Bab 100: Chapter 100- Regrets
Ze Yang sighed after closing the door behind him. He threw the keys onto the table and crushed the keychain with him and Qi Wing's picture on it. He rubbed his forehead as he flipped through the pages of Qi Wing's diary. Almost every page had Shi Xue's name on it repeatedly. If one didn't know her, they would've thought that Shi Xue is someone she loved. The whole diary from page 1 till the last page were all thoughts and comparisons with Shi Xue.
Qi wing had cursed Shi Xue for having bigger eyes, straighter nose, rosy lips and etc. She cursed Shi Xue for having a decent guy that's better than her single ass in life. Her scheme began when her friends sent her a picture of Shi Xue happily hugging Ze Yang's arm while shopping at the mall. Every step along the way was a scheme. The things that Qi Wing claimed as her 'effort' in supporting Ze Yang were all lies. She secretly spoke with Shi Xue and it was Shi Xue who had done all the supporting actions. Shi Xue never told him because she didn't feel like it's something she needed to say. Qi Wing mocked her countless times throughout the whole diary about Shi Xue's stupidity and naiveness for not telling Ze Yang all the things that she had done for him.
All along... all along till today, he had thought that Qi Wing was the one who helped him through all these hard times. Yet, it was all a lie and he was a chess piece. he thought this woman had loved him wholeheartedly so he believed in everything that she said. Who would've known that these actions were all done by the silly girl whom he detested and hurt till she died...?
Suddenly, warm drops of liquid dripped down his face. Sobs filled the living room. His heart felt like someone had squeezing it and stirring it in the blending machine. It hurt so bad that he was suffocating. He started to remember the things that she used to do at home for him. In addition to the things that she's done for him behind his back for his career... his happiness... yet all he cared about was himself.
He started recalling memories of coming back to the apartment looking extremely exhausted and skipping his meal. She would bring him a cup of warm milk and wait for him to finish it. After he drank it, she would have him lay his head on her lap and rubbed his hair gently while asking him about his day. He used to rant and complain about his workload and stress to her, as she warmly smiled back. He thought that she was useless and could only listen to his rants. He never knew that each word that he ranted out of his mouth would be her effort behind the scenes to make his work days better. People started greeting him because she had done a lot to set up a good connection for him. He thought because of her useless business skills, it couldn't be her doing. Must have been his own efforts.
There were times where he gets home from work drunk and becomes aggressive. Sometimes it'll be due to work issues and he would vent it out on her. She would silently cry by herself and comfort him back the next day saying that he worked too hard so it is fine. She would offer endless warmth and love for someone like him. She helped him so much, yet never said a word to him. She loved him for who he is and never changed. She never thought less of him and would only support him...
Ze Yang's blurred eyes looked around the apartment carefully. The kitchen was where she used to make his meals no matter how early or late it is. She would wait till he gets off from work and cook his favorite dishes. Her cooking wasn't extremely good, but was decent and tasteful. She enjoyed cooking for him and would always hum during her cooking. After the meal's done, she would call for him to come and eat the food. He always waited until the food turned cold then come out. She knew his habits, so she would always time him and heat up the cook right before he comes out so the food would be ready for his stomach.
When he forgot about their anniversary, she didn't request any compensation or compromise. She didn't get upset or mad, probably because she hid her feelings from him. He only wanted her to submit to him and give herself to him. He was rejected countless times because she refused to go all the way. She even died without having any happiness she wished to have.
Countless times, she had repeated her dream of marrying the one she loved and having kids with him. She told him her life's plan carefully and detailedly as if she could see it happening in front of her. She was so silly that she thought Ze Yang would propose and got all excited for nothing. It was also on that date, when he and Q Wing cheated, that she was going to tell him that she was ready for him. She didn't want to wait till marriage because she wanted to love him wholeheartedly. But he ended up not coming back the whole night. That night never came and wont ever come.
Ze Yang's tears uncontrollably flowed down his face. His heart felt so much guilt and indescribable pain that he wished he could scream out in agony. He never expected that all along it was the girl whom he claimed to hate to be the one who supported him from beginning till end. She planned to give herself to him, yet that night Qi Wing had knew her plans beforehand so she purposely chose that night to snatch him away!. He thought of all the bad times that he had made her go through... it wasn't her fault at all. These smooth contracts and career that he had gotten himself into, were all because of Shi Xue.
Status Power Mingguan
-- Peringkat
Power 
-- Power
stone