"Make up your mind to do it, Kondo," Matsudaira sighed softly and said earnestly, "To be honest, this arranged marriage is actually a political marriage. The Planet Gorilla and Earth have repeatedly had diplomatic clashes. You were chosen to help resolve this situation."
"As the saying goes, an eye for an eye, use a gorilla to deal with a gorilla! Please do it, Kondo. The fate of the Earth rests on your shoulders. We reserved this fancy Japanese-style restaurant for this purpose. Make sure you woo the Princess!"
"Even if you say that..." Kondo said with a conflicted look on his face, "She is a gorilla."
"So didn't I tell you? You don't have to care too much about the photos." Matsudaira continued, "She must be a beauty three times more beautiful than you think. Trust me!"
Suddenly, Matsudaira stopped in front of a room, "Alright, we're here. Let's go in. Excuse me~."
As he spoke, Matsudaira pushed open the sliding door.
Kondo followed Matsudaira into the room. However, Kondo immediately saw the gorilla who would have an arranged marriage with him. He saw a huge gorilla sitting on the floor. Although it was sitting, the gorilla's head was almost reaching the ceiling. In other words, the gorilla's upper body was already close to three meters!
"A... A... A gorilla that is three times bigger than I imagined!" Kondo was so shocked that his tongue was tied.
However, at this moment, Kyubei led Otae to the door of the room where Kondo was. Otae inadvertently glanced at the huge gorilla.
"What's wrong? Otae?" Realizing that Otae had lost her composure, Kyubei asked with concern.
"Nothing, I just saw a huge gorilla," Otae replied.
"You're talking about some strange things again." Kyubei said, looking at Otae affectionately, "You're still so interesting, Otae."
...
In front of the restaurant.
"Have you all remembered? The key to the negotiation." Gintoki looked at Kawaki and the other two and said seriously.
"YES, SIR!" Kawaki and Kagura replied at the same time, while Shinpachi, who was at the side, still looked absent-minded, and no one paid any attention to him.
"Well, in short, that's it. Show your momentum! It's enough to let them know that we are not easy to provoke! Only when they realize this point can we put forward our own conditions! Remember it well!" After Gintoki nodded, he turned around and stepped into the restaurant.
What was worth mentioning was that both Kawaki and Yorozuya had changed into formal clothes.
...
"Hey, Kondo, I'll leave the rest to you." said Matsudaira while looking at Kondo, "I still have something to do. There's an idiot in Bakufu who wants to take money from Yoshiwara."
"Eh? What do you mean?" Kondo was puzzled.
"A certain Bakufu official wanted Yoshiwara to send him money in the name of taxes." Matsudaira puffed out cigarette smoke and continued to explain, "After that, he found me through my connections and hopes that I can get in touch with Yoshiwara's people to sound out."
"This kind of thing is too..."
"Ah, the so-called officialdom is like this," Matsudaira said disapprovingly, "I'm so scared. If those negotiators who came from Yoshiwara directly turned hostile on the negotiating table... I really can't imagine it..."
"Well, it's about time for Yoshiwara's representative to arrive." With that, Matsudaira turned and walked out of the room, "It's time for me to do my own things."
"Uncle!" Kondo still wanted to say something, but Matsudaira did not give him the chance. He left a firm shadow behind and directly closed the sliding door.
...
"Ah, this is the place they mentioned." Kawaki stood in front of a room and nodded. Then, he resolutely opened the door.
After Kawaki brought the Yorozuya trio into the room, he realized that the so-called negotiator on Bakufu's side was actually Matsudaira.
Kawaki, "..."
...
"Then, uncle, do you want to tax Yoshiwara?" Kawaki asked expressionlessly.
At this time, Kawaki and the Yorozuya trio were sitting opposite Matsudaira.
"How is that possible?" Matsudaira smoked a cigarette; his face was full of relief after surviving a disaster, "But speaking of which, I'm really glad. I didn't expect that Yoshiwara's negotiator would be you. I thought it would be some big shot. This old man's little heart is really beating fast."
"Well, I'll state it in advance..." Kawaki was interrupted by Matsudaira before he could finish speaking.
"I know. I will tell that person when I go back," Matsudaira continued, "I'll just say that Yoshiwara's attitude is very tough. There's nothing I can do about it."
"Ah, that's good." Kawaki said with a smile, "Well, it's best to add another word."
"What words?"
"I hope you can warn him not to stretch his claws randomly." Kawaki narrowed his eyes and smiled, "If there is a next time, I don't mind letting Hyakka go to his house."
