Bab 363: Anna's concern
"So, tell me. what's up?" Lillian said to park her car. She intends to get dinner on her way home and stopped at a restaurant to buy food.
Anna was getting distracted by the previous conversation that she forgot what went into her intention while calling her friend.
"You're asking me that now?" Anna teased.
"I'm sorry! I was oblivious."
Anna forgave quickly, brushing off to express her wish to solely talk to Lillian as it's been a while since they spoke to each other.
"You know I'm busy with all the invitations around the holidays," Anna explained.
"Every day we go to someplace to meet with friends, family or businessmen- dine with them- then talk-" she paused, swallowing the rest.
Lillian quietly listened to inquire about Jake's well-being.
"Jake- He's fine!"
It was a straightforward answer but lacked complete enthusiasm, which made Lillian carry the worry torch.
"Anna?" she called.
"Yes,"
"What happened?" Lillian confronted her directly.
"What? Nothing, I only wanted to hear your voice. Are you going home this year?"
It was clear that Anna conspired to divert the subject. Lillian hesitated but still answered her precisely.
"No, I am planning to stay here."
"This year too! Edwin misses you, and you know that!" Anna raged.
Her plan worked as she quickly dived deep to grill Lillian's decision.
"I know, but I got him a good Christmas present this year. You should see-"
Lillian exaggerated to explain how she chose a thoughtful Christmas gift for Edwin Grey and how it will assuredly surprise him despite her absence. Nonetheless, as if her rants fell on deaf ears, Anna appeared thoroughly unimpressed.
She interrupted, unable to keep listening.
Thankfully, Lillian was able to place her order and wait. She moved to a warm spot to continue her conversation with Anna.
"Lillian! The presents won't make him happy. It's you. What's with you- you can go visit him any time you want, but you don't do it!"
"I know! But-"
"Think about your father! I know he might not say it out loud, but he is your family, and he would miss you-"
"I know, Anna!" Lillian exclaimed.
Anna continued to speak for Edwin's sake. She advised Lillian to care for her father. Since Lillian's mother's death, Edwin's always been single. He does appear tough to everyone. Regardless, a man could still go weak from losing the love of his life. With Lillian dropping her visits, especially during holidays, it could make Edwin feel more vulnerable.
Anna suggested Lillian be considerate towards her father and requested to reconsider visiting him during the holidays.
Finally, moved by her sincere effort, Lillian agreed to reflect on Anna's advice.
"Promise?" Anna asked.
"I said I'll see if I can drop by-"
Anna's expectations dropped lower from hearing Lillian still protest.
Lillian could undoubtedly sense Anna's disappointment. She corrected her words.
"I- I promise I will consider seriously about visiting him if-"
Everything went well until that 'if' and the pause startled Anna this time.
"If you tell me what is going on with you," Lillian dared.
Lillian's checkmate returned the trouble for Anna. She tried to brush off again, but it recoiled as Lillian won't take another answer but the truth.
"I know you called me because you are worried. Please cut with distracting me and speak. What happened? Did something happen with Jake? Did you guys fight?"
Lillian's insane assumptions worn out Anna. She kept denying every accusation. It was only a matter of time before Lillian ran out of questions and began to demand Anna to spill the beans.
"Anna?" Her voice raised out of frustration. It drew the stranger's attention as she was still waiting inside the restaurant.
Lillian excused and came rushing outside. It appears that it is going to take a while for her order to get done.
"Start talking, or I'll raid your place right now-"
Anna deeply exhaled, no longer able to deceive.
"Everyone keeps mentioning baby talks-"
Finally, admitting it eased her a bit. The tension in her mind ceased somehow while sharing it with a close acquaintance.
"Who's everyone?" Lillian asked.
"Jake's family, our mutual friends, even a few from work-"
Lillian Grey did not expect this to be the topic of interest. It didn't occur to her until Anna spilled everything by herself. Now it all makes sense with Anna contemplating whether to speak out or not.
"It is not too soon-" Lillian remarked.
"But people keep addressing it- directly or indirectly."
Anna kept sighing nonstop. Lillian gave her the space to express herself. It must have been tough for Anna to accept other's opinions in regards to her family matter. Lillian was unsure what people told to hurt her friend like this, so she decided to dig for more details.
"Anna, tell me what happened!" Lillian requested.
Anna shared a little flashback to her busiest days of the year, which is the holidays. Anna and Jake get invited to various events, and these parties especially begin with colleagues to close friends, people from the business circle, and eventually settle to family and relatives. As Christmas nears, Jake and Anna's endless party train reaches its destination, the family and relatives.
These are grand parties with close acquaintances necessarily opens out all gossips. People have fun teasing or bringing up topics to chat randomly.
