Bab 163: Chapter 160: What it Means to Forgive
Despite my bad luck possibly building something big, we've managed to avoid a killing frenzy from my [Devil Eyes], as well as me learning a trick to keep that and my anger managed. Realizing I had something like this trick on me for such a long time filled me with regret. I'm sure there was a time when I was prone to getting angered when I was young and I resorted to using that trick to calm myself down. If I had to guess why I had forgotten it, it's probably because of how often I've won in fights and got so strong back home on Earth. Getting into fights wasn't as worrisome as before, and I had gotten so much stronger than them that I felt my anger was pointless on those guys. They were just not worth the energy unless they dissed someone I was close to. Overtime, I didn't need to use those tricks, and it just faded away over time.
{To have these tricks and not remember them until now … Sorry, Mom, I guess I let you down this time, but I swear I won't let the [Devil Eyes] skill take control of me. I'll really work to manage my anger. I won't let your teachings that you drilled so much into me go to waste.}
Just so we don't get pulled into further trouble, I used [Portal] to immediately get us back to my room at the inn to regroup and discuss our plans. While I was there, I contacted my Familiars through [Telepathy] to see how their group was doing in gathering supplies. It sounded like they were close to being done, so they'd be heading back to the inn within an hour. My Familiars had also received some 'premonition' that they were tied into something important, which was clearly Obina's work per the agreements in the oath. I told them that I'd explain when they get back, and after I finished that contact, I remembered Tyvera, a former member of the Duke of Demon's Disciples, was with them. {When she comes back, it will be best that we ask her about the other members to see what we may be dealing with here.}
Once I finished my telepathic talk with them, I informed everyone in my group what was going on on their end before we got into discussion. I had set up [Soundproof] in the room, of course, and with Ume and Sue sitting across from me in chairs, I was on the bed with Ren between my legs, giving her the petting treatment I promised her. With Ume's okay, the petting was done while both of us were butt naked. I felt with how stressful today was for both of us, we'd do the petting with more direct intimacy. Ren had no problems and stripped herself down to nothing with no hesitation. Even though I initially intended to do it with both of us topless, I had no complaints of her unreserved nature. With Ren's ass sandwiching my erect cock, I pulled her right up with her back against me before I started petting her, working her head and one of her breasts first. Remembering how good this felt when I did the same with Nyra earlier, I was quickly seeing this as a useful means of stress-relief.
"Does this feel good, Ren?" I asked as I fondled one of her tits.
"Mmh. Hauuu. As expected, Master's petting techniques are extraordinary, and with our skin touching like this … I think I might melt," Ren moaned.
I looked up to Ume and Sue, "Are you both really okay with us doing this while we discuss serious matters?"
"Of course. As your head wife, I want to make sure my husband is happy no matter who he's getting intimate with," Ume said, "Though, I hope you'll give me the same treatment at some point seeing how pleased Ren's looking right now."
"I anticipated this happening before we even met, so I have no problems," Sue added, "Though, it's better to say that this kind of thing is normal between close acquaintances and lovers in the Demon-Kin's Territory. It gives an impression of who's the top dog of the group that visitors must acknowledge and respect, you know? It's a different story if a powerful individual is in the room, like a noble or royalty."
"Huh, so it's like that?" I asked, {Though, what the heck do you mean by 'anticipating' this happening? And aren't you a noble/royal?}
Sue nodded, "It's like that, and … just putting it out there as a reminder, but as my way of apologizing for giving you and Nyra a hard time, my body is also available to use at your leisure. I won't mind you 'petting' me the same as Ren here." Sue's face tinted red while trying to make that point.
"... I'll keep it in mind," I answered, knowing having sex with Sue is also included. With my theory of her possibly being royalty in the air, it's really difficult to think I can get away with something like that. It's hard to decide whether to fondle her loli-oppai boobs like before with that in mind, too. Even now, the thought of possibly copping a feel on royalty, a thing a commoner could only dream of ever happening, had an enticing appeal to it.