Hearing this, Matsudaira sighed, "I understand. I will tell him your words. But to be honest, that person shouldn't have any more thoughts about touching Yoshiwara. Don't worry."
"If that's the case, that would be great." Kawaki stood up, "Well, that's it for today. If you have time, you can come to Yoshiwara to play."
"This old man can't stand Yoshiwara's tossing." Matsudaira also stood up, "After all, it's already tiring enough to deal with my wife at home every day. Recently, my wife has been complaining that my time with her has been getting shorter and shorter."
"There's nothing we can do about it. After all, we are already old." Gintoki dug his nose and said casually. Then, he looked at Kawaki, "Alright, the incident is over. Where's the reward?"
"Gin-san, you didn't do anything at all, did you?" Shinpachi said expressionlessly.
...
In another room.
"Well, does Princess Bubbles have any hobbies or interests?" Kondo asked with a reluctant smile as he knelt across from Princess Bubbles (The Princess of the Planet Gorilla).
"Uho."
"Oh, that. How nice that is. It's just like a Beep." Kondo's face was full of sweat, "But if you do that too much, your shoulders will hurt."
'I don't understand at all! I don't understand what she said at all! Come to think of it, can she understand what I said? Am I thinking too much? And she seems to be getting more and more unhappy. I can't see if she is really angry. It's over. If this continues, Earth will be in danger!'
'No, no, now should not be the time to think about this. Uncle should be in an extremely dangerous state right now. I should save uncle first! That's not right; the fate of uncle vs. the fate of the Earth, the latter should be the priority, right?'
'No, no, Kondo, how can you think that way? Uncle is your benefactor! Is Uncle's life really as important as the Earth?! Is it?! Ah, but if you compare it carefully, it should be... It's so difficult, what should I do... I'm so nervous; I want to poop...'
Kondo's mind was full of conflict. But in the end, Kondo made a decision in his heart, that was to save Uncle first, then go to the toilet to save himself, and then come back to save the Earth!
Then, Kondo stood up with his hands on his butt, walked to the door of the room, opened the door, turned his head, and then signaled with his thumb that he was going out, "Uho!"
Kondo meant: I will be back in ten minutes; please wait here for a while.
However, this became in Bubbles' ears: I like you very much, let's go, I'll show you something exciting!
Bubbles' face immediately turned red. To be precise, it was black and red. Then, Bubbles stood up awkwardly.
'What's going on?! Why is she blushing?' Kondo thought to himself, 'What exactly did she understand? Why is she standing up?'
"Uho!" Kondo spoke again.
What Kondo wanted to express was: Your Highness, just wait here.
However, in Bubbles' understanding, this sentence was: What are you dilly-dallying for?! I am already thirsty to the point of death!
Thus, Bubbles' face became even redder... and black.
...
'What's going on? Why did she follow me?' Kondo glanced at Bubbles, who was behind him, 'Why is she blushing? It looks super disgusting! Forget it; the most important thing now is to find uncle first.'
However, just as he reached the next corner, Kondo lost his composure. He saw Matsudaira, Kawaki, and Yorozuya trio standing in the courtyard while chatting and laughing. The atmosphere was extremely harmonious.
Kondo breathed a sigh of relief subconsciously, but it was with this breath that a door that Kondo had just held with all his strength opened...
"Ah, little uncle, Gin-chan, there are two gorillas-aru!" Kagura was the first to notice Kondo and Bubbles not far away.
"Two gorillas? What nonsense are you talking about..." Gintoki had a look of disapproval, but when Gintoki inadvertently glanced at Kondo, he suddenly became speechless, "It's really two gorillas."
"You're right." Kawaki and Shinpachi nodded at the same time.
"It's not bad for Kondo; it had developed to this stage in such a short period of time." Matsudaira nodded and praised, "You actually invited the Princess to take a walk in the courtyard. Do you want to increase feelings in this way? As expected of you."
'Uncle, please stop talking!' Kondo felt bitter and could not say anything, 'Don't let them know about this! If they knew, I would definitely be laughed at for a long time!'
Matsudaira seemed to have seen through Kondo's thoughts. He came in front of Kondo, patted him on the shoulder, and left after saying "good luck".
Before Kondo could rejoice, he saw Kawaki, Gintoki, and the others walking over. At the same time, they sized up Bubbles, who was behind him.
"What is this? Is this your mother?" Kawaki was puzzled and then greeted Bubbles, "How are you, Kondo's Okaasan."
"How is that possible!" Kondo retorted, "No matter how you look at it, it's a gorilla!"
