I went out of my cab and stared blankly at the colossal hunk of mess standing before me as I heard the vehicle slowly speed away into the road.
Alas, after the talk I had with Veronica and after convincing myself that there is absolutely no reason for me to refuse her offer. Thus, here I am now standing outside of the mall that I had thought I would never visit again—Plural Heights, dilapidated, grease-filled, and empty. I hurriedly went towards the entrance of the mall, but my steps halted when I had seen the 7-11 standing right in front of the mall. I then felt a lump swelling up my throat when I saw the bench where I first saw Mike after a very long time. I remembered how he disappeared one day, came back into my life just as suddenly, and instantly left without even an ounce of goodbye.
It felt like he entered and left my life all for the reason that I would never be able to understand ever in my life. Death truly is such a delightful little concept that could make a person realize how small he was in comparison to how vast the world is; I am just as insignificant as Mike at the end of the day no matter what I would do now and tomorrow.
So fuck it!
When Veronica invited me to come to a Plural Heights seminar in this stupid mall, I didn't even know why I hesitated to come. What else do I have to lose; why else am I overthinking the many decisions I make in my life when I will just end up as another decaying body inside of a coffin six feet under anyway?
And so I stood in front of the mall. Veronica gave me a piece of paper last night, and she told me that if I ever wanted to go to Plural Heights, I have to show that piece of paper to everyone I will meet in that mall, so they would know that I am a part of their tribe. However, I was still scared—scared that maybe what happened last time will reoccur. Yet, oddly enough, the seething loneliness within me activated some kind of nihilistic thoughts within my head, and it gave me a new-found strength that I would never be able to find anywhere if I hadn't accepted the futility of life. I'm going to die someday anyway, and if I ought to die in the hands of those groto freaks, then I might as well accept it as nothing but my fate!
I held the piece of paper gently as I walked towards the entrance. There I noticed that the three cargo trucks I saw back then were still standing there a few feet away from the mall's main entrance. However, this time, all of them are locked, making it impossible for me to see what that strange thing I had seen from within these giant husks of metal before.
I then pushed the mall's glass door open and was once again baffled by the absence of security personnel inside of the mall, not even anyone who's just sleeping there while wearing a security guard's uniform. I already expected this empty scenery since I had been here once, but I was still just as disappointed.
Amid my recollection of how much I hated this small, I started walking towards my destination nonetheless. Last night, when Veronica visited, she has instructed me to find the groto is the first floor of the mall, which kinda made me think that maybe there's more in the other levels, but I was too broken at the time to speak let alone ask a question.
After walking with a still-beating heart with fear grasping my body tightly, I started to move my feet towards that stone groto oddly standing in the middle of a fucking mall's hallway. Since I only went here once, I am quite uncertain where it was. At this time, I already thought that I might get lost for a bit if I don't remember where I had accidentally seen that groto. However, when I suddenly heard the sound of a bunch of people whispering among one another loudly in unison, I knew then that the direction where those voices were coming from is where I'm supposed to be.
I then saw a bunch of people gathering around a stone groto in the middle of the mall's hallway—precisely the same way I remembered how it was. Still, the only difference is that these people are wearing a different uniform this time: white polo shirt, denim jeans, black shoes.
"H-hey!" I said lightly, trying to get their attention with the piece of paper that Veronica had given me last night in my hands. "H-hey, y'all!"
One after another, the people standing around the groto suddenly turned their bodies towards my trembling self while mumbling to the people around them. All of their brows were furrowed unnaturally like they were deliberately trying their hardest to make themselves appear uglier than what they might typically look like. They're gnashing their teeth like a carnivorous predator, ready to hunt for the next blood they would stock into their empty stomachs. The way they breathe made me know there and then that they must be trying their very hardest not to lunge at me with all the weight of their bodies.
One of them who's standing closest to me suddenly uttered with the mocking voice of a furious psychopath, "He's a non-member! HE'S A NON-MEMBER!"
The rest of the other people also started shouting and riling themselves up as they all pointed at me with aggression and malice that I thought I would only be able to see in hell. They were already walking towards me with their vindictive gazes as I tried my hardest to find a source of bravery in me to speak.
"Veronica sent me!" Those three words are the only things I could utter as loudly as I could, for the beating of my heart prevents me from further saying anything more. As I said so, I extended my hand towards them while showing the piece of paper that I'm holding tightly. Oddly enough, the paper doesn't seem like it's crumpling at all, weird.
