no one will."
Abyss: "Yes, that is true."
Kais: "He may even kill all my friends at school."
Abyss: "Very likely."
Kais: "He may even kill our parents."
Abyss: "That should be obvious."
Kais: "He may go and kill Sona too."
Abyss: "I bet he will."
Kais: "So,"
Abyss: "So?"
Kais: "I have to stop him, right?"
Abyss: "That'd be for the best, yes."
Kais: "Then,"
Abyss: "Then?"
Kais: "I need … that power."
Abyss: "Yes, you do."
Kais: "You said you can give it to me."
Abyss: "That's more or less what I said."
Kais: "Then, give it to me."
After a constant string of words, a moment's gap occurred. Abyss didn't respond instantly, but after a moment,
Abyss: "As you wish."
He said to me. I was in pan, yes. But I could feel something inside me hurting even more than what that pain ever brought to me. I could feel an ugly presence all around me.
And then when I looked at my hand, I couldn't find it.
Kais: "Where's my arm?"
He didn't reply.
Kais: "Hey, tell me, where's my leg?"
I looked back and forth at the places where my limbs should be but all I could see was some black figure.
Where was my arm? Where was my body? I wondered as I glanced at a corpse. That person had died with a mirror in hand. I took that mirror and looked at it, but all I could see was –
Kais: "Who's that?"
There was a black figure with a familiar haircut and two round glowing similar looking shapes above the center.
Kais: "Who's that?"
Who's that?
Kais: "Who is he?"
Who is he?
Kais: "Who is … I?"
Who am I?
Kais: "Why am I asking that?"
That's such a foolish question.
Kais: "I am Kais of course."
More important than that, what was I doing here? I turned around to try to figure out why I was there.
These thoughts were going in my brain. I didn't understand what had happened but I did understand that I was there for a reason.
Kais: "Barry."
And then I saw him, and I instantly knew why I was there.
Kais: "I see. I remember now."
I remembered why I was there.
Kais: "Die, Barry! Die!"
My words rang out and I used telekinesis to move a rod into Barry's chest. It was one of the many rods lying because of Barry's carnage, it was no special weapon. Barry should have been able to easily deflect it. But he couldn't. That's because it all took place in a fraction of a second.
That was the power that Abyss mentioned. That was the potential that he talked about. My speed, at that moment, was equivalent of light.
Barry: "A-Abyss!"
He said something that I didn't bother hearing. Why would I have bothered to hear it when the 'me' at that moment wasn't even the 'me' that I am?
Kais: "Well, wasn't that easy?"
Having accomplished my task of becoming a murderer, I laughed. My laugh echoed. My echoes rang through my ears. My ears felt numb.
There was … a certain sense of loss in me. I knew that I would no longer be who I used to be.
*******************************
A little confession by the author (Death Note spoilers):
You can see a sad L from Death Note on my profile pic?
The reason that's my profile pic is because it reminds me of Abyss.
Someone who put everything at stake to try to defeat the 'god'.
*****
Feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments below.
Stay healthy!
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