Chapitre 6: ch 6
It was the morning of the Chūnin exams and a certain vampire was waiting patiently outside the ninja academy. He had been waiting since 8 o'clock, and had even decided to leave Victoria at home to keep Isaribi company.
Of course while he was waiting for his 'teammates' he managed to get a look at many of the genin participating in the exam, and was surprised to see a large number of participants from Iwa and Kumo. Although Naruto didn't read the minds of any of the participants, he did read those of their Jōnin-sensei's and quickly discovered that both Kages curious after hearing of the son of the Kiiroi Senkō(1) and sent participants to give them a valid reason for attending the finals, and if not, give their Jōnin a chance to evaluate the risk level of the boy.
He also realised that there were no Kiri genin, though given the civil war the country was in the middle of, it wasn't surprising.
"To kill or not to kill, that is the question… what to do, what to do… well killing spies is simple enough, just read the minds of all the Konoha genin and kill the ones who work for other countries… I can kill any Oto nin I come across, so that's good and all… but what about the rest? I know I promised the old man that I would only kill those that deserved to get mutilated, but I only gave examples of people who deserve to die… I guess I could use a coin to decide if a team deserves to die or not… yeah, heads they live, tails they die, yep, that sounds perfectly acceptable," the blond thought as a small smile tugged at his lips.
"NARUTO-BAKA! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING HERE!"
"To kill or not to kill," went through Naruto's mind again before he turned to the source of his irritation, "shut up Haruno, this exam has a little rule that states that it must be taken as a team, so if you want to enter this exam you NEED a third member in the team, and considering I'm the only available genin, you're stuck with me."
"PLEASE! SASUKE-KUN COULD KICK EVERYONE'S ASS!"
"I'd be more concerned about him trying to rape everyone's ass," the black clad genin muttered, earning him a death glare off said Uchiha and a pink haired fan-girl dreaming of being ass raped by the Uchiha. "Regardless, I would like to actually arrive to the exam on time, so shut up and walk!"
As the trio entered the second floor corridor, the first thing they noticed was a crowd of genin gathered around a classroom labelled 301, while two others were preventing anyone from entering.
Without so much as bothering to listen to the conversation, Naruto decided to add his two-cents.
"Drop the genjutsu and henge, pranking Chūnin wannabes trying to get to the exam isn't something respectable Chūnin like yourselves should do, Izumo, Kotetsu," the blond stated as he walked straight past the crowd, while a seething duckbutt genin and pink haired fangirl followed him, "exposing that genjutsu just increased the number of people to reach the first exam, so that should mean I have more potential playmates to kill."
When the group reached the stairwell, a sudden shout reached their ears.
"You with the dark eyes, you are Uchiha Sasuke are you not?"
Sasuke and Sakura turned to face the stranger who called out Sasuke, while Naruto ignored them and kept walking.
The person who called out, turned out to be a boy, about a year older than them with large, bushy eyebrows, a bowlcut hairstyle, large, round eyes and no nose. He was wearing a one piece, green spandex jumpsuit with orange leg warmers, blue ninja sandals, bandages covering his forearms all the way down to his knuckles and a Konoha hitae-ate as a belt.
"That's right, what is it to you?" the dark haired genin stated arrogantly.
"My name is Rock Lee, and I challenge you to a fight," the strange boy stated calmly, causing Naruto to freeze in his tracks.
"Hmm, go to the exam and wait for the retard to show up, or stay here and watch him get his ass kicked… I think I'll watch," the blond decided before turning around and forming a throne of darkness and eyes, while using the shikotsumyaku to complete the look of a demonic throne by adding bones to the mix.
Of course this attracted some attention.
"NARUTO-BAKA! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT… THING YOU'RE SITTING ON!"
"This Whoreuno, is called a chair," Naruto replied while making certain to draw out the last word of the sentence like you would when trying to get a four year old to understand, before he unsealed some popcorn he had packed just in case something like this happened.
"That is no way to speak to a lady, you are proving yourself quite unyouthful," the green clad individual stated with a frown on his face.
"There's a lady here?" the vampire asked with a single raised eyebrow, resulting in Lee spluttering about how someone as perfect as Sakura HAD to be a woman, while Sakura screeched out something indiscernible among all her screeching.
After several minutes of ranting, it was surprisingly Sasuke who ended the conflict, by starting another one.
"Hey, you said you wanted to fight me, then hurry up, I don't have all day."
