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In the Three Kingdoms with a System! Orisinil

In the Three Kingdoms with a System!

War 73 Bab 1.1M Dilihat

3.45 (11 peringkat)

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Ringkasan

Tianlong was a historian, who was killed by an evil spirit that escaped the spirit road and brought five evil spirits, with it. So come, follow Tianlong on a journey as he travels, in the Three Kingdoms making a name for himself, while tracking down an evil spirit which escaped into the Three Kingdoms. (PS, This is my first time writing a story like this and would like good, bad, and positive criticization, to see what I could fix in the story. Help is always appreciated, also this is an alternate timeline where it follows a slightly altered history of the three kingdoms and shall show another possibility if Lu Bu made a decision, to set up somewhere else where he could grow, contest, and vie for power with Cao Cao, Liu Bei, and Sun Ce.) The ranks of the generals are inspired by the novel, My, Father, In-Law Is Lu Bu. you can get a clear description of them there than here.
https://imgur.com/gallery/TcMfSPM not my pic can be found here

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Penggemar

  1. Issac_Thornbrugh_7566
    Issac_Thornbrugh_7566 Berpartisipasi 3
  2. kalibord
    kalibord Berpartisipasi 3
  3. ILaksana
    ILaksana Berpartisipasi 3

Status Power Mingguan

Rank -- Peringkat Power
Stone -- Power stone

Anda Mungkin Juga Menyukai

11Ulasan-ulasan

3.45

  • Kualitas penulisan
  • Stabilitas Pembaruan
  • Pengembangan Cerita
  • Desain Karakter
  • Latar Belakang Dunia

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Tulis ulasan
The_Faggotten_Ones

Bro, you need to chill, theres something called pre-conflict, conflict, post-conflict. but you just put conflict everywhere, chill bro, take your time when writing this novel, put a bit of filler chapter is fine too so that the story doesn't always feels so tense... Yes i know that this was a war and military novel, but if its fills with to much war it will become boring later on, your story feels better after the post-war, the story become alive but pity suddenly its war again... The ones that obstruct the story progression is actually the system itself, the system is TOO user friendly, army, training and so on the mc can just use it instantly(i dont know because the author didn't explain it, cmiiw), when actually its better to just put a chapter how you build and train your army(according to skill books) and make a bonds with them, its just feels weird when you have an army come out of thin air... The story rarely have enemy pov(or non-existent maybe?), and its always party1 and party2, theres no info about the other warlords. well, this is the first time you write a novel so i let this one pass, maybe you can do this later on when you already experienced enough... this novel is fine, but i hope you become better and better on writing this novel... thank you...

5yr
Lihat 2 balasan
TempestWolf1013

Wish the writing was better and chapters are longer but hey no ones perfect just keep it up and slowly improve and edit the chapters down the line Thanks for the chapters

5yr
Lihat 0 balasan
GSOMP
LV 4 Badge

Should use less shaa shaa and actual words. Must be more descriptive.rather than using techniques name best to include what they mean a straight thrust,swipe etc.Plot is interesting but readers get lost.......

5yr
Lihat 1 balasan
Arcane1111

I realllllllyyyyyy love this novel sadly the author doesnt update that much but im really into the three kingdoms war as well as lubu. I wish you could continue writing and updating this man youre doing an awesome job and i know authors dont get appreciated much in webnovel but i really am. Big fan of your work Godbless and keep safe.

4yr
Lihat 9 balasan
agaxent

My head hurts this novel is a mess 97% .. Mess mess mess mess my god................................... .................. ..... ..... ..... ...........

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4yr
Lihat 0 balasan
sage_of_balance

I really liked the story, the character has a fairly decent development and I really like how the author added the whole tsar and mc rivalry angle it has a lot of potential for development. that said the writing quality is subpar at best and the update schedule is non existent. I personally think the story has been dropped and hope the author proves me wrong.

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3yr
Lihat 0 balasan
Kenlinvert1

Hi there! Are you looking for inspiration? You might want to check out our Prompts Writing contest! Apocalypse, Isekai, LitRPG... Follow the three provided prompts and take the chance to win up to $2,000! Please Google 70daysthemedwritingchallenge to find out more! This contest is free entry and open to any writer at any country. If you had any query, please feel free to contact litrpgwritingcontest_review@hotmail.com Good luck for writing!

