Chapitre 105: Chapter 105 - A Replacement's Insecurity
— Leon Greyrat —
With Nanahoshi and Rudy staying behind to learn summoning magic, and Zanoba taking the small vacation to deepen his research on the crafter of the automaton and the other works of art in the floating fortress, my family went back to Sharia the day after gaining Perugius' support with Ariel and I's causes, but not before having one final delicious meal in the fortress for breakfast.
And so, with us standing outside the house, and my Demon eye having thoroughly checked all the luggage for any rodents, we then went inside.
"Roxy! Kids! We're back!" I shouted, taking off my boots as the other three came in behind me.
"Ah… you're home sooner than I thought," Roxy said, emerging from the living room with a casual dress.
That looked nice on her… it may have been the week being spent missing her making me this way, but right now I wanted to carry her up to bed this instant.
I had to control myself.
"I would like to know how everything went, but first… welcome home," she said, opening her arms.
Yeah… I wanted to take her to bed really badly, but unfortunately, there were more important things to be done.
"Yeah, we're back," I said, hugging her and taking a whiff of her hair. "Was everything okay?"
"Yeah, no problems," she said, her voice muffled in my chest.
With me letting go of her slightly, I reached for her chin, tilting it up as we kissed.
And it was quite a passionate one indeed.
Even though it had been a week, Roxy seemed to have missed me quite a lot.
"What is it? Did you miss me that much?" I asked, my tone slightly teasing as we separated.
"Mmm. Well… that's part of it," she said, looking up at me, her eyes looking a bit guilty. "Just… I'm sorry."
"Huh? Why?" I asked, confused.
"Nothing, just… it's nothing," she said, shaking her head before kissing me again.
Well, that was a bit worrying, but I doubt that Roxy had anything to actually be sorry for.
Could it be?
Another child?
I know we had done it before we left, but I thought I used the contraceptive spell…
And besides, Roxy knows that giving me another child wouldn't be something to apologize for, so that couldn't be it.
Damn… okay, maybe I was a little worried.
"And… you three," Roxy said, looking past my side at Eris, Ariel, and Sylphy. "Do you mind coming to my room after dinner?"
"Hm? Yes, of course… but may we ask why?" Ariel asked.
"Just…" Roxy looked up at me briefly before turning away. "Just some girl talk."
Uhh… what the hell happened while I was gone?
— Roxy Greyrat —
"So? What's with this? Did something happen last week that you don't want Leon to know?" Eris asked, her eyes narrowing into slits as she tapped her foot against the ground. "Don't tell me you cheated or something…"
"What? No! Why would you think that?" I said, shaking my head.
Was I thought of as such a loose woman that I would do such a thing after a week without him?
Haa… seriously, Eris jumped to conclusions a bit too fast.
"Well… it is odd for you to be so adamant about not having Leon with us," Ariel said. "Unless… is this something concerning him?"
My lips thinning into a straight line, I slowly nodded my head.
Now… how would I explain this?
Well… I suppose there was nothing to explain, right?
I just had to show them.
"Well… I decided to do some cleaning while everyone was gone, since Leon usually took care of the dust with his wind magic," I explained, taking out the old book from my desk. "And in doing so, I may have taken a look at a… particular book that caught my interest."
"Caught your interest? What… was it his diary or something?" Sylphy asked, with Ariel's face gaining a bit of a blush.
Right… their relationship, as in Ariel and Leon's, was essentially started with him reading through her diary.
That fact had embarrassed the princess quite a bit after it came out, and was one of the first times I had seen her act so flustered.
But that wasn't important right now.
"Well… not exactly," I said, trying to find the right words. "Look, it's best if you just read it. You three… you've all noticed it, at least a bit, right?"
Sylphy tilted her head. "Noticed what?"
Right… noticed 'what' exactly…
I couldn't fault her for being confused.