With that one sentence said, the bowlcut boy took on a serious state, before proceeding to kick the arrogant 'avenger' around for a few minutes before it was interrupted by… a talking turtle.
Of course as soon as the fight was over, Naruto left towards the examination room, as such he didn't have to witness the evil that was the 'sunset genjutsu' when the boy's sensei showed up.
"I see that Sasuke and Sakura haven't shown up yet, shame I was expecting them to show up, even if Sakura is useless," a certain silver haired Jōnin stated calmly while leaning against a wall in front of the entrance to the first exam, "of course that also means you aren't allowed to participate either."
"Two things Hatake, one, the weaklings are both here and are merely being held up, two, I was offered the promotion without entering this exam, but I decided that it would be more beneficial to Konoha if the 'last' Uchiha participated," the young blond stated before leaning against the wall and waiting for the two stooges to show up, which they did after a couple of minutes.
"I'm glad to see you two show up, if one of you didn't then I wouldn't have been allowed to let you enter, anyway, I'd just like to wish you two good luck before the exam, ja ne," the Cyclops claimed before vanishing in a whirlwind of leaves, allowing the two newly arrived genin to see that their temporary teammate opening the door to the exam, before they decided to follow.
What they didn't expect was to find themselves frozen from the amount of KI being released at them by the rest of the candidates. However their fear didn't last long before a shout of 'Sasuke-kun!' broke them out of their stupor.
When Naruto had opened the door, he noticed the glares he was receiving from the other participants, but decided to let them be since they weren't doing anything more than release a miniscule amount of KI.
After leaning against a wall, he noticed his teammates walk in the room… and freeze? "To think that those weaklings would freeze at such an insignificant amount of KI," he thought with a frown, before closing his eyes and focusing on the thoughts of all the Konoha genin in the room.
"Sasuke-kun! Your late! I haven't seen you in a while, so I've been waiting in excitement," a certain platinum blonde shouted as she latched onto the boy's back.
"INO-PIG! GET YOUR HANDS OFF SASUKE-KUN!" the pink haired banshee screeched out, causing many of the participants to flinch at the volume.
"Why if it isn't Sakura… big ugly forehead as always," Ino replied casually resulting an indignant scream from said pinkette.
"You guys are taking this stupid test too? Don't die," a boy with hair tied up to look like a pineapple said as he walked over to them. He was wearing a simple mesh shirt with grey pants and an open grey jacket with green trim and the symbol of the Nara clan on it shoulders, while his hitae-ate was located on his left bicep. Naruto recognised him as Nara Shikamaru, the laziest person from his class at the academy.
Next to him was a… 'big boned' individual who was never seen without a bag of crisps in his hand. The boy had brown hair that was split into two main clumps, courtesy of his underwear shaped hitae-ate. He wore grey shorts, a white shirt with the symbol for the Akimichi clan sewed onto it, with a short sleeved green jacket covering it. He also wore a large white scarf and his arms and legs were covered with bandages. His name was Akimichi Chōji.
"Yahoo! Found you guys!" came the call of a boy with long messy black hair, a pair of triangular tattoos on his cheeks and a puppy resting on his head. He wore a dark grey hooded jacket, dull brown pants and his hitae-ate was located on his forehead. He was Inuzuka Kiba.
Behind him were a boy who was wearing a high collared, grey jacket, with brown, shin length pants and a pair of sunglasses covering his eyes, while his hitae-ate was located on his forehead. He was Aburame Shino.
Even further behind Kiba was a young girl with short, dark blue hair with two bangs framing her face and a pair of light lavender eyes. She was wearing a plain beige jacket and blue, shin length pants, with her hitae-ate located over her throat. She was Hyūga Hinata.
"Hey, where's the dobe?" Kiba asked as he looked around for the blonds trademark orange jumpsuit.
"He's right there Kiba," Ino said while pointing at the vampiric genin.
"Huh? What the hell? I thought you'd still be wearing that orange piece of shit, still a change in wardrobe doesn't mean a thing," the tattooed boy claimed.
"You seem confident Kiba," Sasuke stated.
"Yeah, we trained our asses off, we won't lose to you!" Kiba claimed, earning a snort of amusement from Naruto, "what was that for! Don't think we can win huh?!"
"That's not it, before arriving here, Sasuke got into a fight with last year's deadlast, and didn't land a single hit on him, so do you really think beating Sasuke would be that impressive?"
"SHUT UP NARUTO-BAKA! THAT GUY WAS LUCKY, SASUKE-KUN COULD KICK HIS ASS ANYDAY!"
