"A bit late, I see!"
The king greeted me when he saw me walking in, and I quickly halted my walk and bowed slightly at him.
"Then, we may begin. Butler?"
"Yes, your highness.
The date is October 24th. The ceremony to award the greatest hero of Ardjestyn, the Paladin Hero, will begin."
The butler announced, and so everyone's attention turned to him. Except… for mine.
Earlier, Gilbert did mention that other important people will be here for the rewarding ceremony. As I look around, I can tell that he is correct.
The pope is here, and he is only aided by one man behind him. The king and his entire family, as always. And finally, the people on the right.
Gilbert, the knight commander in charge of all things ethelen as well as secretly being a Rank 7 hero Thunder Lion. He had a huge bandage on his right cheek, and I can guess where that wound came from. Next to him is the vice general knight of Ardjestyn.
But next to the vice general, is the face of a man I have not seen for a long time.
My father.
My attention was turned completely at him, not minding anything at all. He also noticed me staring at him, and he stared back at me.
Our eyes locked, but what I did not expect was his expression.
He wasn't smiling.
"Hero Rake…? Hellooo, are you there?"
I didn't even realize it, probably because I was staring at my father so intensely. But the king is apparently already right in front of me.
He walked all the way down the stairs himself and arrived right in front of me, and yet I ignored him because I was busy looking at my father.
"Y-Yes, your majesty! Forgive me for dozing off…"
"No, no, it's fine! I see you and your father have not met for a long time. You two might have a lot to catch up on after this, so let's finish this as quickly as possible, 'kay?"
"Yes, your highness."
I gulped down my saliva, imagining the things that is going to happen.
Catching up with father… I wonder what he is going to say to me.
"Perfect! Now then, raise your head…"
I slowly raised my head, and my eyes were locked with the king. He took out an item in his hand, and he spoke loudly.
"Sir Rake Ignicius. The Great Paladin Hero…
At the age of only fifteen, did you became one of the greatest heroes of Ardjestyn. It felt like it was only yesterday… you were so little too. But you have proven to everybody else that age were merely a number. I absolutely love that.
And recently, you led a team and took down a monster that has been a lingering pain to us humans. The Legendary One-eyed dragon, Calibra. It was a holy mission that I had never guessed had been possible… and yet, you've proven otherwise.
And once again, you've proven how stupid I am. Another holy mission, just for you to solve. An impossible mission that should've been impossible to complete. For everybody else, they might think that this mission is a suicide, so stupid to even complete… But you have… you've…"
All of the sudden, the king began to grow teary.
His act obviously made everyone panic, because the king should never show weakness like this in front of anyone. But in front of me, he cried.
"You have fulfilled… the wish of the people that has been going on for generations. You!! Who are still eighteen years old!! How diabolical is that!?
With that said… it is only fair for the kingdom to reward you. It is only fair for you to feel rewarded by the people, and so… the rewarding.
I, King Petridius Ardjestyn the third, hereby awarding the title 'Holy Knight' to the strongest human of all… Rake Ignicius."
A Holy Knight?
"The title 'Holy Knight' shall have the same respect and power as the rank 'Grand Duke'. The title 'Holy Knight' will only be given to the strongest, most highly respected individual in the kingdom, second only to the king."
Second only… to the king?
"The title 'Holy Knight' will have a position in the military much higher than the kingdom's Knight General."
A position… higher than father in the military?
"The title 'Holy Knight' shall also have a position in the church, much higher than the Pope."
Higher than the pope…? In the church?
"And finally… You may say any wish that you want."
The king finally halted his speech about the Holy Knight title, and asked me about my reward.
A wish, to be realized.
"Speak, Holy Knight Rake. What is it in this world, from the Ardjestyn people, that you truly wished would happen?"
My… wish?
What is it… that I wished for?
Was it to have a title, much higher than anybody else? Was it to help people, to make sure they never suffered? Or…
Was it for my own father… to look at me in the eyes?
What is it that I truly wanted?
…
In the end… what I truly wanted is…
"Can you… turn back time…?"
.
.
.