4yr
Lihat 0 balasan
gee_ringdomstories

Hey there! Good day for writing! If you wanted to check whether you can get paid by distributing the current work or getting financial support by writing new work, you might want to contact geekyteddyyo@gmail.com. A brief introduction, some sample chapters or links will be appreciated when reaching out.

4yr
Lihat 0 balasan
Tusk5
LV 4 Badge

[img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar][img = recomendar]

4yr
Lihat 0 balasan
Kilex
LV 11 Badge

A good story with a very erratic update schedule. We may not see a chapter in half a year but the writing is good and the story has a lot of potential.

4yr
Lihat 0 balasan
Hanol
LV 14 Badge

I could not make it past chapter 6 the grammar is terrible i have no idea who is talking your story needs to either be rewritten or have someone go and edit everything your story is confusing.I loved the setting three kingdoms period but sadly its not readable.

5yr
Lihat 1 balasan

Jilid 1 : Conquest of Dunhuang

  1. 1
    Prologue 5 years ago
  2. 2
    Chapter.1 Reincarnation!! 5 years ago
  3. 3
    Chapter.2 My father is Lu Bu!!!!!! 5 years ago
  4. 4
    Chapter.3 Three Years 5 years ago
  5. 5
    Chapter.4 Father’s Rebel 5 years ago
  6. 6
    Chapter.5 Ten Years Later 5 years ago
  7. 7
    Chapter.6 First War!!! 5 years ago
  8. 8
    Chapter.7 Lu Tianlong! 5 years ago
  9. 9
    Chapter.8 Start of the battle!!! 5 years ago
  10. 10
    Chapter.9 First Clash!!!! 5 years ago
  11. 11
    Chapter.10 Lu Tianlong’s Ability!!!! 5 years ago
  12. 12
    Chapter.11 First Duel!!! 5 years ago
  13. 13
    Chapter.12 Victory and Experience of Life and Death!!!! 5 years ago
  14. 14
    Chapter.13 Respect!! 5 years ago
  15. 15
    Chapter.14 Promotion and reposition!!! 5 years ago
  16. 16
    Chapter.15 New Front and Mighty General Zhang Liao!!!! 5 years ago
  17. 17
    Chapter.16 Lu Tianlong’s Speech 5 years ago
  18. 18
    Chapter.17 Massacre and another Life and Death fight!!! 5 years ago
  19. 19
    Chapter.18 Fight to the Death!!!! 5 years ago
  20. 20
    Chapter.19 Injured!!!! 5 years ago
  21. 21
    Chapter.20 Reaching First-Class General!!! 5 years ago
  22. 22
    Chapter.21 Gacha Spin! 5 years ago
  23. 23
    Chapter.22 AN SSS RANK ITEM AND AN A RANK ITEM!!! 5 years ago
  24. 24
    Chapter.23 Dominating Blood Wolf Army!!! 5 years ago
  25. 25
    Chapter.24 Father and Son Meet!!! 5 years ago
  26. 26
    Chapter.25 Youngest First-Class General alive!! 5 years ago
  27. 27
    Chapter.26 Instinct!!! 5 years ago
  28. 28
    Chapter.27 Sound of Might the Right Flanks Ferocious Charge!!! 5 years ago
  29. 29
    Chapter.28 Bitter Brawl!! 5 years ago
  30. 30
    Chapter.29 Breakthrough!!! 5 years ago
  31. 31
    Chapter.30 Slaughter! 5 years ago
  32. 32
    Chapter.31 The Rights Unstoppable Momentum 5 years ago
  33. 33
    Chapter.32 The Rights Victory 5 years ago
  34. 34
    Chapter.33 Ma Ai’s Retreat!! 5 years ago
  35. 35
    Chapter.34 Birth of a Legend 5 years ago
  36. 36
    Chapter.35 Final Battle!! 5 years ago
  37. 37
    Chapter.36 Lu Tianlong’s strategy 5 years ago
  38. 38
    Chapter.37 Eastern Walls Breakthrough!!! 5 years ago
  39. 39
    Chapter.38 Stalemate of the West 5 years ago
  40. 40
    Chapter.39 Victory of Dunhuang!!! 5 years ago