The chossen heros of Tylingariea

LV 4

MikXL_23

Interesting story, It did manage to catch my attention. And here is my criticism 1- You need to describe the scene and How the characters look. I readed the First chapter and I didn't know How any of the characters there looked like, and that was confusing as hell. When the First female character appeared in book one, I didn't even know If she was an old lady or Just a ***** woman. And you also need to make things more clear when describing them. 2- You need to work on the characters conversations and talks. Instead of Just putting the dialogue in the middle of the pharagraph, you should give them some space. For example: "Hey, How are you?" "I'm fine thanks."

LV 4

Brandongould1994

Hi this is the author Brandon Gould This is my very first book I ever wrote I started it when I was in High School and finshed it when I was 22. so I would like it if you guys could tell me if you like it and I would like honest critue if possible but be nice. I also wrote Demonsong if you are interested