Even I, from before, had ignorantly thought that the problems with the Man-God and Ariel's ascension were the thoughts plaguing his mind, making Leon so desperate and stressed.
But it seemed that I was wrong.
A useless wife… I was not.
No one could read minds, after all.
But still… I was a bit saddened that I wasn't able to help my beloved earlier, but I understand why he wouldn't want to talk about such a thing.
After all… who would want to explain to their wives that they had been with another man in a future where they didn't exist?
Now that I knew… I could at least help him now, even if it was later than I would have liked.
"Are you talking about his odd demeanour around you three?" Ariel asked.
Ah, ever the perceptive woman.
"Yes… it started a while ago. Right before Eris returned, if I remember correctly," I said, thrumming my fingers against the worn cover.
More than a year ago… that must have been when this had arrived.
I had discovered it two days ago, so I had lots of time to deliberate what was going on, and if the dates were correct… I believe that I had finally found a conclusion.
It also filled in many odd gaps that I had previously thought to be due to Leon's secrecy or overprotectiveness, mainly concerning the Man-God, Orsted, and how he became entangled with them, but now some things made sense.
"Anyway, I am certain that I have found the reason for it," I said, opening the diary on my desk. "It's this."
The three crowded over me, looking at it with confusion.
"I can't read it!" Eris said.
"Well, to be honest, that's not completely your fault. This handwriting isn't the best…" Sylphy said, narrowing her eyes. "And it is definitely not Leon's. If anything, it's…"
"His brother's," I finished for her. "This is Rudeus' diary. But… not the Rudeus that we know of."
"What does that mean?" Eris asked.
"Just… well, I guess for you, we'll read it, so just listen," I said, moving so Ariel and Sylphy could get a better angle.
"It's dated to over a year ago. At least for the first entry," Ariel said, tracing her finger down the page. "But why is this writing so messy?"
"That's just for the first page, don't worry," I said, flipping to the next one. "This one should be more legible."
Ariel and Sylphy nodded before continuing, but both simultaneously stopped as they read a certain line.
The exact same line that had initially caught my attention.
"'Lucie is getting bigger. She has a cute face, just like her mother. I wonder if she will grow into as much of a beauty as Sylphy has become'… What the hell is this?" Sylphy said, a bit of anger in her tone. "Is this some kind of joke? Who the hell is Lucie? And calling me a beauty? That… that's something Rudeus should be reserving for Sara!"
Ariel seemed to be taking this more rationally, as her gaze had narrowed toward the bottom of the page, though she was evidently still confused.
"If you must know, Lucie is your child… or at least, the one from another timeline… or perhaps another world," I explained. "And as for Rudeus… well, in this world, you are his Sara… just as I am."
It felt a bit distasteful to say, as well as incredibly confusing, but I needed to get through this.
I had already deliberated about this all alone, so these girls should at least share some of my suffering.
"I have a theory that I believe to be correct after reading through all of this… Do you remember Leon talking about a certain 'fate' when he explained everything about the Man-God to us?" I asked.
"Yes… I do remember something like that," Ariel said, Sylphy appearing to be too shocked by my words to speak while Eris was growling in anger.
Or perhaps it was confusion.
I didn't know.
"Well… that 'fate'… when he was referring to that, I believe it was actually about the things written here," I said, tapping the page. "I have gone through it, and everything concerning the Man-God aiming for our children, as well as our deaths… it is explained here."
Though I really was confused about one thing… where was Leon in this?
After how valiantly he saved me, and the love we shared afterwards, I knew that I couldn't be with another man, so something must have diverted from before the Begaritt Continent.
Actually, considering how I was already infatuated with him before then, I doubt that this 'Roxy' had encountered Leon at all.
And for him to not even be mentioned by Rudy, the brother he so admired as a child… Leon must have not arrived in Buena Village.
He was saved as a baby, right?
Perhaps… he was instead placed in an orphanage by Zenith in this timeline.
Or perhaps… something worse.
Either way, I didn't want to think about it.
