Chapter 35: The Hard Working Princess (I).
Elizabeth's POV
"Full marks…"
"Well written essay."
"Nothing wrong with the formula you have presented- it is right."
Each tutors looked at me in surprise, were they expecting for me to flunk or have different results other than perfect?
I've studied a lot in my past life, academic trifles and been dealt with its stress- I never thought I would be experiencing it again but with such a younger body I can only do much and with the thought of these people being assassins out to kill me, the stress would usually double.
However, given that Victoria would be by my side is enough protection. She stood behind me ensuring my safety,
A month has gone by, I haven't forgotten my raging display that I did… the first day the scholars came.
I yelled, screamed and threatened these scholars to be fired if they dared say rude things to my maid.
After our meeting, the conversation of schedules, appointed lessons and my future has already been decided.
Victoria held my hand as we walked out of that library telling me to not worry, "I will find a way to lessen your burden, princess. I will plead for your father to rethink his decision. While I did try the first… the second or third he might have a change of heart."
She gave me a smile reassuring hope in my eyes, but my heart tells me it won't be that easy.
I've already given the emperor a study of his character, he was a man swayed by power.
"The stories Victoria told me, the emperor was kind, laughed amongst his friends and subordinates." I muttered to myself while taking notes, I decided to keep a journal in order to keep me sane in the following years to come. "Victoria has told me war changes people, such change does not exclude the emperor."
I was left in my room, tossing and turning every night.
I couldn't sleep so soundly. Not even the healing soothing voice of Victoria's soft singing would lull me back to sleep. I just closed my eyes and moved when I felt her figure no longer near.
I stood up and walked towards the windows seeing the dark damp sky, no stars in sight.
The scene just replayed back and forth in my mind.
The life I lived, I've only been here five years but the plans given to me with no choice has gotten me aching.
"I messed up." I confessed to my mistake, going back to bed holding my pillow telling myself over and over again that I should be better.
If I want to have Victoria to continue being by my side, I have to not only see the possibility of her being dismissed as my personal maid to be replaced if I didn't do well in my studies.
I had to be aware that what I did was utterly disappointing.
Instead of keeping my head and mind calm, I took one's insult for a dagger that plunged into my chest not knowing it had become a sword the moment I let my emotions become overflowing with rage.
I do not regret my decision of defending Victoria of her name, title and worth.
What I regretted is that I did it in such a rash way that only proved they were right. My actions, unstable emotions, and rash thinking made me take another look in the mirror and observed myself.
"I'm someone who had her memories attached when I was at the right age to think, knowing what's right and wrong. I embodied the responsibilities of others when I was living in my past life, how crude of me to think that forgetting all of that to live an easy life as a royal?"
…
The following morning came and I looked at my tired eyes in my vanity mirror.
I felt so alone.
Ever since the emperor came back I've only grown more lonely, the times with Victoria even if she promised to not leave my side- my lessons have been keeping me away from her day and night.
Every night I had to study, in fear that the scholars would suddenly bring a hard question on a random day if I was not ready to answer it.
Shame would be reported through the noble circle because I believed that one of them was a spy. In one of my lessons in the first week I made a wrong answer in one of my tests, I did not think much of it because it was one mistake on the paper.
I was a carefree princess going back and forth to the empress' secret room that was left for me and I often tidied things up, analyzing the items she's left.
Apparently the outside had gotten news of my blunder and the rumors got worse.
Instead of having one mistake on one of my exams, it turned into, "The princess had gotten so many mistakes in her studies and that it's been feared she has no prowess or talent at all academically."
"There would be hope for a country with a princess who couldn't even make a simple question right."
Hearing this I clicked my tongue, I learned from my lesson of rage to ignore the rumors that are not true that cause no actual harm, as I know the truth it would be enough.
If I screamed or yelled at any of the scholars, the one specific scholar that must've smuggled in the information of my marks- it would only smear my progress of keeping a clean reputation from now.
Refuting or complaining to my father, I know it won't work. He trusted the opinions of the scholars more than her own daughter.
Victoria worried about my health often, now the rumors circulating made her mad and now it was her turn to be angry. She vented to me fist clenched and marched outside of my room once she had heard.
"I don't care if they insult me, of my humble beginnings- of my status and occupation as a maid! But they dare talk about the princess who studies very hard just to give the kingdom a bright future ahead?!" My maid ought to tear the scholars down a peg but I calmed her down.
It made me slightly happy seeing her angry for my sake but I quickly took her by my side and hugged her though.
I remembered the words she told me before when dealing with the scholars, looking up at her I said. "They are not worth it."
I mouthed to her and she immediately backed down, looking guilty that she's shown her angry side to me and apologized.
"Forgive me, princess for being… out of control of my emotions. It's just when I heard them insult you like that, I- just." (Victoria) couldn't say it, but she knew an insult to the princess was like an insult to the late empress. "I couldn't help myself."
