27Critiques
4.63
- Qualité de l’écriture
- Stabilité des mises à jour
- Développement de l’histoire
- Conception des personnages
- Contexte du monde
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The story is interesting and I even like the Characters. Grammar is good as well. Unfortunately the plot development feels inconsistent with the world as it is painted. Recruits are killed during an exam against bots, when there is absolutely no need for them to die. A military base on Mars is attacked for hours on end without Reinforcement from anywhere while the whole planet is supposedly a major military hub. During the attack Recruits lead the defence instead of their Instructors etc.. Physics in space also makes no sense with a maximum speed dependent on the engine (below light speed). There could be reasons for all those things, but if there are, they are never explained. Essentially thinks happen for the story, but make no sense.
La historia es impresionante pero desde que inicia el capítulo 14 se salta un montón de palabras y pierde coherencia o no están bien escritas las palabras porque hay espacios entre letras, además de que estoy pagando mis monedas para poder continuar la lectura no se vale. Por favor autor ordena la historia para que los lectores puedan disfrutarlo/la y no abandonarlo/la por esto.
So paid from chapter 14 on and needs to passes to unlock. This I just wanted to mention first. The characters known until then are cardboard stereo types that aren't fleshed out yet. The world sounds interesting and numbers don't make sense. How does a meal cost 500 and 2 good starfighter weapons 100.000? Just 200 meals? How do you need 15k hours (100 seconds make 1 minute and 100 minutes an hour, so even longer than it sounds) for a military flight license? You either don't give it to normal people at all or under reasonable circumstances. So yes, good story, bland characters, interesting world so far but nothing amazing and completely bonkers numbers. Without the numbers writing quality and world background would have been better.
Love the story and love the fact the female lead isnt immediately diving into some romance arc. It's so hard to find a good novel with a female lead that isnt romance. Question: Was the fast pass price increase intentional? I noted the last few chapters doubled in price.
wow! i really like this story and characters. im not susally an fl reader but this one is cool. i like how smart she iss and i wish i could read more but im alwaysss broke lolol
On a military planet with mechas and warships that train recruits, when attacked from within and the fight goes on for a couple of hours but there are no reinforcements is impossible. A couple of warships from space will bomb them to death. This whole Synthetic terror chapter made put down the novel.
I hate jumping into stories blindly and I hate the fact that this story has no tags so can someone tell me the tags? ( i need a longer review)
Hey Author, is this yuri or straight? love your book BTW!!❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️❤️💚❤️💚💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️❤️💚❤️❤️💚❤️
very good! the author is doing a great job. It's hard these days to find a job whose female protagonist is not a militant freak who hates and curses men at the first opportunity she gets..this book is written with mastery, the protagonist has a good brain in the head and knows how to reason and judge right and wrong.!!
I’m just gonna say it now I have just started it and I’m having a blast sucks it’s locked from 14 tho… and just think there should be tags, I was skeptical as to what I was getting into. It’s fun tho.great work
I am giving the low world background because of the physics problems. The author mentions speeds like 200m/s 100m/s as the maximal speed of some engines. They are in space and in space, there is no terminal velocity other than the speed of light so engines can keep accelerating until they reach it. In space, the speed is almost of no consequence. The only important is relative speed or delta-v (delta velocity). That is a difference of speed between two objects. If the author wants to express the power of engines he/she should express it as acceleration and not speed. Speed starts to matter only in the atmosphere because the friction of air introduces terminal velocity. To surpass this terminal velocity you need to increase engine power and when the speed increases so does the friction so to keep increasing maximal speed you need to increase engine power. In space, there is no friction and therefore no force that limits the maximum achievable speed of shuttler/ space fighter/rocket/missile/escape pod. The only terminal velocity in space is the speed of light and only when objects is moving in relativistic velocities the engine speed maters. So if there is some engine speed limit it should be in percents of C that is about 2000000 m/s upwards and more likely 10000000 m/s and absolutely nowhere as lows 200 m/s. I like the story but these physics problems introduce in me a such massive dissonance. (That is't how reality works like). The other sci fi things aren'T that problematic but this is to me so fundamental that it breaks me out of the story. And it would be so easy to fix it wouldn't affect the story much and I would be glad to give a much higher rating than what I given now.
Author here coming in with the 13th review, so you don’t have to, lol. Wanted to take this time to thank everyone for all your support. I appreciate all of you, even if you’ve only read a single chapter. For those who comment regularly - sorry I don’t respond right away. I can only see them if I review the chapters over and over (or if I visit your profile directly). And for those who don’t comment at all and just read - I want you to know that I see you, and I appreciate you. For anyone who wants to chat, feel free to reach out via Discord. Hope you all continue to enjoy the book and I hope to see you all at the end!