"It's precisely because it's a gorilla that I think so." Kawaki replied, then revealed an emotional look, "It's really similar. The mother and son are carved out of the same mold."
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"I said no!" Kondo shouted.
"Could it be..." Suddenly, Kawaki thought of a certain possibility. He instantly punched Kondo and scolded, "You bastard, do you think that your old mother from the countryside will embarrass you?! Is it great to be a civil servant?! Since you become a civil servant, you start disliking your mother?! You didn't even think about who brought you into this world?"
Then, Kawaki looked at Bubbles again and sighed. He said, "It is better to cut ties with such an unfilial son as soon as possible."
Kondo covered his swollen cheek and got up. After wiping his nosebleed, he argued loudly, "How many times do you want me to say it? That is not my mother!"
"Really?!" Kawaki had a look of disbelief on his face. Then, he sized up both Bubbles and Kondo once again, "But you really look like a real mother and son!"
"We don't look at all good!" Kondo cursed. Then, he pointed at himself and said angrily, "Although I do look a bit like a gorilla, I am a real human!"
"Hey, what you said is too much." Gintoki walked over and reminded Kawaki in a low voice, "No matter what, you can't make fun of parents."
"That right!" Kondo cupped his hands and nodded.
"It should be something like a younger brother, right?" Gintoki continued.
"NO! In the end, do you also think that I am a gorilla?!" Kondo immediately exploded, "This is just a pet, a pet!"
"Pet? Really?" Gintoki questioned, "You're keeping one this big?"
"In the pet shop, she looked at me with a sad look, so..." Kondo rubbed the back of his head and forced a smile as he explained.
'Princess, I am very sorry! However, for the sake of me being able to raise my head in front of this group of people in the future, I am sorry!' Thinking of this, the corners of Kondo's mouth slightly curved up. He actually felt a little lucky in his heart, 'Great, it seems that the language barrier is also very beneficial.'
However, before Kondo could rejoice, he saw that Kawaki and Shinpachi had already started a fire. Gintoki and Kagura were sharpening their blades. The division of labor was very clear, and Bubbles had already been tied up.
"What do you want to do to the Princess?!" Kondo cursed.
"What are we going to do?" Kawaki looked at Kondo in surprise, "We are preparing for an outdoor barbecue? Can't you tell? Also, what princess?"
'I slipped up!' Kondo's face was covered in a cold sweat, but he still waved his hand and lied, "No, I mean, her name is Princess."
"Is that so?" After saying that, Kawaki looked at Bubbles again, "But speaking of which, this gorilla is really big. Its meat must be very delicious. Alright! Today's lunch is decided!"
"Enough!" As he shouted, Kondo stood in front of Bubbles and opened his hands, "Why do you do such a thing without the owner's consent?! You guys are too self-willed!"
"Tsk, what a stingy guy." Kawaki curled his lips in disdain.
"This has nothing to do with being stingy!" Kondo shouted and then turned to look at Bubbles behind him while thinking, 'It's so dangerous. With these people, Princess' life is in danger at every moment! I have to think of a way to leave this place quickly!'
"Isn't the so-called pet just a food reserve?" Kawaki pouted, "Isn't this common sense? Aren't you too stingy? You can't even finish such a big thing on your own."
"What kind of common sense is this?! There's no such common sense at all!" Kondo retorted. However, just as he finished retorting, he saw Gintoki nodding and standing beside Kawaki, "Why do you agree with this common sense?"
"Gin-chan, are you raising Sadaharu as a food reserve-aru?!" Kagura kicked Gintoki away and cursed.
"Isn't that common sense?" Gintoki covered his nose and slowly got up from the ground.
Hearing this, Kagura once again rushed toward Gintoki...
"Kawaki-san, I need to go to the toilet." Shinpachi lowered his head and said.
It could be seen that Shinpachi was not in high spirits.
"Oh," Kawaki answered, but then he thought of something. He then took out an envelope from his body and handed it to Shinpachi, "This is the reward."
"But we basically didn't do anything..." Shinpachi hurriedly declined.
"No, You've already helped a lot." Kawaki smiled and said, "Moreover, I don't want to become the kind of adult who doesn't keep his word."
Looking at the envelope in his hand, Shinpachi could not help but feel touched. He bowed to Kawaki and said, "Then thank you."
After saying that, Shinpachi walked to the other side.
"What a good child..." Kawaki murmured as he looked at Shinpachi's back.
Taking advantage of this time when no one was paying attention, Kondo felt relieved in his heart, 'Great, no one is paying attention! I can also take the Princess away!'
However, just as Kondo took two steps with Bubbles, Kondo felt something fall from the legs of his hakama.
