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24.24% Reincarnated as a Dwarf / Chapter 16: Ch. 15. Graduation and Meeting the Weapon Clan

Chapitre 16: Ch. 15. Graduation and Meeting the Weapon Clan

"Good morning, Kvalinn! Ready to graduate?" I was greeted way too early in the morning by Bekhi bursting into my room, and shining a light into my eyes with a rune powered flashlight.

I tried rolling over in my small bed, and covering my eyes with my blanket to go back to sleep until the waking hour. But all my efforts were in vain since Bekhi was determined to get me up.

"Com'n, Kvalinn! We have to get ready to see the Thane! If you get up now, I'll cook the side of bacon my dad brought down." I opened one eye, and immediately regretted giving her the flashlight. It was the first thing I made when I discovered the rune of light. It wasn't very good or efficient, since it lacked a light bulb and the mirror function was replaced by polished steel, but it was still brighter than the usual light source used down here. Normally to see around the house, we would just grab a piece of charcoal from the fire and put it in a little tray and walk with that. Candles were too expensive for us, and torches smelled foul in our small house.

"Bacon?" I mumbled out.

"Yes, bacon. All you have to do is wake up and help me get breakfast ready. I don't know where you and your dad keep all the pots and pans in the kitchen."

My mind began to slowly wake up, and lured out with promises of bacon, I started following her to the kitchen. As it continued to emerge from sleep, my mind started to wonder why Bekhi was in my house, but then I remembered that she and her dad had come over last night to continue marriage negotiations with my father and had offered to let them spend the night when the negotiations lasted longer than expected.

"Are marriage talks usually this hard?" I groggily asked Bekhi while getting out the single pot and pan we owned. "We were up well past the sleeping hour, and I'm honestly not sure if anything was decided."

"That's because you and your dad kept taking all the fun out of everything." Bekhi grumbled with a chuckle. "From what I've heard from my siblings, dad likes to bring up the points of negotiation in casual conversation and let everything be decided over a lot of beers. But last night, you and your dad kept hammering away at the points like you were at your forge, and all my dad's attempts to go over things in his usual way were smashed to pieces."

"Sorry about that. It's just that my father really hates the idea of me getting married and is still trying to decide whether to make things difficult, or get it over with as soon as possible."

"Wait, your dad still hasn't made up his mind on that?" Bekhi looked at me skeptically. "My dad brought it up nearly a year ago, shouldn't he have decided whether to say yes or no a while ago?"

"You would think so, but my father has spent the past few centuries avoiding marriage to focus on work, so arranging for me to get married is like drinking sour beer to him. Plus, me and my father have been arguing a lot lately."

"He still doesn't want you to go traveling the world, huh? Did you tell him that I'd be coming with you and would keep you safe." I gave Bekhi a side glare. Somehow in the past year, she had wormed her way into my plans to see the world. She pretended that it was just so that I would make her powerful weapons, but the real reason was that she wanted to keep me safe and out of trouble.

"Have you told your dad yet?" I asked pointedly.

"Told your dad what, Bekhi?" Dak appeared out of the darkness of the hallway, and entered the kitchen with a mischievous, but firm, grin. "That you would be spending some time with your mom and family before following Kvalinn into the world? I knew that already, and so does your mom. So don't even think of leaving before spending at least a few seasons at home."

"I know, Dad." Bekhi sighed with a smile.

"Would the guest room be available for those seasons?" Bekhi and Dak chuckled at my request.

"You'd have to do chores with everyone else, and making weapons won't count. But if you learn how to milk the cows and wield a hoe instead of a hammer, then I don't see why not." I gave myself a mental pat on the back for my little victory, I'd be able to prepare for my trip at the town smithy and then slip away to a human town without my father being able to stop me. Dak's next words though, stopped my celebrations dead in their tracks.

"I will not allow you to run away to a human town though." Dak gave me a more serious look. "Bekhi's letters mentioned that your father does not want you to wander the world like an exiled dwarf, and frankly, I agree with him. The surface world is a lot bigger than just Vesturhildrun, and there are much more dangerous monsters than snow wraiths and goblins out there, humans included."

Dejected by my plan being detected and foiled so quickly, I changed the subject and asked after Bekhi's family. Dak was just as susceptible to this tactic as Bekhi was, and soon he was talking at length about his new baby boy that had been born over the summer.

