This is not to demean you author or your work. Just take it as a constructive feedback. English and grammar needs some work updates are excellent but slightly longer chapters would be better. maybe make a patreon to fund your work story dev is shaky, anything happens anytime.There is no smooth flow.sit down, plan your story arcs better so that they interconnect characters the girls are good, how did you fck up the mc? he is very narcissistic and sometimes brainless. He has a system, he should be more confident, calm and composed and not like a teenager. Ruthless he is , i like that but others need to be improved upon World background is not explained properly. At least a map where the size of his current kingdom compared to overall world size or maybe a floating continent of light years in size. Also the mage tiers are very weird. Maybe you should rethink the tiers and also the power gaps between each tiers. If you improve on these points, i will give you a solid 5 star. You can ask me for some inputs if you need, i will be happy to help cause i am a sucker for incest fantasy op mc novels.
keep going.EPic story. Just you need a editor . although your storytelling will get better the more you write, but i suggest you read some standard english books too to improve it faster.
you are not using your brain. death point is just misspelled by author, he means academy credits. He is not buying it from system, his system is not a super mall system. he is buying that potion with the credits the demoness sent him 100k.it further mentions that on black market it is even costly than on academy page. Don't make novice mistakes in reading guys.
On the black market, a bottle of Atomic serum could easily cost 100,000 death points. So, it was much more expensive than buying it from the academy's page.
I Regenerate 10,000 Times Faster
Fantasy · RagingArtPunk
absolutely amazing, excellent sex scenes, excellent system and op powerups. What I feel like is it is too rushed. You have an excellent idea, excellent characters but everything is too rushed. Think for sometime, get an editor also and then re do this novel. it holds an immense potential. Maybe add fantasy elements to it, even the pregnancy without getting fcked can be explained in fantasy genre. Just came accross this and dont want you to remain without reviews. Best of luck brother.
the only reason electro lost is cause of nonsense plot. Otherwise he can just fry spiderman in 1 sec.
shove thermodynamics up ur ass. Science doesn't hold in a fictional reality
Adams laughed, a sound of pure exhilaration. "This is incredible! This means I have infinite energy like that guy... what was his name again? Yes, Noah Osmont! And I have an infinite lifespan, meaning I can live forever, right?"
The Omnipotent System
Fantasy · Adams2004
why would you care what an ant does with a jelly bean?
The little girl shook her head, then she waved her hand, and a portal opened again. They then walked into the portal, but the young girl turned to Zhang Fei for a moment, as she inwardly muttered. 'I hope you are a good man and make good use of my gift, little boy.'
Zhang Fei - The Abandoned Son
Eastern · JosieGan
its not chinese format, chinese format are kill and be supreme, not be a beta japanese brainless idiotic cuck all the time. This mc is the later one if you havent noticed.
why would you want the rules and morality in an extraordinary world where death is just around the corner to be similar to a pathetic normal law bound world where we live?
"The final gain is so great. It was worth it!" Teresa consoled herself. Even though she would rather die than let a man touch her lightly on a normal day. Now, Teresa brought up some examples from her memory to convince herself—
Awakening：The Infinite Evolution of My Talent as a Low-Level Awakener
Fantasy · Whisk92
done
I AM A MAGE BUT WITH MILF SYSTEM
Fantasy · author_210