I finished reading up to the latest chapter and i gotta say i really enjoyed this novel and am really excited to see what comes next! Thanks for the amazing work
Excellent book! An interesting mixture of science-fiction and romance. Your main lead, Eve, has a strong, expressive character, you designed her carefully. The plot is intriguing. You nicely created the world. Well done! You don't struggle, like most of us, with tenses, style, or grammar so it's a pleasure to read it.
Spoiler de révélation
I recently found the book and really enjoyed the book. I got caught up with the most recent chapter. I look forward to what will come next in the book.
I'm only in chapter 14 but I already think this story is great, but I have a concern... will the protagonist follow Yuri's path or will she catch that random guy?
Spoiler de révélation
Just started reading, overall good work. I don't really see the reason behind the game aspect of it though. As far as I can tell it doesn't seem to have a purpose except to connect to a larger audience. As well as the main character going into detail about stuff a game would usually not have. This opinion may change later on, we will see. If it doesn't I'll just pretend it has nothing to do with a game. I like the attention to detail, and how most of the technology has an explanation behind it, instead of saying "it was very advanced technology." The main character seems trope heavy but interesting nonetheless. Keep up the good work.
Spoiler de révélation
Love your story! I like everything about it. Beautifully written. Well done! I just don't understand why you don't have reviews, etc. why don't you promote it?
Spoiler de révélation
I like the story so rate it like this but the problem is that this will turn into romance and I'm not ready for that yet..... So yeah乁( •_• )ㄏ
Wow! You have a great imagination, man (or woman)! You nicely create the world you write about. The plot is interesting. The story is a good read!
Spoiler de révélation
Love the cover page! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 The story is interesting, also your characters. The world you have created is nicely designed. Well done, Author.
The other review says all i have to say but thought you deserved a 5 star for just how brilliant the bit I’ve read is i commented on chapter before i read review lol
I love everything about this book except the fact that it locks the chapters starting from chapter 14. I love the concept of a futuristic world and the writing is definitely great but it sucks that you have to use fast passes and/or unlock chapters so early on, and you can't really enjoy the book without spending.
this is by far one of the better stories I have read on this app, and I have no earthly idea why this isn't more popular! it has a fantastic hook and continues to exceed my expectations at every turn. the chapters are long, so quite worth the money, and well, it is generally interesting. much recommended read.
The story is interesting and I even like the Characters. Grammar is good as well. Unfortunately the plot development feels inconsistent with the world as it is painted. Recruits are killed during an exam against bots, when there is absolutely no need for them to die. A military base on Mars is attacked for hours on end without Reinforcement from anywhere while the whole planet is supposedly a major military hub. During the attack Recruits lead the defence instead of their Instructors etc.. Physics in space also makes no sense with a maximum speed dependent on the engine (below light speed). There could be reasons for all those things, but if there are, they are never explained. Essentially thinks happen for the story, but make no sense.
La historia es impresionante pero desde que inicia el capítulo 14 se salta un montón de palabras y pierde coherencia o no están bien escritas las palabras porque hay espacios entre letras, además de que estoy pagando mis monedas para poder continuar la lectura no se vale. Por favor autor ordena la historia para que los lectores puedan disfrutarlo/la y no abandonarlo/la por esto.
So paid from chapter 14 on and needs to passes to unlock. This I just wanted to mention first. The characters known until then are cardboard stereo types that aren't fleshed out yet. The world sounds interesting and numbers don't make sense. How does a meal cost 500 and 2 good starfighter weapons 100.000? Just 200 meals? How do you need 15k hours (100 seconds make 1 minute and 100 minutes an hour, so even longer than it sounds) for a military flight license? You either don't give it to normal people at all or under reasonable circumstances. So yes, good story, bland characters, interesting world so far but nothing amazing and completely bonkers numbers. Without the numbers writing quality and world background would have been better.
Love the story and love the fact the female lead isnt immediately diving into some romance arc. It's so hard to find a good novel with a female lead that isnt romance. Question: Was the fast pass price increase intentional? I noted the last few chapters doubled in price.
wow! i really like this story and characters. im not susally an fl reader but this one is cool. i like how smart she iss and i wish i could read more but im alwaysss broke lolol
On a military planet with mechas and warships that train recruits, when attacked from within and the fight goes on for a couple of hours but there are no reinforcements is impossible. A couple of warships from space will bomb them to death. This whole Synthetic terror chapter made put down the novel.