Eventually, my father woke up and came into the kitchen. Grumpily sniffing the air that was filled with the heavenly sound and smell of sizzling bacon, it was clear that he was irritated that the marriage talks were still ongoing.

"Greetings, Thane Thredak. May I ask why you are preparing breakfast when it is not yet time for the morning meal, and is barely past the waking hour?"

"Good morning, Ekgor." Dak returned my fathers surliness with a grin that is somehow unique to morning people. "Bekhi couldn't sleep since she was too excited about graduation, so she wanted to get a head start to the day."

Father just glared at Dak and Bekhi before turning his attention to me. "Do you have your presentation for the Thane prepared, Kvalinn?"

"Yes, father. Elder Thrikrondromm is keeping the weapon we worked on at school since its power and the materials used made it too powerful and valuable to be kept here, and Elder Voghigg will present the steam drill alongside me."

"Good." Father gave a sullen look at the atmosphere in the kitchen before exiting and growling over his shoulder. "I'll be working at the forge, do not disturb me until it is time for the morning meal."

After he had left, Bekhi looked at me questioningly. "Is your dad always like that at home?"

"Only when someone is disturbing his work or his routine." I responded with a shrug. "My father doesn't like to deal with people when he could be working. Speaking of work, here's the sword I promised you in exchange for the bacon."

Taking the runed sword from me, Dak gave his usual feral grin when he met a new weapon he liked. "Excellent work as always, Kvalinn. This will be perfect for little Vomnig when he gets a little older."

"Dad, remember what mom told you? No more weapons for us kids until we are at least ten years old. So you can't let Vomnig even touch it until then."

"Aww, but if I had followed that rule with you, then we wouldn't have realized how good you are with weapons and I wouldn't have enrolled you in school. Then you wouldn't have met Kvalinn and gotten so many powerful weapons." Dak teased his daughter with a smile, but like a human teenage girl, Bekhi wasn't having any of it, although the edges of her mouth struggled not to smile.

"True, but I'm the reason mom made that rule, she doesn't want you sending any more of my siblings down here. Not when there's so much farm work to get done." Bekhi took the last slice of bacon out of the pan and put it on a plate. "Alright, breakfast is ready. Let's eat and go get ready for graduation, Kvalinn. Dad, I'll see you at the great hall, right?"

"Wouldn't miss it for all the gold in the mountain, sweetie."

Bekhi and I quickly wolfed down our food and then started preparing for the graduation ceremony. Getting cleaned up and dressing up in our best clothes so that we wouldn't bring dishonor or shame to our clans when we met the Thane.

"People of Nurnwuhr." Thane Throdhengrun bellowed to the crowd. "My grandfather, Thane Vonur Craghand, set up the Vonur school of advanced learning after being inspired by tales from a summoned hero's world. Now, several centuries later, we are once again gathered here together to celebrate our youths who have benefited from the teaching and experience of our honored Elders. Elder Rongrim, call forth the first student worthy of receiving honor and praise from their Thane." Thane Throdhengrun was standing behind a large table in his great hall. He was around his late one hundreds, with a long black beard that only had a few gray hairs. This was the traditional gathering place for town meetings, feasts, and calls to arms. So this was where the graduation ceremony was being held.

All of the students were sitting with their families at tables that were below the dais where the Thane sat with all the Elders of the school. The procedure that had been explained to us on the last day of school was that Elder Rongrim would call up the students one by one, the teachers of the classes that the students attended would speak on their behalf, and then Thane Throdhengrun would congratulate them on passing. Only slightly different from an Earth school graduation.

As Thane Throdhengrun sat down in his chair that was larger and more elaborate than the others at the table, Elder Rongrim stood up to call the first student. "Kvalinn Ekgorsson. Step forward."

I was not expecting to be called first, but since Elder's and Thanes do not like to be kept waiting, I hastily made my way to the front of the room. Elder Rongrim then proceeded to give the reasons why he thought I should graduate.

"Thane Throdhengrun, Kvalinn has performed admirably in his studies. Passing not only my class, but excelling in Engineering class with Elder Voghigg, performing exceptionally in Advanced Combat with Elder Dworhick, and surviving Elder Thrikrondromm's training with minimal injuries." Elder Rongrim then turned to me. "Kvalinn Ekgorsson. Show us the proof of your skills, and justify your graduation from this school."