I had wanted to put all of this out of my mind ever since I discovered it, but… I couldn't.
Not due to my curiosity, even though it was quite strong.
No… instead, I couldn't put it out of my mind because this was finally a way to fix whatever had been going on in my dear husband's head.
And I would need these three to help me do so.
And in order to do that… they would need to understand.
A feeling of insecurity and the feeling of being a replacement… I could empathize heavily with the first one, but as for the second… well, surely not many people had such feelings, or at least not with such a unique situation.
Getting through that would be tough, but at least I knew that the princess was smarter than I at such things. And not only that, she was also the only one where Leon didn't have these difficult feelings towards, seeing as this 'diary Rudeus' didn't have a connection with her unlike Sylphy, Eris, and I.
It… hurt a bit, to be one of the women causing him pain, even if I knew it wasn't my fault.
"Then… should we read through it?" Ariel asked.
"Yes… or at least the first few parts, as well as some later sections that I found important," I said, pointing to some bookmarks that I had placed. "But honestly… it should only take a few pages to understand enough. The latter parts aren't too important, save for some explanations of the past that he writes."
And with that, we began reading through it, with Ariel acting as the narrator for Eris, as Sylphy was still too stunned to speak clearly.
I would have done so myself, being the narrator that is, but… to be honest… some parts were painful.
My unborn child dying in my womb, later to be joined by me in the afterlife from petrification syndrome… the thought of not having an Aria or Leon with me in this world… I seemed happy, but… was I really?
And what answer did I want that to be?
Either way, there were also some private things that Ariel thankfully glossed over as she slowly went through the events, and by the end of it…
"Sylphy," Eris said calmly, though her fierce expression was nothing but. "Get Leon in here. Now."
"Y-Yes… I will," she said, her head hanging as she went out the door.
Yeah… hearing that everyone in this room had died, and under quite painful conditions at that… well, it had put a damper on the joyful mood that had been in the house previously after having heard of the success regarding Perugius.
And then there was that… man I had disgustingly called my husband in this world, as did Sylphy, while Eris was helplessly in love with him…
While I couldn't see Rudeus as anything more than a brother-in-law, or perhaps the cute kid I had taught back in Buena Village, I could at least attest that he was a good man and a good husband to Sara.
But this… this man was different.
He was vile, cruel, violent… all the things that would turn me away from romance.
Was he the man that this Roxy had fallen in love with?
No, probably not.
He had simply changed due to his experiences.
But either way, it left a bad taste in my mouth, and I'm sure it was the same for Sylphy and Eris, at least if their moods were anything to go by.
Feeling so bad about something that hadn't happened and a completely different set of events… well, hopefully, with this slight feeling of empathy, we would be able to help our husband through whatever he was feeling.
That was the bare minimum of a good wife's duties, after all.
— Leon Greyrat —
With Ars and Anna put to bed, and Aria happily playing with a couple of her dolls, I leaned back against the couch, my thoughts drifting to what my wives were doing at the moment.
Hmm… now that I thought about it, it could be something to do with taking the throne.
After all, publicly, once that happens, I'll be Ariel's husband, and she will be my first wife.
It wouldn't look good for the queen to not be the leading wife of her husband, after all, even if it was just on paper.
Besides, with how our lives would change as we moved to the royal palace… well, it must be about that, right?
Hearing the stairs creak, I looked over to watch as Sylphy marched towards me, her expression oddly stern.
"Uh, good evening? Did something-!"
I was interrupted as she quickly placed herself on my lap, capturing my lips in a deep kiss as her hands gripped the back of my head, her tongue assaulting me with a passion that was usually reserved for nighttime activities.
Enjoying the surprise, we exchanged kisses for a few more moments before she eventually separated, her face flushed and eyes firm in determination.
"Uhh… not that I minded that, but… what was that all about?" I asked after calming down from the attack.
Panting in order to regain her breath, Sylphy shook her head before she got off of me.