"Hey, you guys should be quieter," a white haired boy wearing a pair of dark purple pants and a matching sleeveless vest with a short sleeved white shirt underneath. He also wore a large white clothe around his waist, a Konoha hitae-ate on his forehead and a small pair of round glasses, "you guys are rookies just out of the academy right? Screaming like school girls, this isn't a picnic you know."
"Who do you think you are?" Ino asked, slightly angered by the jibe.
"I'm Kabuto, but instead of that, look behind you," he stated.
When everyone except Naruto turned around, they met the glares of every other participant and the full force of their KI, causing all of them to grow nervous.
"Some of those guys have a real short temper, and making a scene is just going to make things more tense. Then again, you are clueless rookies, you remind me of how I used to be," Kabuto continued.
"Is this your second time Kabuto?" Sakura asked.
"Nope, it's my seventh, but that means that I have had seven tries to collect information concerning the exam itself and even some participants, I even have info on all of you," the white haired genin claimed as he pulled out a deck of cards, "I store it all on these nin-info cards."
"Do you have info on Rock Lee, Sabaku no Gaara and Uzumaki Naruto?" Sasuke asked.
"Aww you know their names, that takes the fun out of it," Kabuto stated as he pulled out three cards and added chakra to them, "let's see… Rock Lee, he's a year older than you, he's completed 20 D-ranks and 12 C-ranks, his sensei is Gai and his taijutsu has improved greatly this year, the rest is nothing impressive. He gained attention last year as a talented genin but didn't attend the Chūnin exams, so like you this is his first time attending. His teammates are Hyūga Neji and Ten Ten. Next is Sabaku no Gaara, 8 C-ranks and, wow a B-rank as a genin, since he's a newcomer from another country I don't know much about him, but he's apparently returned from every mission without a scratch," Kabuto claimed causing most of the genins eyes to go wide, "and lastly, Uzu… wait, it says here Namikaze Uzumaki Naruto, that's the same last name as the Yondaime, are you related to the Yondaime?" the white haired boy asked turning Naruto into the centre of attention.
"That man was my sperm donor," the blond stated evenly, shocking the rest of the rookies.
"Wow, so you're the son of the Yondaime, wow, anyway, it says here he has completed seven D-ranks, a B-rank and two A-ranks, wow that's impressive for a genin, as for skills, I've got nothing, except that he was removed from team 7 for undisclosed reasons, and is now under the care of one Mitarashi Anko."
"Hey Naruto, why were you removed from team 7?" Ino asked, curious about what sort of situation could result in someone being removed from a team.
"Um, oh, Hatake, Haruno and Uchiha attempted to murder me on our first mission outside Konoha," Naruto claimed, but before anyone could question him…
"AND YOU SHOULD'VE JUST DIED!" Sakura screamed out, shocking the other genin (except Sasuke).
"W-wait! You mean you did try to kill him!" Ino shouted in surprise.
"WHO CARES? THAT BAKA DESERVES TO DIE!"
"What about you Sasuke?" Shikamaru asked cautiously.
"He shouldn't try to be stronger than an Uchiha," the dark haired prick stated with a sneer.
Now, the sheer fact that the pair tried to justify the action, rather than deny it, changed the opinions of the rest of the rookies.
"… Anyway, you guys should know that the only village that isn't attending this Chūnin exam is Kiri, and that's only because of the civil war, even a new village called Oto is attending, but I wouldn't worry about them," Kabuto stated.
After hearing this comment, a team of Oto-nin got a little angry, and one of them decided to charge at Kabuto. Raising a large gauntlet, the Oto-nin swung at the Konoha genin that was already prepared to dodge, and landed a solid blow to the side of his head, sending Kabuto flying into a wall. As Kabuto got up while clutching his head in agony, almost everyone else was wondering what had happened.
"Huh? Why didn't Kabuto dodge? He looked ready to, so why'd he take the blow?" Kiba asked in confusion.
On the other side of the room, Rock Lee and his teammates Neji and Ten Ten where watching the exchange in curiosity.
Neji had long black hair, pale, pupiless eyes and was wearing a beige jacket and blue shorts, while his arms and legs were covered with bandages and his forehead was covered by his hitae-ate.
Ten Ten was a girl with brown hair that was tied into a pair of buns. She wore a pink Chinese style shirt and blue shin length pants with a large number of pockets littering it, she wore her hitae-ate on her forehead and had several scrolls visible.
