Me and Rias made out a bit but before long we had to separate and go back down to my basement to get Ni and Li moved so when Sirzechs brought a whole damned farm/zoo they wouldn't get harassed by the animals or whatever.
A large Gremory magical circle formed in the middle of the large room and my eyes could only twitch as Sirzechs clad not in his Lucifer outfit or even something remotely formal or even causal was actually wearing a stereotypical farmer's outfit with overalls and an authentic straw hat on his head. And then there was the small stampede as like three dozen animals franticly ran away from Sirzechs and deeper into my workspace.
"Big brother..." Rias groaned as she facepalmed at the sight of her goofy brother who only burst into laughter at the sight of Rias moving to stand behind me so she could press her face into my back in hopes of this sight being merely a dream or something.
"Well, Jake I took off work. What was so important that you needed to show me so urgently?" Sirzechs bombastically asked and I wanted to retort how he actually took off from Grayfia hovering over him.
"Ahem, let me get a cow and I will show you." I coughed as I walked over to one of the more relaxed cows that weren't wide eyed and looking like they were a couple seconds from keeling over from stress.
I quickly used my pheromones to relax the cow as I calmed it down then I led it over to a stand where I could wrap it around its form to lift it off the ground slightly with magic. Wordlessly I kept the cow utterly blissed out on a chemical cocktail so it wouldn't freak out at being levitated and then I began the process of copying over the Phenex clans' regeneration to the milk creating ducts in the cow's teats.
"Rias please bring me a bucket." I called out and Rias all but bounced happily as she got me a bucket to put under the cow.
"Jake, can I milk it!? I had a petting zoo but none of the animals were cows that I could milk!" Rias asked excitedly and I threw Sirzechs a look that could only mean 'how spoiled is she?' but he only shrugged so I matched his motion with my own shrug.
"Yeah sure. I will help guide you." Granted I wasn't a farmer or anything in my previous life but having Fleshcrafting powers that literally let you see and control the process in which the milk got pulled out of the cow's teats made it the easiest chore in the world for Rias.
"So... Is this milk supposed to be super delicious or something?" Sirzechs asked with an upraised eyebrow and after a hum of thought I pulled open a cabinet and handed him a scalpel.
"Cut your finger or something and take a drink of the milk." I said in answer and Sirzechs gave me an even look before he looked to Rias who nodded looking excited as she already knew how important what I had done was.
Sirzechs shook his head and then took the scalpel and made a small cut on his finger and I saw a drop of blood well up on the finger and then he took the bucket and his face scrunch up at the raw untreated smell of the milk despite me stripping any harmful bacteria and stuff from it.
"You got a cup?" He asked wryly and Rias just stomped her feet.
"Big Brother just drink it and quit being a baby!" Rias scolded him and Sirzechs looked up to ceiling seemingly trying to find God but then realized he basically was the devil's god, so his dull eyes dropped back down to the milk and then he just lifted the bucket and started chugging the unpasteurized milk before slamming the empty bucket on the table and shuddering.
"Dude... You only needed a sip look at your finger." I said dumbfounded but still on Sirzechs finger was the prominent golden flames of the Phenex clan that preluded the Phenex flames regenerating his cut finger.
"You gave a simple black and white spotted cow one of the devil races most valuable bloodlines... I am lost Haha!" Sirzechs burst into laughter but then he abruptly stopped as he cupped his stomach. "Ah too much milk... Anyway, Jake what did you want me to do with these cows?" Sirzechs asked me.
I just shrugged. "I don't care honestly. I just wanted to snub my nose at the Phenex clan and if it helps you politically and you guys can sell the milk to the Sitri hospitals to bring the Sitri and Gremory families closer together that is perfect." I said as I held Rias's hand and Sirzechs eyes gleamed as he came to the conclusion that these cows were a sort of wedding gift or something as I was staking my claim on Rias.
Which wasn't wrong... Rias was mine and it was only a matter of time for us to seal the deal as it were. As it was plain to all that Rias was set on me.
"Hmm well as Rias's beloved older brother I thank you for the gift and know that not only the Gremory Family but also the Devil race thanks you for this." He said with his Lucifer Charisma coming to for and I couldn't see him as the goofy older brother of Rias as true power radiated from his frame.
"So, if I were to make all the fluids within the chickens, you brought me also Phenex tears so that way if you cook and eat them, they can still heal you. And in the middle of a fight, you just whip out a fried chicken drumstick and begin eating it and healing all your wounds instantly. How pissed do you think the Phenex clan would be?" I asked conspiratorially and Sirzechs face scrunched up as he held in mad cackles at the thought, but Rias however didn't have that self-control.
"Bwahaha! That will make Koneko cry in laughter as she always used to call Riser and Ravel Fried Chicken Haha!" Rias barely managed to explain as she choked back laughter, and the explanation finally broke her brother's composure as he himself burst into laughter making me also chuckle at the thought of Ravel pouting at the sight.
"Jake please just fix up the rest of the cows Haha... I can't stop laughing at the thought of those old crusty devils in the Devil King and Old Satan Faction throwing a fit at the realization that such a bloodline was given to a cow of all things and not a weaponized monster or something." Sirzechs said waving me off as I went to give the rest of the cows the bloodlines and also knock out the rest of the animals and put them in the stasis tanks that were mounted on the walls of the large room.
After I brought the Phenex clan cows to Sirzechs he just shook his head before abruptly breaking out into giggles and I then noticed why. All the cows regardless of if they were black and white spotted cows or even like Scottish highland cows with the super thick coats of fur all had small tufts of blond hair/fur on the tops of their heads...
"Jake clear your schedule tonight I think this is a wonderful excuse for you to meet the family. What do you say?" Sirzechs asked as he took the rope that bound all the cows together in a line and were behaving due to them frankly being high as hell.
I nodded but still looked to Rias who was holding my hand. "Rias you ok with that?"
Rias smiled and kissed me on my cheek making Sirzechs hiss and hold his chest in 'agony' at the sight. "Yes, I would enjoy that. Plus, Akeno has been wanting to talk to my mother anyway so she can come as well."
"Well in any case you two have fun. And Jake don't make a Godzilla or whatever and not tell me! I could use it for a villain on my Super Sentai show Haha!" Sirzechs laughed as he and the Phenex clan cows were all engulfed in a bright light as he teleported away obviously back to the underworld.
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