Bab 286: I'm a bad person

"Zhihao!" Xiao Lei gasped. "How could you think like that... They were innocent!"

Xiao Zhihao laughed sadly as he shook his head. "You must have thought that I'm a bad person, right, Mum? Perhaps I'm---" 

"No, never!" Xiao Lei replied vehemently, cutting off whatever self-deprecating words that her son might utter. "You're not a bad person... But you're not being you either..."

"Ever since Dad's gone," he looked at her and said, "I can't be myself anymore." 

He pulled his knees up and wrapped his arms around his knees as he mumbled, "I don't care if everyone hates me, Mum; I just want him here..."

He knew he was being a jerk. He was proud of his father, of course. He knew that his father was a hero, of course. But even with what he knew, he still wanted his father to be here with him. He still wished that his father was a normal man with normal courage. At the very least, he would be home safe and sound.