"Just… come with me. Please," she said, pulling me up to my feet. "And as for what that was… I was just marking my territory, and marking yours as well."
Umm… okay?
I was still a bit confused, but I guess it wasn't bad. And thankfully, it seemed that Aria was too engrossed in her playing to have noticed Sylphy's… forwardness.
With her dragging me up the stairs towards Roxy's room, as soon as she opened the door, I noticed that it wasn't only Sylphy acting odd.
"You four… what's this about?" I asked.
Roxy looked away, her expression apologetic before it changed to one of resolve, looking back into my eyes.
"I found it," she said, causing me to tilt my head in confusion.
Found what?
Unlike my brother, who had a prize from his and Sara's first time, I didn't have anything embarrassing like that to hide.
My question was then answered as Ariel moved slightly, revealing the old, dilapidated diary that was laid out on the desk, causing me to freeze.
"That… how did you get that?" I asked.
"I was cleaning, but that isn't important," Roxy said. "Leon… I should be asking you that. This is Rudeus' diary from another… world? Or another future… right? How did you obtain such a thing?"
She already knew that much… well, it was Roxy we were talking about here.
My Roxy… well, was that really the case?
Anyway…
"How much did you read?" I asked, looking at all of them.
"Those three only read enough to understand the basics. I, on the other hand, have read the entire thing," she said, narrowing her eyes. "So I'll ask again… how did you get this? I assume it has to do with the time magic that this guy discovered near the end."
I slowly nodded my head.
"Yes… and it appears that in that old guy's world… I wasn't in his life," I answered.
Roxy nodded. "I thought as much…"
Eris, who had been silently fuming near the wall, then walked over to the desk, and tossing the book into the air, she then unleashed a sword strike, dicing the diary into a flurry of paper scraps that helplessly drifted to the floor.
And for some reason… I couldn't find it in myself to stop her.
No… rather, I felt a small bit of relief.
"Disgusting… how dare you keep such a disgusting thing in my home, Leon," she spat, sheathing her sword as she walked up to me. "Tell me! You… you…!"
Her eyes shook, a look of uncertainty spread across her face. One that was quite foreign to the Eris I knew and loved.
"Eris… It's okay," Sylphy said, calming her as she patted her shoulder before she turned to me. "But Leon…"
With Sylphy seemingly having difficulty in finding the right words, Roxy stood up and walked over to me, stopping in front of me as she slowly reached out a hand to caress my cheek.
"Husband…" she said, the soft tone causing my heart to leap inside my chest. "I've noticed… we've noticed… that you've been different in the past year. I can only imagine ever since you discovered that diary. You… this made you worried about our love for you, didn't it?"
She had gotten it exactly right. And thus, I decided not to answer, instead averting my eyes away from her concerned expression.
But my not answering was an answer in itself, and as such, I quickly found my stomach struck by Eris' fist, causing some air to leave me mouth as I slightly stumbled back.
I didn't have my usual touki defences up, but still, for her to easily break through my reactionary enhancement… she must have been very mad.
"You fucking idiot, Leon! I knew you were sometimes stupid, but I never took you for an idiot!" she shouted, grabbing my collar and pulling me closer to her.
Despite how angry she sounded, while there was definitely some fury there, her face seemed more… worried and concerned.
Right… she cared about me way more than anyone would think, so for me to not believe that… it must have hurt her.
"Sorry," I said, hanging my head.
She shook her head in response.
"I don't need an apology! I need you to get it through your thick, stupid skull!" she said, pulling me into a fierce kiss as our teeth clicked together.
Ouch.
As we separated, her volume then quieted as she rested her head against my chest. "I… I love you, so… understand that… got it?"
Hearing such a sad tone, I felt my mood worsen.
Just mistake after mistake… maybe I should have given that diary to Orsted or Rudy as soon as I could.
Dammit, why did I have to be the one causing Eris to make such a sad face?