I didn't want to fall into such thoughts, so I sate my desire by cupping both of Ren's modest breasts, causing her to tremble in delight. While they weren't large like Ume's or Sue's, Ren's breasts were still big enough to fill up my hands well while being quite soft. {Actually … am I feeling more of Ren's breasts than usual?}
"... Did these get bigger?" I asked aloud.
"Did they really?!" Ren exclaimed excitedly. Her wolf tail whacked against me with the same mood.
To confirm, I used my [Size Up] skill that reads a woman's three sizes as well as her status. I only found this out after appraising Ren the first time, and I could still remember her numbers from back then.
"... Ohh, it looks like you went up by about 2 centimeters," I said.
"2 centimeters! This is the best news I've heard all day!" Ren exclaimed while pumping her fists in the air.
{Better than the power up from your collar earlier?! Are you that bothered by your breast size?!}
Sue cleared her throat, "Well, congratulations aside, are there any other personal things that need to be discussed before we move onto quest-related matters?"
"May I just say something about that bastard of a Lizardman?" Ume asked while furrowing her brow, "While Jin was falling to the [Devil Eyes]' effects, I was mentioning how much I wanted to kill him right there for dissing my husband like that."
"You're not alone on that," I said, "Even now, despite how calm I may look, I still want to do unspeakable things to him, with or without the [Devil Eyes]' power."
"What if, the next time he tries anything involving me while either of us are alone with him, one of us takes his head and shows it to the other, proving that the bastard is dead?" Ume suggested as she approached me from the side.
"And after that, we'll see his harem together and show them that their beloved mate is gone because of us?" I followed.
"And once they see how superior you are, you seduce them into joining your harem, making their late mate writhe in the afterlife agonizingly by taking his females as your own?" Ume finalized before using her [Sadistic Smile] to add suspense to our plan, baring her sharp, pointed Dragon teeth.
The sight sent pleasant shivers down my spine, "I love that we're both on the same page."
"I love you."
"I love you more."
Having a mutual agreement, Ume and I sealed the deal with a tender, loving kiss. Ren shared our enthusiasm with a sensual howl as I gave her breasts a good squeeze.
<Ah, a match made in heaven … or would you both be in hell after going through all that?> Nyra asked as we broke the kiss.
Ume then moved behind me and started giving me a shoulder massage while I still 'petted' Ren. Despite my wife having reptilian claws, her massage techniques were superb, as if she spent centuries of her lifespan perfecting the [Massage] skill. It was like all the stress and tensions built on my shoulders from today were melting away under her unique touch. This was surely the effect of her new 'Legendary Housewife' ability she received as a gift from Obina. {Legendary, indeed, just how did I have the luck to receive this special treatment from such a loving wife?}
"I have no objections with that plan and will even cooperate if needed, so it looks like we're all in agreement on that," Sue said in regards to our assassination plot against Krigeran, "Anything else?"
"Right, I have something to ask of Ren," I said while giving her breasts their needed attention, "The things you said to that gang, was all of that true?"
"Hauu! Of course! As a lover and slave, I deliberate very heavily on my master's good points so everyone would know how amazing he is!" she exclaimed with pride.
"Then, can you tell me what it was that made you think I forgive people?" I asked, "Not only do I find that odd to point out in your speech, but I don't really see myself as that forgiving of a person. What we just talked about with Krigeran should speak levels of how 'forgiving' I am."
"Well, that's a given, because it doesn't look like he'll apologize and seek your forgiveness," Ren said before looking up in thought, "If I were to explain what makes you forgiving, well … there was how you handled that flower pot thing, for one."
"Is it really that big of a deal?" I asked with a raised brow.
"Let me put it this way," Sue answered for Ren, "If it were another demon, even if they were a commoner who had high defenses like you, there's a high chance they'd use that as an excuse to scam that Imp. 'Oww, I think I might have a concussion, how are you going to take responsibility for this?' Would be something they'd use to intimidate her before taking practically everything she's got. If not that, the next likely thing they'd do would be to beat that Imp senseless as 'punishment' for injuring someone more superior than her, maybe even to the point of death."