The rewarding ceremony ended with a blast.
The hero Rake Ignicius was given the highest title that a king can give, the Holy Knight title that has the same power as an Arch-Duke, that has the military power higher than the general, that has the position higher than the Pope in the church.
But, that title was immediately rejected.
The ceremony then ended with nothing out of the ordinary coming out of it. Everyone entered the room and exited with the same title and power, nothing was changed.
The only thing that changed was their expressions.
Disappointment, confusion, bewilderment.
Seeing the greatest hero rejecting a title much higher than anything else confuses everybody. The king himself stood up and gave him that title right in front of his face, and yet he rejected, also right in front of his face. The king is obviously not the only person disappointed. Everyone who was in the room was just as confused.
After exiting the room, the General knight immediately walked towards the exit. He safely arrived back at the knights headquarters, and he immediately arrived at his own living quarters…
Only to find a presence inside his room.
The Grand Duke opened the door, and found his own son standing in the middle of the room, waiting for him.
He stepped a few steps into the room, and he stopped once he was only six meters away from me. The two of us glared sharply at one another, turning the air incredibly tense.
After a long silence, I finally gathered enough courage to speak.
"Father…"
The words came out of my mouth so nonchalantly, and I coughed to clear my throat.
"Father. It has been a long time since we saw each other--"
"What is it that you wished for?"
He suddenly spoke, cutting my words completely. I turned my gaze back to his eyes, and found the genuinely angry eyes of a man I call father.
"W-What I wished for… Right. What I truly wished for…
All I wanted… was for you, for us to… see each other more often. I grew up, I'm eighteen now. And I barely see my own father in my daily life… I wanted to find you more in the house, it feels lonely and suffocating in that cramped space of a mansion.
You… are all I wished for… why is it that you can't be there for me…?"
I said while slightly shedding tears and staring down. I am too ashamed to even look him in the eyes, and everything just came out from my mouth so disgustingly.
I waited for his response for a long while, until finally I gathered enough courage again to look at his eyes--
He is… crying.
But at the same time, he is…
Incredibly rageful.
"How…? How can the world be so cruel…?"
He mumbled while being heavily welled up in tears. His face looked so angry, that I realize now that his tears were never because of sadness.
It was because of rage.
"How can the world bestow me with such a cursed child…?"
How…?
How can…
Such a c--
Cursed child…?
"Do you even realize… How big of a sin that you just committed…?
And you did it… because it was for me…?"
D-Did--
Th-This--
Sin…?
The old man then realized that he was crying, and he quickly turned his eyes away from me. He continuously strengthened his fist from anger, and he began biting his lips.
Why is he… being like this?
What did I do, to make him so angry at me?
Why did he hate me? All I'm doing is do my best to get him to see me, so why is he hating me?
Why…?
I wiped the tears off my face, and I began walking forward. I walked right past him, and I exited through the door in silence.
I left the knights headquarters, and this time I decided to just sit down on the rooftop of a building.
As I stared into the bright city of Ardjestyn, my mind once again wandered around all over the place. The deepest darkest part of my mind has been released, revealing me answers that I have been ignoring for a long time.
Father cries as he mentioned that I have committed a sin. He despised me, due to that sin.
But what sin is it? What is it that I have done to receive his hate?
It was at that moment, where my brain tried to find answers. The surface of my mind began to ask questions, the gears began to roll around trying to find that answer.
And after a while, the gears began to open the entrance to the depths. The revelation, only by the deepest part of the mind can answer. The very answer that has been kept very deep inside me.
The sin… Genocide.
In this world, there is no bigger sin than that.
In this lovely and beautiful world, no individual should've been allowed to exist with a sin like that.
In this disgusting and filthy world…
I… am the bearer of that sin.
.
"Khh!!!!--"
Once again, the darkest part of my mind has resurfaced.
.
"GhkkkkKKKKK!!!!!--"
Gradually destroying me, bit by bit.
.
All that hard work I have done… has been for nothing
"KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!--"…
.
.
And now… the only thing that I have…
"KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!--"
… is the insanity.