Anna loved these parties as they are a great way to decompress the stress along with a glass of wine. However, as years passed, the interest in certain subjects progressed. Jake and Anna's friends occasionally ask whether the couple is planning to have a child or not. Anna's mood plummeted this holiday season since the baby talk kept repeating on every single occasion.
The rally prolonged until on such a recent lunch date where the couple dined with Jake's parents and Anna's patience finally snapped.
Jake's cousin, who attended the lunch date, made a random suggestion that the couple can consider pregnancy through a surrogate mother. The cousin being already aware of Anna's miscarriage boldly addressed his opinion on the basis of Anna having trouble conceiving a child. The cousin brother's rude proposal received wrath treatment from Jake, who exploded right away.
Even now, Anna could remember the heated moment where Jake erupted in the middle of their lunch date and how much strength did Anna exert to calm her husband.
Lillian Grey, who patiently heard through the story, finally collected her takeout food and went back to her ride. She kept quietly listening to Anna's story, hearing her spill everything about how upset it was facing people.
"So, what did Jake say?" Lillian asked, keeping an eye on the road while driving.
Anna's voice regained some strength as she revealed.
**
Jake put his fork harshly against the plate, making a loud noise to shut his cousin brother from spitting more nonsense. His face was seething with madness as he is controlling himself to be polite about it.
His move bought forth attention from everyone as expected. Jake's parents watched him in a daze, especially his mother, who guessed the reason behind his sudden outburst. She regretted sitting away from him and only wished that Anna could hold him off for now.
However, the abrasive comment in front of everyone already defeated poor Anna. She lost track of Jake by her side and kept on grieving to herself.
By her side, Jake kept silent until he could feel everyone's eyes staring at him. He lifted his face, looking straight at his cousin brother, who is entirely perplexed by the change of atmosphere.
"Did I say something wrong?" he asked, smiling weakly while looking at the others for support.
"Yes."
Jake replied.
The cousin brother's thin smile disappeared. His face turned red from the embarrassment.
"I didn't say anything wrong," he claimed.
"No! You were wrong," Jake countered back.
Returning to the heavy silence filled with back and forth disputing, Anna finally noticed. She came back to reality to find her husband wrangling with his cousin. However, without context, Anna was clueless about their discord.
"I only made a suggestion since your wife is afraid to have a child,"
The cousin's crude remark snapped everyone at the table. Jake's father called him out with a harsh stare, signaling him to stop running his mouth.
"Why such a big deal! I was trying to help," the cousin grunted.
Jake no longer kept his composure. He left his seat to stand up in the heat.
"I never asked for anyone's help. Also, there is nothing wrong with my wife or me. We don't need to hear suggestions from others. Let me be clear about this- If I want to have kids, I want Anna to be their mother. So, stop pressuring us."
Jake left his seat in haste.
Anna halfway recognized what caused this upset. She tried to comfort Jake, but he refused her straightaway. He had enough of others indirectly aiming to insult his wife, and when cousin brother had to take the extra effort in offending, he erupted.
**
"Wow, Jake's so cool!"
"I only want Anna to be the mother!" Lillian repeated the phrase in awe.
"Stop it, Lillian," Anna cried.
"Why? Did you not like the way he reacted? Please don't say yes."
"No. It's not like that. It's-" Anna hesitated to reveal how it was Jake's first time raising his voice against everyone's presence.
"Of course! Don't think it is only you. Jake feels equally responsible for all these comments. I think he was getting hurt just like you, and it exploded when that stupid cousin of his made such ridiculous suggestion," Lillian observed.
"Anna, you know how there's always one person who, despite knowing already, touches the sensitive side brazenly. Just ignore- well, how are you dealing with all this? Does- Did Jake take out his anger on you too?" Lillian tried to encourage Anna but soon fell into anxiety when assuming if Jake's anger ended up hurting his beloved wife.
"No. No. Jake doesn't. You know him, Lillian. He-" Anna chuckled.
"He keeps comforting me. I feel bad for him."
Lillian's worry faded into the air. She was waiting in another signal where her eyes randomly caught the sight of a little boy sitting on his father's shoulders as the mother fed him bites of cotton candy. It was a warm scene to look at, where Lillian pictured Anna and Jake in their place. She wondered how sweet the moment if Anna and Jake were to take a stroll on a winter night as Christmas approaches, along with their child who's pampering for his favorite toy or a doll.
Just the imagination let Lillian roam into a separate journey. She snapped out of it when the honking noise dragged her away from her fantasy. Returning to driving, she heard Anna still going on about Jake.
"I feel like I'm punishing him, Lillian because you should've seen his face. It's Jake's wish to become a father. He loves children, and you should see- you should see how he plays with Lia- even I get jealous at what kind of father he would become-"
"What do you think, Anna?" Lillian interrupted her on a whim.
"About what?"