Neji had decided to activate his doujutsu, the Byakugan, in order to analyse any techniques the Oto-nin used.
"Lee, Ten Ten, be careful of Namikaze," the pale eyed boy stated calmly.
"Huh? Why are you telling us to be careful of him?" Ten Ten asked in confusion.
"I only just saw it, but Kabuto would have dodged that Oto-nins attack… however, Namikaze pushed him into it," the Hyūga stated cautiously.
"Huh? Why would he hurt another Konoha genin? It is most unyouthful," Lee asked.
"I believe it is to do with the information he possesses, only the Hokage should have that information, as such it is highly likely that Kabuto is a spy and Namikaze is trying to eliminate him without implicating himself," Neji explained, "plus, that Oto-nin's attack should have killed Kabuto, however, Kabuto used a Jōnin level medical technique to save himself, which further indicates that he isn't who he claims to be."
"So if we meet Kabuto in the exam, should we try to defeat him?" the girl asked.
"No, we should avoid him if at all possible, there is no guarantee he is genin level, for all we know he could be as strong as Gai-sensei."
"What about Naruto?" Lee asked.
"We should try to avoid him if at all possible, he was even faster than Gai-sensei without his weights, fighting him would be stupid," Neji claimed, causing both his teammates to stare in shock, the mere fact that there was someone faster than the fastest Jōnin in Konoha, in the Chūnin exams was scary.
"THAT'S ENOUGH!" came a shout as a large number of Chūnin appeared with a Shunshin, while a large man with several deep scars littering his face appeared in front of them.
He wore a hitae-ate in the style of a bandana, a black shirt, black pants, black combat boots and a knee length black trench coat.
"Alright you little shits, I will have no fighting in this exam, anyone who disobeys that rule will be disqualified," the scarred man shouted, "now, each of you will be assigned a number, the number will determine the seat you sit in, now hurry up!"
It didn't take long for everyone to be assigned a number, and soon everyone was sitting in their assigned seat. Naruto found himself sitting in between Hinata and a shinobi from Kumo.
The Kumo-nin had dark skin and pitch black eyes, while his spiky white hair was held up by a Kumo hitae-ate. He wore a simple pair of black shinobi pants and a long sleeved black shirt, but the most prominent feature of his outfit was the single katana strapped to his back. He seemed very relaxed and was even sucking on a lollypop.
"Yo, names Omoi, nice to meet you," he said while holding his hand out in a friendly greeting.
"Naruto, likewise," the blond replied as he shook the strangers hand calmly.
"(sigh) I hate written exams, they don't actually test your abilities," Omoi claimed with a hint of irritation.
"But that doesn't mean you can't pass them," Naruto stated, having determined that the Kumo-nin was too confident to be incapable of answering the questions.
"Yeah, but anyone could pass a written test, a practical exam actually shows that you can use what you know."
"Heh, I know, but unfortunately Konoha is run by ninjas AND civilians, so written exams are common here," Naruto explained to the Kumo-nin, since it isn't exactly hard to come across that information.
"Damn, that's a pain."
"EVERYONE SHUT UP!" the proctor shouted causing every genin to stop talking, "I will be your proctor for this exam, my name is Morino Ibiki, now listen carefully because I will only explain the rules once and I won't answer any questions, now the rules, you have an hour to answer ten questions, the sheet in front of you has the first nine questions and the tenth will be given to you at the 45 minute mark, you start off with ten points, you lose points for several reasons, one, if you don't answer a question or get it wrong, you will lose one point, two, if you get caught cheating, you will lose two points. If you get caught cheating five times, you're entire team will be disqualified, the Chūnin here are going to observe you and if you cheat… they will know, if any member of a team scores 0 points, the entire team will be disqualified, now begin!"
"Pfft, an open invitation to cheat," Naruto muttered under his breath before reading the questions, "please… I have the knowledge of several Kages, this is piss easy for me."
After five minutes, Naruto had answered every question and turned his paper over… before putting his feet on his desk, tipping his fedora and pretending to sleep. In reality though, he was reading everyone's mind and picking out anyone aligned to Orochimaru or attending the exam as a spy.
He already knew that Kabuto was a spy for Orochimaru, and was just over Kakashi's level without his precious eye, that was why he stopped him from dodging the Oto genins attack, and even though his survival was annoying, it wasn't unexpected.
Of course, Naruto had originally planned on splitting from team 7 straight off the bat and going on a slaughterfest, but reading Kabuto's mind told him that Orochimaru was after the sharingan, so the blond would have to stick around the pricks until the snake made his move.
