Chapitre 4: Colors Of Life

On the other side...

Raelle had waited till midnight before making her way home just to avoid seeing her grandfather. She took off her heels at the door and tiptoed her way through the dark house. However, just as she was about to ascend the stairs, all the lights in the house lit up. Raelle's body froze right where she was, with her one foot dangling in the air.

"Xiang Yenay!"

This was her Chinese name which she only heard from her grandfather's mouth and only when he was angry with her. In fact, there was no one outside of this house who knew about her Chinese name. Since she grew up in Country G, she didn't have to use her Chinese name. And personally, she still preferred being called 'Raelle'.

Raelle straightened up and languidly stepped around to get to the family room. She was met with the furious eyes of her grandfather. Although the elderly man was sitting in a wheelchair, had a frail and sluggish constitution, his eyes were still as sharp as a hawk. They seem to be trying to probe her soul.

However, Raelle had always been like a blank paper. She was just as she seemed; arrogant and clever but also very realistic. She never had anything to hide, especially from her grandfather whom she worshipped.

The elderly man was in his late sixties, his face was expressionless and yet seemed dignified. Because he once had served in the military, he exuded an air of magnificence, intimidation, and heroism. He was a man who had braved countless storms.

Since Raelle didn't feel good looking at him from above, she respectfully kneeled down before him to come at his eye level. She seemed well-mannered before the elderly man who might have been past his prime but was still a powerful figure. Although she stood at the pinnacle of success, before her grandfather, she was nothing but humble and respectful.

She slowly looked at her grandfather's expressions and uttered, "Opa,[1] this time I didn't play any trick. Even before I could do anything, the blind date fell apart."

Xiang Tianyu, her grandfather rubbed his forehead and said, "It means you had some tricks up your sleeves, eh?"

She smiled beautifully and noted, "I'm your granddaughter. How can I not have any tricks up my sleeves?"

"Is that something to brag about?" he sounded harsh.

Her smile didn't drop even though he was being so stern. In fact, her smile was relaxed as she continued, "Opa, I already told you to let's not do this. How many blind dates have failed already? Why don't you just accept that I am fine the way I am?"

Grandfather Xiang felt distressed as he said, "Is it so wrong that I wish for you to be happy?"

Raelle's brows furrowed slightly as she asserted, "How am I not happy? I have a belief in life, one should never settle for less. Relationships are all built on mutual benefits. Either you call it love or happiness, it's just human selfishness in the end. People get into relationships to fill the voids they feel in their hearts. They look for warmth that is missing in their lives. It's all about benefits. It's all just like a business transaction. Once they feel like that warmth is not enough, they choose to break up and get divorced. We are all playing a game of monopoly in the name of love and feelings." Her grandfather's eyes were complicated while she didn't stop there, "But when I already feel happy in life, why should I get into a relationship to look for happiness? The other person has to offer something more for me to be enticed into a relationship. At least something more than useless feelings." She took a pause to add, "Besides, if a person is not happy within himself, how is that person supposed to find happiness through a relationship?"

"Shut up!"

Raelle flinched and sealed her lips. Oh-uh! It seemed she again ticked off her grandfather. But she didn't mind it, her grandfather would never stay angry with her for long. She wouldn't lie; she also manipulated his love for her. At least, he said it was love. Even if she didn't know what this love felt like, she definitely knew she was important to him more than anything.

"Elder Xiang," came the voice of a lady as she stepped up and rubbed Grandfather's chest. "You shouldn't get this angry. It's not good for your health."

Raelle looked at the lady and mouthed her thank you. The lady, Mu Chenyan smiled at her and shook her head in resignation. She was the adoptive daughter of Grandfather Xiang. She lost her parents when she was very young and during that time Grandmother Xiang had taken in this pitiful child who lost her family. Now, even though Grandmother Xiang was not around, she was.

"Why don't you tell this stubborn girl to stop infuriating me?!"

Raelle showed a pitiful look. There was no fluctuation in her emotions but she had mastered the art of expressions. It was indeed to deceive this grandfather of hers who worried that she was too emotionless. This was precisely why he had been arranging so many blind dates for her. He thought if she fell in love or even developed some kind of feelings of goodwill, everything would be fine.

"Poppet, you said you're happy. Please define this happiness you feel."

Raelle's expressions turned solemn as she recited, "I feel joy and contentment in whatever I have. I feel like my life is good, meaningful, and worthwhile." She felt proud of herself for some reason.

Grandfather Xiang looked up at Mu Chenyan as he questioned, "Did you hear that? She still thinks she can fool me with a textbook definition of happiness."

Raelle sighed out, "Opa, you told me to smile and see how brightly I smile. What else do you want from me?"

"Poppet, this smile has stopped fooling me now. It doesn't come from your heart."

Raelle's expressions shifted, as she also looked at Mu Chenyan and said, "Yanyan, you've studied medicine. Why don't you remind my Opa that the heart's job is to pump blood and keep us alive? It has nothing to do with happiness."

"Young Miss, your grandfather's worries are justified." Raelle gaped at her in disbelief as she continued, "You are a smart person. You've read countless books. You must have read, 'Being human is not about feeling happy, it's about feeling everything.'"

Raelle nodded her head, "Yes, that's a quote by Glennon Doyle." She didn't miss a beat before answering correctly. With her impeccable memory, it wasn't difficult to recall something she read once.

"Correct!" started Mu Chenyan. "Even if we believe that you're happy in your life, we wish for you to feel everything and not just happiness."

"Even if it's pain?" questioned Raelle seriously.

Mu Chenyan nodded her head honestly, "Yes, even if it means you'd get hurt. We wish for you to feel that pain. Because only then you can say you've lived life to the fullest. A living person should taste all colors life has to offer."

[1] 'Opa': It means Grandfather, originated in Germany.