Kawaki and Yorozuya were also attracted by a piece of mosaic on the ground behind Kondo.
"Ah, what is that?" Gintoki asked doubtfully.
"It's a turd-aru." Kagura replied.
"Right." Kawaki agreed.
'I'm finished! I wore my hakama over boxers! It rolled out from the hakama,' Kondo stopped, and his face was full of sweat.
"That... that seemed to have fallen out of your hakama just now." Gintoki pointed at the long and mosaiced object on the ground.
"You even kicked it," Kagura agreed.
"No, no, no, he is an adult," Kawaki waved his hand and said casually, "How could he do such a thing?"
Hearing this, Kondo could not help but feel a little touched. But before he could finish being touched, he heard Kawaki continue to say, "That should be his banana, right?"
"How is it possible!" Gintoki knocked Kawaki with his fist, "Although both of them are mosaic objects, this is obviously a piece of poop! Whether in terms of shape or color, it is poop! Besides, even if it is a banana, how can it fall out of the pants!"
"Ah, now that you said that, it is indeed a bit like poop." Kawaki nodded and replied, "But why is there poop here?"
As he spoke, Kawaki looked at Kondo. Gintoki and Kagura also looked at Kondo, and three pairs of eyes stared straight at Kondo.
Even if he did not turn around, Kondo could feel three strange gazes behind him.
'If I don't find an excuse, I will really be finished! I will never be able to lift my head for the rest of my life!'
At the same time, Kondo inadvertently glanced at Bubbles. He suddenly had a brilliant idea in his heart, 'Forgive me! Princess!'
"Princess!" Kondo gritted his teeth and cursed. Then, he raised his foot and kicked Bubbles into the landscape lake on the side, "Didn't I teach you not to defecate anywhere?!"
"I really don't know what to do with you. You always defecate anywhere you want." Kondo frowned and put on a helpless look, "This guy is really nerve-racking; I really don't know what to do with her."
Kawaki/ Kagura, "..."
"No, it obviously fell from you," Gintoki retorted.
"Wait, Sakata-kun, don't talk nonsense," Kondo complained, "How old do you think I am? I am thirty years old. How can I do that?"
"No," Kawaki pointed behind Kondo with an expressionless face, "See for yourself. You're leaving a trail."
"You guys have misunderstood," Kondo quickly defended, "This is, you know, biscuits I left as markers on the road so I wouldn't get lost."
"Ah, You're already lost. Lost on the path of life." Gintoki scoffed with a look of disdain.
"You're wrong, Gintoki." Kawaki shook his head, then raised a finger and corrected him, "It should be a gorilla life."
"There's no difference at all!" Gintoki shouted.
However, just as he finished speaking, Gintoki felt that something was wrong. The others also realized something because a huge shadow appeared under everyone's feet.
"Is today a cloudy day?" Kawaki muttered.
"The weather in Edo is really unpredictable. It will be sunny, and after a while, it will become cloudy." Kondo waved his hand and said casually.
"No, this morning, anchor Ketsuno clearly said that today is a sunny day." Gintoki propped up his chin and muttered.
"Do you really believe the weather forecast that relies on divination?" Kondo continued, "There is no scientific basis at all. Also, I only believe in her horoscope. I have never believed in the weather forecast."
"There is no difference between you and Gintoki," Kawaki commented expressionlessly.
However, soon after, everyone heard a loud roar coming from behind them.
"It's so noisy," Kawaki turned around and looked at Bubbles, who was behind them, and said with a face full of disdain. Then, he pulled out the umbrella at his waist, "Gintoki, prepare the fire. Kagura-chan, prepare the sauce. Gorilla, you... this has nothing to do with you. Just go to the side and concentrate on playing with your banana."
"You... What are you going to do?" Kondo swallowed his saliva.
"Is there a need to ask? Of course, it's an outdoor barbecue." As Kawaki spoke, he raised the umbrella in his hand.
However, before Kawaki could swing his hand down, Kondo, who was at the side, hurriedly pulled Kawaki back, "Hey! Wait! That won't do! Absolutely not!"
"I say you should also have a little backbone, okay?" Kawaki sighed softly and said earnestly, "When it is time to teach it a lesson, you should teach it a good lesson, right? Now it dares to shout at its owner; next time, it will dare to ride on your head and poop."
"I won't! I'll teach it a lesson when I get back. I don't need to trouble you!" Kondo hurriedly said.
"Then... alright." Kawaki had no choice but to give up. He turned to look at Gintoki and Kagura, "Hey, let's go."
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