Elder Thrikrondromm nodded to some servants standing by a side door, and they wheeled in a large test dummy the size of a human. I had gone through a growth spurt over the past year, so I was now around four feet tall, but the dummy still towered over me by at least a foot and a half. Unclipping the weapon from my belt, I assumed the stance that had been beaten into me multiple times by Elder Dworhick and Bekhi.

The weapon that I had made for Elder Thrikrondromm's class was a two handed greataxe, and on that axe I had, with his instruction, inscribed a powerful rune of burning. Even now, with the rune inactive in my hands, you could see the air shimmer around the double sided blade as if it were on fire. Since the rune was made with the proper ingredients and forge song, the handle was cool to the touch, and didn't burn me like the warhammer I had used in the snow wraith attack.

With a single grunt of exertion, I swung the greataxe in a large arc and cut the test dummy in half. As the top half was falling to the ground, the rune proved its power by causing both halves of the dummy to burst into flames. It was ash before it even hit the floor.

A round of applause broke out, both from the Elders sitting next to the Thane, and also from the crowds of families and students. Our ancient dwarven heritage as weapon makers for the gods still ran strongly in our blood, causing even those in the Scholar Clan to appreciate an extremely well made weapon.

It was now Elder Voghigg's turn to nod at the servants. But instead of remaining seated at the table, he got up to join me where I was standing. The servants wheeled out a large stone block that was around three feet in each direction, and my steam drill. After my father's dismissive comments last year about how steam power would never be useful to the Weapon Clan, I had significantly altered the design of the drill.

The steam engine that would power the drills I strapped onto my back, where numerous layers of padding kept the boiling elements off me, and connected via tubes from the steam engine, were two hand held drills that started slowly spinning as the steam pressure built up.

"Thane Throdhengrun." Elder Voghigg started addressing both the Thane and the Elder's once he saw the steam pressure rising. "Kvalinn has managed to take my teachings, and turn the steam engine into both a tool and a weapon. Please observe."

Elder Voghigg nodded for me to start. So I squeezed the trigger to get the drills moving fast enough to cut through rock, and with both hands in front of me, I smashed the block of rock into small pieces. (Rock and stone!)

A collection of surprised gasps and murmurs broke out in the crowd, while Elder Grouznal of the Mining Clan stood up so fast his chair fell over.

"Outrageous!" Elder Grouznal slammed his hammer down on the table in rage as his face turned red in anger. "This beardless youth wishes to improve upon the sacred mining methods used without ceasing since Hjerouhrdinn Godforged sent his oldest son into the mountains to gather materials! Thane Throdhengrun, I ask that you immediately exile this impudent stripling from the city for this affront!"

Thane Throdhengrun looked concerned by what I had done, and what Elder Grouznal was saying, but he looked at Elder Voghigg questioningly with a raised eyebrow. "Elder Voghigg, you said that it could also be used as a weapon. But isn't this contemptible device merely a mining tool?"

"If you will wait a bit, you will see this device's usefulness as a weapon of war." Elder Voghigg waved forward another two servants who were holding a large shield between them. After giving me the signal, I revved up the drills again and it took less than a minute for me to break through the solid steel.

Thane Throdhengrun stood up from his chair, and after a few minutes of thought, he gave his judgment. "Kvalinn Ekgorsson. You have truly benefited from your years of learning under the Elders. For your accomplishments in rune crafting, I judge you as worthy of graduation from the Vonur school of advanced learning. May you bring much honor to your clan, and the Kingdom of Einangrad." He then brought down his hammer on a metal plate built into the table to signify that the matter was settled.

I returned the steam drills to the servants and went back to my seat. The steam drills had had a much less enthusiastic reception than I had hoped. I was expecting polite applause with a few questions, but having someone call for my exile over it?! That was definitely overkill.

"Congratulations, Kvalinn! That axe was awesome!" Bekhi greeted me with shining eyes and before she could ask her usual question about me making one for her, Dak cut her off.

"Well done, Kvalinn! Those steam drills were quite impressive. Could they be repurposed into a plowing tool? The farming clan would likely love to get their hands on something like that."

"Kvalinn." My father's stern voice cut me off before I could answer. "You have brought honor to the Weapon Clan today with your skills as a weapon crafter. Do not sully your reputation by crafting tools." Fathers stern eyes lighted up a little as he gave his own well wishes. "Well done in earning the praise of so many Elders. You have made me proud to be your father."

My father was a man who ladled compliments and praise with a teaspoon, so hearing him say that made me tear up a little. "Thank you, father. I will continue to do my best to bring honor to your teachings and the clan."