Melrose has got her own set of problems and she didn't have time to visit. It seems that my father's persuasion for me to find scholars has also affected her but not as bad as mine.
She only had five hours of studying to do, etiquette lessons, what was left of her time was to socialize and take care of herself; having basic needs like eating, hygiene care and sleep.
I missed talking with her and often awaited for any letters that she might come to visit around to play. I have only received her latest letter dating two weeks ago. I peeled off the red wax with her family seal out of excitement, that I have forgotten to use my paper knife on getting it open.
How sorry she was that she can't visit anytime soon to play and talk about stories.
The only days I've had in touch with her was with the social balls we had to attend, I taught her the proper way of greeting acquaintances.
Our 'friends' of lower nobility that wanted to curry in our favor.
I also taught her the proper way to excuse herself, by curtsying with a cough, saddened expression and the following words.
"I do not feel well, I hope to not offend the noble family member but I need to excuse myself to get some fresh air."
I could often see Melrose carrying a fan or handkerchief after my teaching. She has used it to escape the noble children's plea to curry favor.
"Cough, cough, cough! I have to go get some fresh air, apologies." (Melrose) covers half of her face hiding her horrible acting. I chuckled seeing her figure running towards me once she escaped from the crowd.
I taught her a certain hand language we can know, I raised her hand up in an open palm and proceeded to high five it. I smacked my hand into hers and explained what would be that meaning between the two of us.
It would be a symbol of our bonded sisterhood, every time we found ourselves in a small victory- we did a high five and we would smile every time running away from our duties.
"Nice one, cousin of mine." I complimented her and we went onto a private table where no one dared to destroy our happy auras.
"Hehe, thank you!"
Even at a young age, Melrose was mischievous. I am only adding oil into the fire. While it was not wrong to build relationships from such an early age, seeing how she is in her current state and the current people in the social ball.
I've instructed her to only use that technique of escaping if she feels uncomfortable, and told her the importance of making relationships with other nobles that might help curry favors when I'm not around to help.
Everyone just wanted Melrose to be used as a pawn, and as her elder cousin I cannot let that happen.
Uncle Damien has not shown up in my face to talk to me after humiliating me not too long ago, being sure to keep being out of my sight and that made me breathe a sigh of relief.
With the month that the emperor has come back and he impeded a few rules that became too much for the servants to bear. He suddenly ordered an inspection once every week, if there was any sign of a weapon, illegal documentation, bastard children, wrong etiquette, and it had only been approved recently- 'Husband above their Women'.
Many rich nobles around these parts have concubines, while before thanks to the late empress a sense of equality had built up over the years she has ruled over the kingdom, lasting a decade even after her passing.
Women can divorce, find work without needing the permission of their husband or anyone else, and they can practice magic and obtain education with no problem as long as they have the right documents and a clean background.
The emperor at the time supported his wife, after doing some research he was quite the supporter but that all changed and now every right that women have will be stripped.
They are not allowed to have any say if the man wanted, noble ladies are not allowed to go outside without proper cover in the faces and they are not allowed to work- not unless permitted by a high official.
It caused quite an uproar, especially to the noble and the commoner ladies.
The men in the kingdom took a good liking to the new rule, their properties- would be safe even without a prenup. They could even take the women's assets if they wanted to.
…
A rebellion was slowly forming, women who wanted their equality back were thinking of a way to file a complaint, yell and hope that the emperor would hear and change the rule.
Many have theorized on why he made this rule, was it because he lost to a woman- the demon lord of the demon kingdom that it hurt his pride? Now he can't see women in the same eye?
Perhaps it was, because the next week the women servants- maids, only a few cooks remained that were women.
…
I held my heart seeing the maid servants I have made friends with over the time I was here. They all packed their bags, red eyes and swelling as they waved goodbye.
"Your highness, it was an honor serving you." Was their last words to me. I could only watch at the gate entrance, seeing them carrying their luggage I was left with a hole in my heart.
I wanted to run, say goodbye and thank them for all the duties they've given me.
I wanted to reward them for all the hard work they did serving me and cleaning, keeping the castle in good condition and often telling me stories of their hometown from the festivals, cultures and their people.
At first they saw me as a princess, then they gradually knew me as more than that.
"Ugh! Stupid old man!" I threw the pillow into the wooden frame of my bed and remembered everyone else who was left.
My younger cousin, Tobias and the guards that swore loyalty to protect me and Victoria.
But knowing with the new rule implemented Victoria might be forced to find a husband, someone in the patriarchy to keep her afloat- and what if she decided she was tired of taking care of me?
Even if she says she'll be there forever by her side, seeds of doubt grew within me.
"Victoria, one day will you leave me?" I often pondered alone. My personal maid that had become my mother figure had a lover somewhere in her hometown, in the province beyond the kingdom's walls.
I needed to do better.
Because I know I can't rely on Victoria forever.