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37.83% Fate Altering System: I Can Alter Fate with Bullshit! / Chapter 14: The Village [3]

Chapitre 14: The Village [3]

Shik, in a fit of hysterically laughter, rolled across the air while punching down.

On the back ground, Kobi's enraged and incoherent curses gushed out like an endless stream while messing up with his tonsils and vomiting non-stop.

Yet... props to the man for still cursing the system admits the rainbows pouring down his mouth.

And Kobi... directed his eyes from himself to Shik.

Yep! He was staring at his own video.

Kobi took a deep breath, zipped his curses and threw them in the trash. From today, he's Saint Kobi!

Kobi flashed a magnimious smile and asked, "O, you son of a bitc-MAIDEN!" Kobi heaved a large breath before continuing, "So what did you actually feed me?"

Shik laughed a bit more before wiping his tears and smirking, "With respect say, please oh great system of even greater feats."

Kobi's smile brightened, "O dog-dopi system of even greater fart-feats." Kobi's breath quickened as he completed the whole thing in one breath, taking a moment to relax his nerves, he continued, "Ple-bitc-Please tell me what you fed me!"

"Pfft! Hahahaha!"

Looking at Kobi's tomato red face, Shik burst into laughter.

"Mending you into a better person will be a long and arduous journey but I shall certainly prevail!" Shik straightened his noble, blue and red theme, clothes and smiled at Kobi.

"The thing is, you missed the red line by a tiny, extremely minute gap, hence you received the pink reward, a vigour potion. It gives a boost to your regeneration for a while. Like your hand, see, it healed quickly after bending out of shape."

Kobi heaved a heavy breath, he could swear the needle was right on top of the red line but he didn't ask for justification, he feared he would die from anger if he realized... just how tiny that distance actually was.

He glanced back, he could hear light footsteps approaching.

On the walls, sillouthe of a very old person, with his back hunched like an old tree bark and supported by a staff drew near, his trembling hand was clenching the arm of a young boy. Besides them walked a rather tall girl- compared to the old man.

The curtain moved aside and the three stepped in, suddenly, the air turned strange.

"You! You... you were pretending to be injured? How dare you deceive me?" Reka pointed at his twisted face, her face going bright red from embarrassment and anger as she rememberer his earlier words.

"Hoho!?" The old man's droopy eyes widened as he gazed at the thin cloth covering Kobi's lower body and highlightening his curves, "T-Two!? How in the name of... haa!" The old man shook his head, "My eyes are getting old! I actually saw he had two!"

"Humph!" Rio snorted and looked away.

"Deception!? Humph! So what if I did!? You should be glad a handsome boy like me deceived you to entre your house! Heck, you are one to talk! Taking full advantage and having me stripped!" Kobi smirked and raised his chin, "You should pray ten times more today that I, myself in flesh, graced your lowly place!"

"You, you shameless, con-artist, scum! Humph!" Reka found herself at a loss of words and simply turned away her puffed up nose.

"Wha-What's this scent!?" Rio frowned and looked around... his eyes finding a large pile of rainbow near the wooden bed, he took a step back in apprehension and pointed towards him, "Yo-You! If you had to vomit you could've at least went to the cesspit! Must you taint our house?"

Reka's attention also got pulled by the rainbow... causing her mouth to hang loose for a while, "You! How dare you? Why are you doing all this!?"

"Huh!?" Kobi's face distorted, remembering the earlier embarrassment, he decided to let loose a bit freely here, "Vomit? The heck are you saying? I, myself, with my own mouth and some contribution to my stomach, worked together to repay you and you treat my gift like this? You ungrateful wench! You should kneel down and lick every last bit, savour every moment, and thank me for my generosity after every lick!"

Looking at Kobi's disdainful gaze, Reka could only do one thing, "The fuck?"

Rio's mouth hung loose, his finger trembled as he gazed at Kobi's arrogant expression and blurted out, "You lolicon!"

Kobi's expression darkened, "Fuck!"

"Alright, alright! That's enough mischief for today!" The old man laughed heartily and slammed his staff, shutting Kobi down.

"Oi, crooked tree! Who are you for me to listen to you, huh? Do you know who my Papa is? Do you know how beautiful my mother is? Do you know how majestic my sweat is?"

"Hahahaha! Nice lad, nice lad! Now why don't you have a chat with the owner of the land you stand upon?" The old man didn't take his words to heart.