40 minutes later, we find Naruto in the exact same position, with Omoi assuming the same position after the 20 minute mark (except the hat). Several teams had been disqualified due to poor cheating, but the majority was still there.
"Stop writing, it is time for the tenth question!" Ibiki shouted causing everyone who hadn't finished to stop, "now the rules for the tenth question are different," it was at this point the catsuit genin from Suna appeared from a rather long toilet break, "Heh, good timing, was playing with your dolls beneficial? Now sit down, anyway, the new rules are the rules of desperation, the first rule is that you can choose to take it or not."
"What! And what if we choose not to take it?!" the blonde suna-nin asked.
"If you choose not to take it then, your points will be reduced to zero and you and your team will fail."
"What! Then of course we'll take it!" some random participants shouted out.
"And now for the second rule, if you choose to take it and answer incorrectly… you will lose the right to take the Chūnin selection exam ever again."
"So what? Chūnin are expected to risk their life on missions that don't have complete details, they don't always have the luxury of knowing what they are getting themselves into, if someone isn't even prepared to answer a single question, they don't have what it takes to be a Chūnin in the first place," Naruto stated loudly causing a look of realization to spread across everyone's faces, before settling into looks of determination.
"Alright then, who isn't prepared to take the tenth question?" Ibiki asked. After several minutes, no one had lost their composure and the room was still nearly full, "fine then… everyone who stayed, passes, you already know why because of that little bastard," the proctor stated while pointing at Naruto.
Just then, a large black bundle burst through one of the windows, before unwrapping to reveal a banner and a familiar woman 'the proctor of the second exam: the sexy and single Mitarashi Anko'.
"Bad timing Anko," Ibiki said calmly from behind the banner.
"Uh… I thought you would've at least asked the tenth question by now," Anko stated, clearly unimpressed.
"Actually, I have, but one particular genin gave the entire point of it away as soon as I said it, so no-one left."
"Well then, let's see, 123 participants left? Damn, anymore and there would have been too many for the second test," Anko mumbled to herself as she looked over the genin, before seeing Naruto, "I should've known you'd be here… I take it is was you who gave the game away right?"
"Naturally," came his unconcerned reply.
"Why are you so sure HE gave the game away?" the scarred Jōnin asked.
"(sigh) Because I doubt anyone else would try to increase the amount of competition in an exam."
"And why would he want more competition?"
"Ibiki, that kid makes me look haemophobic," she deadpanned, sowing confusion among the genin and shock through Ibiki and the Chūnin, "anyway little genin, follow me to the next exam!"
When everyone had arrived at the area of the next exam, many participants had a look of horror on their face at the ridiculously oversized foliage and the fence with countless warnings surrounding it.
"Welcome to the stage for the second exam, training ground 44, also known as 'the forest of death'," Anko stated when everyone had arrived, "you'll soon find out why it's called 'the forest of death"."
"Now before we start the second test, there is something I need to pass out," she continued while pulling out a stack of papers, "you must sign these waivers that clear me of any responsibility concerning your deaths, since people will die on this one," she claimed cheerily, "anyway, I'll explain the test, then you can sign the forms. You will be attempting to survive for five days inside the training ground 44. Each team will be given one of two scrolls, a heaven and an earth, your goal is to make it to the tower in the centre of the forest within five days and with both a heaven and earth scroll in your possession."
"Wait! What are we supposed to do for food?" Chōji asked nervously.
"Cannibalism isn't illegal you know," Naruto said calmly, causing several people to back away from him.
"He's right… anyway there are only three ways to get disqualified, one, you don't make it to the tower within the time limit, two, one of the members of your team is killed or three, you open the scroll."
"So can we sign these forms yet?" Naruto asked with a slight hint of irritation.
"Heh, yeah, you can now."
It didn't take long for all the forms to get handed in and exchanged, and soon every team was waiting by one of the entrances to the forest of death.
"Let's see, I'll have to wait for Orochimaru to show up first, after killing him I can then proceed to take out Kabuto and his team, before having my fun with the rest of the little genin, oh I can't wait to get my coin out, though I think I'll leave the rookies and Gai's team alone, oh and Omoi, he was okay," the blond vampire thought as everyone waited for the test to begin.
As soon as the clock struck twelve, the gates swung open with a cry of 'Hajime!' and all the assembled genin charged straight into the second exam.
(1) yellow flash
État de l’alimentation hebdomadaire
-- Classement
Power Stone 
-- Power
stone