/ Anime & Comics / Star wars: New Order(DROPPED)
Synopsis
John was a normal person of society before he died protecting a homeless woman from being raped
And because of his act of heroism which changed the world, he was reincarnated to his favorite Series Star Wars.
The beginning of the story is a little disorganized and doesn't make sense but if you ignore that and keep reading it gets better
Also, this is my 2nd Book so don't expect much
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État de l’alimentation hebdomadaire
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56Critiques
4.19
- Qualité de l’écriture
- Stabilité des mises à jour
- Développement de l’histoire
- Conception des personnages
- Contexte du monde
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I think this story has potential however the grammatical errors make it hard to follow along and there are several plot points that i would change. also the story feels abit to fast pace even tho it doesn’t seem like its intended
The plot armor is on divine levels with this one. System points are always there a plenty, and your eyes will hurt from rolling them too much. The concept of the story isn't bad. It's rather interesting but it's the execution there of that did not go well. The dialogues are highly unrealistic and remind me of Sheldon in the big bang theory more often than not. Events that occur are even more unlikely. The character has absolutely no skill at resource management yet despite mere paragraphs earlier barely able to purchase something will suddenly be able to spend hundreds of thousands a few paragraphs later with thrice as much spare afterwards when nothing occurred to increase said valuta. The story is full of such things. Things like building a base that's finished in a day then leaving. 'Random' summons being the heroes of an entire franchise, and that's not even speaking about the 'Romantic' inclinations. Read it at your own risk...
I think this has a lot of potential. If the system could have a few more different technologies, it would bring it to a whole new level. I.E halo, titanfall etc.
The story is rushed. The charcters arent described. I dont know how the character or important female character look like after reading 4 chapters. The autor generally doesnt describes important things. For example he lets his soldiers mine some ore and crystal on tatooine without introducing the materials. There is an inconsistency in the numbers. His system points jump between one and one hundred million. His dialogue is very forced. The idea is good, but the story needs a clear plan and this story doesnt have this plan.
The guy gets a system, I don't think anything else needs to be said TBH... But I'll go on anyway, the system gives him gear (including a lightsaber) and access to ALL force abilities from the start. So there is no initial struggle for anything making it boring from the start. The system can summon what are essentially slaves for him that are loyal etc... So the MC doesn't have to be written with good social skills and doesn't need to have good qualities as his people will follow him anyway which will take any tension at all out of his future choices. If he wants something he just buys it from the system since it can sell him anything so the MC always gets what they need when they need it (another thing making it boring). There are other things but I don't think it's really necessary to mention them.
In my opinion the story feel rush by that just my opinion the character design is great but if you will please explain some of the back story of some of the character and character design is great my opinion take your time to describe the scene and the place.
I read the first chapter and got to the second chapter, until the goddess mentioned that he would get a system and give him anything he wants. Really thought it would be a decent Star wars ff, but sadly not, sigh......
latest chapter ruined the whole story. the new enemy chapter sees a random OC pop up for the first time, kill the Jedi council, brainwash mace, then kill Palpatine. this all in one chapter. No back story, no build up, just comes out of left field. horrible. Ruins the whole story in my opinion.
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This book will not be dropped unless I either am killed by truck-kun or Die from covid I have a big plan for this book but so you can expect maybe 60 chapters maybe more if I come up with something else
Feels a bit too OP right from the get go, the grammar isn't great and the reason for his reincarnation is one of those 'you did nothing yourself but that person you saved did, so here's a big unearned reward' novels, not feeling it, but probably a really good read for anyone feeling an OP MC.
I didn’t read a ton so this review won’t be too informative, but I’m dropping it so might as well. The story itself isn’t too bad, it’s mostly how bizarrely OP the mc is that irks me (along with some problems with the writing / grammar but not as bad since it’s edited now). After 2-3 chapters the MC already has the ability to use any force ability (with training for some), a completly loyal servant as strong as Yoda, and 9-10 completly loyal servants as strong as Mace Windu, and 20 normal soldiers. That’s only after a few chapters too (I think you’re underestimating Windus strength with having like 10 people on his lvl) But if you like over the top OP mc’s that likley wont struggle (or at least shouldn’t with all the MC has with his system and subordinates) then it could be worth a read for sure
Spoiler de révélation
I like this story ............................................................................././././././././././././././././././././././././././././././././././././././././././././././././././././././././
I like this story,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,...........................................................................................
🤔 let see hmm well some may say writing is awful but lets question it first 1. is the material has a cost ? , its free btw 2. should it be appreciated , i guess it should be for me that is ( effort and ideas of the writer)3. it isn't a racist or it includes racism in IRL so it still a good material for entertainment plus its free so i give it a 5 star ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ when you pay a book ofc you should criticize but since you didn't don't be silly and harshly criticize
This is a decent outline for a story. There is very little characterization and what little there is, is contradictory. Dialogue is stiff, impersonal, and scarce. There is little conflict beyond those scenes meant to demonstrate the MC's power and success. There is very little description of settings and imagery is non-existent. tldr; It's a story outline for a power fantasy set in StarWars.
Even though there are a few grammatical errors, I like it. This has potential.
The story has potential, but the writing quality really hampers the ability to enjoy it. The lack of commas, periods, and the size of the paragraphs can make it difficult to follow along.
HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM
These gotta be fake reviews man, grammar=trash, character development= trash, to get reincarnated he “saved” a homeless women from getting ra*ed dies there and the women plus child are there left with the guy who murdered him but instead of anything bad happening the child goes on to be a billionaire and saves everyone in the world. he gets a system and the starter pack made him a god