Chapitre 37: Not Weak

They both spoke normally for the rest of the trek. They walked across tattered streets that were bricked together with stone and cobble, giving in a sort of ethereal beauty. The unfinished look about it was sort of reassuring. It was created in this way, in which imperfections somewhat perfected the bricklayer's artwork. As they tread down the street, Nate, noticing random elements of beauty would point them out and describe them to Lucus. As he talked, Lucus was glad it was night. Even if it was a full moon, as Nate had pointed out, the darkness could still hide the hint of solemnness in his eyes. He pulled down at his bangs, pushing them in front of his greyish green eyes. Sadness often tugged at Lucus heart in a sense of longing for what he knew he could never have. No matter how well anyone could explain something, he could never truly understand or picture it in his head. What's the point in calling something bright or beautiful, when you don't even know what those words mean. They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder, yet what can you do if your eyes are incapable of collecting said beauty. Pangs of jealousy echoed about Lucus's mind on occasion. Jealousy that only brought guilt. The inability to enjoy Nate's precious efforts could only bring him down. No matter how much he tried to hide his discomfort, Lucus's stature still slumped forward a little, as if hands were grazing the ground. Nate glanced over, but didn't say anything. Instead they changed the subject. However, it wasn't long before they were met once more with the hospital's cold embrace.

The receptionist was the same lady as before, letting Lucus and Nate pass through easily. She seemed to have no concept of what time it was, and how it could affect her decisions to let children enter. Nor did she seem to hear or acknowledge the clacking of shoes on cold tile slowly distancing themselves from her. Up the smoothly running elevator and down a few halls. Lucus didn't need to ask for directions this time. He paused directly in front of Allicia's door, taking a breath before going in.

"You really are in love, aren't you." Nate whispered chuckling at Lucus running his hands through his hair anxiously.

"Shut up." Lucus quipped. He reached for the door handle, striding in with perfect posture, Nate close behind. The room was just as Lucus had remembered in the way sharp footsteps echoed around the room quietly, muffled by the curtains around Allicia's bed. She was still sleeping, and she hadn't seemed to have woken up. The only sounds other than that of the two guests, were the steady beep of monitors showing safety. Her breathing was soft, and sounded at peace. A good dreamless slumber. A sleep without dreams would always be better than one containing nightmares of trauma unknown. Allicia had multiple needles and tubes pricked into her, all organized and connected to a new instrument. They sat down where Lucus and Ben had last night, and Nate began to drum his fingers on a wooden side table. He bounced his leg in an impatient way, however his face didn't reflect any emotions.

"Soooooooo," Nate started, talking in a voice that practically touched the ground. "What were you planning on doing once you got here? Was she supposed to be awake?" Lucus didn't answer for a bit, thinking of a good answer. There really wasn't anything Lucus had planned to do. He just wanted to feel of some help, and to be there for her. His mind flashed to the screams and shouts of Allicia, crying out for some sort of help. He shut his eyes tight, before opening them and replying.

"I, I'm not sure. I never thought we would get this far. I just." Lucus clenched his fists tightly, whitening his knuckles. "I hated feeling useless back at the orphanage. I hated the feeling, no, knowing, I couldn't do anything for her. That I couldn't help her." Maybe the night was engineered to be filled with long pauses, because Nate too, took a few seconds to think before answering. None paid any mind to these waits, it seemed like a good time and place to hold patience in high.

"She's not a child. She's not weak either. From what I hear," He nudged Lucus. "She's really strong. She doesn't need you to protect her from anything. You can't fight her battles for her. She'll never overcome them if you do. Just, be there for her. Okay?" Nate got up and stretched loudly, shrugging off his recent wisdom. "I'ma go run over to the store and grab a snack. Found some change in my pocket and the vending machine. Want something small?" He was already leaving by the time Lucus declined.

The convenience store was well air conditioned, but rather cramped. It was entirely normal with nothing to set it apart from any other. Nate pulled his hood over his head, something felt sort of ominous about it. He looked at the cashier. He was entirely basic. Slightly greasy uniform and a name tag that was slipping out of its holder. The man was about twenty to thirty but looked much older from wrinkles of stress. The uniform was much too big and baggy and obviously tugged on a lot. Perhaps to look better for a few pretty girls, rather than an old slob buying his fourth sandwich of the day. Nate made his way down the aisle to the chip section. He selected a medium sized pouch, and snatched it off after checking the price. It was a little crushed, as it was the last one. Nate scoffed at it as he felt around realizing this. The leftovers. He kept it regardless, and continued over to the cashier. He was half asleep. Nate hurriedly checked out and then left. A small, mindless interaction. He stretched and yawned, holding a flimsy plastic bag with the one bag of chips in his right hand. He lifted up one foot to take a step out, when a rough, cold hand placed itself on Nate's shoulder.