Nonetheless, the angry mob that's about to tear my body under different manners of torturous death finally stopped their angry shouting and menacing approaching with a look of shock plastered on their faces.
"It's a recommendation." One of them said with their mouth agape as if they had seen the unthinkable.
"... from Mother." Another one of them uttered after the other one as if to finish his compatriot's sentence. Just like everyone else, he looked so comically disturbed that his spit is already drooling out of his dropped mouth.
Their faces then suddenly started beaming with such warm and joyful smiles spreading out of their now fresh-looking faces devoid of their previous antagonistic attitude. They all started approaching me kindly with polite words and greetings that I could only hear from the best people in the world. Most of them even asked me for a hug while some started tapping my shoulders or shaking my hand. They all now looked like angels coming from high above, and the only thing missing from them now are halos and pairs of wings.
"You must have been highly favored by Mother!" A middle-aged woman uttered with a tear rolling on her cheeks.
"All of us wanted to have a better spirit, but your soul must be made out of gemstones and gold." A girl said with a twinkle in her eyes while standing before me, trying her hardest to get my attention.
"You are an amazing person. I'm sure you would love your stay here!" A man that's probably around my age uttered with her hands crossed.
"Young people these days truly are splendid. Just looking at you is enough for me to know that I can never compete!" An elderly man uttered while massaging his back.
Everyone around me was beaming with so much excitement and a pure form of anticipation that I would never have thought I would see from any stranger in my lifetime. However, from a distance away from the people who decided to surround me and me, some people just sort of stood there with a blank look on their faces, looking at the ceiling or the floor with drool spilling out of their faces. Everyone who didn't decide to come and approach me all just looks like they lacked sleep or something because they all seemed very pale and out of this world. Maybe they're having a bad trip? Hangover might be a reason too. I ain't stressing though; they look like they're just vibin' for real.
"Come, come, Mother is about to arrive! We're here to witness the time she gets here!" A plump lady uttered with her hands around my waist as she pulled me towards the groto.
I now stood a few inches away from the bullet-shaped stone platform erected in the middle of the mall's hallway. Now that I have seen it from up close, I could see that below it is made of the same stone used in the groto itself while the tiles of the mall surround it. None of the people around me seem to be standing on the concrete where the groto stood; they're all standing on the tiled ground. I then chuckled awkwardly amid all the sudden attention I'm getting.
"Is it really okay for me to have this kind of attention?" I said jokingly with a half-smile, but I know deep down inside of me that this is how I truly feel.
"Of course!" The plump lady who escorted me towards the groto replied with such profound confidence that it made me feel like what I had just asked was stupid. "We are all a family here, after all! And everyone in this family will get the love they deserve!"
"That's right!" Another plump man said on my left side with his first raised into the air. "But you have the Mother's recommendation! That means you're much more of a family member than the rest of us here in the family!"
"Brother, you are definitely right!" A teenage girl uttered with a playful chuckle, making the plump man grin while nodding with his eyes closed. "You are a part of the family, but all of us here who are children of the Mother must treat you with high regard because you're more family than a normal family!"
"Family is family, but you're a more family kinda guy, so we're more than willing to treat you as a higher family!" Another girl who's standing farther away from me at the back of the gathering uttered and the rest of the people around me started nodding as if it was common knowledge for them to speak such meaningless compliments.
I was about to ask them what their words meant and maybe have them speak to me a bit normally when suddenly, the plump lady—the person who escorted me towards the groto—who's standing behind me, screamed with delight as a huge grin started to creep up on her wrinkled face.
"The Mother's message is here!"
I then looked up at the groto after seeing that plump lady pointing at it. The rest of the people around me started to either exclaim with excited voices or weep a few tears of joy.
But amid all that, I was just left wondering why there are gradually glowing words emerging from within the empty space inside of the stone groto.
"MOTHER HAS ARRIVED!" it says, glowing haughtily while the rest of the people around me cheered, jumped in anticipation, or hugged each other with delight.
Having people tell you that you are a part of their family is always such an enigmatic feeling. Was I supposed to be happy now that I have reached a threshold in our relationship where I am finally unable to make love with you? Oh, the many worries I have in me are all too unnecessary!
Either way, the people who uses the label of being a part of a family as a way to make someone feel safe before making them do a decision they would regret are truly unremarkable.
Would I call them evil? Most definitely.