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MoonlightBomber
male LV 4An indie game developer and writer. Has a fondness for RPGs and visual novels. Also a collector of stuff. Support me on Ko-fi: https://ko-fi.com/moonlightbomber
2022-03-12 Joint Philippines
So, my initial impressions. The setting is good, the characters are good, but the beginning needs to have a little more punch. I can understand you employing the third-person perspective to narrate what is going on, but if you want to get your readers hooked more, the opening need to have this "personal touch", And finally, you need to fix the synopsis. Just tell who are the main players and what they are playing, and not just cut and paste an excerpt.
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Isekai. A dumb protagonist, who hopefully will wise up. A system of cultivation in place. Overall, this makes for a slow burn in terms of pacing, but I expect the developments, character-wise and plot-wise, to become better and better.
As I'm a straight guy and not a fan of BL by default, I am normally not interested in this. But in the first chapter, I can see the establishment of the pairing right off the bat, and while it's predictable, this bodes well for the rest of the story.
Right off the bat, we see clear POVs from the two main characters. This way, we readers can clearly see their thoughts ad motivations that will eventually tie them together.
While there are some tiny, tiny nitpicks I can spot, this novel is off to a great start. Great use of the first-person POV that truly defines the MC's personality.
A strong start, and an intricately-designed system that is not designed to be too cryptic. The way Japan is portrayed is also good enough as a fan of Japanese media myself. Will look forward to what happens next.
This novel has a strong and comprehensible beginning, with the protagonist's motivation for his adventure already set up in just two chapters. Hope this keeps up.
The first four chapters should clue you in to a straightforward yet strong start. We get the in medias res beginning of how a teacher ended up with a vampire, and how the story's immediate world is plagued by ghouls. I also can appreciate the use of the present tense in narration, and the presentation and flow are well-written and easy to understand. I can't wait to know what happens next.
So far, after reading 300+ chapters, I give my take. The characters are good, the worldbuilding is good, and the lovemaking scenes can be pretty hot. The only faults I can find are Lawrend being kind of a dolt at times and Humility's... uh... quirks.
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original Synchronicity: We and Her
Terminé
It all started with an accident that fortunately didn’t take a life. Frederick Keith Nighy and Leigh Ann Kimble, more popularly known as the country singer duo Brave Ad 65, rescue a girl named Aurora Hart from being hit by a truck. Since then, the couple takes care of her, treating her as their equal. And no sooner does the couple turn into a throuple – and the singer duo consequently turns into a trio – as Aurora becomes enamored with them both. But in order for the three’s voices and hearts to synchronize with one another, they must first conquer their own pasts. [Note] If you want to support the author, please buy him a Ko-fi: https://ko-fi.com/moonlightbomber257 Chs 307 Collections
- original
The Daig'digaia Saga: Fifty Adventurers Come Together!
Terminé
Experience a classic JRPG-style adventure like no other, 20 years in the making! Benoit Valmonte, a young Seattleite hoping to make it big in the game industry, purchases a game he has never seen nor heard of before. And once he plays “The Legend of Daig'digaia”, the game in question, he is sucked into another world – specifically, the world of the game itself. His mission is simple: Find fifty adventurers who are coincidentally his classmates, and fight the ultimate threat alongside them. And thus, he can go home safely. But there's more to this mission that he must find out for himself... [Note] If you want to support the author, please buy him a Ko-fi: https://ko-fi.com/moonlightbomber240 Chs 48 Collections
It's how everything is perceived in this post-truth era.
He thought about all the posts he saw on various forums and social media and how chaotic they were. It was a sea of constant bickering. No one accepted any source as reliable anymore, yet few were willing to do any verification themselves. It was as if humanity was stuck in a limbo state, seeing more and more information but refusing to evaluate what was true and false anymore. Instead, everybody stuck to their prior beliefs as a default because it was easier. In the end, this only created greater tension and divided the populace further than ever before.
My Pick Up Artist System
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