(Author's note: Thank you all for your patience. The following chapters are somewhat longer to make up for my long absense.)
My fight with Fa Min ended with me yielding. I had injured him while in my altered state, something totally unlike me. It wasn’t until I spoke to Master Fa that I understood a bit more.
What I felt inside me, the ‘two consciousness’ that were warring for the control of my body during the fight, were my mind and spirit being separated.
At a moment of intense concentration – meaning my duel with Min – my spirit rebelled against the conscious decision I had made about marrying Bai Fan. Its discontent had accumulated since I slept with Ling and figured out that I couldn’t stay with her despite our feelings. The Heavenly Tribulation I went through days before, had only given it strength.
This means that every time that I do something I don’t like, I have to listen to a part of me protest about the need for such a decision.