"It's that serious?" I asked with widened eyes.
Thinking back on that Imp woman's, Mincy's, behavior, her concern may be sincere, but part of her motives might be to lessen the 'punishment' enacted on her for causing me injury.
Sue nodded solemnly, "While we're on the subject, let's say it was a Devil, a superior race among the Demon-Kin, who dropped the flower pot on you. Since it's you, a 'human' who's most likely weaker than them, they wouldn't give a rat's ass over your health. 'It's their fault for being too weak to get hurt over something like that,' would be one of their lines of thinking. And if you were to confront them on it? Their 'apology' would be shallow, if you're lucky to get one. Instead, they'd be more likely to intimidate you out of dropping the subject. 'Oh? But I didn't do it? Are you accusing me? Is that a challenge?' It would be like that before things escalate from there."
{Wooow, I could even hear that Klash guy saying all that if he dropped the flower pot on me. How very scum-like.}
"That's how most Devils in this territory were raised to be, anyway" Sue continued while shrugging, "Since some Demon Kings in the past have been Devils, including Her Highness, not to mention they were said to have some connections with the Immortals, they've developed a large ego in that they're the 'superior race' among the Demon-Kin. With the power they hold in their [Devil Eyes], their superiority seems to be a sure thing."
"But the current Demon King is different from other Devils?" I asked.
She nodded, "Because of her upbringing by her father, the previous Demon King, as well as his goal of making peace between the other territories, Her Highness wants to follow in his footsteps for that peace and make the Demon-Kin's Territory a better kingdom for all races, including those from the Demi and Human-Kin.
"Alas, there are nobles who oppose Her Highness' goals, as well as her father's, and are plotting to seize the throne as we speak," Sue said while resting a hand to her cheek in shame and pity, "Things are improving in the kingdom, but the hierarchical wall in both political and combat strength between Demon races is still quite high. Any display of kindness could be seen as weakness in the upper-power's eyes. That's why brushing off the flower pot incident is like a saint granting forgiveness to the general public."
"Wait, but you seemed quite peeved over that Imp even though I brushed it off? If you're trying to follow the Demon King's example of fairness to all races and social classes, then weren't you quite harsh towards her?" I argued with a raised brow.
"... I have my reasons for reacting the way I did, but thinking back with a clear mind, yes, you're right on that, Jinma. If that displeases you, I'll take this as a learning experience and reflect on it, hoping I won't repeat this mistake in the future," Sue answered calmly while bowing her head with humility.
I was surprised how Sue took that criticism so well. It was about the same as when Ren made her outburst about the Demon King at the junkyard, though the difference here was that the criticism from me was directed at this disguised Devil. Sue's promise to avoid being that harsh again seemed to hold quite a bit of weight since it 'displeased me'. It almost made me uneasy. For some reason, I felt I had to correct this.
"Erm … I wouldn't say I was displeased at that time, just surprised, and I just wanted to confirm your convictions," I said, "I may not know what your reasons were for acting that way, but if you realized what you did was wrong, just try to improve on your own merits at your own pace. Don't just take priority of my feelings over yours."
"I do want to improve on my own merits, really," Sue assured, "In fact, I'm grateful to you for pointing out that mistake. If it's not too much trouble, I'd be most appreciated if you could give me more criticisms like that moving forward. In pursuit to become a person you can trust and accept in all their being, like I want to towards you, as well as making up for my wrong towards you, I believe this much is necessary."
{I feel like this just got much heavier. Like I'm appointed as someone's advisor. Would I not have thought this way if I didn't suspect Sue of being a noble, much less a royal?}
<She seems genuine with her request, too. You gotta give her props for asking that much towards someone she wronged,> Nyra said, reading my thoughts.
"I … guess I'll try to keep it in mind while I observe you," I answered to Sue, "And it wasn't like you totally screwed up back there in the flower pot thing. Nyra sensed you were really trying to restrain yourself from possibly getting worse, so that tells me you're already trying to improve yourself, so … nice work? Though, it might be best for you to find some outlet to vent your emotions if keeping yourself in check takes that much effort. Trying to choke down those negative emotions is as unhealthy and bad for you as taking it out on someone who may not deserve it."