"Huh!? This land?" Kobi's eyes flashed with surprise before he quickly took a bunch of contempt and stuffed his chest up, "Humph! So you don't know who my Papa is after all! He can buy you along with this land of yours! Forget you, what the heck is your twig self worth even? My Papa can buy your last seven dead ancestors! Wait... they would be all bones now... they wouldn't be worth much either... anyways! You understand who my Papa is now right? Good, now make me understand as well! My memory is too divine to understand such petty things so if you can prove your worth as a useless memory baggage, I might take you in as my boot-licker!"

The old man sweated heavily, 'Just what devil have I met?'

"Enough! You can't just insult our grandpa like this any further! If the other villagers come to know of this, they will hang you in broad day-light! Uncaring of who your Papa is!" Rio rebuked.

"Papa!? Shit! you already hinting such shit? Damn!" Kobi took a step back in amazement.

"..." Sensing the air had turn cold and stern, he realized he had overdone it again. With a dry cough, he began spreading his kindnss, "Sp-Speak old man! Feel blessed this young master shall pay your words a ear!"

Reka and Rio both glared at him. Rio stepped forward and retorted him, "Don't insult grandpa like this! I will not... I will call you lolicon!"

"R-Rio! Don't catch his dirty germs!" Reka squatted and patted his forehead, sending Kobi a glare.

Kobi whistled and looked away, he had no plans of apologizing, he didn't curse after all! He even felt a little smug about it! He sneakily gazed back at Shik in pride.

The latter directed a loathsome glare towards him.

"Ha-Haha! The young blood nowadays!" The old man shook his head and gazed at Kobi, "Young man, if you so care to tell, what were you doing near the boundary? From the fight our girl Reka described, you don't sound strong! So what were you doing near such a dangerous place?"

The old man hurriedly added, "Oh! Don't take it the wrong way! I, along with the others are extremely grateful for you protecting our little Reka and Rio."

"Humph! He's not worth it!" Reka scowled.

Kobi ignored her and answered the elder seriously, "I can't tell you the details, but realize from this that I have no clue where I am, what boundary or what danger you speak off and what not. I... I was teleported there against my will!"

Kobi didn't really mind telling him that he came from another world, but having read his fair share of fiction. He feared the people would mistake him for a messiah or a hero. Even though he might just have too... destroy this world one day.

The wrinkled eyes of the old man slowly rose up, "Young man... are you for real?"

He knew the boy had suffered real injuries because the blood on strewn bandages was still fresh. Hence he had silenced Reka from slandering him earlier.

And from his years of experience, he could tell the boy conceled mysteries and conspiracies. All being the reasons he kept laughing him off.

Kobi glanced at the old bones in the eyes and slowly nodded.

"Hmm!" The old man brushed his shriveled white bristled beard, "Young man, I shan't pester you needlessly then. But... you are free to stay as you like in this humble village if you see it fit for your luxury. And... young Reka can teach you a few in's and out's of your present location as well."

The wrinkled schemer didn't actually mean it. He had glanced at the clothes Reka had set out to dry earlier, he could guess the boy had come from a very high and noble background, the likes that would never sit here, where the people didn't even wash themselves completely after a dung or two.

He bet he would run away in half an hour as he stepped outside.

The wrinkled geezer was just trying not to get on his nerves or bad-side, even though he was highly doubtful of if he even had a good one.

"Huh!? Why me grandpa? Why even let him live here in the first place?" Reka questioned incredulously, Rio's eyes asking the same.

His wrinkles pushed back as he tried to smile, "Now, now girl! We ought to repay kindness!"

"Thank you, crooked tr- ahem! old bones! I will do just that!" Kobi smirked while gazing at Reka. Causing the later to frown and snort.

'Is that any better you spoiled brat?' The old man nodded his head joyfully. "I will be off than! Show the youngster around the village Reka, make sure to treat him well!"

The old man walked out, smashing his staff, he knew it was only a matter of hours, or even less before he heard a horrified scream as the youngster ran away.


L’AVIS DES CRÉATEURS
Nikola_Niko Nikola_Niko

This is the last time I am gonna write this message.

Everything in this novel is purely for comedic purposes, I mean no harm! I respect everyone, ignored cast, creed, religions and belief!

I hope everyone who feels offended simply leaves and let those who enjoy this kind of humor, like me, to get our daily doses! Thank you!

If you wish to curse me and the WN censorship is hindering you. You can curse me at discord( Holy Devilish Supreme#0355 )

Enjoy! And Peace!

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