We were forced to sit in silence as Elder Rongrim called up student after student to list their accomplishments and allow them receive judgment from Thane Throdhengrun. The Elders had already filtered out anyone who was going to fail, so the decision was largely ceremonial, and it was mainly so that the Elders could show off what their students could do to the entire town. It may seem like a silly procedure to go through, but it was only after doing this for years that the town had started willingly sending their children to school, and the system had stuck.

"Bekhi Mubrimssdottir." Elder Rongrim called out. Bekhi made her way to the front, where Elder Rongrim described her talents. "Thane Throdhengrun. Bekhi has passed my classes with honor, and Elder Dworhick commends her as his finest student. According to his boasts, she would be able to take on a dragon single handedly and live through the attempt."

In order to demonstrate her skills, Elder Dworhick himself had a single combat duel with her in front of everyone. Of course, she fought with my weapons, and came within a hair of beating her opponent. Elder Dworhick only won due to his centuries of combat training and experience. Thane Throdhengrun praised her abilities, and said that he looked forward to the day when he summoned her to the throng to defend the mountain.

When Bekhi came back, Dak gave her an enthusiastic hug. "Splendid job, Beki! I'm so proud of you!" Since hugging, even handshakes, were looked down upon in dwarven society, Dak was immediately the center of a dozen angry glares from the surrounding families. But since that didn't affect him in the slightest, everyone moved to grumbling about the weirdness of surface dwarves.

"Sorry I couldn't do your weapons justice, Kvalinn." Bekhi said when she was released from the hug. "That last move by Elder Dworhick caught me by surprise."

"Nothing to apologize for, I could barely keep up with what you were doing." I thought back to the fight, and tried to figure out what had happened. But it all happened too fast for me to decipher, so I just shrugged it off.

"Elder Dworhick seems like a remarkable fighter. Do you think he'd take me on in a match after the ceremonies?" Dak grinned at Elder Dworhick, baring his teeth like he was a predator who had found a worthy opponent. Elder Dworhick must have sensed his gaze, and returned Dak's grin with one of his own. Bekhi and I both instinctively flinched since that smile was reserved for those who messed up and were about to receive a hellish training session.

We were asked to be quiet by a servant after that, so we spent the rest of the graduation ceremonies in silence, waiting for the last student to finish.

Eventually, the last student returned to their seat, and Thane Throdhengrun stood up to address the crowd.

"People of Nurnwuhr. Another generation has graduated from our school. Their abilities and knowledge now surpass their peers in the mountain. Their futures and honor shine brightly throughout the mountain. Let us continue to train our youth, so that the city of Nurnwuhr may be known throughout the dwarven world as a place of learning. Now bring out the food and let the beer flow!"

At the conclusion of the speech, there was a thunderous cheer, and servants emerged from a myriad of doors holding great trays of food and rolling out casks of beer. The food had been transported from human towns using runed containers to keep it from spoiling, and the Thane's cooks had cooked the meat in alcohol to give it more flavor and tenderize the meat. Making it a feast worthy of a Thane and one of the best I'd had so far in this world.

"Eat your fill today, because tomorrow we'll be making a journey." Father emptied his mug and called for a refill as Bekhi and I looked at him for more information. Dak, however, was the one who answered our unspoken questions.

"After you two left to get seats for us, Ekgor and I tried to resume the marriage negotiations, but that went about as well as tryin' to teach a goblin manners. So we'll be going to the Weapon Clan gathering in Midfjall to settle everything. It's only a day's fast walk from here so we'll be there and back before the year starts."

"Don't we need to prepare supplies? Join a merchant convoy? Hire guards?" I asked. Dak just shook his head in amusement.

"You only did that when you came to Vesturhildrun because the roads going there are largely untravelled and very dangerous. The road from here to Midfjall is much safer, and a lot shorter, just a bit steeper."

I mentally sighed in annoyance at the oddities of dwarven roads. Since we were underneath the mountain, roads didn't just go side to side across the map, they also went up and down with inclines as steep as forty degrees. So tomorrow would be a steep climb on a full stomach. I tossed back another beer to avoid thinking about it, and tried to enjoy the rest of the graduation feast.

"Never thought I'd be back here again." Father grumbled to himself as we emerged from the dark tunnels and looked at the city of Midfjall. "This way, the halls of the Weapon Clan are near the center of the city."

