22Critiques
4.68
- Qualité de l’écriture
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- Développement de l’histoire
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It's well written enough and it has great grammar, but you should've put tragedy tag still. Since some people hate that and it is annoying to read bad endings.
Gift for you Gift for you Gift yang tidak bisa di majalah male tersebut to download from your mobile phone to download from your mobile phone to download from your mobile phone
is this yuri? ? ?????????????????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ????????????
Good History-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
very good with the story already picking up on some emotional issues. I loved the first part and I'm enjoying the second,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
last chapters are giving a wonderful suspense -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------[img=update]
The story itself is interesting, sadly the Writing is on the Machine translated level of Grammer. If you don't mind MTL, then it's definitely worth a read.
Story is well written with all but there is one big problem same story is in Fanfiction under author named wallker so some notification would be appreciated. I mean author could have just two different pen names but it would nice to have some kind of explanation to it in synopsis.
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It's not a bad story, but I stopped reading when I realized that this was one of those authors who don't realize the difference between he/she....
The story would be perfect If I could understand the story at first try. I have to read it atleast 4 times ........ ............... .... ...
starting the second volume and moving towards the star rating without being all my comments. I'm so happy that people are enjoying. Let's go ahead with our story
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God..................... this Chapter 22 was quite sad........................... ........................................................... ..........
amazing ...........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................[img=recommend]
we are close to 30,000 words, I never thought this story would go so far; but I'm having fun writing it, even though it's just that, a fun. Don't expect a narratively perfect story, why won't you find one on my profile
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The whole plot and development is awesome. No Op and strong main character, he can be considered as very weak. I hope that author can continue to release more chapters. It has become one of my favourite Fate ff.
Moreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee))))) [img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update]
It's well written enough and it has great grammar, but you should've put tragedy tag still. Since some people hate that and it is annoying to read bad endings.
Gift for you Gift for you Gift yang tidak bisa di majalah male tersebut to download from your mobile phone to download from your mobile phone to download from your mobile phone
is this yuri? ? ?????????????????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ????????????
Good History-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
very good with the story already picking up on some emotional issues. I loved the first part and I'm enjoying the second,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
last chapters are giving a wonderful suspense -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------[img=update]
The story itself is interesting, sadly the Writing is on the Machine translated level of Grammer. If you don't mind MTL, then it's definitely worth a read.
Story is well written with all but there is one big problem same story is in Fanfiction under author named wallker so some notification would be appreciated. I mean author could have just two different pen names but it would nice to have some kind of explanation to it in synopsis.
exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp expexp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp expexp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp expexp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp expexp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp
It's not a bad story, but I stopped reading when I realized that this was one of those authors who don't realize the difference between he/she....
The story would be perfect If I could understand the story at first try. I have to read it atleast 4 times ........ ............... .... ...
starting the second volume and moving towards the star rating without being all my comments. I'm so happy that people are enjoying. Let's go ahead with our story
exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp expexp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp expexp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp expexp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp expexp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp
God..................... this Chapter 22 was quite sad........................... ........................................................... ..........
amazing ...........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................[img=recommend]
we are close to 30,000 words, I never thought this story would go so far; but I'm having fun writing it, even though it's just that, a fun. Don't expect a narratively perfect story, why won't you find one on my profile
................................................................................................ ............................................................................................................................................................................................
exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp expexp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp expexp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp expexp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp expexp exp exp exp exp exp exp exp
The whole plot and development is awesome. No Op and strong main character, he can be considered as very weak. I hope that author can continue to release more chapters. It has become one of my favourite Fate ff.
Moreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee))))) [img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update]
good protagonist that can fail his wagers and not aleays win
Spoiler de révélation