Sue using that trick to calm me down earlier might have worked, but I only see that beneficial for the short term to clear my senses. I still wanted to kill Krigeran for making moves on Ume, but I was surprised how possessive I seemed back there. I'm not sure if those were my true feelings or if it was the [Devil Eyes] having a lingering effect on me.
Sue, surprised at my evaluation, nodded lightly, "Y-Yes, an outlet, that would be helpful. Though, what can I use that would be helpful to me?"
"Well, talking about it would be a good start, venting it all out. You can do that to me if you're comfortable with it," I suggested.
"I-Is that really … okay?" Sue asked, to which I nodded, "O-Okay, I'll keep it in mind, and thank you for noticing how hard I tried to hold myself back. I really do appreciate that ..." When Sue trailed off, she gazed down reservedly. She looked like she wanted to say something else, but held herself back.
{… Ah, maybe it's that?}
"Sue, come here for a moment," I said while beckoning her over.
Sue looked confused as she approached me, then widened her eyes in surprise as I petted her head.
"You … did good back there, Sue. Good girl," I praised awkwardly.
Sue's entire head flushed, heating up like steam would blow from her pointed ears at any moment. She had an awkward, bashful smile and looked down while she received the praise. "Th-Thanguu …" she flubbed.
<Ohh! You guessed she wanted a form of praise for her hard work without me telling you! I'm impressed!> Nyra said.
<She couldn't ask for that kind of treatment because of how guilty she is. Praising someone's hard work where it's due is also essential for them to improve themselves. If she's this happy with this much, I don't mind humoring her to this extent,> I reasoned.
"Ah, there's that, too, another of Master's saintly kindness," Ren said, picking back up our earlier conversation on my 'forgiving nature'.
I also just realized we were both still naked as I patted Sue's head while Ume was massaging my shoulders, creating a weird image in the room, but I tried to overlook that.
"What do you mean, Ren?" I asked.
"Though you had every right to kill Sue for messing with yours and Nyra's memories, she did come out to you without resisting when you confronted her, right?" Ren asked, recalling the memories I shared with her through Nyra's magic, "She's still dubious with what other information she may be hiding, and you may be keeping her around to learn more about the Demon King, but you're also gauging whether you can trust her by observing her actions, right? Doesn't that show you want to forgive Sue, but you're not sure if you should?"
We all fell into silence, my hand stopped petting Sue's head, and she looked up to me with an unreadable expression.
{I … want to forgive Sue? Is that what it looks like? Were there ever other times when I had such motives? Me wanting to forgive someone, despite how much they wronged me? What does it mean to forgive in the first place?}
"... I'm sorry, I said something weird, didn't I?" Ren asked while her ears folded back.
"No, it's not your fault," I said while using my other hand to pet her head, "I was just thinking how you define 'forgiveness' might be totally different from what my interpretation is."
"Well, however 'forgiveness' is interpreted, the fact that Jinma is kinder than most remains the same, and I don't ever want to betray that kindness again," Sue said while looking at me with upturned eyes with my hand still on her head, "Thank you, Jinma, for at least giving me a chance to make it up to you. If there were more good Demons like you, this kingdom would surely be much more peaceful."
Something in what Sue last said made me remember something in my childhood memories. It was the one after I was released from the hospital that showed up in a recent dream.
{"Jin-chan is a 'good demon,' after all!"} the young Hyo-chan from my memories exclaimed, making a statement by using my name in a bad pun. I could still remember how her big, bright smile would warm my heart, knowing I was able to bring that out of her.
"A good demon, huh …" I muttered under my breath, wrapping my arms around Ren's waist and pulled her into an embrace, {Wonder how much of that is still true? And … would Hyo-chan still call me a 'good demon' if she saw how I am now?}
PERTIMBANGAN PENCIPTA 
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