"Leon… you have to understand… those girls… they aren't us," Sylphy said, hugging my side. "And even if they were… considering what happened… and if you saved them… don't you think it's obvious who they would want to be with?"
Right… Oldeus was a big asshole, one that had separated himself from the people he loved to such an egregious extent, but still… it wasn't him that put me in this state of mind, but rather the him before his moral decline.
And more than that…
"I talked with him, you know… and there were quite a lot of similarities, between that Rudeus and I, especially concerning you three" I said, keeping my head down. "Saving Roxy in the teleportation labyrinth… having Sylphy as a childhood friend… being transported to the Demon Continent with Eri… it was all the same."
Clenching my fist, I released a sigh. One containing all the pent-up emotions I had been holding back.
Now that this had all come out… I might as well explain my deepest, ugliest fear as well, no?
Even if I knew that it sounded pathetic.
"So… when I think about it now… what if we're just a product of good timing. How much of it has to do with me?"
Looking back up, I saw that my three wives were all looking at me with a mix of shock, sadness, empathy… as well as anger.
Smack!
Surprisingly, it was Sylphy who attacked first.
Thinking about it now, even in our spars she had never landed a good strike, so this was probably the first time she had ever hit me with such power.
And while it was far weaker than anything I had faced against Eris in our morning spars… it hurt way more.
Smack!
Of course, Eris was next, delivering a slap to the opposite cheek with as much force as Sylphy.
And then lastly…
"Sorry, Leon… but you deserve this," Roxy said, apologizing before she also slapped me, though it was much gentler than the other two. "You… you don't get to say that. No, you don't even get to think that."
Well, that was a bit unfair, to control my thinking, but I suppose I couldn't complain.
"Listen, Leon. And listen closely," Roxy continued, raising a finger. "Those events… they might have helped move us along, sure… but we love you for you. I love you for you. I don't love you as the man who saved me from that labyrinth, I love you for you, Leon Greyrat. The one who treats me so gently, the one who cares for our daughter so dearly, the one who always gives me compliments… that is who I love. Not some hero born out of a childish fantasy of mine."
She then reached up to caress my face again, rubbing her thumb along my jaw as she continued.
"And if you still can't believe that… then you should know that I loved you before you saved me… even though I acted so embarrassing," she said, pouting a bit at the end. "Just don't tease me for that, understood?"
She was serious.
I nodded my head at the veiled threat.
"And I loved you long before the Demon Continent, idiot!" Eris added. "I didn't give a shit about the Demon Continent! I was happy back then that I could actually help you for once with your sisters, but it wasn't what made me love you!"
With Roxy releasing my face, Eris went up to kiss me, our lips crashing against each other once again.
"You… you don't get to stand there and tell me who I love. And I don't give a shit if another me loved someone else!" she said, grabbing my collar once again. "I love the man that cared about me when I had no one! The one that showed me the warmth of family! The one that understood me and dealt with me when I was an annoying brat! Do… do you think I needed the Demon Continent to fall in love with you for those reasons, you idiot!"
Well… no, I suppose she didn't.
With her releasing my shirt, it was then Sylphy's turn, her eyebrows curled down in a slight frown as she looked up at me.
"And as for me… saving me from those bullies and becoming my friend was something inevitable," she said, her expression changing into a slight smile. "After all, the man I loved wouldn't let a child get bullied, nor would he let her be lonely. And you loved my green hair, no?"
"Y-Yeah, I-"
"No talking," she interrupted me, placing her finger on my mouth to shush me.
With Ariel releasing a small snort of amusement, I shot her a small glare as Sylphy continued.
"Like those two, even if it did help, I don't love you simply because you were my childhood friend. I love you because you gave me hope when everything was scary. You gave me confidence when I lacked it, and you taught me so many things… you were so kind to me when no one else was…" she said, shaking her head with a smile. "And while I may not have fallen for you if we never met, I believe that is the case with every romance that has existed, no?"
