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Chapter 61

AN: Woot woot! Another chapter so soon? My my...

So ya'll know that we have a discord right? Why am I telling you this? I'll get to, my useless point... So Discord has a bot where you can play, and I think I broke it for a while... I didn't know they could override by spamming ok?! And it's not like I was the only one spamming... But the majority of the spam did come from me, so I admit that I had a big part in it...

So, done with the IRL story, here's the promised chap.

~~

Same time as the bar scene

Rosalie's POV

I woke up from yet another dream, with my best friend as the main character... Or to be specific, with ROBIN being my partner in it.

I don't get why I keep getting these vivid dreams, most of them are sweet, with us flirting and acting sweet, like a wholesome couple, I could see her blush and in turn, she would also make me blush... I saw her confess to me... And... And then I saw us do That...

And tonight, unfortunately... Or fortunately? I had THAT as my dream...

I could feel my face heat up, as well as my whole body... The dream was so vivid and felt like it was an actual experience, that my body remembers how her touch made me feel, I could feel my core ruining my underwear... Begging for relief...

Why do I feel like this for my friend? Why now? ever since I visited her in her home to invite her to my wedding, something felt off... Like I'm missing something, when I saw her at my wedding, I was happy, but when I looked straight at the altar and saw my groom, I felt my heart break, but I pushed through, smiled, and pretended that nothing was wrong. But the feeling like I just betrayed someone very dear to me, to my soul... It never went away.

After the wedding, I tried to look for her everywhere, but she was nowhere to be found... Suddenly, I felt my heart go through strong emotions, I couldn't breathe, it hurt so much, and for some reason, I looked in a certain direction, which was towards the forest... And I thought of Robin... It kept going for a while, good thing I was alone, I hid myself in one of the empty rooms... The grief, sense of loss, heartbreak... All at the same time... I had to see her... I need to see her, but I can't leave my own wedding reception... I could just check on her tomorrow.

I went to her home but found it to be empty... I didn't get discouraged yet, and decided to go to Vera and inquire about the fake couple's whereabouts... she told me that she and Isaac dropped by to say goodbye and that they would be moving away for good.

I don't know why, but as soon as the fact that I would never see her again registered in my brain, my heart ached... It felt like I was being stabbed over and over. I CRIED and cried... I felt abandoned, but it felt more than that... Like I lost a part of me...

You might be asking why I would be visiting her the very next day after my wedding, and not be on my honeymoon... Well, you see, my husband is actually gay... Like Isaac, and we're just in a pretend marriage. We agreed to get married so we could be with the people we actually love.

Wait... Why did I agree to this? What was in it for me? Wasn't a normal loving family my dream? One that had a loving husband and kids... Which clearly, based on my °Husband's° sexuality, is not gonna happen, even if we set aside the fact that he's going to a war... What was it again... The agreement, why does it come off as a hazy memory when I try to remember it...

Ugh... There's that pain again... Ever since the wedding, I've been getting this pain in my chest every now and then... I had myself checked, but they found nothing... But it couldn't be nothing, because it keeps happening... I keep feeling loss, regret, heartbreak... And the weird thing about it is that it feels like it belongs to someone else like I'm feeling their pain.

I wanted to hate it, but when I thought about it, I kept thinking of Robin... It always comes back to her...

I started to feel like there was something wrong with my memories... I wanted to ask Vera, but I'm not sure if it was out of embarrassment or shame of the fact that by asking, I'm basically admitting to the fact that I had indecent thoughts and dreams towards our friend, towards another woman.

Which is also weird, because I accepted Isaac... And I accepted Robin... Wait... Robin is also °Gay°? How did I forget about that?

Suddenly I felt something loosen up in my head, and some memories became clear... About catching Robin with Claire, and realizing that she has been... To use Robin's own words... °Hooking up° with the ladies that consisted of her °Lady friends°... These memories irked me... Not because I feel disgusted by the same-sex pairing, but the fact that Robin... °MY° Robin was doing those harlots!!!

Wait... My? My Robin? Why do I care or mind if she's exchanging bodily fluids with some whore.

[AN: Oi.. That's not very feminist of you Rose, I'm trying to make you look good here, and you're not helping. Reign it in 😅]

Fine!!! Sorry... But anyone would get frustrated and mad if they knew and saw their significant other being intimate with someone who isn't you.

[AN: I noticed that you also have been breaking the 4th wall... Tsk you mates are killing me here😒]

Huh? Significant other? Why did I call Robin my significant other... Wait...The agreement...

Something broke in my mind and memories flooded back in... My whole relationship with Robin... So they weren't dreams, they were memories... Including THAT... I felt my face heat up again... But before I could process that, an unpleasant memory came in...

The one where I came to her home to invite her to my wedding, my decision to not tell her why I was doing it, in fear that she'd do something stupid, I was planning to tell her about it after... Apologize and get back together, and Isaac can be with my husband, like planned, but it didn't go as planned... Why did I even think it was a good thing to not tell her...

I remembered her broken state, her begging... But I kept going and until she finally gave up on me...

And then she spoke... I heard her voice, It was the most beautiful sound, divine... I would've enjoyed the memory of it, hadn't it been for the fact that I realize now that she lied to me about being mute, and the contents of her words to me...

And then the memory of her attending my wedding...

What have I done...

~~

AN: So this is more like reading Rosalie's diary, but nope. The next chaps will most likely be hers, or not, really depends on my mood. Buuuut hey!!! I managed to keep the word count to just a little over 1k, not including the AN at the beginning and end.

As always, thanks for the support... Donations, comments, and power stones, and being decent human beings.

So as mentioned, to remedy and give ya'll another way to donate, I made a Kofi account, but you can still use the PayPal account to send it directly, it's actually better if you do that, but if not, you can just donate through Kofi. But just to remind you, while I need and would actually appreciate it if you do donate since that'll help me with my irlrealtuation, you don't have to. My FF is free to read. Ok? You're not obligated to donate. I already appreciate you just joining my journey with the MC.(links👇)

https://ko-fi.com/emphie

https://www.paypal.me/EmphieIchini

If you have any song recommendations or any ideas that you think would be cool to see in the novel, share them on our Discord. You'll also get updates if there's going to be a change or delay in the chapters. Maybe you can even be in the novel yourself. Here's the invite: 👇

https://discord.com/invite/AYQr5Zhh


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