I hate jumping into stories blindly and I hate the fact that this story has no tags so can someone tell me the tags? ( i need a longer review)
Hey Author, is this yuri or straight? love your book BTW!!❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️❤️💚❤️💚💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️❤️💚❤️❤️💚❤️
very good! the author is doing a great job. It's hard these days to find a job whose female protagonist is not a militant freak who hates and curses men at the first opportunity she gets..this book is written with mastery, the protagonist has a good brain in the head and knows how to reason and judge right and wrong.!!
I’m just gonna say it now I have just started it and I’m having a blast sucks it’s locked from 14 tho… and just think there should be tags, I was skeptical as to what I was getting into. It’s fun tho.great work
I am giving the low world background because of the physics problems. The author mentions speeds like 200m/s 100m/s as the maximal speed of some engines. They are in space and in space, there is no terminal velocity other than the speed of light so engines can keep accelerating until they reach it. In space, the speed is almost of no consequence. The only important is relative speed or delta-v (delta velocity). That is a difference of speed between two objects. If the author wants to express the power of engines he/she should express it as acceleration and not speed. Speed starts to matter only in the atmosphere because the friction of air introduces terminal velocity. To surpass this terminal velocity you need to increase engine power and when the speed increases so does the friction so to keep increasing maximal speed you need to increase engine power. In space, there is no friction and therefore no force that limits the maximum achievable speed of shuttler/ space fighter/rocket/missile/escape pod. The only terminal velocity in space is the speed of light and only when objects is moving in relativistic velocities the engine speed maters. So if there is some engine speed limit it should be in percents of C that is about 2000000 m/s upwards and more likely 10000000 m/s and absolutely nowhere as lows 200 m/s. I like the story but these physics problems introduce in me a such massive dissonance. (That is't how reality works like). The other sci fi things aren'T that problematic but this is to me so fundamental that it breaks me out of the story. And it would be so easy to fix it wouldn't affect the story much and I would be glad to give a much higher rating than what I given now.
Author here coming in with the 13th review, so you don’t have to, lol. Wanted to take this time to thank everyone for all your support. I appreciate all of you, even if you’ve only read a single chapter. For those who comment regularly - sorry I don’t respond right away. I can only see them if I review the chapters over and over (or if I visit your profile directly). And for those who don’t comment at all and just read - I want you to know that I see you, and I appreciate you. For anyone who wants to chat, feel free to reach out via Discord. Hope you all continue to enjoy the book and I hope to see you all at the end!
I finished reading up to the latest chapter and i gotta say i really enjoyed this novel and am really excited to see what comes next! Thanks for the amazing work
Excellent book! An interesting mixture of science-fiction and romance. Your main lead, Eve, has a strong, expressive character, you designed her carefully. The plot is intriguing. You nicely created the world. Well done! You don't struggle, like most of us, with tenses, style, or grammar so it's a pleasure to read it.
Spoiler de révélation I recently found the book and really enjoyed the book. I got caught up with the most recent chapter. I look forward to what will come next in the book.
I'm only in chapter 14 but I already think this story is great, but I have a concern... will the protagonist follow Yuri's path or will she catch that random guy?
Spoiler de révélation Just started reading, overall good work. I don't really see the reason behind the game aspect of it though. As far as I can tell it doesn't seem to have a purpose except to connect to a larger audience. As well as the main character going into detail about stuff a game would usually not have. This opinion may change later on, we will see. If it doesn't I'll just pretend it has nothing to do with a game. I like the attention to detail, and how most of the technology has an explanation behind it, instead of saying "it was very advanced technology." The main character seems trope heavy but interesting nonetheless. Keep up the good work.
Spoiler de révélation Love your story! I like everything about it. Beautifully written. Well done! I just don't understand why you don't have reviews, etc. why don't you promote it?
Spoiler de révélation I like the story so rate it like this but the problem is that this will turn into romance and I'm not ready for that yet..... So yeah乁( •_• )ㄏ
Wow! You have a great imagination, man (or woman)! You nicely create the world you write about. The plot is interesting. The story is a good read!
Spoiler de révélation Love the cover page! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 The story is interesting, also your characters. The world you have created is nicely designed. Well done, Author.
The other review says all i have to say but thought you deserved a 5 star for just how brilliant the bit I’ve read is i commented on chapter before i read review lol
I love everything about this book except the fact that it locks the chapters starting from chapter 14. I love the concept of a futuristic world and the writing is definitely great but it sucks that you have to use fast passes and/or unlock chapters so early on, and you can't really enjoy the book without spending.
this is by far one of the better stories I have read on this app, and I have no earthly idea why this isn't more popular! it has a fantastic hook and continues to exceed my expectations at every turn. the chapters are long, so quite worth the money, and well, it is generally interesting. much recommended read.