The trek to get her from Nurnwuhr had been steeper than I had ever expected, and my calves were screaming at me like I had spent the day running up stairs. I tried to avoid thinking about my sore muscles by taking in the sights.

Like any dwarven city, everything was made out of stone. From the buildings, to the streets, to the doorways, to the traffic signs, there wasn't a single thing that wasn't made of stone. The residents of the city were celebrating New Year's so there were a lot of crowds out on the streets, most of them drunken, and father with his dour face stuck out like a sore thumb.

"Is everything alright, Father?" I was concerned by my father's demeanor. His walk was somber, his eyes were listless, and his face looked as if he were biting a lemon and cutting onions at the same time.

"No! It's not!" Father barked out before taking a beer mug from a passing drunk and tossing it back in one go. Fortunately the drunken dwarf was too drunk to notice and the beer helped calm my father down. "We could be productively working in the forge right now, but instead, I am forced to come to my father for assistance in *gag* marriage talks. Seeing my father will be bad enough, but my brothers, cousins, and uncles are all people I've been avoiding for centuries due to their inability to focus on work, and their penchant for talk."

Seeing as my father worked from the moment he woke up to the moment he went to sleep, I guessed that the reality of the situation was that the dwarves of the Weapon Clan were much more social than my father. But since he was currently in the midst of an angry tirade, I chose to keep silent.

Eventually we reached the entrance of the clan hall, and we were stopped by two guards bearing mithril weapons that gleamed in the darkness. "Stop! Only members of the weapon clan and their guests may go beyond this- Ekgor? Ekgor Blazingbrand? Is that you?"

Father heaved a heavy sigh before replying. "Greetings, Uncle Khadurd. Is the clan head in today?"

"Your father is indeed here. You'll find him feasting in the main hall. Did you come to finally celebrate the New Years with us? Who are your guests? Apprentices that you wish to get the clan's approval to take on?" Father shot the guard a glare, and then glared at Dak and Bekhi before replying.

"This is Thane Thredak Fieryrage of Vesturhildrun, his daughter, Bekhi Mubrimssdottir, and my son, Kvalinn. Thane Thredak is here to discuss the marriage of his daughter to my son."

"Your son?" Khadurd looked between me and my father in disbelief. "You were only married around thirty winters ago, it should be another half century at least before your son would be ready to be wed."

"Normally you'd be right." Father grunted. "But Thane Thredak is a surface dwarf, and apparently they begin the discussion much earlier up there. Now are you going to let us in? Or are we going to stand here until our beards touch our toes?"

The guards looked at each other and shrugged. "I assume you remember your way to the main hall? Or do you need us to call a guide?"

"No need." Father gruffly walked past the guards. "I grew up here and unfortunately not even centuries of being away help me forget this place."

I quickly followed, nodding off an apology to the guards. Dak and Bekhi followed close behind me. Inside the clan halls, there were thousands of carvings of weapons lining every square inch of the walls, and there were dozens of stone statues of various sizes of people wielding weapons. It was in the main hall though that the true treasure trove of weapons was located.

The main hall was similar in layout to the Thane's hall where we had feasted yesterday, with long tables standing lengthwise to the room, and a raised dais with a sturdy perpendicular table where the Elder's and clan head were sitting and feasting. But what drew the eye were the weapons majestically displayed along the wall, underneath each one was a stone statue of its creator holding their smith hammer.

Each weapon varied in size, but also in state of repair. There was a warhammer that was larger than me, where the handle was bent and twisted. A sword where the blade was broken near the hilt, and the pieces laid out on a cloth. A dagger that was irretrievably embedded in a gigantic monster's skull. And many more. Even though each weapon was clearly unusable, and broken beyond repair, they still radiated power and destruction. It was a truly awe inspiring sight.

"Let this sight motivate you, Kvalinn." I looked over at my father. He had a nostalgic and reverent look in his eyes. "It has inspired us in the weapon clan to seek to perfect our craft for thousands of years. Having your work immortalized in the clan halls for all eternity is what every weaponsmith should strive for. But, no new weapons have been added to this collection since the last high king ruled the mountains, for none have performed deeds that are worthy enough."

After standing at the entrance long enough for it to be awkward, father shook off his reverie and began walking into the hall. "Let's get this over with." He muttered to himself as his brows furrowed darkly.