Lillian hesitated, pondering to herself. However, the image she just envisioned encouraged her to speak out.
"About trying for a child again?"
Lillian's face crumpled in fear, wondering how Anna's reacting on the other side. As expected, silence filled the space as Anna didn't respond.
It was the perfect opportunity for Lillian to try and persuade Anna. She wanted to give Anna the little push to be more confident about herself.
"Don't you think it's been a while now?" Lillian began.
"I'm not saying you should- but you could keep trying and-"
"I'm scared, Lillian," Anna's voice reappeared to admit blatantly.
"I'm scared if there's going to be another accident. I can't take another defeat, Lillian," Anna spoke softly, voicing out her genuine concern.
"I agree. But, what if this time's the charm?
Anna's silence prolonged, revealing the shift in her train of thoughts.
Lillian requested Anna to ignore Jake and take this moment to ask herself what is that she wishes. Anna followed to question herself, and it couldn't be more clear that just like her husband, Jake, Anna wishes as much as to become a mother.
Anna's fear conquers her every time someone brings out the baby talk. This fear influenced others to be wary near her. Including her family and friends to avoid addressing this topic until recently.
Lillian had a similar effect, but the mirroring imagery of Anna and Jake with their child dared her to cross the line with conviction.
Lillian's reassuring words drove Anna to the edge of the cliff.
Following her endless pursuit in convincing her friend, Lillian ended her speech on a note that conveyed no matter what that Anna should never feel the burden or carry it on her own.
"I want to say that guys like Jake are rare, so don't feel afraid. You hear stories about how people keep trying until it happens- Plus, I'm feeling it this time, Anna. I'm not saying this for the sake of satisfying you. Honestly, I feel this time it's going to happen," Lillian spoke positively.
"You believe in your husband already, but this time, I want you to keep that faith onto yourself."
Anna exhaled.
"Fine. I'll think about it."
"It's alright. Your fear is completely natural, but don't let it dominate you. I know for a fact that both of you seriously want to have a child. It's none of my business as well, so speak with Jake if it still bothers you- I'm sure he is always looking out for you."
"I understand."
In a sense, it was comforting for Anna to hear such words from Lillian.
"By the way, how bold of you to talk all this- where are you right now? At home? Where's Jake?" Lillian asked out of interest.
Seeing how Anna openly talks about herself, Lillian got concerned with Jake's whereabouts.
Having encountered a harsh lunch date with his family, Jake got himself drunk under hard liquor. Anna let him do as he pleased.
"Drunk and asleep! He must have gotten hurt," Lillian exclaimed.
"That's why I let him drink," Anna sighed again to announce another dinner date with her parents tomorrow.
"You guys should tone it down, honestly," Lillian revealed.
"You're partying way too much. Maybe you should rest tomorrow. Talk to your parents, Anna," Lillian proposed.
It is necessary to spend the holidays at home with family. However, having a large social circle and a great rapport with their families, Anna and Jake have no option but to spend time evenly with everyone.
Following their lunch date with Jake's parents, Anna already confirmed the dinner plans with her family. She admitted not being sure to cancel the appointment as it would make them feel bad.
Lillian allowed Anna to make the final call, as it is their decision.
Anna realized how time flew by from talking to each other. She asked if Lillian was still driving. The long traffic and busy road stretched the ride, and Lillian admitted stopping by to get dinner.
"What did you get?" Anna asked.
She was no longer feeling suffocated, and her voice sounded much lighter than before.
"Lemon chicken with roasted sweet potatoes, and- a whole apple pie-" Lillian answered.
"Too much!" Anna gasped.
"I'm suddenly starving," Lillian exclaimed.
"Of course, you would," Anna teased.
Lillian smiled mutely, ignoring the indirect remark. The two friends laughed it out, one overjoyed from making happy memories while the other had enough from facing tough times. Having both expressed themselves, Anna thanked Lillian for listening to her. It was a sudden pleasure in hearing her confess with such sincerity.
Lillian returned her gratefulness, thanking Anna for calling at the right moment.
Anna wished Lillian to return home soon. She placed her request once again to have Lillian consider visiting her father for Christmas.
Lillian pledged to respect her wish.
Soon their call ended on a sweet note. Listening to Anna's voice, Lillian grasped that her words marked an impact. She allowed Anna to rest early.
Shortly after ending their call, Lillian reached her place. She parked her car to go straight home.
As mentioned before, the starvation doubled as soon as she entered home. Lillian immediately sat down to devour the chicken and potatoes. Dinner ended in haste, with Lillian carrying the box of apple pie to the couch. She opened a bottle of fresh wine to pair with her dessert while watching some late-night television.
PERTIMBANGAN PENCIPTA 
ljack_ace
ljack_ace Of course, I want Anna to have her good moment.
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