That… last part was true, I guess.
"So perhaps, in some ways, our relationships are a product of circumstance… but that is simply in terms of us meeting. It was you who made us fall for you, you terrible, lustful man," she teased with a grin, gently pinching my cheek. "And if that is simply luck… then while you may be lucky to have us, then we are equally lucky to have you. It goes both ways, dear."
Her eyebrows then furrowed into a frown. "Or don't tell me… would you be with any girl that were in the same positions as us four?"
Ignoring the way my spine tingled at her calling me 'dear' with such affection, I slowly shook my head.
"No… I wouldn't," I replied.
"Hmm? See?" she said, smiling once again.
Yeah… just as usual, they were right… I guess.
I still couldn't completely shake the feeling of being an imposter, and perhaps it would never leave, but still… did this change anything?
I knew they loved me, and I had never once doubted it.
It was a complicated feeling, one that after ruminating over, boiled down to me needing to be the best, considering that it was me stealing another's fate in order to be with them.
And being the best husband surely wasn't a bad thing, no?
No… I don't think it was.
But maybe… I didn't need to try that hard to match up to another person who was lucky to have them… maybe I should try hard because these four deserved it… yeah, that sounded better.
And just like I had always thought… while I would be the best support for them… they were also the best support for me.
"Thank you… and I love you too," I said, leaning forward into Sylphy's hug.
"We know," she said, sifting her hand through my hair. "You've been keeping all of this to yourself, huh? And didn't we say no more secrets? You bad boy…"
Uhm… please don't say that, Sylphy.
This was not the time for my libido to spike.
"Yeah… so is this it?" Roxy said, joining the hug as she looked up at me. "Is there anything else you're hiding from us?"
I shook my head. "No… at least not that I remember."
Roxy stared into my eyes for a few seconds before nodding and cuddling into my chest.
Looking up at Eris, I saw that she was deliberating joining in, before finally resigning herself to hug me from behind, her breasts pushing dangerously against my back as she leaned her chin on my shoulder.
These three… well, even though I knew they loved me before then, hearing the reason for their affections had lifted an unknown weight from off my shoulders.
I really should do something to give back to them, huh?
"Yes, yes, now this is all truly lovely, but I believe there was something else we needed to discuss amongst us girls," Ariel said, smirking at the four of us. "Though… I guess we could do it now, considering the mood."
Wait… was she talking about that?
"Huh? What are you talking about?" Eris asked.
"Well… Leon was awfully helpful in gaining Lord Perugius' support, so I thought it was best to reward him," she said, slyly. "I know we've done things together through the night now and then… but never all at once, no? So perhaps we should change that."
The three girls surrounding me froze.
Oh dear Millis, she was talking about that.
"I'll go put that Aria to bed, so how about you four go to the room," she said, walking towards the door in a way that made my eyes glued to her bottom. "I know I won't be able to participate completely due to my condition, but… I can at least join in. And just watching would be quite the feast for the eyes~"
I swallowed down the saliva that had unconsciously pooled in my mouth.
"A-And what about Ars?" I asked.
"He can be alone for a few hours, no? Or… is that not long enough for you?" she said in a teasing tone.
And with that, she left, closing the door and leaving the four of us in our hug, with the atmosphere in the room having shifted from wholesome to awkward in an instant.
But, well… to be honest, I was getting a bit excited.
"Leon. It's pushing against me," Roxy said, impassively.
Perhaps I was a little too excited.
"You're really that eager for such a thing?" Sylphy said, raising a brow.
"Well… I mean…" I mumbled out.
They didn't want any more lies and secrets, right?
Didn't we just promise that?
"Hmph! To think you would be the most lustful one in your family!" Eris huffed, releasing me as she went over to the door. "Well? Come on, let's go!"
And with that, well… it was only obvious what happened later that night.
État de l’alimentation hebdomadaire
-- Classement
Power Stone 
-- Power
stone