We walked down the rows of tables, and as we passed, several people began pointing and whispering about us. I couldn't make out what they were saying since Father was walking too quickly, but it didn't seem hostile or angry, just surprised. When we reached the end of the hall, father held out his hammer towards the dwarf in the biggest and most elaborate chair for the traditional greeting.

"Greetings, Father. May the ancestors grant that our meeting will be productive."

The clan head, otherwise known as my grandfather, finished off his mug of beer before looking closely at our group. I could see the resemblances to my father, the determined brown eyes, the strong nose, and the unbelievably muscled torso that only comes from centuries of working the forge. His beard, however, was several inches longer than my fathers, with white hair liberally streaking through the black and bejeweled braids.

"Greetings, Ekgor Blazingbrand. May the ancestors gant that this meeting is productive and that many more will follow." The greetings over, my grandfather looked curiously at his guests. "Who have you brought to join us in our celebration of the New Year? Knowing you, they are not friends from Nurnwuhr."

"You are correct, father." My father pointed at each of us in turn. "This is Thane Thredak Fieryrage of the surface town of Vesturhildrun. His daughter, Bekhi Mubrimssdottir. And my son, Kvalinn. Thane Thredak is here to negotiate marriage between his daughter and my son."

There was a sizable commotion as my fathers words made their way up and down the rows of tables. So far as I knew, it was an honor to marry the family of a Thane, even though the position was not hereditary, being close to the Thane meant being close to the King, and your actions would have greater weight in the eyes of the mountain.

My grandfather brought the commotion to an end by banging his hammer against the table. He then introduced himself to Dak. "Greetings, Thane Thredak. I am the clan head in Einangrad, Irgadhim Mithrilkeeper. May the ancestors witness the successful joining of our two families. However," grandfather looked skeptically between Bekhi and me. "It seems a century too soon to be deciding the fate of these children, is there a reason for this unseemly haste?"

Dak stepped forward, and spoke with the gravitas expected from a city leader. "Greetings, Irgadhim. According to the ancestral way, it would indeed be too early to decide anything. But life on the surface is much more difficult, and the amount of children born each year is a matter of survival for the town. So it has become the custom in Vesturhildrun to begin marriage talks early, and have the couple wed when they reach the age of maturity. Also, Kvalinn has performed actions of such note, that giving him the hand of my daughter is the only possible reward."

"We shall see." My grandfather then gazed at me with surprising intensity before holding out his hand. "I would like to see your work, Kvalinn. To find out what you are worth in the marriage negotiations."

I unclipped a one handed war axe that I had made recently. It was crafted solely with function in mind, so there were no fancy carvings or intricate designs or even magical runes. Just a plain and simple axe for killing random goblins. Grandfather inspected it as if it were a rare diamond though, giving it a much more thorough analysis than the Elders at school had ever done. After ten full minutes of silence from him, he handed the axe back.

"You craft as one with a much longer beard. Your father has taught you exceptionally well, Kvalinn." That was the dwarven way of saying that I was way better than I should be at my age. My heart leapt when I heard his praise, and I was glad that all my hard work wasn't for nothing. But due to the solemnity of the situation, I had to keep the grin off my face.

"Your praise honors me, grandfather. May the ancestors grant that I one day craft weapons at your level."

My grandfather looked appraisingly at me before nodding and turning to my father. "The hour is late, Ekgor, and you must be weary from your trip. Join the feast tonight, and tomorrow I will set aside rooms and have family assist with the negotiations." He then took a quaff of beer from his mug to indicate that the matter was settled, and servants escorted us to our seats before serving us beer and food.

"Don't drink too deeply, Kvalinn." Father put his hand over my mug before I could drink anything. "The beer served here is much stronger than what I keep at home, and we will be swarmed with family in a few minutes whose desire to scheme like elves is stronger than their skill with a hammer. So say as little as possible."

Father was right about being swarmed by relatives. The next several hours were spent meeting cousins, aunts, uncles, great aunts, great uncles, cousins who were once, twice, and even three times removed. Each of them gave a formal introduction and spoke with me on various topics. I wasn't sure why my father compared them to elves though, while it was true that they all tried to pump me for information, their attempts were so blatant and so poorly hidden that they would have been kicked out of a bad spy movie for horrible acting. So I was able to give token responses that sounded nice but meant nothing.

When the sleeping hour finally came, I went to bed with names and polite conversation swirling through my head, and I fell asleep before my head even touched the pillow.


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